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Confessions of an Average Half-Vampire
Lurking in the nuclei of a few rare human cells is an as-yet unstudied gene. It is a gene that makes the inheritor crave mammal blood and faint in bright sunlight. It is a gene that prevents the bearer from appearing normally in digital or mirror images.
It’s a gene that makes life heck if you’re in junior high and trying to fit in.
Eric Wright is a half-vampire with a problem. Several problems, actually. He can’t tell bloodlust from his rollercoaster adolescent hormones. The cutest girl in first period English wants him to become a vegetarian. And the assistant principal suspends him when he refuses to explain why his skin appears translucent in a school security video.
Then Eric’s non-vampire mom, who’s definitely not telling everything she knows, takes him with her on a business trip. To Scotland, where it never stays sunny for very long. The perfect hang out for a vampire. Or several. If only Eric can find one to talk to before he makes any more stupid mistakes....
It’s a gene that makes life heck if you’re in junior high and trying to fit in.
Eric Wright is a half-vampire with a problem. Several problems, actually. He can’t tell bloodlust from his rollercoaster adolescent hormones. The cutest girl in first period English wants him to become a vegetarian. And the assistant principal suspends him when he refuses to explain why his skin appears translucent in a school security video.
Then Eric’s non-vampire mom, who’s definitely not telling everything she knows, takes him with her on a business trip. To Scotland, where it never stays sunny for very long. The perfect hang out for a vampire. Or several. If only Eric can find one to talk to before he makes any more stupid mistakes....
204 pages, Paperback
First published April 14, 2011
260 people want to read
About the author
Lisa Shafer
5 books51 followersLisa Shafer is a Utah native and a writer of young adult fiction. Her current novels and WsIP all contain elements of the paranormal or urban fantasy, but someday she hopes to branch out into steampunk as well. As she has spent so many years teaching puberty-ridden adolescents, she tends to prefer first person POV in order to use teens' perspectives on the world. Or, possibly, she never really grew up and tends to see the world that way naturally.
When she is not grading her students' papers, reading, or writing, Ms. Shafer enjoys traveling. Her bad habits include staying up way too late at night to read and eating way too much chocolate.
When she is not grading her students' papers, reading, or writing, Ms. Shafer enjoys traveling. Her bad habits include staying up way too late at night to read and eating way too much chocolate.
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Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
April 24, 2012
I really enjoyed this book. It was a really fun and had an interesting twist on the vampire genre. The narrative was young, exciting and personal. This is an extraordinary young man that is finding his way through life and doing a remarkable job (even though he has this affliction). He does not let this aliment get him down. I paticularly enjoyed the details of his visit to Scottland and of the secrets and friend he made while being there. I cannot wait to read the next book. It sounds just as amazing as this one.
thank you
thank you
May 14, 2012
I'll put the summary first: the story is funny, entertaining, and well-written. The story also gets points because it teaches something valuable. And, finally, I read the book three times over the course of a year and each time I was engaged in the story, cared about the characters, and thought the dialogue was fresh and believable.
Now, I am not usually a fan of vampires, but this is not your typical vampire story. In the prologue, Shafer uses the Halloween costume contest as a metaphor for her own story. A Reverend at the party says that a girl's costume is evil because she is dressed as a character from the Harry Potter stories. The girl, however, is portrayed as harmless and guiltless of any malice or evil. So, while some people might think vampires are inherently evil, Ms. Shafer says that vampirism is a medical condition. Just having the condition doesn't make the person evil.
Ok. I want to talk about the grossness factor of this story. I don't mind reading about blood and such. I don't particularly like it, but it doesn't bother me a whole lot. What I did think was gross was in the prologue when Shafer describes a 12-year-old boy trying to eat and talk at the same time. Eeew. But whatever. I'm sure the target audience won't have a problem with that.
