Probably Ruby

by Lisa Bird-Wilson

An Indigenous woman adopted by white parents goes in search of her identity in this unforgettable debut novel about family, race, and history.

This is the story of a woman in search of herself, in every sense. When we first meet Ruby, a Métis woman in her thirties, her life is spinning out of control. She’s angling to sleep with her counselor while also rekindling an old relationship she knows will only bring more heartache. But as we soon learn, Ruby’s story is far more complex than even she can imagine.

Given up for adoption as an infant, Ruby is raised by a white couple who understand little of her Indigenous heritage. This is the great mystery that hovers over Ruby’s life—who her people are and how to reconcile what is missing. As the novel spans time and multiple points of view, we meet the people connected to Ruby: her birth parents and grandparents; her adoptive parents; the men and women Ruby has been romantically involved with; a beloved uncle; and Ruby’s children. Taken together, these characters form a kaleidoscope of stories, giving Ruby’s life dignity and meaning.

Probably Ruby is a dazzling novel about a bold, unapologetic woman taking control of her life and story, and marks the debut of a major new voice in Indigenous fiction.

Genres: Fiction, Indigenous, Contemporary, Literary Fiction, Audiobook, Family, Canada

276 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 23, 2020

About the author

Lisa Bird-Wilson is a Métis and nêhiyaw (Cree) writer whose work appears in literary magazines and anthologies across Canada. Her fiction book, Just Pretending (2013), was a finalist for the national Danuta Gleed Literary Award and won four Saskatchewan Book Awards, including 2014 Book of the Year. Her new novel, Probably Ruby, is published in Canada by Doubleday (2021) and in the USA by Hogarth/Random House in spring 2022.

Reviews

[Jasmine · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am so happy with all the indigenous stories written by indigenous people that are being published these days.

Adopted as an infant, Ruby has been on a lifelong quest to find her biological family and establish a connection with her indigenous culture. From birth, Ruby has not had an easy life. From growing up with her mean-spirited adoptive parents to being in unhealthy relationships, and struggling with alcoholism and drug usage, Ruby slowly tries to reconnect with her culture and later, tries to instil these lessons into her own children.

This is mostly told from Ruby’s perspective, but there are a few chapters with different POVs. Each chapter focuses on a different part of Ruby’s life, and not always in chronological order. It was a little confusing at first, but less so as the novel progressed.

This novel accurately shows the effects of intergenerational trauma and what it’s like to be disconnected from one’s culture, people, and language. It also touches on the disastrous effects of residential schools (boarding schools in the US). These are all heavy topics, but hope and optimism shine through this beautiful book as well.

I loved the fact that Cree was interspersed throughout. I haven’t read very many books that have included it before. I myself know a depressingly small amount of Cree. Here are some Cree words found in this book:

Moshom - grandfather
Kohkum - grandmother
Astum - come
Kisciyiniw - old man

If you couldn’t already tell, I adored this novel and will immediately read anything else that Lisa Bird-Wilson chooses to write.

Thank you to Double Day Canada / Penguin Random House Canada for the ARC provided via Netgalley in exchange for my honest opinions.

[Val (pagespoursandpups) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I must admit that I almost DNF'd this one - but I'm so glad I didn't. The story starts out with several very crass sexual situations and I wasn't prepared for that. My advice to other readers is to stick with this story even if that first chapter is so different from what you were expecting.

Ruby is a woman trying to find her way without really knowing her history. Adopted by a white couple who didn't expose her to any of her Metis (Native American) heritage, this story is about her journey to find the pieces of her puzzle that have been missing. I was drawn to this story because I was interested in finding out more about the Indigenous experience. It was critical in reading this book to remind myself to enjoy the journey and not sweat the details. The jumps in time made the reading more challenging and the many short-lived characters who jump in and out of Ruby's life was all part of the intended structure. The addictions, the self-preservation, the generational trauma and the fear of abandonment were sprinkled throughout the book, but always present in Ruby's life. A life fraught with less than stellar decisions and the accompanying consequences.

