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637 Best Things Anybody Ever Said
"This collection contains some real gems!"
UNITED PRESS INTERNATIONAL
From Golda Meir to Erma Bombeck...from Aldous Huxley to Abbie Hoffman...from Oscar Wilde to W.C. Fields...from Queen Victoria to Mae West...from Aristotle to Idi Amin....here are the 637 best things anybody ever said--on God, Life, Death, Murder, Stupidity, Narcisism, Birth, Youth, Sex, Love, Marriage, Horses, Greeks, Romans, Politics, Literature, Drink, Presidents, and a great deal more.
UNITED PRESS INTERNATIONAL
From Golda Meir to Erma Bombeck...from Aldous Huxley to Abbie Hoffman...from Oscar Wilde to W.C. Fields...from Queen Victoria to Mae West...from Aristotle to Idi Amin....here are the 637 best things anybody ever said--on God, Life, Death, Murder, Stupidity, Narcisism, Birth, Youth, Sex, Love, Marriage, Horses, Greeks, Romans, Politics, Literature, Drink, Presidents, and a great deal more.
- GenresNonfictionReferenceHumor
166 pages, Paperback
First published August 1, 1982
36 people want to read
About the author
Robert Byrne
92 books18 followersRobert Byrne is the author of seven novels, five collections of humorous quotations, seven books on billiards, two anthologies, and an expose of frauds in the literary world. One of his novels, Thrill, was made into NBC’s Monday Night Movie, which aired for the first time on May 20, 1996. Four of his novels were selections of Reader’s Digest Condensed Books and published in many languages. His style is widely praised for its clarity and wit. Byrne’s Standard Book of Pool and Billiards, published in 1978 and expanded in 1998, has sold over 500,000 copies. -byrne.org
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
July 14, 2018
Hehehehehe...
"Only the mediocre are always at their best." - Jean Giraudoux
"In England, there are 60 different religions and only one sauce" - Francesco Caracciolo
"If today was a fish, I'd throw it back." - Bertrand Russell
"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." - Mark Twain
"In the long run, we are all dead." - John Maynard Keynes
"The trouble with born-again Christians is that they are even bigger pains the second time around." - Herb Caen
"A man is known by the company he avoids." - Unknown
"I'm surrounded by people who want to 'know' the universe, when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown." - Woody Allen
"I have a new philosophy. I'm going to dread one day at a time." - Charles Schulz
"Life is like playing a violin in public and learning the instrument as one goes on." - Samuel Butler
"First secure an independent income, then pursue virtue." - Greek saying
"Boy, the things I do for England." - Prince Charles, on sampling snake meat
"All truths are half-truths." - Alfred North Whitehead
"The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory." - Paul Fix
"The writing of more than 75 poems in any fiscal year should be punishable by a fine of $500." - Ed Sanders
"Like all self-made men, he worshipped his creator." - Unknown
"The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy." - Sam Levenson
"Better that a girl has beauty than brains, because boys see better than they think." - Unknown
"Bed is the poor man's opera." - Italian proverb
"Being perfectly well-dressed gives a feeling of tranquility that religion is powerless to bestow." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
"I hate quotations." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
.
"Only the mediocre are always at their best." - Jean Giraudoux
"In England, there are 60 different religions and only one sauce" - Francesco Caracciolo
"If today was a fish, I'd throw it back." - Bertrand Russell
"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." - Mark Twain
"In the long run, we are all dead." - John Maynard Keynes
"The trouble with born-again Christians is that they are even bigger pains the second time around." - Herb Caen
"A man is known by the company he avoids." - Unknown
"I'm surrounded by people who want to 'know' the universe, when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown." - Woody Allen
"I have a new philosophy. I'm going to dread one day at a time." - Charles Schulz
"Life is like playing a violin in public and learning the instrument as one goes on." - Samuel Butler
"First secure an independent income, then pursue virtue." - Greek saying
"Boy, the things I do for England." - Prince Charles, on sampling snake meat
"All truths are half-truths." - Alfred North Whitehead
"The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory." - Paul Fix
"The writing of more than 75 poems in any fiscal year should be punishable by a fine of $500." - Ed Sanders
"Like all self-made men, he worshipped his creator." - Unknown
"The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy." - Sam Levenson
"Better that a girl has beauty than brains, because boys see better than they think." - Unknown
"Bed is the poor man's opera." - Italian proverb
"Being perfectly well-dressed gives a feeling of tranquility that religion is powerless to bestow." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
"I hate quotations." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
.