Another thing I want to talk about is acceptance. Eric (the half-vampire) has to learn to accept himself for who he is and what he is. That is something most of us can probably relate to. We can sympathize with Eric, cuz we've all gone through (or are going through) the same things.
And we like the kid, too. He's a fairly decent kid who wants to be honest and do the right thing. He's got a good sense of humor, and is pretty snappy with the comebacks. So, as Eric learns to be okay with the fact that he is a vampire, we cheer him on. And we, in turn, see how we might be okay with having a vampire as a friend. Very clever, Ms. Shafer.
P.S. I just remembered another reference in the book that debunks the idea that vampires are evil! You know a book is really good when you see more and more layers of meaning with every reading of the book. I want to go read it again now, and see if I can pick up any more stuff I may have missed the first three times.
Now, I am not usually a fan of vampires, but this is not your typical vampire story. In the prologue, Shafer uses the Halloween costume contest as a metaphor for her own story. A Reverend at the party says that a girl's costume is evil because she is dressed as a character from the Harry Potter stories. The girl, however, is portrayed as harmless and guiltless of any malice or evil. So, while some people might think vampires are inherently evil, Ms. Shafer says that vampirism is a medical condition. Just having the condition doesn't make the person evil.
Ok. I want to talk about the grossness factor of this story. I don't mind reading about blood and such. I don't particularly like it, but it doesn't bother me a whole lot. What I did think was gross was in the prologue when Shafer describes a 12-year-old boy trying to eat and talk at the same time. Eeew. But whatever. I'm sure the target audience won't have a problem with that.
Another thing I want to talk about is acceptance. Eric (the half-vampire) has to learn to accept himself for who he is and what he is. That is something most of us can probably relate to. We can sympathize with Eric, cuz we've all gone through (or are going through) the same things.
And we like the kid, too. He's a fairly decent kid who wants to be honest and do the right thing. He's got a good sense of humor, and is pretty snappy with the comebacks. So, as Eric learns to be okay with the fact that he is a vampire, we cheer him on. And we, in turn, see how we might be okay with having a vampire as a friend. Very clever, Ms. Shafer.
P.S. I just remembered another reference in the book that debunks the idea that vampires are evil! You know a book is really good when you see more and more layers of meaning with every reading of the book. I want to go read it again now, and see if I can pick up any more stuff I may have missed the first three times.
April 12, 2012
Let me start this review by saying that I do not like vampire books. If the title or summary of a book has the word vampire in it I will pass it by and pick up almost anything else instead. I picked this one up anyway and I'm glad that I did. It is written for a young adult audience and is very clean. It deals with normal teenage issues rather than anything gory or violent.
Eric is a 14-year-old boy living with his single mother in small town Utah. He plays the piano, he has a crush on his pretty friend Kacey, he hangs out with his friend Joseph, he can't handle bright sunlight, and has to drink some kind of blood to survive. He and his mother hide his status as a half-vampire by saying he has porphyria, which makes him unable to be out in the heat of the day. He takes a few classes at the public school and the rest on-line.
Of course, adjusting to hormones is difficult for any teenager. Imagine adding in the desire, not only to kiss the pretty girl, but to bite her as well. Eric struggles to rein in his strong desires but doesn't know how to do this. His mom is human and has no experience in this area. His dad left as soon as he found out about the pregnancy and they haven't heard from him since. Eric's journey to learn how to cope with his vampire half takes him to Scotland where he meets some good and evil examples of the vampire world. Some may even try to hunt him down. Overall, it makes for an interesting story.
Shafer handles the vampire element as a genetic abnormality rather than a different species. They are not bloodthirsty in the sense that they want to kill or even need to kill others to survive. They only need a few ounces of blood day to survive. I like this adaptation. I enjoyed this book and will be happily passing it along to my teen and pre-teen children.