I found this book to be difficult to read in parts, but also so necessary in understanding a different point of view. Coming to terms with the fact that the story I am reading is presented in a way that the author has chosen to convey his/her truth. Not always in a way that feels cohesive or smooth. This book is full of astute observations about assimilation, belonging, yearning to know where you come from and the overwhelming, and many times unconscious fear of being alone. I believe this story is an important one and was a welcome step in my quest to delve into histories that are so different from my own.

Many thanks to Random House/Hogarth for the ARC to read and review. Pub date: 4.12,22.

[Stitching Ghost · Rating 3 out of 5]

The non-linear storytelling and the switching POVs confused me as to what was happening to whom when way more than necessary and it really got in the way of what this story had to say.

[Kasa Cotugno · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lisa Bird-Wilson, the award winning author of Probably Ruby, shares a history with her character in that she was separated from her tribe to be raised by a white family, this being a misguided practice perpetuated throughout Canada much as it was through Australia. Ruby's story spools out in interlocking episodes, highlighting her lifelong quest for identity. While at first several sequences prove puzzling, the reader is rewarded when all falls into place even if not all questions are answered. In that aspect, Bird-Wilson respects her readership. The writing is, like one of the characters, "...unconventional beauty. Dark. Gutsy. Sweet and spicy all at once." Ruby's determination in her pursuit is fueled by passion. After all, "Ruby wanted what she wanted, because we all should have that chance."

[a.rose]

very torn with this book so i’ve chosen not to rate it. i think the subject matter is SUPER important and in general i think there needs to be more indigenous novels out there. this one especially deals with adoption and belonging, which are themes i closely identify with. that being said, i found the writing style difficult to read because the story jumped in time at multiple different points. the changes were jarring and new characters were introduced almost every single chapter. i also found ruby herself to be a very unlikable character.

[Brent · Rating 1 out of 5]

This review is based on an ARC received from a Goodreads giveaway. I had thought this book would be more focused on Ruby trying to find her birth family and figuring out how to interact with them. The actual story is more of a bizarrely sex-obsessed tale that chaotically bounces back and forth through time, without giving the reader much room to invest in the characters or plot. I'm still not sure what the plot actually was. The chapters focus on different characters as they navigate their unhappy lives in a sort of chronicle of human misery. There also isn't any sort of definitive ending; the book just ends.

[Dna · Rating 1 out of 5]

I'm trying to be nicer about books that don't make me FEEL ANYTHING, so I'll just say this wasn't for me. I love Canadian writers, Indigenous writers...it's my thing. But this book and the protagonist Ruby remain so flat that it's hard to care about the story. I love books that shift between characters' voices and perspectives and time periods, but this one is nowhere near chronological, and is therefore confusing.

There's just a lot of confusion and not enough to care about.

[Alexis · Rating 5 out of 5]

A rare 5 star review from me. I loved this book. It's a novel told in a set of short stories all surrounding Ruby, an Indigenous woman. Lisa Bird-Wilson's writing is very deliberate. Each word is carefully weighted.

Highly recommended.

[Julietta · Rating 5 out of 5]

As those of you who follow me know, I don't do a summary of the books I read, but rather more of a reaction to the book and justification for my rating: in this case 5/5!

"Probably Ruby", Lisa Bird-Wilson's first novel, has just scooted up to the top of my favorites list! I could go on for pages with why, but instead I'm going to focus on one of the very important, hard-hitting themes of this book. It's all tied up with identity. What does it mean for a person to hold (or not hold) their family stories? How can we have high self-worth if we are rejected on the most basic level by those who are supposed to love us from the start? Our nuclear family? What if we don't know where our ancestors are from? What their values and beliefs were? How are we to forge an identity that either aligns to them or rejects them? How can we avoid self-hate?

Outsider or cross-cultural books have always been my favorites because it's only by contrast that we can learn who we are. So, in this book, the central character Ruby is an outsider in many ways. She is adopted by a white family who provides her with no knowledge of her origins, she is Metis which means she is half European and half Indigenous, she is a single mother, etc.

I'm also a product of two different cultures being half Scandinavian and half Sephardic Jew from Bulgaria, so I could relate to that part of Ruby's life. However, the difference is that my mother filled me up to the top with family stories of my ancestors. For one example among many, there was my great great grandfather who was a glass window installer. He would ride a donkey for days to get to the home where the windows were needed, then live with the family until he finished installing the windows. In fact, my mother even wrote and typed the story of her life for her children to keep and treasure.

