Just Add Hormones: An Insider's Guide to the Transsexual Experience

by Matt Kailey

Matt Kailey lived as a straight woman for the first forty-two years of his life. Though happy as a social worker and teacher, he knew something wasn't right. Then he made some changes. With the help of a good therapist, chest surgery, and some strong doses of testosterone, Kailey began his journey toward becoming a man.

As his body morphed and his voice dropped, Kailey began noticing subtle shifts in the way he was treated. Men suddenly stopped offering to change flat tires for him but insisted on talking to him about women and bodily functions. Women got nervous when he baby-talked to their infants but routinely asked him to move heavy things around the office. In these everyday exchanges, Kailey recognized the many ways we define what it means to be male. He also realized that, with few role models, he had to learn to accept himself as a person between two genders.

As he writes about his transition from female to male, Kailey answers all the questions you've ever had about what it's like to live as a transsexual. From the fear of public restrooms to deciding whether to "pack" his pants, Kailey explains what the world looks like from his new vantage point-a position more people are discovering as gender transitions become increasingly common.

More than a memoir, Just Add Hormones is full of sound advice for those who may be questioning their gender. And through his story, Kailey offers valuable insights to the families and friends of those who have started a transition.

Funny, fresh, and incredibly candid, Just Add Hormones can help us all consider-and even laugh at-our own notions of what it means to be a man or a woman.

Genres: Nonfiction, Gender, Queer, Transgender, LGBT, Memoir, Gender Studies

171 pages, Hardcover

First published June 15, 2005

About the author

Matthew Scott Kailey (March 17, 1955 – May 18, 2014) was a trans male author, educator, and transgender activist.

Kailey was born in 1955 in Omaha, Nebraska to Shirley and George “Rod” Kailey. He earned a BA in Sociology and Psychology at Iowa State University and an MA in Education from the University of Missouri-Kansas City. He later moved to Colorado and began a career as a social caseworker.

Kailey began his female-to-male transition at the age of 42, transitioning from a straight woman to a gay trans man. After leaving social work, he became a writer for Out Front Colorado, one of the country's oldest LGBT publications. In 2007 he became its managing editor, making Kailey the highest-ranking trans journalist of an LGBT publication.

Kailey documented his gender transition in his books Just Add Hormones: An Insider’s Guide to the Transsexual Experience (2005) and Teeny Weenies and Other Short Subjects (2012). He wrote a guidebook, My Child is Transgender: 10 Tips for Parents of Adult Trans Children. He wrote an award-winning blog, Tranifesto, spoke at numerous conferences, and offered workplace training on transgender issues. He also taught courses in psychology, human sexuality, and transgender studies at Red Rocks Community College and Metropolitan State University of Denver.

Kailey died in his sleep of heart failure on May 18, 2014.

Reviews

[Evan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Informative, interesting. A simple, straight(ha)foward book about Matt's experiences in the world as a transguy. Invaluable in the sense that there are very few books written about female to male transexuals from their own point of view. The book is neatly divided into sections, such as, Trans Minds, Trans Identity, Trans bodies, Trans Sexuality, Trans Pride, and Post Trans. All in less than 200 pages. The book is largely written from a happy person's point of view which I find terribly interesting and not quite believable. For most people it is such a struggle leading up to transition and this is not covered at all really. Maybe the book is implying once transition is "done" then it's like happily ever after. Maybe I'm being a little bit of an a__hole 'cause Matt's so f____ing together. There are a few tough experiences explored briefly in the book, such as transitioning on the job, the great bathroom issue, and people, mainly close relatives, still slipping with the old pronouns. All in all a definite must read for any FTM out there. Thanks to Matt for writing it.

[A.M. · Rating 4 out of 5]

In terms of helping a general audience understand transsexualism, what transition involves, why people need it, and the particular issues trans people as a community face, this is a pretty good book. Kailey also seems to be aiming to educate trans people curious about transition and understanding the difficulties they will face throughout the process and after, and I think he achieves these aims as well. His style is straightforward, with a conversational, occasionally light tone that makes for a quick, easy read. Those expecting a deeper memoir on Kailey's childhood, life pre-transition, and what compelled him to transition will likely be disappointed. Personally, as I didn't see this as the book's aim, didn't bug me as much.