Eric is a 14-year-old boy living with his single mother in small town Utah. He plays the piano, he has a crush on his pretty friend Kacey, he hangs out with his friend Joseph, he can't handle bright sunlight, and has to drink some kind of blood to survive. He and his mother hide his status as a half-vampire by saying he has porphyria, which makes him unable to be out in the heat of the day. He takes a few classes at the public school and the rest on-line.
Of course, adjusting to hormones is difficult for any teenager. Imagine adding in the desire, not only to kiss the pretty girl, but to bite her as well. Eric struggles to rein in his strong desires but doesn't know how to do this. His mom is human and has no experience in this area. His dad left as soon as he found out about the pregnancy and they haven't heard from him since. Eric's journey to learn how to cope with his vampire half takes him to Scotland where he meets some good and evil examples of the vampire world. Some may even try to hunt him down. Overall, it makes for an interesting story.
Shafer handles the vampire element as a genetic abnormality rather than a different species. They are not bloodthirsty in the sense that they want to kill or even need to kill others to survive. They only need a few ounces of blood day to survive. I like this adaptation. I enjoyed this book and will be happily passing it along to my teen and pre-teen children.
January 30, 2012
Think you know vampires? You've never met any quite like Eric, the hero of this tale. Most people think of vampires as sinister, cape-clad creatures with pointed fangs, but Eric is pretty much an average kid who goes to school, plays piano...and sneaks over to the neighbor's house to steal sheep blood.
So maybe he's not completely average, and neither is this book. Lisa Shafer is definitely an above-average writer, and the world she's painted is very real and relatable. She completely flips the script on everything we've been told about vampires, breathing new life into what I was convinced was a been-there, done-that subject. I'm happy to be proved wrong, and I'll happily read the next installment in Eric's tale when it's available.
So maybe he's not completely average, and neither is this book. Lisa Shafer is definitely an above-average writer, and the world she's painted is very real and relatable. She completely flips the script on everything we've been told about vampires, breathing new life into what I was convinced was a been-there, done-that subject. I'm happy to be proved wrong, and I'll happily read the next installment in Eric's tale when it's available.
December 4, 2012
I thought this was a great book with all Eric goes through with school, Drama, and Being a vampire (half). I know this teacher she was a teacher at the school i currently go to "Brockbank Jr. high". I was never in any of her classes. she left when I was a seventh grader, and This is one of the books in my opinion: One of those books you don't judge by it's cover!" In my opinion i give this 5 stars. (I'd would of given it 7 if i could of) I was just a good book i reading "michael vay Prisoner of cell 25" Right now! I'll do a review on the sequal to both of them!
Want to read
March 6, 2012Can't wait to read it!! :) It sounds really good!!
October 11, 2012
I think Lisa is a terrific writer. Her characters seem real and she writes with a great sense of humor. My boys have both enjoyed her work.
March 16, 2013
I loved this book. My english teacher actually wrote this book. She has written many and has many more coming. I love her creativity with the characters in her books. Great job, Shafer!(:
December 3, 2022
I am very surprised to note that this was Schaeffers first novel. It is so very good in every single way except one. There were two sentences I would have liked to remove from the book because the narrator expresses, in what is meant to be a humourous way, traditional fat phobia and it really upset me. But apart from those two sentences she really doesn’t miss a beat here. Such a good book. And a good example of how young people can deal with very difficult problems. Loved it.
August 2, 2012
This is a novel aimed at the young adult market, but shouldn't be disregarded by adults. Why? It's good fun.
Eric is a half-vampire. His mum's normal, his dad's a vampire who skipped off when he'd impregnated Eric's mother. Since then, they've had to move several times after he'd bitten various kids and spends part of his life every week taking a syringe to sheep and cows to get some blood.
Being a half-vampire means he has 'gifts', such as being able to calm people and animals by talking in a calm voice, sending them to sleep occasionally, and telekinesis. The last of them comes a great surprise to him. He has a wheelchair-bound friend called Joseph and has the hots for a girl called Kacey. Well not quite the hots, but they do get on well.