By contrast, in this book, we ride along back and forth through time with Ruby as she is mistreated, rejected, abused, loved by a series of characters and even by her own self! Of course this results in a lot of self-destructive behavior and allowing others to weaken her. Nonetheless, Ruby's story is not all bleak. Some parts are transcendent or funny and the book ends with hope for the future. The mommy in me is very grateful for the possibility of a better life.

I'm going to keep an eye out for any more novels by Lisa Bird-Wilson. If this is what she does as a debut, I can't even imagine what could come next. Please, just read it and see for yourself if you have the same reaction I did!

[Devon · Rating 3 out of 5]

At times difficult to read in terms of both content and structure (I personally found the timelines extremely hard to follow), I would still recommend that readers give Probably Ruby a chance. Although fictional, this story is extremely timely and acknowledges a piece of the history and experiences of many Indigenous Canadians, both past and present. I hope to read another novel from Lisa Bird-Wilson in the future. This read was informative for me, with several takeaways.

A beautiful book cover!
Thank you NetGalley and Penguin Random House Canada for this ARC.

[Barbara Carter · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love a book where I fall in love as soon as I start reading it.
I’ve become a fan and will read the rest of her books and wait for her next release.

Quotes from the book:

Who the hell ever heard of a British Indian? Whoever heard of an Indian called Ruby Valentine? What the hell were her parents thinking?

In her experience, the people who stressed things the most or the loudest were the first ones to break their own rules.

He made a drunken grab for her crotch, more or less missed.

There were burnt bits of hash over the stove, bits of tinfoil, and two blackened knives wedged in the cold burner rings. She drank from the kitchen tap, looked around for pain meds, found a bottle, took four.


Ruby had enough counselling and therapy in her life to realize, of course, that she was covering up her rejection with anger.

Much later, Grace would read somewhere that girls like her do one of two things. As if an invisible fork in the road forced them to choose without even knowing. Girls like her either found a way to quickly marry and have a baby they could keep — a replacement baby. Or, girls like her never had another baby, as if they understood there was no replacement. As if they recognized the second baby was just that — a second baby. There was still a first, and she was still unaccounted for.

The next day the boys paid penance for the young father’s guilty heart in various forms of abuse

Six months later, when the social worker did a home visit, she was in a hurry. She could see the dark-haired baby was in good shape, had great gain weight, was crawling around on the spotless floor, and, most significantly, was no longer bawling a blue streak. Check, check, check, with the social worker’s pen.

Sometimes laughter is tears imposter.

[Tilly · Rating 4 out of 5]

*ARC received in exchange for an honest review*

I loved the way this story was told; in dreamy fragments, each chapter a snapshot in time focused on a different person who had some sort of relationship with our main character Ruby. Featuring a useful relationship web at the beginning of the book, the narrative jumps through the years, with different perspectives and styles. Through this, the reader begins to piece together who Ruby is, the same way she herself attempts to do over the course of her life; as an Indigenous child adopted by wilfully ignorant white parents, Ruby grows up knowing so little about her heritage but wanting so deeply to know and to belong. This is an ambitious literary structure, but Lisa Bird-Wilson has an effortless style of storytelling and a strong narrative voice that carried the story. Though the narrative was not linear, the cast of characters revolving through this series of short chapters that felt more like short stories, I still felt like I understood Ruby; her trauma, her loss, her needs and wants. It is a short but extremely moving book about identity, about finding your community, and about forging your own path through life.

Thanks to Random House Publishing Group and NetGalley for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review!

[Yasmin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another story by Lisa Bird-Wilson that will draw you right in, completely submerged gasping for me. The only draw back was the story of Joi and Marcy. It felt incomplete to me and the need for more from this part of the story was the greatest gasp for me. It does seem for the next part much was left to the imagination, however, I would like to have known how in the web of Ruby they were woven. There were a few threads that were left tantalising lingering and unknown. Perhaps that is how Ruby felt throughout much of her life and the reader was to be there with her with the lingering unknowns.

