Fight Like a Girl...and Win: Defense Decisions for Women

by Lori Hartman Gervasi

A powerful and practical guide that packs a major punch ... without even throwing one! Self-defense lecturer and no-nonsense author Lori Hartman Gervasi lays out simple actions and important decisions women must make BEFORE they find themselves in physical danger to eliminate surprise and panic.
It's an unfortunate reality that women are susceptible to random acts of aggression, from sexual harassment and stalking to physical assaults, domestic violence, date rape and worse. But women can learn how to protect and defend themselves -- with this groundbreaking guidebook. Let martial arts black belt and accomplished journalist Lori Hartman Gervasi walk you through easy-to-follow, everyday steps for taking charge of your personal safety, training your reflexes, and -- if and when the time comes -- using force. Her program consists of 26 potentially life-saving decisions that every woman must make,
DECIDE TO BELIEVE IN YOUR FIGHT - Battles are waged from the inside out. Your conscience, intelligence, and guts must be committed to the cause. You and those you love are the things worth fighting for.
DECIDE TO DEVISE A STRATEGY - Create a one-way ticket out of every imaginable circumstance, from back-door escape routes to getaways in public places. Think "what-if...?", plan for the unexpected, and be ready for anything!
DECIDE TO RECOGNIZE THE THREAT OF THE INITIAL ATTACK - When practicing awareness, you can detect danger before it happens. The bad guy will take steps to get close to you. Watch carefully and identify these for what they are―the preludes to an attack.
DECIDE TO MOVE - If an attacker strikes, don't freeze―get moving! Break through your fear with instant mobility. You have limitless options and any movement works as long as it leads to your safety.
DECIDE TO ACT ON YOUR INSTINCTS - Your intuition is your guide, but you must respond physically in order to be successful. When something isn't right, take action, change plans, redirect yourself, and control your destiny!
...along with Defense Do's And Don'ts, inspiring "Power Points," and other survival tactics that can help you to be prepared, stay strong, and
FIGHT LIKE A GIRL...AND WIN

Genres: Nonfiction

304 pages, Paperback

First published August 21, 2007

Reviews

[SmarterLilac · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not bad. The author gets points for telling women a) that when women resist attacks by violent people they manage to escape more than half the time and b) to fight back against violence against them.

And boy, does she. Lori Hartman Gervasi encourages a take-no-prisoners approach to defending our lives, which, well, more power to her on that score. Especially since she goes out of her way to note that one reason many women don't fight back is because they have been conditioned to believe it's 'unlady-like' or anti-feminine to defend themselves. Gervasi also mentions that this same conditioning encourages women to be passive about the topic of self-protection from a preventative standpoint. It can take a vigilant and lengthy course to undo that kind of programming. I know that despite my paranoia about others, I rarely think about learning even basic self-defense strategy. Some may be put off by her hard knocks approach, though. Images of having to gouge someone's eyes out to save my life are currently haunting my dreams.

I also have to commend Gervasi for acknowledging reality here about just who commits the bulk of all violent crimes against women: men. 25% of all women will be the victims of sexual assault in their lifetimes and the vast majority of these assaults will be perpetrated by men. I can't tell you how many times I've had sexist dipshits try to tell me that not only am I 'paranoid' for worrying about my safety around male persons, but that pointing out that men still inflict an enormous amount of violence upon women is just 'misanthropic fear mongering.'

However, I think this book is best used as a companion to a formal defense class (or more than one class.) It's difficult to impossible to learn effective self-defense techniques from a dry, printed page (and the author herself admits as much.) Also, I'm just not sure about some of the things Gervasi tells women to do, here--like trying to fight back against an attacker by trying to punch his testicles. I've encountered two self-defense teachers who said specifically that this is not an effective resistance technique for various reasons (can't remember what they were exactly.)

I also like that she makes it crystal clear to readers that the bulk of the ways we protect ourselves must happen before it's 'too late,' and we are in the grip of an attacker. This book has good tips about how to recognize a misogynist, abusive and violent person (like lack of boundaries, obvious lack of respect for women, etc.) It also mentions that (duh) drug and alcohol use are not just unhealthy, they leave us extremely vulnerable. Intoxication, date rape drugs slipped in cocktails and being mentally and physically altered among strangers are actually dangerous behaviors. In college, I became so tired of explaining this to fellow classmates. High risk choices like this may be commonplace, but are also high risk. The best thing about Fight Like a Girl is as a call for women to empower themselves by relinquishing bad habits, either the habit of complacency about our survival, or the habit of laziness about our decisions.

ETA: There were some statistics in here I found shocking WRT sexual assaults--I'm going to try to verify them in real life. Gervasi claims on one page, with her most recent cite being the Violence Policy Center, that only 3% of all reported rapes happen at the end of a knife or a gun. On another page, her stat is 7% (no clear cite for that one.) This seems very low to me, and is another reason I'm less than enthusiastic about this book.

[Sarah Grahamcracker · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is an absolute must- read for anyone. I isn't your typical self defense book, there are no diagrams or specific moves to practice. More importantly, it helps you learn to be aware of possible threatening situations, and gives you strategies for diffusing them or escaping them. Don't be that woman who thinks that nothing bad can ever happen to you. Pick up this book and learn how to defend yourself. I feel strongly about this, because reading this book saved my life. There are not enough stars in the world to recommend this book. Also, if you are a female friend, you will probably get this for christmas. be forewarned =)

[Swikruti Das · Rating 1 out of 5]

I am.not a person who knows self defense but this is one of those books that has put a thought of the need of heightened awareness in me. Good read with some difficult stories.

[Justwinter · Rating 2 out of 5]

Wanted this book to be more useful, but felt it was extremely repetitive--as in, it needed either a better editor or more strict guidelines for content-based, information building chapters, versus rehashing of formerly mentioned topics, just re-presented in alternating chapters.

I'm going to eventually give it another read and see if I was in the wrong head-space for this, but in fact, I feel thus far it's just one more book that seems as though you'll learn a lot from it, but in the end, it just repackages the same basic information several different ways per chapter.

I mean, maybe if you've never ever though about your personal security/safety this would be helpful? I honestly don't know. Didn't do anything for me. Will re-assess in a few months.

[Greg · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not a book if you are looking for physical moves, but it provides an accurate and thorough review of the mental aspects and pre -confrontation decisions a woman needs to consider to keep herself safe.This one is one of the few books I will actually recommend to my women's self defense classes.

[Whitney · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think the book is a good advertisement for women to learn about self-defense. I do think the book by itself isn't as helpful without taking multiple self-defense classes. I recommend reading "The Gift of Fear," that book provides some insights into the criminal mind.

[Jamie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pretty awesome self-defense tips. Plus, I emailed her and she responded, which is always cool.

[Jessica]

On the Active Response Training's recommended reading.