As women, we are our own worst enemies. I don't know why I continue to read books on feminism and gender equality, when the ending is always the same: women have been oppressed for centuries in a myriad of different ways, every time there seems to be progress, it only comes with more setbacks than opportunities. Fashion and makeup and appearance and the fixation on youth, the idea that a man is a "silver fox" at 60, 70, while women over a certain age (take your pick) better hope they're married to a man who loves them and never leaves them, because they're all but invisible in the public eye once they no longer retain their youthful glow.
Nicholson's book wasn't my favorite that I've read in this genre of nonfiction. It also wasn't the worst. It was just really dry, and not in an academic way where hey, it might be ultra dry, but the knowledge you're gaining as a result of your effort is invaluable.
There are interesting bits scattered throughout this book, starting with the Victorian era and ending around the 1960s with the advent of the bikini, plastic surgery, and crash diets/the desire to be thin. So many of the facts interwoven with personal stories become overly detailed, which is problematic when they're not overly interesting, or even of much value to understanding society and women's role in it.
It is a constant theme throughout the book that no matter what new trend emerges for women, it will inevitably be policed by men (and other women - I don't quite remember if it goes too into detail about the role women play in continuing to keep gender inequality alive and well by repeatedly making snarky, derisive jabs at other women - from their best friends to complete strangers). The tendency for such a large number of women to do this is mind-boggling, and it continues to allow for men to do it. It's annoying as hell.
Sure, I'll insult women and say awful things about them. Just as I will men. However, I do this on an extremely limited basis, and a few of my male friends all agreed that while "I don't think like a man", I certainly "don't think like a woman, either." Apparently I think and act "like a Megan", which was a funny and nice thing to say, I think? Ha. It was when I mentioned to my best friend (who is gay) that "while I'm sure a lot of women are catty and talk trash about women they don't even know, it can't be that bad." This is when I explained that the only women - as well as men - that I'll trash are ones who have made inappropriate or rude comments about me, as well as people who have done really shitty things for no apparent reason and interfered with my life. Even then, though - I don't get into fights with them or bother talking trash to them. I'll just complain to a close friend or two what a complete imbecile they are, then move on. It's bad enough to do in high school, but really, after you're done with that, you maybe have a couple of years to come to the realization that you're no longer a teenager, and that it's rather pathetic to continue to badmouth women on flaws you perceive them to have.
Anyway, I'm rambling, so I'll cut to the chase - when I said this to my friend, that surely it couldn't be that bad, surely I couldn't be one of the only women to not trash talk my friends or complete strangers, he just stopped talking, leveled this stare at me which is his "You're joking, right?" look, then proceeded to ask me that exact question. No, I really wasn't. However, he told me that "as a gay man who has hung out with countless women of all types of professions, all types of personalities... I really can say that you're about the only one I know who doesn't do this at all. Yes, of course many women are worse than others, but it seems as if they all do it to some degree..."
Not that that's in any way a positive thing for me, being the exception. No, I'd much rather prefer to be amongst the rules. I'd certainly hope it wouldn't be very prevalent among my female friends on Goodreads, seeing as how being a voracious reader allows you to have much more important topics and ideas to discuss than what Jenny is wearing today.
It's strange how in this book it starts off with women needing to be completely covered with layers upon layers of garments (corsets, stays, cage crinolines) - constraining them, suffocating them, rather literally - women suffragists of the time mused about "in our current state of dress, how can women possibly ever expect to obtain job equality and equal pay with men?" - and literally, as they had a terribly difficult time getting ready, moving about, and of course, getting undressed. They were just a decorative, shiny object for men to show off. By the end of the book, women are in skimpy, barely there bikinis, putting entirely new sets of constraints upon them, and anxieties for them to contend with. After all, only a certain body type, with measurements of bust, chest, and waist falling into the "appropriate numbers" for what was deemed to be attractive by men, could wear one without feeling self-conscious.
As others have said, and as expected, it is an infuriating read, but that's not why I'm only assigning it three stars. It just lacked any really cohesive or engaging narrative and I didn't find myself being drawn in at all while working my way through it. It felt more like an assignment, I suppose. If I rated all of these books on how infuriating they were, they'd all be one-star reads. For example, these two lovely passages:
p. 50: "Womankind was otherworldly, but she was also domestic, docile, passive. These ideals were absorbed through poetry, but also through advertisements, magazines, art, fashion and fiction. The illusion had to be maintained. Dora Spenlow, Dickens's heroine in David Copperfield, famously exemplifies the female's enchanting delicacy, alongside the fatuity of her existence. Copperfield's child bride (ew) is 'Little Blossom', tiny of stature: a frivolous, elflike baby who bursts into tears over trifles, counts on her fingers, and in due course expires, innocent, incompetent, capricious, and curly-haired to the last... maintaining the distinction between man and woman was not just about fulfilling one's domestic destiny with an adorable child bride; it was about power, fear and control."
p. 378: "However, Gentlemen Prefer Blondes would not pass the Bechdel test - the test, the principles of which were set out in a 1985 comic strip by cartoonist Alison Bechdel, is a measure of the representation of women in fiction. A work passes the test if it has at least two female characters who talk to each other about topics other than men."
Wow, the sad part about this is that it's still true of today's entertainment. It's rare to find fictional written work, television series, or movies in which women don't inevitably stray into gossiping and giggling over the men around them or men in general (as though truly scandalized by every meaningless comment). However, to blame the "patriarchy" is just mere convenience. If we ever desire change, to stop being treated as though we come with an expiration date, then we don't need to "support other women" with bizarre cheerleading and endless barrages of compliments (especially when said women are competing with us in the work place - that's the only time it should be acceptable and encouraged for women to compete with one another). Remember that equality isn't about distinction between the sexes - "I can't believe she created such an ingenious product and now owns a billion dollar business! What a girl boss!" - no, that needs to stop. Equality isn't about constantly obsessing over every step of progress women make, and it certainly isn't about ridiculing men. It's about acting like a normal human being and treating your coworkers the same. With respect, but also as competition, if necessary.
I don't think I can ever do a review for a book on these subjects without interjecting my personal rants. Haha. If it wasn't so blatantly obvious where the change needs to start, perhaps I wouldn't. Anyway, while I can't really say I recommend this book - and I love books relating to fashion AND feminism - I'm sure there are some readers it will appeal to. I just feel like there are better options out there. Laura Bates remains one of my favorite authors on current-day feminism and misogyny.