Yes, it's full of teen-angst and drama (it's aimed at them remember), such as how do you kiss a girl without sucking her blood at the same time (something he manages) and 'am I gay'. What lifts this out of the ordinary is Eric's attitude. Think Harry Dresden as a youngster, lose the bad language and the killing and you're there.
Eric's mum travels a lot for her job and leaves him alone for several days at a time, but as he's a half-vampire, sensible and strong for his age she doesn't worry too much. One trip, she takes him to Edinburgh where he meets his dad...and wishes he hadn't. His dad turns out to be a drug-addict and the blood Eric sucks leaves him feeling sick for a day or two. On the plus side, he gets to meet another vampire, that his mum fancies, and some acolytes who are happy to let him drink some of their blood.
When he returns home, all hell breaks loose: well alright, I've exaggerated a little, but he does end up in a serious fight with someone who's trying to kill him.
The one thing that kept me reading this book was Eric. He doesn't need much blood, nor does any vampire for that matter, and he explains his need to be indoors as a case of Porphyria. Garlic? Loves it. Crosses? Only when playing football, not that he does play football, but...well you get the idea. In short he's a normal kid that most adults and children would recognise.
I enjoyed the book and found it an entertaining read. For the young reader that it's aimed at, it would make a good Christmas present. Why? One, it's about vampires, two it's available as a digital download from Amazon, three they won't need a Kindle to read it as the Kindle software is available for PC, Mac, iPhone and others for free on Amazon, four it's only 86p.
I'll leave the final few words to my 11 year old son.
"Dad, can you keep reading that to me. It's so funny."
Eric is a half-vampire. His mum's normal, his dad's a vampire who skipped off when he'd impregnated Eric's mother. Since then, they've had to move several times after he'd bitten various kids and spends part of his life every week taking a syringe to sheep and cows to get some blood.
Being a half-vampire means he has 'gifts', such as being able to calm people and animals by talking in a calm voice, sending them to sleep occasionally, and telekinesis. The last of them comes a great surprise to him. He has a wheelchair-bound friend called Joseph and has the hots for a girl called Kacey. Well not quite the hots, but they do get on well.
Yes, it's full of teen-angst and drama (it's aimed at them remember), such as how do you kiss a girl without sucking her blood at the same time (something he manages) and 'am I gay'. What lifts this out of the ordinary is Eric's attitude. Think Harry Dresden as a youngster, lose the bad language and the killing and you're there.
Eric's mum travels a lot for her job and leaves him alone for several days at a time, but as he's a half-vampire, sensible and strong for his age she doesn't worry too much. One trip, she takes him to Edinburgh where he meets his dad...and wishes he hadn't. His dad turns out to be a drug-addict and the blood Eric sucks leaves him feeling sick for a day or two. On the plus side, he gets to meet another vampire, that his mum fancies, and some acolytes who are happy to let him drink some of their blood.
When he returns home, all hell breaks loose: well alright, I've exaggerated a little, but he does end up in a serious fight with someone who's trying to kill him.
The one thing that kept me reading this book was Eric. He doesn't need much blood, nor does any vampire for that matter, and he explains his need to be indoors as a case of Porphyria. Garlic? Loves it. Crosses? Only when playing football, not that he does play football, but...well you get the idea. In short he's a normal kid that most adults and children would recognise.
I enjoyed the book and found it an entertaining read. For the young reader that it's aimed at, it would make a good Christmas present. Why? One, it's about vampires, two it's available as a digital download from Amazon, three they won't need a Kindle to read it as the Kindle software is available for PC, Mac, iPhone and others for free on Amazon, four it's only 86p.
I'll leave the final few words to my 11 year old son.
"Dad, can you keep reading that to me. It's so funny."
May 13, 2012
Confessions of an Average Half-Vampire is an entertaining novel that is perfect for younger readers who want to start reading the paranormal genre.
It all starts with the all-too-lovable main character, Eric Wright. He is not an ordinary teenager, he is a half-vampire trying to find the right place for him in a world that can never accept him. Everything starts to go down hill when he could not control his bloodlust and bit his friend. A very close friend. A girl who wants him to become a vegetarian. With his health getting worse every day, will Eric find someone that could help him without getting killed in the process?
I think this book is perfect for those who are not quite old enough to read the Twilight novels. It has the most interesting range of characters that I'm sure many readers can relate to. Eg: the awkward stage when you don't feel that you fit in, worried about being accepted by friends, etc. The characters will definitely grow on you! And so will their adventures. The book is full of action! Yes, the action is just so....wow....it had my heart racing! You will want to read the sequel as soon as possible.
The book does follow the cliché vampire line: burned by the sun, pale, not showing in mirrors, etc. But I had no problem with that because of the gripping story line! This is definitely a book that I would recommend to young people, like right now!
Overall, I think that this is stunning book with a really exciting plot and humorous dialogue! I can't wait to read more of Lisa's works.
It all starts with the all-too-lovable main character, Eric Wright. He is not an ordinary teenager, he is a half-vampire trying to find the right place for him in a world that can never accept him. Everything starts to go down hill when he could not control his bloodlust and bit his friend. A very close friend. A girl who wants him to become a vegetarian. With his health getting worse every day, will Eric find someone that could help him without getting killed in the process?
I think this book is perfect for those who are not quite old enough to read the Twilight novels. It has the most interesting range of characters that I'm sure many readers can relate to. Eg: the awkward stage when you don't feel that you fit in, worried about being accepted by friends, etc. The characters will definitely grow on you! And so will their adventures. The book is full of action! Yes, the action is just so....wow....it had my heart racing! You will want to read the sequel as soon as possible.
The book does follow the cliché vampire line: burned by the sun, pale, not showing in mirrors, etc. But I had no problem with that because of the gripping story line! This is definitely a book that I would recommend to young people, like right now!
Overall, I think that this is stunning book with a really exciting plot and humorous dialogue! I can't wait to read more of Lisa's works.
February 27, 2012
At first, I thought I wasn’t going to enjoy this book because it took me a while to get into it. It was funny at times and rather enjoyable once I made my brain realize this was geared toward middle school boys. I can see younger boy readers relating to the main character, Eric, very easily. He struggles with hormones and bullies, like almost every middle school child I’ve met. In that way he was believable, even if he was a half-vampire.
Once it got going, the plot was evenly developed. There were a few bullies scattered throughout that added to the conflict nicely. Eric has to deal with not knowing anything about being a vampire, and realizing that knowing his father is not a good thing. He also has to learn an important lesson about standing up to bullies instead of running away from his problems. Isn’t that a lesson that applies to most kids at least once in their lives?
The problems Eric faces throughout the story were resolved by the end of the book without being too sweet and contrite. It has a satisfying ending that doesn’t leave any questions unanswered. I liked that Eric, the main character, learns the value of acceptance and friendship by the end of the book. Confessions of an Average Half-Vampire had several lessons that are relevant to its readers, and that makes this teacher happy.
Once it got going, the plot was evenly developed. There were a few bullies scattered throughout that added to the conflict nicely. Eric has to deal with not knowing anything about being a vampire, and realizing that knowing his father is not a good thing. He also has to learn an important lesson about standing up to bullies instead of running away from his problems. Isn’t that a lesson that applies to most kids at least once in their lives?
The problems Eric faces throughout the story were resolved by the end of the book without being too sweet and contrite. It has a satisfying ending that doesn’t leave any questions unanswered. I liked that Eric, the main character, learns the value of acceptance and friendship by the end of the book. Confessions of an Average Half-Vampire had several lessons that are relevant to its readers, and that makes this teacher happy.
October 15, 2011
Lisa Shafer’s CONFESSIONS OF AN AVERAGE HALF-VAMPIRE is a fun coming-of-age tale perfect for upper middle-grade to lower young adult readers.
Eric Wright is a half-vampire trying to figure out the vampire part of him while keeping it secret from everyone else. Although he would rather be more normal, he struggles to fit in and not bite his fellow classmates. He decides to find another vampire to teach him his vampire ways, but he discovers it might be easier said than done.
CONFESSIONS OF AN AVERAGE HALF-VAMPIRE is a fun story sprinkled in with more serious issues like bullying. Eric is a cool kid, intelligent, thoughtful, a bit quirky. The voice is great for a young teenage boy, even if he rambles a bit too much at times. His friends and enemies are well-written. I love how the vampires are born that way through a genetic trait. Shafer does a wonderful job slowly introducing the other vampires to the plot and letting the reader get used to the world she created.
Overall, I liked reading Lisa Shafer’s CONFESSIONS OF AN AVERAGE HALF-VAMPIRE and look forward to the next book in the series.
Eric Wright is a half-vampire trying to figure out the vampire part of him while keeping it secret from everyone else. Although he would rather be more normal, he struggles to fit in and not bite his fellow classmates. He decides to find another vampire to teach him his vampire ways, but he discovers it might be easier said than done.
CONFESSIONS OF AN AVERAGE HALF-VAMPIRE is a fun story sprinkled in with more serious issues like bullying. Eric is a cool kid, intelligent, thoughtful, a bit quirky. The voice is great for a young teenage boy, even if he rambles a bit too much at times. His friends and enemies are well-written. I love how the vampires are born that way through a genetic trait. Shafer does a wonderful job slowly introducing the other vampires to the plot and letting the reader get used to the world she created.
Overall, I liked reading Lisa Shafer’s CONFESSIONS OF AN AVERAGE HALF-VAMPIRE and look forward to the next book in the series.
May 2, 2012
Not sure what I expected when I purchased this one. Liked the title. Liked the description. If you're expecting urban fantasy or YA urban fantasy, that's a big no-oh. It's more like the trials and tribulations of teen half-vampire angst. Don't get me wrong. It's pretty good for its niche, but I felt like there was a lot left out. Hence, the volume 1 descriptor. That was a hint I missed. For the remainder I must buy volume 2 and thus be fufilled in a literary sense. Good stuff about this book: Good sense of humor. I like the kid. I even like hearing about his tribulations. (Where to get blood? Where's my cred if I bite my date to the prom? How to properly chase down sheep for their blood?) Also it's an indie author and go indies. Not so good stuff about the book: I was left hanging and not in a good way. But hey, it's well written and you can't help but commenserate. (Oh, my spelling.)
May 1, 2012
I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.
This book was slow to start but wound up being pretty likable quite quickly. I like the unique perspective of a middle school boy struggling with hormones and figuring out what being part vampire entails.
I found the HIV bit of the story line totally unnecessary and a bit distracting but that's my only major gripe. The story and characters are likable (Joe's my fav) and it's family friendly enough to recommend to any of my middle school students.
This book was slow to start but wound up being pretty likable quite quickly. I like the unique perspective of a middle school boy struggling with hormones and figuring out what being part vampire entails.
I found the HIV bit of the story line totally unnecessary and a bit distracting but that's my only major gripe. The story and characters are likable (Joe's my fav) and it's family friendly enough to recommend to any of my middle school students.
March 8, 2012
Took a little while to get into it, mainly because I hadn't read a book about middle schoolers in a while and had to adjust to the characters. It definitely picks up though. I read the final 60% in about two days.
August 27, 2012
Of course I like it; I spent years writing and polishing it!
Why don't YOU read it and see what you think of it? :D
Why don't YOU read it and see what you think of it? :D
August 13, 2012
It was fun reading a book where I knew the author personally. It reminded me a lot of my 9th grade year. I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought that school year was awful.
June 23, 2012
Review to follow shortly.
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