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Alone Together: How Marriage in America Is Changing
Most observers agree that marriage in America has been changing. Some think it is in decline, that the growth of individualism has made it increasingly difficult to achieve satisfying and stable relationships. Others believe that changes, such as increasing gender equality, have made marriage a better arrangement for men as well as women.
Based on two studies of marital quality in America twenty years apart, this book takes a middle view, showing that while the divorce rate has leveled off, spouses are spending less time together―people may be “bowling alone” these days, but married couples are also eating alone. Indeed, the declining social capital of married couples―including the fact that couples have fewer shared friends―combined with the general erosion of community ties in American society has had pervasive, negative effects on marital quality.
At the same time, family income has increased, decision-making equality between husbands and wives is greater, marital conflict and violence have declined, and the norm of lifelong marriage enjoys greater support than ever.
The authors conclude that marriage is an adaptable institution, and in accommodating the vast changes that have occurred in society over the recent past, it has become a less cohesive, yet less confining arrangement.
Based on two studies of marital quality in America twenty years apart, this book takes a middle view, showing that while the divorce rate has leveled off, spouses are spending less time together―people may be “bowling alone” these days, but married couples are also eating alone. Indeed, the declining social capital of married couples―including the fact that couples have fewer shared friends―combined with the general erosion of community ties in American society has had pervasive, negative effects on marital quality.
At the same time, family income has increased, decision-making equality between husbands and wives is greater, marital conflict and violence have declined, and the norm of lifelong marriage enjoys greater support than ever.
The authors conclude that marriage is an adaptable institution, and in accommodating the vast changes that have occurred in society over the recent past, it has become a less cohesive, yet less confining arrangement.
336 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2007
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
August 25, 2008
This is the most comprehensive look at contemporary marriage in America I've seen in a long time. Amato and his research associates compare surveys from 1980 and 2000 to explore marital quality between the two time frames. For anyone interested in the institution of marriage in America, this is a must read. His interpretations are nuanced as there are no simple explanations. I particularly appreciated his use of other dimensions of marital quality beyond reported happiness measures.
I learned that most of America still believes that marriage is a life-long relationship. I am reassured! With the prevalence of second and third marriages, the social reality of serial monogamy may be more normative, but still not valued as the ideal. I learned that the current prevalence of cohabitation as a precursor to marriage continues to get failing marks as a way to evaluate a potential partner. Finally, the extent to which people take such an individualistic approach to marital fulfillment and how that makes these bonds more fragile and tenuous was an eye opener.
This is not a self-help book, but serious research that looks at contemporary issues in marital relationships.
I learned that most of America still believes that marriage is a life-long relationship. I am reassured! With the prevalence of second and third marriages, the social reality of serial monogamy may be more normative, but still not valued as the ideal. I learned that the current prevalence of cohabitation as a precursor to marriage continues to get failing marks as a way to evaluate a potential partner. Finally, the extent to which people take such an individualistic approach to marital fulfillment and how that makes these bonds more fragile and tenuous was an eye opener.
This is not a self-help book, but serious research that looks at contemporary issues in marital relationships.
March 1, 2008
Contemporary look at marriage and family life. I used this in my family class last summer.
February 7, 2010
Very interesting. A lot of good information. But very clinical. Not really geared toward casual reading. However, I enjoyed it. Haven't read anything this rigorous since college.
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews