You Matter More Than You Think: What A Woman Needs to Know about the Difference She Makes

by Leslie Parrott

Am I making a difference? Does my life matter? 'How can I make a difference when some days I can't even find my keys?' asks award-winning author Leslie Parrott. 'I've never been accused of being methodical, orderly, or linear. So when it came to considering my years on this planet, I did so without a sharpened pencil and a pad of paper. Instead, I walked along Discovery Beach just a few minutes from our home in Seattle. 'Strange, though. All I seemed to ever bring home from my walks on the beach were little pieces of sea glass. Finding these random pieces eventually became a fixation. And, strangely, with each piece I collected, I felt a sense of calm. What could this mean? What was I to discover from this unintentional collection?' In this poignant and vulnerable book, Leslie shows you how each hodgepodge piece of your life, no matter how haphazard, represents a part of what you do and who you are. While on the surface none of these pieces may seem to make a terribly dramatic impact, Leslie will show you how they are your life and how when they are collected into a jar---a loving human heart---they become a treasure.

Genres: Christian, Nonfiction, Self Help, Christian Living, Womens

240 pages, Paperback

First published April 7, 2006

About the author

#1 New York Times best-selling authors, Les and Leslie. A husband-and-wife team who not only share the same name, but the same passion for helping others build healthy relationships. In 1991, the Parrotts founded the Center for Relationship Development on the campus of Seattle Pacific University - a groundbreaking program dedicated to teaching the basics of good relationships.

Married in 1984, the Parrotts bring real-life examples to their speaking platform. Their professional training - Leslie as a marriage and family therapist, and Les as a clinical psychologist - ensures a presentation that is grounded, insightful and cutting-edge.

The Parrotts are New York Times #1 Best Selling Authors. Their books include the award-winning Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, Love Talk, Real Relationships, The Parent You Want to Be, The Hour That Matters Most and Crazy Good Sex.

Each year Les and Leslie speak in over 40 cities. Their audiences include a wide array of venues, from churches to Fortune 500 company board rooms. Their books have sold over two million copies in more than two dozen languages.

The Parrotts have been guests on many national TV and radio programs such as CNN, Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, The View with Barbara Walters, NBC Nightly News, and Oprah. Their work has been featured in USA Today and The New York Times.

Visit their website for lots of free resources at www.LesandLeslie.com

Reviews

[Shirley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Just skimmed, but some good points reflecting how women, in particular, often don't realize the impact they are having on the people around them.

[Iva · Rating 5 out of 5]

I happened upon this book a couple of years ago at a local library book sale. I can't even remember why I picked it up. I just know that I did and that it's sat on my shelf for the past two years, or so. It has survived not one, but two book purging. As part of my Reading Challenge this year, I chose this book to read. (I have some fiction books on my list, but most of them are non-fiction. My rationalization: if I'm going to challenge myself to read at least 24 books this year, I don't want to waste my time.)

This book definitely did not waste my time. Dr. Leslie Parrott is a family and marriage counselor who hosts marriage conferences with her husband, Dr. Les Parrott. Dr. Parrott is also a Christian. In this book, she highlights the differences in men and women. Instead of downplaying these differences or elevating them to grandiose levels, she humbly relates these differences as strengths that not only set women apart from their male counterparts, but also serve as unique characteristics that we can use to make a difference in our worlds.

This isn't a "head shrinking" book. It's not a New Age book. It's simply an honest look at how the Creator made women different and what these differences look like in action. Her main focus is love - not self-serving or martyrdom - but love that seeks out those hurting or needing help; those who need encouragement. Love that hurts with friends hurt and rejoices when friends rejoice. "And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love" (1 Cor. 13.13)

[Stevie Ciske · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very simple, easy read but great insight and great questions to ponder for your own life. Parrott ends each short chapter with things to ponder, and if you read it, take the time to process those questions. This book shows each one of us just how much of an impact we make on those around us. It clarifies the myth that you have to do something huge and visibly monumental in order to be a difference maker. These are all the things I'd tell my girlfriends, but don't always believe for myself. So hearing it, pondering it, and praying over it really aided in my heart changing and feeling more confident. I even stepped out and did something bold in response to the book... I can't wait to see what unfolds from that bold step towards a lifelong dream of mine.

[Autumn Gaskins · Rating 3 out of 5]

Grateful for the transparency. I found things to be repetitive at times (which made me feel like they were place fillers), but overall a good read. I was touched by a couple chapters specifically & a prayer was certainly answered in my reading!

[Haley Arzt · Rating 3 out of 5]

#NonfictionNovember

[Donna Marsh · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent pondering questions at the end of each chapter. I liked how Leslie Parrott shared personal stories from her own life.

[Ashley · Rating 3 out of 5]

A lot of biblical references that I wasn't expecting. The information is good, but I think this would be better for some small group discussions.

[Jenny Rose · Rating 4 out of 5]

We are using this book as part of our Bible study materials at our church. What peaked my interest most was how did the author process and deal with the traumatic news: her father, a pastor, had been having an affair and was leaving them for the other woman. While this is what I was curious about, the book focuses on how we make a difference—whether those differences are big, small, or even cause a domino effect. But it isn't just a pep talk reminding us that we do indeed make a difference, she also reminds us not to get so caught up in making a difference for others that we neglect ourselves.