I do feel with other readers who were put off by Kailey's dismissal of "male privilege" a couple times near the beginning. It put me off too, but as I read further into the book, it's pretty clear he thinks women are more deeply harmed by sexism, via scrutiny over their bodies and the fear they feel because of men's actions. It's possible that he sees (or saw, since he recently passed away) his out trans status as effectively canceling out aspects of any male privilege he might be afford. Or he really just doesn't see it. But I would not say there is any antagonism toward feminism in general.

He also covers the real difficulties trans people face, how they are adversely affected by marriage laws, how they are often stigmatized and targets for violence. He deals with his own difficulties finding romance after his transition and fitting into the gay world as a trans man. There is an attitude of acceptance throughout, but great honesty in conveying the real struggles he and others far worse off must go through.

Really, my only major criticism is the book is structured more as a collection of short essays and is thus rather spotty, even though it is organized in related sections. This is pretty minor, though, compared to the overall value of the content.

[Arna · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5-3 stars for me. I purchased this book as I currently have a family member undergoing female-to-male transition, and I was interested to read about the experience from the point of view of someone who has "been there and done that". While there were a number of interesting points made, and it was a good summary of one person's experiences, I didn't feel like I had any additional insights into the process or experience, so the title possibly slightly oversold the premise.

[Kate Nelson]

This book is extremely dated. There are much better books out there with trans stories.

[Nikki · Rating 1 out of 5]

i have a feeling this is going to be a very dumb book.

'kay now I'm done with it.

meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh mehmeh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh.

That book review was to make my friend laugh.

[Adrianne · Rating 5 out of 5]

What would you think of a newly out book titled "Just Add Hormones" with a cover design featuring two huge test tubes, the sort you expect to see on a biochemistry manual? "Clinical, too clinical!" is what I thought, "more than probably sterile of humor and devoid of linguistic merit". I have been misled.
I noted the title at the bottom of my gender-studies-to-read list, and it wasn't until after I had pretty much read everything else available in the field, that I eventually did pick a copy of the book.
And I couldn't put it down! I was hooked to its delightful, fascinating, full of laugh-out-loud humor and verbal wit, story.
Is it really so difficult to be a man, a transman in particular? Having just read the personal account of someone who has lived in both the realms of women and (trans)men, I would probably reconsider, if I were to transition. Or at least think twice.

[Ben · Rating 4 out of 5]

Yay! An easy-to-read book of reasonable length about what it's like to be transsexual today (specifically female-to-male, though the author does a great job of expressing the universality of The Trans Experience--opening in Vegas August 2008!).

+Cool cover design.
+Kailey's writing style is engaging and personable, with a great mix of personal anecdotes and broad examples.
+Yay, talking about gender neutral bathrooms!

-Though I understand that the book is about transsexuals rather than transgenders, the neutral pronouns "ze," "hir," and "nu" were included in the glossary without being used at all in the text proper. Wherefore!
-No mention of metoidioplasty in the text proper or glossary, though phalloplasty is referenced several times.

[Julian Pecenco · Rating 3 out of 5]

A reasonable book, with some interesting observations, but it didn't really flow very well. I had really hoped for more of a memoir, and it left me wanting to know more of his personal story, particularly given his experience of being so femme as a female. I recognize that for those those new to trans issues, some background might be needed, but it really felt much more like yet another Trans 101, rather than an engaging memoir. (I'm currently in the midst of listening to Chaz Bono's new book, Transition, which I am finding much more satisfying.)

[Courtney · Rating 1 out of 5]

Incredibly shallow and simplified account of the trans experience. Kailey's half-defensive, half-preachy tone accented by trite, unfunny similes did little to enlighten the reader as to the motivations and internal struggle felt by the trans community. Perhaps this would be helpful for someone who knows absolutely nothing about queer or trans culture. But even then, I would hesitate to recommend this remarkably incomplete monologue.

[JM · Rating 5 out of 5]

Society has a seething obsession for everything that breeds limits: categories, labels, definitions, norms. Intangible stoppers. Imagined walls. From a practical point of view, these limits are necessary to maintain order. The problem, however, lies in society’s inclination for confinement. We tend to put too much faith in givens that, when alternatives and other possibilities turn up, we either crouch back in irrational fear or launch headfirst in irrational hostility. This overblown faith in givens is manifested in heteronormativity-- in the binary gender system, in strict and razor-sharp definitions of masculinity, femininity, and now, even of homo, bi and trans-sexuality.