[Wayne Inkster · Rating 3 out of 5]

Though the book had an interesting and true-to-life story to tell, it was hard to see this as a cohesive novel, but more of a collection of short stories about the same character, pieced together in random order.

[Karen_RunwrightReads · Rating 4 out of 5]

Probably Ruby is the story of a Métis Cree woman who was given up for adoption as an infant and who seeks out intimacy-creating situations in her adult life, even when they are toxic and trauma-inducing.

I almost DNFed this novel in the first chapter because it felt hyper-sexed (which makes me cringe a little) but reading further into Ruby’s story made me understand why the book starts the way it does. The narrative is very descriptive of time and place and thought, with chapters moving around to follow various people who impact Ruby’s life. We start with adult Ruby in therapy and learn of some of her recent relationships, then we go back in time to see Ruby as an adopted child and how the adults talk to and about her; later, we follow her father on a road trip, and see her mother in a facility being forced to give up her child. All the anecdotes come together to illuminate Ruby’s past and present choices.

Author Lisa Bird-Wilson makes some bold explorations in this book about native history and representation, inviting the reader into a deeper understanding of alcoholism, self inflicted pain, adoption, runaways, forced removal.

Thanks @penguinrandomhouse for the gifted copy. I probably should have read this one earlier but it’s the perfect choice for Native American Heritage month

[Kelsey Darling · Rating 4 out of 5]

What I liked is that the chapters weren’t in chronological order. Also the author’s lens felt very genuine. Sometimes when there’s alcohol abuse in a story, you resent the protagonist - the author creates a picture of judgement, shame, disgust. I didn’t get that here. I liked that there was no resolution. Because there was no one problem or question. There was just Ruby’s life. In all its messiness and different stages.

[Renay Russell · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m surprised by the somewhat lower rating on this book. I found it really engaging - I really liked the character of Ruby and how different chapters were focused on different parts of her life and people in her life. Worth a read!

[Reading_ Tamishly · Rating 4 out of 5]

Haunting and quite disturbing. Not a book for everyone. TW for SA, SH, assault & abandonment.

[Peacejanz · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was looking forward to this book. It is dreary and sad. Ruby is an adopted woman - now in middle age with children - the husband sort of slipped away. Ruby is always with a new best friend. People die, disappear. There are passages that have no meaning and are not tied to Ruby. I read about half of the book, never getting to any Indian/Metis culture or learning anything new. Ruby uses people and they use her back. We never get a good picture of Ruby - she flits from person to person, friends die and that is no big deal, she steals. Ruby is rude, never apologizes, has an instant temper that no one seems to understand.
When I was half finished, I questioned whether I wanted to finish. Ruby is not a pleasant person, so I really did not care for her. I was learning nothing about Metis culture, and I decided I would probably not learn anything by continuing. The book needed a strong editor to get it tied together in a way that a reader can understand. The book deserves a 1 score. I hope others can understand the point of all this rambling.

[Peachie · Rating 1 out of 5]

The dust jacket promises that "Probably Ruby is a dazzling novel about a bold, unapologetic woman taking control of her life and story...", yet Ruby drifts through life doing stupid, unplanned and/or dangerous things. I was tempted to DNF, but figured it was short so I made myself finish.

