This is the real life story of Mary Craig . She has four children where two of her children are mentally handicapped . But how she goes on with her life is what this story is all about. The struggles she face in her life,makes her better. She finds a calling in life, when she goes through dark times.She joins a group, which provides care and shelter to the homeless. It was inspirational.She was committed to her social work,in spite of all her troubles.
Mary Craig's second son, Paul, was born with Hohler's Syndrome, gargoylism. Her greatest fear, a profoundly disabled child, had come to pass. For over a year, his differences were put down in Mary's mind, to his constant crying and difficulty in breathing. But one night, when he was taken to hospital, a young doctor simply said to her, "Of course, you know he is not normal." It was a moment seared in her mind.
So began a time of grief and endless visits to doctors where humiliations were heaped one upon another. Paul didn't ever recognise his own mother but he knew when he was the centre of attention. Doctors, in their excitement of encountering a rare case, were often insensitive and thoughtless.
Even thought she was worn out with caring for Paul, Mary needed another focus. She found it in the Sue Ryder Homes. Sue Ryder had been an SOE agent during the war who had injured her back in parachute training. Impressed by those agents who risked their lives for their country, particularly Poland, she had set about helping them after the war. She'd also cared for the young men who'd been imprisoned as youths and children and taken to a foreign country, used as slave labour then released at war's end into a chaotic alien world, not knowing what had happened to their parents, not knowing the language, completely destitute. To simply survive, they became criminals, their crimes ranging from petty theft to murder. The retribution by authorities was swift and the sentences savage. They were imprisoned once more. Their plight was desperate. Twenty years after the war, now middle-aged, some had still not returned to their families. (p101)
Mary found in the survivors of concentration camps a gratitude for the beauty of life, for simple goodness, that was nowhere else. Suffering had in some way refined them. It was through them that Mary began to come to terms with her deep grief, particularly after her fourth son, Nicholas, was born with mongolism.
Warsaw had suffered more than any other European city during World War II. It was heavily bombed in 1939. Then, by 1943, the Warsaw Ghetto had been almost completely destroyed and nearly every inhabitant either murdered or deported to a concentration camp. In the 1944 Rising, the SS smashed the Resistance forces with unimaginable ferocity. 90% of Warsaw's buildings were destroyed and, during rebuilding, a quarter of a million bodies were found under the rubble. (p69f) Many post-war children in Warsaw were born with rheumatic arthritis. (p93)
Man is born broken. He lives by mending; the grace of God is glue. Eugene O'Neill (p132)
"How can there be a God of love when the world is full of suffering? The very idea is a mockery. So we give ourselves two frightful alternatives: either God is cruel, unjust, without mercy, a super-being who delights in the affliction of his creatures; or there is no God and we are adrift in total absurdity, in uncharted and unchartable seas. It's a classic double-bind, a Catch-22 situation. Heads nobody wins, tails we all lose." (p133)
The first lesson of the camp... it made beasts of some men and saints of others. And the second lesson is that it is hard to predict who will be the saint and who the beast when the time of that trial comes. Only one thing prevailed - strength of character. Cleverness, creativeness, learning, all went down; only real goodness survived. Pierre d'Harcourt (p138)
An unknown prisoner of Ravensbruck wrote the following prayer on a scrap of wrapping paper,left near a dead child: Oh Lord, remember not only the men and women of good will, but also those of ill-will. But do not remember all the suffering they have inflicted on us; remember the fruits we have bought, thanks to this suffering - our comradeship, our loyalty, our humility, our courage, our generosity, the greatness of heart that has grown out of all this, and when they come to judgement, let our the fruits which we have borne be their forgiveness. (p134)
He did not say, 'You shall not be tempest-tossed, you shall not be work-weary, you shall not be discomforted.' He said, 'You shall not be overcome.' Julian of Norwich (p165)
Short but incredibly powerful book exploring the authors experiences and observations regarding suffering. She had two handicapped boys and she spent time volunteering for the Sue Ryder homes which helped post war concentration camp survivors adapt to life after the war. She suggests that there are three stages of suffering and in stage two one is faced with a choice to either drown in self pity or accept your new reality and use it to empower yourself to move forward. Very insightful. I highly recommend.
Very engaging true life story that helps us reconsider the values and challenges involved in taking care of differently-abled children and others less fortunate. Deals with genetic disorders, brokenness in Holocaust survivors, family members, and prejudices of those not less fortunate. Strong food for thought presented in an easy-to-read, short story format. Recommended!
One thing I remember about this book is that you can still be a blessing to others in spite of your own pain/depression. Craig went to help others and in this way was liberated from her personal wounds.