Matt Kailey’s Just Add Hormones: An Insider’s Guide to the Transsexual Experience challenges society’s predisposition towards restrictions and restrictiveness. In less than two hundred pages, Kailey gives an extensive and occasionally hilarious walkthrough of his experiences, plights, and views as a gay transsexual. A tricky part of discussing LGBTQ experiences and issues, especially in first person, is that one might get too self-absorbed and end up passing what’s personal off as the general--thereby hurting (instead of upholding) diversity, a byword of LGBTQ movements. Kailey dodges this trap by being clear about what is and what is not his. And that’s not without being relatable. His insistence on similarities amid differences, for one, makes the book speak even to non-transpeople.

What I find most laudable about Just Add Hormones is what I also consider to be the best evidence of its being relatable: its use of simple language. Throughout the book, Kailey stresses the importance of educational dialogue in making our world a more livable place for transpeople (and the rest of non-heterosexuals, for that matter). Not only does light and unassuming language get the book’s substance right across, it also creates the impression that, contrary to popular belief, transpeople’s lives can be grasped and understood just as possibly as other lives out there.

The order in which the book’s points were organized and presented simulates a transsexual’s journey from the cumbersome, hormone-driven adjustment phases to the rather transcendence/cause-oriented post transition. The first parts open one’s eyes to realities that transpeople have to face every day: DSM’s pathologization of transsexuality (through the manual’s listing down of the category as Gender Identity Disorder or GID), the difficulties of self-identification and social interaction for those who are passing by the so-called Gray Zone, and the ups and downs of taking hormones. There are at least a couple of things to learn from these discussions. First, that transition is more complex and delicate than it is generally understood. One of the hardest parts of transitioning, I realize, is going through adolescence again at the time of adult responsibilities and steeper expectations. I can only wonder how this part can be worsened by gender discrimination and oppression. Another thing to keep in mind is that changes do not happen overnight. Physical and physiological changes (i.e. the effect of injected hormones) take several days. And that’s not even accounting for the emotional and psychological adjustments that go with the changes, which are also changes in themselves.

But transsexual experiences, I believe, comprise only a portion of Just Add Hormones. Way beyond being “An Insider’s Guide to the Transsexual Experience”, the book can be anybody’s guide to understanding the ways by which society and certain social constructs operate, as well as to coming to terms with the incongruence of sexual orientation and gender identity. Kailey’s discussions of society’s puffed up fascination with female breasts and male phallus actually had me rationalizing such fascination to myself. Part of the reason, I believe, has to do with the hype and attention that the media afford the mentioned body parts (through the “ideal bodies” that the said sector disseminates and glorifies). As a media scholar (and occasional practitioner), I can attest to the media industry’s unapologetic nonchalance towards its manufacturing of reductive and alienating ideals. Regrettably, though, media representation issues are shrugged off (in passive acceptance, that is) within the industry just as much as they are lambasted in the academe. It is also important to note that, most of the time, tinkering with representations lies beyond the power of an ordinary media practitioner. Somehow, Kailey was right in pointing a finger to media’s being driven by advertising revenues. No matter how badly certain media practitioners want to cater to the underrepresented (instead of settling with cut-and-dried images or stereotypes), program sponsors are people who are trained not to gamble; in wooing and buying audiences, they’d rather stick with traditional, “tried-and-tested” (but actually dated) methods. Most of them fail to see audiences as critical and dynamic.

Still in regard to the book’s discussion of society: I appreciate how Kailey doesn’t wash his hands clean of qualified subscription or falling victim to the social ideals and norms that he criticizes. By not being self-righteous, he puts into light another unpopular reality: that discrimination and hatred exist even within homo, bi, and trans communities. Akin to this recognition of complexity is his underscoring of diversity and intersectionality-- of LGBTQ’s varied interests and affiliations, and his acknowledgement of gender’s being only one of the possibly incalculable identities out there.

Beyond the realm of the personal, Just Add Hormones’ theoretical strength lies in its presentation of the divide between sexual orientation and gender identity. I believe that anyone who reads the book will eventually get on to asking: why, in the first place, is there a need to reconcile the two? Kailey’s being both gay and trans contributed the most to the effectiveness of the book’s exposition of the SO-GI incongruence. At the risk of seeming naive, I find Kailey’s self-label--“gay transman”--peculiar. This is the first time that I have come across someone who chose to transition without being formerly attracted to the opposite sex. The common notion is that transpeople embark on transitioning to fend off the guilt that same-sex intercourse brings about-- a notion that assumes all transpeople to be hapless slaves of heteronormativity. Just Add Hormones effectively pounds this notion to smithereens.

One thing that struck me was the fact that Kailey chose to transition with the knowledge that, by doing so, he would affirm DSM’s diagnosis of him. It must be awfully tricky, believing that there’s nothing wrong about you but still choosing to undergo something that is professionally considered a “cure”, all because it’s the only way you could become yourself. It’s like pleading not guilty of a crime but still choosing to go to prison. I believe in free will and in having multiple options, but with society’s obsession with “providing diagnoses”, I guess we really don’t have much to choose from, after all. Or better still, I guess everything is really just a matter of perspective.

Despite Kailey’s identity (which struck me as peculiar) and views (which lean towards changing society, doing away with heteronormativity, and the like), I do not see him on the extreme end of radicalism, towards which, I would like to think, my views regarding sex and gender are bent. He believes in a “core personality”, in “similar issues, wants, desires, and dreams”. The way I see it, Kailey stands somewhere between assimilationism and queer, on what I used to regard as a rather “safe” position. But to map out and to sling crap at the stance in question are to miss the point. If there’s one thing that the book makes known, it’s that we really don’t need clear-cut categories and definite answers, if having them meant closing the doors of our understanding. We needn’t confine ourselves within givens, if doing so meant unreasonably negating unpopular labels, and if doing so meant categorically denying the existence of still-unborn possibilities.

[Chloe :D · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a cool book to read. I read it partially out of spite because some people say kids should not know about the existence of transgender people. It was an ok book to read, but some of the terms used are outdated, which is fine because this community is rapidly changing and evolving. I did not really personally connect to the book because they transitioned from female to male and I can never transition to male because I am already male. It was still a fun book though.

I found the fact that the book talked about the theme of misogyny a lot very interesting. They talked a lot about how they were treated differently when they presented as male than when they presented as female. The way they made it a huge theme without overshadowing the main theme of the book, transgender experiences, was great. They also had the authority to talk about male and female experiences because they have experienced both.

I also like how they did not just talk about bad things or just talk about good things. They did a good job of giving a whole overview instead of a very one-sided one. They talked about how cisgender people were often afraid of transgender people in restrooms and how transgender people were also often afraid of using public restrooms. He is able to talk about both sides because he spent decades thinking he was cisgender.

I would recommend this book to anyone that is interested in transgender issues and transgender experiences of adults and wants to see counterarguments being talked about and proved incorrect instead of just being ignored or called dumb without much explanation. The book used a few terms that most people would not know, but there are a lot of definitions at the end of the book, so it should be fine.

[Finlay Games · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was the first transgender memoir l read, just a few months after coming out as trans. It was incredibly affirming for me, to read and older trans males story and to feel less alone for discovering myself late in life.

Matt has such a relatable and genuine writing style and his insights of moving from someone perceived as female to living as male are powerful.

Some of the terminology is dated but that is to be expected for the time it was written. This is such an important book, to see how times have moved and to read an entirely different trans narrative to those of people who come out at a younger age.

[Danni Green · Rating 3 out of 5]

I appreciated reading pieces of the author's story, as I always appreciate reading trans people's tellings of their own stories. It felt frustrating that the author overgeneralizes from his own experience to try to portray a sense of universality to "the trans narrative" which doesn't reflect reality and also served to undermine his telling of his own story.

[David Som · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was one of the first pieces of trans literature I ever read, and to this day it holds a dear place in my heart and memory. In Just Add Hormones, Matt Kailey tells his story of his experience as a trans man and how he has coped with both the good and bad along the way.

[Andrew]

Recommended in Transgender 101: A Simple Guide to a Complex Issue as worth reading.

[Avril · Rating 2 out of 5]

A fairly simplistic book and at this point, quite dated. It's a decent starting ground to learning about trans, in particular a transmasculine experience, it is a introductory read rather than deep dive into gender and masculinity.

[Jitter · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very informative, helped learning on the subject, brought up issues I had never even thought of.

[Adam Hunter · Rating 2 out of 5]

By the end it’s quite repetitive.

[Anna · Rating 4 out of 5]

How arrived: library
Why I picked it up: good title, interest in subject matter
Expectations: anticipated, but only middling expectations
Stars: four

I have to say this was a really interesting book. I would probably recommend it to a book club or something���it creates a lot of great conversations.

In a nutshell, this is a book about transsexuals in America, as written by a female-to-male transsexual. Kailey talks about the process, what it���s like for the individual, what it���s like for the outsider, and what all of this means to society today. I picked Just Add Hormones up because I���ve always been pretty interested in this stuff. My college was full of uber-hippies who smoked pot, didn���t eat animals, and identified as gender-queer. No, that didn���t describe every person there, but a vast majority would have fit into at least one category. New College of Florida, you were the best, but man were we weird. Anyway, I knew three people who were working through gender issues. Two actually made the transition, surgeries etc, while my dance instructor was only beginning when we graduated.

Transsexuality is a difficult thing. I recently discovered the prefix ���cis���, which on Wikipedia is defined as "individuals who have a match between the gender they were assigned at birth, their bodies, and their personal identity", as in cisgendered. Talking about this is disconcerting, because if you are cis, you���ve never really considered being another gender. What makes you decide to be another gender? Kailey talks about his mental state only briefly, and I came away with the idea that it is rude to ask. He covers a lot of ���manners��� issues, a lot of them probably created by ignorance and possibly shock. Fyi, never ask a transgendered person about ���the surgery���. You���d never ask a stranger about their genitals, would you?

I think the best part of this book was that it really focused on making transsexuality not that big a deal. Yes, it got a little repetitive, but Kailey was just trying to drive his point home: transsexuals are actually just people. Some will always straddle the gender issue (ew, pardon the���pun?) but many will try to live as ���normal��� a life as they can���transition and get on with it. Those who choose to come forward as trans to educate other people help create awareness, which makes things easier for everyone.

Kailey brought forward a few interesting issues. My favorite was his description of how his life changed as a man���he could walk down streets at night but he couldn���t coo at babies, for example. One chapter was devoted to the importance of a physical penis. He also mentioned that the transgender community is having trouble getting accepted by the gay community, in some instances! Apparently LGBT wasn���t so much for the T in 2005, when this book was written. They thought the transcommunity would bring down the tone and bring up the crazy, which seems so hypocritical. Just another opportunity to think about how truly other transsexuality is in some ways, even while you are accepting that it is not that other after all.

I liked this book, and it probably marks the beginning of my seeking out books on gender identity. It���s really interesting to think about what constitutes masculinity, femininity, and the whole gender construct, but I never got that far into it because my college courses made it clear that those classes were only for super-outspoken members of the queer community, and I thought I���d be intruding, or subjected to self-righteous speeches, or both.

Matt Kailey makes transsexuality a relateable issue that can be thought about and talked about. I would say the only downside was his regular diversions into musing about why can���t we all just get along, which���beautiful sentiment, but it���s REALLY not going to happen, or at least definitely any time soon, especially when this sort of book needs to be written.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've had great admiration for author Matt Kailey ever since stumbling onto his incredibly informative blog, Tranifesto. He is a gay transman who transitioned from female to male (FTM) in his early 40s and is a thoughtful, pragmatic, and compassionate writer. Although he incorporates some autobiographical material into this book, it's more a collection of chapters on different aspects of the transsexual experience: mind, identity, body, sexuality, and the changes he hopes will come about in society as a whole. He says, "The most beautiful thing about being a transsexual person is being able to experience the world in two genders.... There's a world out there that could mightily benefit from what we have to offer, and that in and of itself might be the reason that we exist."

He admits that a transman (due to the strong influence of testosterone) can generally assimilate more easily into the larger culture than many transwomen (MTF) can. But assimilation--although tempting for personal reasons--doesn't change society for the better. Through this book and via his consulting work, Kailey works to educate others into a greater understanding and acceptance of trans, gay, lesbian, and bisexual civil rights.

For anyone interested in autobiographical information beyond the scope of this book, I'd recommend Kailey's volume of personal essays written after Just Add Hormones, Teeny Weenies: And Other Short Subjects.

