Tell Me a Real Adoption Story

by Betty Jean Lifton, Claire A. Nivola (Illustrator)

The author knows how important it is for adopted children to have a real story and know the truth about their beginnings, because she grew up adopted. Here she shows parents how to honestly answer the questions adopted children ask about themselves. She also tells the warmly satisfying story of one child's adoption.

Genres: Adoption, Childrens

32 pages, Hardcover

First published March 8, 1994

About the author

Betty Jean (BJ) Lifton, PhD, was a writer and adoption counselor, who was one of the leading advocates of adoption reform. She is an authority on the psychology of the adopted child, birth parents, and adoptive parents, as well as the complexity of search and reunion.

Reviews

[Cassidy Goddard]

Tell Me a Real Adoption Story is written by Betty Jean Lifton and illustrated by Claire A. Nivola. I would classify this book as a realistic fiction book. This book was about a young girl and her mother at bedtime, and the girl ask her mother to tell her an adoption story. The mother makes up a story about a king and queen wanting to adopt a baby, but the child gets upset and tells her mother she wants to hear a real adoption story about herself. The mother proceeds to tell the child how they found the girls mother who could not take care of a baby, and they met her at the hospital to meet their new baby. I really liked this story because it involved the birth parents along with the adoptive parents. The adoptive mom was able to tell the daughter about her birth mom, what she looked like, and how she sent pictures of the girl to her birth mother. The problem presented in this story, is when the young girl gets upset when her mother tells her fairy tale adoption stories. The girl wanted to know about where she came from and the truth rather than a made up story. The language was very easy to read, and I think it could be read to students of all ages. The book was a little boring to me, so I could see it getting boring to children. The illustrations in this book were nicely done, but again not much color was used so I think that helped me lose interest in the book as well. This book did not have much cultural diversity presented. The book was about a white man and woman who adopted a white baby. The culture of white Americans was represented throughout the book.

[Alexandra Lecomte · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was read to me as a child as well as read by my self to myself while growing up. It was a very comforting book and still continues to be.
It was my favorite book out of all books pertaining to adoption.
It helps me wrap my head around the fact that I did not come from the mother that was mothering me.... It gave me permission to ask questions and to demand some type of answer.
About 28 years later I realized that the same author wrote the books I would later find comforting and validating of the trauma that adoption brought to me. This was a beautiful and ironic awakening.

[Kelly DiBenedetto · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is for parents and children to share together as they start an open conversation about adoption. In this book, the adopted child asks for a realistic bedtime story, and the adoptive mother responds in the best way that she can about their own, real, personal story.

[Esther · Rating 2 out of 5]

The flow of this book is a little choppy/jilted. There are some parts/pages I don't really care for and then others that I really like a lot. In this story the adoptive parents met the birth mother and shows a little what one form of an open adoption can look like. I really ambivalent about if I will use this book or not for the group because it lacks warmth. Too many books are too positive or too negative when it comes to adoption. This one is potentially in the latter category.

[Kaitlin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nice look at why the truth is important to an adopted child. This particular child was adopted from a birth mother and arrangements were made before the child was born. Parents were present for the birth.