The Secret X-Men #1

X-Men: One-Shots

by Tini Howard, Francesco Mobili (Illustrator), Leinil Francis Yu (Cover)

SSHHH - IT'S THE X-MEN! When the Shi'ar Empire faces an unexpected threat, they must call upon the X-Men. Team co-captains Sunspot and Cannonball must lead Marrow, Tempo, Forge, Banshee, Strong Guy, Armor, and Boom-Boom on a secret mission to save Empress Xandra. Wait, those aren't the X-Men. Aren't those the mutants who lost the election?

Genres: Comics, Marvel, X Men, Graphic Novels Comics

35 pages, Kindle Edition

First published February 9, 2022

Reviews

[Scratch · Rating 3 out of 5]

1) There is no way Marrow's bone space suit armor could ever actually work in space. Unless, in addition to her secret extra heart power, her bones have hidden oxygen and air pressure generation powers.

2) People need to get over Sunspot's champagne robot from Secret Avengers. It was featured so prominently there, now again here.

3) Deathbird is a hoe. She has already dated at least two X-Men before this, Vulcan and Bishop, and Sunspot seems too young for her anyway. She already has at least 3 children by other fathers (possibly Lifeguard and Slipstream too), and it just feels like this member of the royal family should learn how to settle down.

4) I don't care for "silly" in my comics. But this isn't entirely silly, thankfully.

[Tiag⊗ the Mutant · Rating 1 out of 5]

Here we go again with the Shi'ar storylines, it's always the same damn thing, with the same damn characters, put on some creativity to it, how hard can it be, give me some new characters, new foes, stop recycling the same stories beat for beat, the only mildly interesting thing in this comic are the character interactions, but Forge being in the team makes no sense, he rejected Cyke's offer to join the X-Men, so he could focus on Krakoan tech, but then he agrees to waste time with Beto's side mission, makes no sense to me whatsover.

I think Tini Howard doesn't do a lot of homework when she's writing X-Men books, it shows in a lot of small details, and she has no idea how space works either, a spacesuit made of bone, cmon, that would never work, where would she get the oxygen from, and Banshee could never use his powers in outer space, because sound doesn't travel through it, and the fact that these dumb decisions end up being approved and published in the final comic just proves that Marvel's editorial is basically dead.

[Tanabrus · Rating 2 out of 5]

Non so se siano peggiori gli orrori logici (Marrow che crea una tuta spaziale ossea per uscire dall'astronave? Banshee che apre il portello, esce nello spazio e urla per allontanare gli inseguitori, come se si fosse sporto da un furgone e non si fosse proiettato nello spazio aperto? L'attacco che infrange il vetro dello shuttle, ma con tutta calma le persone presenti escono dalla stanza sigillandola, senza che tutto e tutti vengano attirati all'esterno... solo una leggera perdita d'aria, come una gomma forata?) o il fatto che il tutto sia completamente privo di senso: i precog imperiali vedono un pericolo e non sanno chi della Guardia sia fidato, allora fuggono con l'imperatrice e con Deathbird che richiede i servigi di Roberto e dei suoi X-Men (...). Chiaramente non gli dice dove andare, li fa sudare per farsi trovare, quando la trovano viene rapita da qualche misterioso nemico, con i precog che sapevano ma hanno deciso che andava bene così. E a questo punto cancellano dati sensibili dalle menti dei mutanti e li fanno tornare a casa mentre loro tornano dalla Guardia Imperiale. Che senso c'era in tutto ciò??

Poi che i disegni non mi entusiasmino è solo qualcosa che peggiora ulteriormente la situazione.

[A.J. · Rating 1 out of 5]

I don’t think I have enjoyed a single thing Tini Howard has written. I like these characters a lot, but this was just not it at all. Big miss on all fronts for me personally.

[Mr. Cody · Rating 2 out of 5]

Woof.

[Eric Williamson · Rating 2 out of 5]

Psst! Hey, wanna know a secret??? Uh, No, no, no thanks, please. The Secret X-men should have been kept a secret. That was the worst Sloppy Joe, all mess and no flavor.

Sure, it looks good (+1 star). Yet, I literally felt bad that that lovely art has to accompany such a trainwreck of a narrative. Incoherent, displaced, oddly emotionless and immature (and not in a good way), rambling and unfocused. Burying this secret in the back of the comic bin.

[Lillian Francis · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5*
Liked the team.
Didn’t quite see the point of the story. This is a trial run I’m guessing but if they don’t understand what’s at stake how can they be prepared.
Won’t Sunspot notice his (very creepy and inappropriate) girlfriend is missing?
Love Roberto and Sam’s friendship.

NB Robert is obviously bisexual. Alludes to both Boom Boom and Banshee as being attractive.

[Roman Colombo · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved the character interactions, even if we could have used more, but even for sci-fi, some things made no sense. Marrow's space bone suit? How did it provide oxygen? How did Banshee's scream work in the vacuum of space?

[Stefan Dion Garcia · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love space X-men and I am excited for the series. This feels more like a team book than Howard’s Excalibur, and I enjoyed the characterization.

[A lireza · Rating 1 out of 5]

Yeah, I'm not enjoying Destiny of X

[Ross · Rating 2 out of 5]

Sunspot leads another team....

Why?
(No, really. Why give him another team to run. The character is trash as he's currently being written)

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This feels like a love letter to characters that don't get played with in the 'big books'. There's a REASON this happens. Nobody has a good story for them. This is one of those bad ideas.

Roberto and Sam - Still not acting age appropriate (or even like themselves) since U.S.Avengers
Guido - Hasn't been used properly since early X-Factor (the detective agency years)
Armor - So much potential and they keep throwing her into junk teams
Marrow - Krakoa era Marrow is a wuss compared to Morlock Marrow...or even Weapon X Marrow
Tempo - They try...they try so hard. Still haven't found her stride...(and that helmet? WTF?)
Banshee - Bringing him back from the dead is a good thing, but now he's just directionless
Boom-Boom - Should be the comedy relief, but always with Berto and Sam. Less said, the better
Forge - why not 'Old Man' Forge and play off that. Instead, he has a love of Krakoa tech?

This is just a story about Berto trying to get laid (he has eyes for Deathbird...who has slept with a few X-men previously)

Bonus: Xavier's half-blood Shiar daughter doesn't fuss with the psychic shenanigans she must do.

Hmmm..

[Rick Ray · Rating 2 out of 5]

Sunspot is salty over not getting selected for the X-Men roster following the Hellfire Gala announcements, and so he forms his own X-Men team. With co-captain Cannonball, he rallies Marrow, Strong Guy, Armor, Boom-Boom, Forge, Banshee, Tempo and Marrow on a mission to assist Deathbird and the Shi'ar. The main story was kind of dull, but the team dynamics of the "Secret X-Men" were surprisingly entertaining. I'd read about this team more if it wasn't rehashing stories from Hickman's stretch on New Mutants.

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

This team is so much fun to read!
I comport rely forgot Xandra is the Professor's daughter. Sunspot is a super douche, I don't even find him antics funny. But maybe we'll see some character growth? Because he needs it.

[Mana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ok. Now this is the type of stuff the Xmen should be doing. Helping out galactic issues. Granted they should move Krakoa to Arrako and do it there but beggars can’t be choosers. Good premise to an arc. Wonder if it will ever see its conclusion.

[Doh · Rating 3 out of 5]

Pretty throw away story but I’m into modern day cocky Roberto Costa. I also really liked the art in this issue. Will keep an eye out on Francesco Mobili’s other works.

[Chris · Rating 1 out of 5]

💩💩💩💩

[Burton Olivier · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a cool concept and there's fun stuff here but the whole thing feels half-cocked and slapped together, much like the team, I guess.

[Jason · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.25

[Monika · Rating 3 out of 5]

I did not like the ending. Sunspot deserves better.

[Allaiyah Weyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really like this team, even more than the new X-Men team. I feel almost cheated that this had to be a one-shot instead of the start of a new series. Tini Howard always delivers for me.