[J. Robinson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Probably Ruby

Lisa Bird-Wilson

Probably Ruby, Lisa Bird-Wilson’s first novel, opens in 2013, in a scene in which Ruby is in a session with her counsellor, Kal. Ruby says, “I like to be in charge…. I pretend I like watching him jerk off, just so I won’t have to touch him. My commitment level’s kind of low on this one.” And thus, through the candid, direct language the tone and the mood are set. If you’re not comfortable being uncomfortable with such blunt honest narrative then this is your warning. There will be no flinching, no turning away; Bird-Wilson conveys the world Ruby inhabits is conveyed in spare, unvarnished, uncluttered narrative lines. The world we are invited to enter beckons, and it’s a world unfamiliar to many if not most of us. A world we need to know and understand. How rare it is to have a narrative from this perspetive: that of a Cree woman who was adopted at birth, and spends much of her young life flailing, trying to find herself, her identity, her history. All the while she is wearing a “don’t fuck with me expression” on her face that belies her insecurities and fears as she, like us, careens, veers, staggers, jumps from one real or imagined experience to another.
Ruby’s search for herself is not methodical or linear, and the haphazard nature of what might be described as a quest may be challenging to some readers, due to the novel’s unusual approach to time. The book is, in a sense, all over the map, but necessarily so, and the form reflects the content. The resulting integrity is formed by a kind of kaleidoscope, where the fragments shift, alter, and combine to form a whole.
Ruby is born in 1975, but the novel reaches back to 1950 and her biological parents, Johnny, and Rose (married at 18 and six kids later), and spans, intermittently, and elliptically, 1976 to 2018. Recurring imagery, and characters, create the connective tissue.
The world a naïve and initially innocent Ruby explores is filled with threats and challenges as well as the comaraderie found with others she senses are like her. For example, Ruby has a kind of radar for sensing other Indigenous adoptees: she can detect “a blank spot like a slipped stitch in a knitted scarf” and “recognized that spot a mile away. “
As her future and her past unfold, Ruby “lined her tiny nest of mythology with each fragment she picked up, twigs and leaves and bits of string; she hoarded each scrap and built from them what she could. Scavenged a narrative. Accounted for herself. As faulty as it was, as draughty and full of holes. “
Once Ruby has her own children, Aaron and Junior, she “created a mythology for them. Fabricated family. To try and save her kids from the longing she’d felt her whole life. From the weird amensia about something that didn’t happen. From the yearning for something that should have happened, for something she felt in her blood.”
The objectivity in Bird-Wilson’s prose, the directness of her narrative, awakens in the reader a deep compassion, sorrow, sadness for this young woman and others like her, searching for themselves both in themselves and in the world around them.
I myself have been a birth mother, and have written about adoption from my perspective, but I have not before read from the perspective of the baby, the child, the adult who was given up, and about the impact on any adoptee from any background. Nor have I read what compounds and deepens the plight of someone like Ruby: that she is taken not only from her mother, but from her culture, her people, and that impact is permanent.
There is not a climactic arrival in Probably Ruby, there is no “narrative arc” per se. Rather, we are taken backwards, and forwards, sometimes to where we have already been, but with a greater understanding of its significance, of what is in and out of Ruby’s grasp, who can be trusted, who loves her, who is using her. Engage with Ruby: she is feisty, foolish, fucked up, and funny.

[Janet C-B · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a story about Ruby, an indigenous baby who is separated from her tribe and raised by white parents. Ruby is misunderstood. Her parents try to raise her as a white child which leads to many problems with identity and fitting in. As Ruby grows up she makes many bad decisions with serious consequences. Her life is chaotic. It is a tragic story.
I like reading books about indigenous people, written by indigenous authors. They provide me with a unique point of view. The books are enlightening and educational.
With this novel, I surely got the essence of what the author was conveying. I just found it very difficult to follow, because the story jumps around from chapter to chapter. Some of the content is very graphic and there is a lot of crude language.
I struggled with the book. I didn’t really enjoy reading the book, yet I think the content has merit.
Based on my personal reading preferences, I rate it 2 stars.

[Drea · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautifully written book of stories woven together like a quilt - non linear, different points of view make it come together in a way that creates a character, Ruby Valentine, that I’ll carry with me for some time. Generational trauma and treatment of Native Americans color the person of Ruby into a complex, pained, loving, searching, resilient character. At times I held my breath feeling the pain and desperation of Ruby. It broke my heart many, many times knowing Ruby isn’t the exception but rather an all-too common result of trauma. The Indigenous Voice is one that is crucial for our understanding of our own non-indigenous history. I��m so grateful to Hogarth Random House for the copy of this incredible book.

[Kenny · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book, the unwinding of human connection and relationships in such a different way. Such an interesting way to learn someone's whole story and understand how they came to be.

[Andrew · Rating 4 out of 5]

Probably Ruby is told in a mosaic of memories featuring prominent figures throughout protagonist Ruby's life and the integral moments that shape their relationship to her. This includes both her adopted and blood relations, as well as friends and lovers. I felt truly wrapped up in each character's story and ways their lives weave together into Ruby's. Raw, bittersweet, and powerful.

[Shannon · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an incredibly moving story about Ruby, a baby given up for adoption by her Indigenous mother and raised in an unstable home by a white couple. Ruby's life is a series of ups and downs, full of self-harm, alcoholism and unwanted pregnancies. Told in alternating timelines and perspectives this book had so many scenes that brought me to tears, especially the young mothers forced to give up their babies. Lisa Bird-Wilson does an amazing job exploring a person's need to know where they came from and the various ways one can find to cope with deep-seated pain. Ruby is a character I won't soon forget. Highly recommended and excellent on audio!

Favorite quotes:
"The imperative of a mother is to be a 'good mother.' The bad loomed so large and ugly while the good always receded shyly into its own room. Never taking up the same space, never equal, never a one for one trade. More like a thousand good for one bad."

CW: alcoholism, teen pregnancy, adoption, self-harm

[Lara Cowell · Rating 2 out of 5]

I really wanted to like Lisa Bird-Wilson's debut novel, _Probably Ruby_: am always on the lookout for books penned by indigenous/Native American authors concerning identity and the search for self, but ultimately found this book fractured and meandering, with inconsistent pacing and an unlikeable, shallow protagonist. When we first meet Ruby, she's in her thirties: a pansexual single mother of two sons and scam artist suffering from a lifetime of sexual and substance addiction, who's unable to forge any lasting relationships. A half-Native American, born from a Metis father, Leon, who abandoned Ruby's pregnant 15 year old Swedish-American mother, Ruby was raised by a white couple who never addressed their child's sense of alienation and disconnection from her Native roots. The story skips around in time; Bird-Wilson tells her narrative via a series of third-person perspective chapters: the stories document Ruby's childhood, her reunion with her paternal Metis grandparents, unsatisfying dalliances with questionable lovers, as well as the stories of Ruby's family members. I finished this book, but barely, and found the ending weirdly anticlimactic and dissatisfying. Ruby never seems to evolve in any substantial way as a character, or show growing complexity as a character: her dysfunctionality is relentless and ultimately, Bird-Wilson is not able to garner reader sympathy for her protagonist. Thanks to NetGalley for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Hannah · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Ruby, of Metís heritage, is adopted by a judgemental, neurotic white woman as a baby. Her adopted mother taught her that her ethnicity is something to be ashamed of. She grew up lost, confused and lonely.

The book is written in a fragmented style, intentionally meant to represent Ruby's fragile and confused emotional state. Each chapter represents a different relationship in Ruby's life. There are many relationships, each of them damaged and haunted by Ruby's past. There is a looming sadness throughout as we watch Ruby's broken self esteem wreak havock on her life. I particularly enjoyed the chapter about Ruby's birth mother and the light it shines on Ruby's original trauma.

The first chapter begins with some explicit sexual scenes (being told by Ruby to her therapist). This is not at all representative of the rest of the book. There's not as much sexual content after this chapter and it's certainly not a book about therapy so if this isn't 'your thing' don't let it put you off

[Audrey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ruby Valentine is one of those characters who will just stay with you. Told in non linear connected short stories, the reader sees Ruby's life, through her struggles and triumphs, as she grapples with the identity issues that result from being a transracial adoptee. What's also illuminating, are the stories about her birth parents and how Ruby, an Indigenous girl, was placed for adoption with white parents. And, the heartbreak and joy, when Ruby herself, becomes a parent and how she wants to give her kids a more solid identity. For readers of Olive Kitteridge and Lucy Barton, Ruby complex character contains multitudes.

I received an arc from the publisher but all opinions are my own.

[Tamsin Lorraine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Set in Saskatchewan, the heroine of Probably Ruby is a flawed but lovable woman who makes countless mistakes and poor choices in an effort to reconcile the circumstances of her adoption and find redemption through finding her birth family, her place of origin, and by embracing her visible Indigenous heritage.

Her story is told through snapshots of her life, and the lives of her birth parents, connected by the common thread of forgiveness and a desire to come home.