The only thing I didn't like is the way she seemed to devote two chapters to gender differences. I agree men and women are different, but I don't think making an impact should be analyzed according to whether you're a man or woman.

This book shouldn't just be read by someone who is questioning why they are on this earth or what they can do with their life. I think this book is also for the woman who knows what her gifts and talents are and believes she is using them to God's glory. It definitely made me take a second look at how I'm serving where and if there are any changes I should make.

[Laura · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked it from Chapter 12 to the end. She has a great concept that any strength or gift when taken to an extreme can become a weakness.

I got this book because the mom's group at church was using it with her video study. Unfortunately, I was only able to make one of the sessions so I can't comment too much on how they fit together.

I didn't like the section on gender because the sweeping generalizations do a disservice to both men and women who don't fit the typical mold. I would expect a psychology professor to understand that there can be as much variation within a group (i.e. women) as between groups (women vs men).

I think if I had been in the middle of a big life transition or feeling like I was not making a difference this might have moved me or spoken to me more. As someone who is happy with how I'm living my life there wasn't a lot of helpful content. It's an easy, chatty read like meeting a friend at a coffee shop. If that's what you're looking for, go for it! She shares lots of her own personal issues and some of those facing her friends.

[Janet · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a great book. So special to me, as it was a gift from a woman I met at work giving her a pedicure.
She was a Godsend in a tough time in my life. A messenger (as he is so faithful to send us in times of trial and tribulation.) And I was a surprise to her as a Sister in Christ who wouldn't hide her light, even in dark times.
She was unaware we existed in such a City as this :) She came with her husband for a conference and planned to just stay in the room as there "couldn't be anything for a Christian woman who is definitely appointed and anointed to do in a casino... really? :) LOL...We were both so blessed by this obvious SPIRITUAL APPOINTMENT. This book got me through a really rough spot!
Love you Lisa, Still here :) Life is an awesome journey! Still a work in progress.......

[Alissa]

I'm currently reading this with the women's Sunday school class at church. I'm not sure what I think of it yet. On the one hand it's good because it causes us to reflect on the areas of influence in our lives with family, friends, work, etc. On the other hand, it seems like it might be another one of those cases of Christian literature that has it's agenda and then looks for scripture to support the preconceived message or idea. It doesn't necessarily take any scripture out of context or say anything false, rather it makes natural deductions from referenced verses. I suppose that's what makes me more nervous than anything. I'm often critical of this kind of literature, so we'll see. : )

[Grace Salzer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Love the title - a subject only women would want to talk about! Simple to read and there are some great points to ponder. Came away with a new self confidence in the difference I'm making in my seemingly boring, daily activities. Mum has said it's a great one to use in a study group - there have been some great discussions.

[Amy Phelps · Rating 5 out of 5]

i had trouble with this book. I would like to know about the difference I make during my life but this book didn't help me at figure it out. I do undertsand that you don't have to be on a big scale to make a difference but at the same time I don't mentor anyone, counsel anyone, or help out at local shelters so it seems like I'm not making a difference at all.

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

There's really nothing earth-shattering in this book, but there are good reminders throughout. It packs all the things we know but get too busy to remember in one book, and the "ponder this" questions prompt you to stop and think about aspects of your life and influence we don't often reflect upon.

[Lisa Whitney · Rating 4 out of 5]

I truly wish I had done this book in a women's group. There were wonderful quetions to ponder that I did write down in my reading journal, but to have discussed them with friends would have been heavenly! A good read to look inside yourself truly and see that you do make a difference.

[Stacy · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'll give this book 4 stars for the first 6-8 chapters, 2 stars for the remaining chapters; for an average of 3 stars. Most of the points that you need to get from this book were it he first couple of (very good) chapters.

[esther · Rating 5 out of 5]

thought-provoking and extremely practical. this book had me exploring the halls of my mind....areas i didnt want to go over and those i never knew needed a re-visit. i recommend this to any female who intends to impact the world positively.

[Colorado Buck · Rating 5 out of 5]

this was a great read, she has great insight about what modern women need to still hear

[Rachel C · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read this with my Mothers of Young Children Devotional Group.

[Taryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am reading this one for bible study, it's good, but taking a while to get through so I stay with the group.

[Angela]

We are reading this for my Women's group at church. It very good.

[Sheree · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very insperational, good for self-esteem.

[Anna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book for the woman who thinks she isn't making a difference in the world around her. Very encouraging to get us to open our eyes to everyday opportunities to show God's love!

[Leigh Ann · Rating 3 out of 5]

A real, down to earth view of why women should realize that what they do in their day to day lives is really making a difference.

[Covenant Presbyterian Springfield Ohio]

Call Number: 150 PAR

A gift from Traci FOLEY.

Available.

[Lepha Ann]

This is great! Read it at a time when I really needed the encouragement. Shared it with my Sunday School class and had discussions. Highly recommend it!

[Michelle Cortez · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. Based on the female mind, wondering if we are important, we'll, this book lets us know how important we really are. Made me feel good to be a women :)

[Aurelia Savage · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very Encouraging

[Gina · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an uplifting book.