[Cole Jack · Rating 3 out of 5]

I respect Matt Kailey and his position as both an educator and trans role model. That said, this book is not his best work. It is worth reading his blog, Tranifesto, and his other books, particularly Teeny Weenies, to see how his positions on trans issues evolve with time. This is an early text for him and it reads that way. Some aspects of it, particularly his defensive assertion that trans men do not have male privilege and, even further, that there really isn't male privilege to be had shows a lack of understanding about the meaning of "privilege."

Overall, the text covers a lot of ground both in the information it provides about Matt's life and trans identities. Unfortunately, by attempting to cover such a broad range of topics in limited space they get only the briefest coverage and often come across as incomplete.

[Elizabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Just Add Hormones: An Insider's Guide to the Transsexual Experience by Matt Kailey

ILL from the library

http://tranifesto.com/category/just-a...

TOC
INTRODUCTION ARE YOU DONE?
PART ONE TRANS MINDS
We're Everywhere
Textbook Transsexuals

PART TWO TRANS IDENTITY
What's in a Name?
The Secret Men's Club

PART THREE TRANS BODIES
Hormones, Glorious Hormones
Flat Busted
Dickless in Denver
The Body Public
A Hypocritical Oath

PART FOUR TRANS SEXUALITY
Sexual Transsexuals
You Say GLB, I Say GLBT
What Does That Make Me?

PART FIVE TRANS PRIDE
A Matter of Choice
Changing the Patterns

PART SIX POST TRANS
A Man in This World
I Do. Can You?
What Now?
A Trans-Friendly World

AFTERWORD
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
TRANS-LATIONS
RESOURCES

[G.R. Lyons · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent read, not just for the trans* community, but for all human beings. Kailey presents a very rational, open-minded approach to the transgender process -- physical, mental, emotional -- and beautifully describes how labels are not just damaging but constricting and unnecessary. Each human being is a unique individual, and should be treated as such, rather than trying to squeeze people into predefined boxes that usually don't truly apply to any one person, let alone a whole group of people. As such, his book spoke eloquently to my libertarian / anarchist philosophy. Also, it helped me feel validated, not just as a gender-nonconforming person, but as a human being in general. We don't need labels to define us for society's convenience. What we need is to live and let live.

[Carrina · Rating 3 out of 5]

Just Add Hormones was very educational and eye opening. I was so glad my Psy of Gender teacher had us read it, it has given me a lot of perspective and insight. This book is pretty much a compilment of stories and opinions that back up Matt's points. He talked about various topics, from his and others reactions to his transition to life as a ftmtrans to taking pride in how you are different and using that to educate the people around you.


If you want transexuals 101 campfire-story-style then read Just Add Hormones. I would recommend it to people who want to know more about transexuality or who are just ignorant.

[Alexei · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oftentimes I read autobiographical works by transmen and think, "I have nothing in common with this guy." More often, I find works by trans authors to be negative in tone, evoking a sense of "I can't help it that I am the way I am. Please feel sorry for me and be nice to me." Matt describes his life with honesty, humor, and integrity. Most of all, he made no apologies for who he is and kept me wanting more.

[Mirrordance · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really appreciated the style and conciseness. Matt Kiley offers a personal outlook on his transition. He describes both his personal experiences and other people ways of differently approaching a transition. In between the lines he also faces a couple of subjects more as feminism and gender roles. Even without being a proper essay or a pamphlet the book is very "political" for what is written and how it is written.

[Shannon T.L. · Rating 3 out of 5]

this book was pretty good. it seemed like it was written mainly for people who might have a friend or partner who was planning on transitioning. it wasn't very in depth and it wasn't super informative. definitely some good stories by the author and he had some really great and helpful things to say, but it was a little to surfacey for me.

[Janelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Matt writes an honest and easy to read book that really helps set the record straight on transition and what the trans experience feels like. Matt's approach is honest and refreshing and offers guidance for everyone, be they trans, trans-ally, family, or just curious. Matt performs a great service to the community and this book is simply stated, worth your time. Thanks Matt!

[Isaac · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a very pleasant read. I read it at a time when I really needed to feel like I wasn't alone in my own gender exploration/issues so perhaps that makes me biased in terms of loving it so much. But I would definitely recommend it to any TMen and their loved ones.

[Linus Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm very tempted to send this to my family when I'm ready to tell them I'm transitioning. It's an interesting and open view of what it's like to transition and the conflicting views and emotions that come about as well as the questions that are often asked of one's self and others.