May 10, 2022
These were definitely not the best things anybody ever said. For the most part neither humorous nor inspirational.
June 2, 2012
“It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.” -James Thurber
“It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis.” –Margaret Bonnano
“Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.” –Unknown
“There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is having lots to do and not doing it.” –John W. Raper
“Howard Hughes was able to afford the luxury of madness, like a man who not only thinks he is Napoleon but hires an army to prove it.” –Ted Morgan
“When it is not necessary to make a decision, it is necessary not to make a decision.” –Lord Falkland
“I never lecture, not because I am shy or a bad speaker, but simply because I detest the sort of people who go to lectures and don’t want to meet them.” –H.L. Mencken
“Better that a girl has beauty than brains because boys see better than they think.” –Unknown
“I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.” –Jackie Mason
“How can one conceive of a two-party system in a country that has over 200 varieties of cheese?” –Charles de Gauelle
“It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis.” –Margaret Bonnano
“Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.” –Unknown
“There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is having lots to do and not doing it.” –John W. Raper
“Howard Hughes was able to afford the luxury of madness, like a man who not only thinks he is Napoleon but hires an army to prove it.” –Ted Morgan
“When it is not necessary to make a decision, it is necessary not to make a decision.” –Lord Falkland
“I never lecture, not because I am shy or a bad speaker, but simply because I detest the sort of people who go to lectures and don’t want to meet them.” –H.L. Mencken
“Better that a girl has beauty than brains because boys see better than they think.” –Unknown
“I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.” –Jackie Mason
“How can one conceive of a two-party system in a country that has over 200 varieties of cheese?” –Charles de Gauelle
September 14, 2018
Quite a good collection of aphorisms, witticisms, wisecracks whatever you call them. Except for the embarrassingly bad ones by Byrne.
August 14, 2016
What an interesting concept--this is a collection of quotes simply because the author wanted to collect quotes. (I'm really not sure this would get published these days [this is from '82], unless the quote-collector was Tina Fey or someone.)
But it is a neat, quick read. Byrne's foreword and explanation are funny and slightly snarky; I was absolutely on board for his quotes because he seems like an interesting dude. And I wasn't disappointed. The quotes (arranged in an order that makes sense to him, not necessarily one that makes sense to us) are generally dry and biting in their humor, which is right up my alley. This is meant to be read like a book rather than consulted like a dictionary, and I really appreciated that. I found some real gems here.
All in all, a great diversion for a lazy afternoon.
But it is a neat, quick read. Byrne's foreword and explanation are funny and slightly snarky; I was absolutely on board for his quotes because he seems like an interesting dude. And I wasn't disappointed. The quotes (arranged in an order that makes sense to him, not necessarily one that makes sense to us) are generally dry and biting in their humor, which is right up my alley. This is meant to be read like a book rather than consulted like a dictionary, and I really appreciated that. I found some real gems here.
All in all, a great diversion for a lazy afternoon.
May 8, 2010
fun, occasionally enlightening, but mostly just fun
June 20, 2011
Lots of quotes
June 2, 2013
Best quote: #231 "There's no thief like a bad book." -- Italian proverb
What kind of egotist includes seven of his own coinages in a collection of the best things anybody ever said?
What kind of egotist includes seven of his own coinages in a collection of the best things anybody ever said?
August 7, 2014
I liked the humor, but Robert Byrne does not even attempt to source his quotations; a deficiency that, to his credit, he attempts to correct in some of the sequels.
January 2, 2015
Of the 637 quotes, probably 68 were witty/clever/insightful. And they were doozies; good enough to make this book worth the time.
July 10, 2009
I was so taken with the concept of the book... I LOVE the genre.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews