How Other Children Learn: What Five Traditional Societies Tell Us about Parenting and Children's Learning

by Cornelius N. Grove

Cornelius Grove explores societies in which classroom instruction plays little or no role in people’s lives: non-industrialized, pre-modern “traditional” societies. His book focuses on these: Aka hunter-gatherers of Africa, Quechua herders of the high Andes, the Navajo of our own Southwest, village Arabs of the Middle East, and Hindu villagers of India. Anthropologists’ accounts of daily life in these societies, and of how young children in each one grow into adulthood, became Grove’s raw material. The result is How Other Children Learn: What Five Traditional Societies Tell Us about Parenting and Children’s Learning (Rowman & Littlefield, which offers a 20% discount with code RLEGEN20).

Some folks might think this book will provide practical new tips for raising their own children. Grove says that’s not its main value. Its value is that we can learn about ourselves – i.e., about Americans’ shared beliefs about good parenting – by looking into the mirror of traditional parenting and noting the contrasts between us and them. Here’s an example: Middle class Americans believe that parents must devote endless amounts of time, effort, and money to raising their youngsters, ensuring 24/7 that they are happy, well-rounded, knowledgeable, sociable, and shielded from every danger. Parents in traditional societies think exactly the opposite! Grove coined this maxim:

“Modern parents parent as much as possible. Traditional parents parent as little as possible.”

The environments in which middle-class Americans live, and in which traditional families live, are different in multiple ways. But parents in both types of society want the same outcome for their offspring: that they will become productive, responsible adults. Comparing how traditional parents try to ensure that outcome, and how we Americans try to ensure it, yields thought-provoking insights. These prompt readers to step back and ponder issues such as (a) to what extent they could limit their tendency to “parent as much as possible”; (b) whether there’s another way to get their children to share family responsibilities; and (c) how effectively their children are learning to be productive adults, given that they rarely observe their parents and other adults completing productive work.

Genres: Nonfiction

278 pages, Paperback

Published March 1, 2023

About the author

Have you ever heard of anyone who’s an “ethnologist”? That’s what I am. Ethnology is a discipline whose practitioners compare the values and ways of life in two or more societies to come up with insights about effective living for the people of those societies, and for others as well. Literally, ethnology means “ethnic group study” (ethnos + ology).

I’m an ethnologist of education. I compare child-rearing and schooling within a variety of societies to gain insights into effective ways of bringing up children to become productive, responsible adults. My principal raw materials are the research findings of anthropologists of childhood and others who explore homes and schools around the world.

Does this all seem too scholarly for you? Please know that I’m determined to write books that are engaging and readily understandable. I actually have friends who read all my draft chapters and point out where I haven’t been 100% clear. And my books are quite short; the longest one (not including appendices, notes, etc.) is only 195 pages. My goal is to make anthropologists’ fascinating and insightful research findings accessible for regular folks.

● THE APTITUDE MYTH . For this book, I relied on the findings of historians. I wanted to know why many Americans came to believe that a child’s grades in school are very largely a reflection of their inborn intelligence (aptitude). 178 text pages. www.theaptitudemyth.info

● THE DRIVE TO LEARN . I was curious why East Asian children are better students than their American peers. I found two reasons. The first is discussed in this book: it’s about how East Asian parents raise their children at home. 116 text pages. www.thedrivetolearn.info.

● A MIRROR FOR AMERICANS . This book discusses the other reason why East Asian children are superior students: it’s about how they are taught in East Asian preschools and primary schools (up to grade 5). 126 text pages. www.amirrorforamericans.info.

● HOW OTHER CHILDREN LEARN . I explore five traditional (pre-modern) societies in which there are few schools or none at all, focusing on how parents enable their offspring to mature into productive, responsible adults. Described is child-raising among African hunter-gatherers, high Andes herders, Navajos of our Southwest, and villagers of the Middle East and of India. 195 text pages. www.howotherchildrenlearn.info.

Reviews

[Linus]

I really look forward to reading this book as a person who is a product of a hybrid of my cultural parenting and the influence of America on my parents as their parented me. When I find interesting is that we find various aspects of outside cultures to be too rough and two traditional, which then dissuades people from looking at what principles drive that type of parenting. However if we can acknowledge the progress that we've made in the US but understand that the base principles of older cultural parentage has value, then I think you would be achieving what the author wants you to get.

For example, you can look at various Asian parenting styles as very harsh, which it most certainly has been historically, but we can also look at how those principles of, say, not introducing individual incentives like money until later would allow for a culture of the collective to grow. The Socratic method of education especially concerning discussions between parents and children are very important and ultimately lead to very successful children. On the other hand, if that approach is taken too far then there are consequences like overt individualism. Coming from the other side where overt communalism can be damaging, we can see what the other side has and most likely we'll find what combination works the best.

I've read similar works to this and I have personal experience, so I'm not reading the book yet because I have not read it but I really do look forward to seeing the explicit demonstration and explanation of various cultures that I do not have experience with but put in the context of American parenting.

All revise for the rating after I read the book and hopefully I get it through Goodreads

[⚫㊐✨Heather Mc Erlean❦㈦㊏ · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cornelius N. Grove's book, "How Other Children Learn: What Five Traditional Societies Tell Us About Parenting and Children's Learning," was a perfect blend of years worth of research into five different traditional tribes (societies) and how they raise their children and how that differs from modern Western families.

Personally, I loved the descriptions of the first two tribes, the Aka and the Quechua, which were my favorites and also the most different from our modern culture. It was scary to think of how they raised their children, but at the same time, I found it inspiring. Much of the Navajo were like those two, but there were some differences. I liked their ways too, but not as much as the first two. Now, the coverage of the Arabs and the Indians was a harder read for me. I think most people growing up in the West might be upset by how the Arabs and Indians raise their kids in many ways. Grove really found a way to make it seem not as disturbing though and actually makes you think about how we parent over here. The question was posed about not raising them either way, but somehow finding a way to integrate both traditional and modern systems to find that balance and asks what that might look like. I love open-ended questions left to the reader to imagine a life with the compromise of two systems that bring about two totally different results.

Grove did an excellent job of compiling information on a subject that is so diverse among these groups. There is a comprehensive list of books and videos in each chapter and at the end of the book. I would say a good portion of the book was charts and lists of where you could do the research for yourself and I encourage everyone to check into those books and videos. I certainly looked into some of them and I will be reading more books on this subject in the future. That is another reason for the 5 stars ... Grove makes you want to read more about this and really think about how we raise our children or even help raise grandchildren. It even helps you to see great benefits in more traditional systems. I love the way the community helps raise a child. It really should take a village and the point is really driven home in Grove's book.

If you are a parent or an expecting parent, this is a great book for you to read to make some important considerations for your child. I wish I had read this book before I had my sons.

[Linda Donohue]

I am not sure why I entered this giveaway but I did win the book. I am going to pass it along to my PhD teacher cousin!