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Mayhem at the Museum
Scientific progress goes splat!
Luther Watson is an anxious boy. His best friend, Paine, assures him that he has no reason to be, but what could Paine know of anxiety? No bipedal wolf capable of disguising itself as a stuffed animal has anything to worry about...especially when the only person who can see him is Luther.
That is, until a field trip to the Smokeland Science Museum introduces him to Miranda Even, the disturbing daughter of an eccentric family of Smokeland locals. Her morbid interest in all the parts of life most others try to ignore soon have the new friends embroiled in a scheme to determine just why, exactly, the science museum's old janitor was so freaked out to be fired without having a chance to clean his office...and as the answer turns out to be far more dangerous than expected, chaos overtakes the science museum, people will die, and--oh, yeah.
A woman-eating wolf is on the loose.
Welcome to Smokeland.
This splatterific romp that asks "What would happen if Calvin & Wednesday Addams met during a field trip to a children's science museum and stumbled upon the janitor's guns?" is meant to be fun and funny as well as horrifying, so if dead kids can't make you laugh under any circumstances, I wouldn't read this if I were you.
Luther Watson is an anxious boy. His best friend, Paine, assures him that he has no reason to be, but what could Paine know of anxiety? No bipedal wolf capable of disguising itself as a stuffed animal has anything to worry about...especially when the only person who can see him is Luther.
That is, until a field trip to the Smokeland Science Museum introduces him to Miranda Even, the disturbing daughter of an eccentric family of Smokeland locals. Her morbid interest in all the parts of life most others try to ignore soon have the new friends embroiled in a scheme to determine just why, exactly, the science museum's old janitor was so freaked out to be fired without having a chance to clean his office...and as the answer turns out to be far more dangerous than expected, chaos overtakes the science museum, people will die, and--oh, yeah.
A woman-eating wolf is on the loose.
Welcome to Smokeland.
This splatterific romp that asks "What would happen if Calvin & Wednesday Addams met during a field trip to a children's science museum and stumbled upon the janitor's guns?" is meant to be fun and funny as well as horrifying, so if dead kids can't make you laugh under any circumstances, I wouldn't read this if I were you.
- GenresHorror
264 pages, Paperback
Published November 19, 2021
1 person is currently reading
45 people want to read
About the author
Regina Watts
93 books224 followersRegina Watts is an an absolute goddess of femdom fiction who loves writing torrid smut about the corruption of innocent girls and boys by wicked, more experienced young ladies and depraved older men--and if those dirty old men get what's coming to them at the hands of those same corrupted youths, even better. From kinky experimentation to twisted taboos, nothing is too extreme for Regina. Check her out on twitter @WritesWatts or follow Painted Blind Publishing's website for more information about her work, whether it's erotic fiction or transgressive literature.
*Author's Note: Pay no attention to my Goodreads genres I noticed they didn't include 'erotica' as a category and got a lil passive aggressive lmao
*Author's Note: Pay no attention to my Goodreads genres I noticed they didn't include 'erotica' as a category and got a lil passive aggressive lmao
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
November 2, 2021
Available on godless.com
https://godless.com/products/mayhem-a...
You know that saying: “You should never meet your heroes.”?
Have you ever thought about it? The famous people you look up to are only human, too. They also have good and bad days, they are also flawed, their shit also stinks and some of them can be down-right assholes. So, it is best to just build them up in your mind and not think about them too much. Because reality SUCKS!!!
Case in point:
Wednesday Addams is a beloved character who have entertained more than one generation with her dry and dark humor. The reality is that she is a full-blown sociopathic bitch with sadistic tendencies, who will be – best case scenario – a serial killer.
Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes) is a boy with a vivid imagination and an imaginary friend to guide him and keep him on the right path. The reality is that he is – if not already, then well on his way to become – a borderline schizophrenic who, instead of forgiveness, deserves medication and therapy.
Hobbes is a lovable, giant imaginary Tiger who looks after his best friend, Calvin. The reality is that he is some kind of anthropomorphic demon thing who is into shapeshifting…and his animal of choice has killer instincts…
Well, this story is not about any of them, directly. But, if you look at it from exactly the right angle (37.426 degrees, to be exact), you can see where the inspiration comes from for Luther, Paine and Miranda. Put them in a science museum, throw some mushrooms and guns into the mix, and you have yourself a perfect Halloween party!
Regina Watts strips away the fluffy part and takes a stroll down the road of the brothers Grimm – she’s become an honorary sister Grimm in this one – to show them that they were way too tame and should have amped up the body count. Woo-hoo!!
I loved everything about this story – it was entertaining as anything you would ever read, if you are into dark humor. Highly recommended for children, ages 3 – 9…;)
https://godless.com/products/mayhem-a...
You know that saying: “You should never meet your heroes.”?
Have you ever thought about it? The famous people you look up to are only human, too. They also have good and bad days, they are also flawed, their shit also stinks and some of them can be down-right assholes. So, it is best to just build them up in your mind and not think about them too much. Because reality SUCKS!!!
Case in point:
Wednesday Addams is a beloved character who have entertained more than one generation with her dry and dark humor. The reality is that she is a full-blown sociopathic bitch with sadistic tendencies, who will be – best case scenario – a serial killer.
Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes) is a boy with a vivid imagination and an imaginary friend to guide him and keep him on the right path. The reality is that he is – if not already, then well on his way to become – a borderline schizophrenic who, instead of forgiveness, deserves medication and therapy.
Hobbes is a lovable, giant imaginary Tiger who looks after his best friend, Calvin. The reality is that he is some kind of anthropomorphic demon thing who is into shapeshifting…and his animal of choice has killer instincts…
Well, this story is not about any of them, directly. But, if you look at it from exactly the right angle (37.426 degrees, to be exact), you can see where the inspiration comes from for Luther, Paine and Miranda. Put them in a science museum, throw some mushrooms and guns into the mix, and you have yourself a perfect Halloween party!
Regina Watts strips away the fluffy part and takes a stroll down the road of the brothers Grimm – she’s become an honorary sister Grimm in this one – to show them that they were way too tame and should have amped up the body count. Woo-hoo!!
I loved everything about this story – it was entertaining as anything you would ever read, if you are into dark humor. Highly recommended for children, ages 3 – 9…;)
November 1, 2021
It is a fun story. Full of action, bloody, gory, and dark humor. I loved it!!!
I hope Regina Watts will write another story with Miranda.
What an interesting little girl!😈
I hope Regina Watts will write another story with Miranda.
What an interesting little girl!😈
December 18, 2021
I had no idea but apparently, I'm a sucker for feel-good, coming-of-age stories like this. Young love, self-discovery, friendship, dead children, psychedelics, dead children, guts and gore, more dead kids . . . yeah, I know, I know . . . it's true. It's in me, it's part of me.
November 19, 2021
Among my best so far 😌 I hope you all agree! Happy release day~
December 12, 2021
Oh man, I don't even know how to review this without sounding like a fan-girl. I'm just gonna go for it.
Squeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! Regina is so good. One of the best out there right now. Seriously. I freakin' looooved this! It's got blood, guns, children, a stuffed but not-so-stuffed wolf!, teachers, psychedelic mushrooms! Literally, everything you could want.
She's got such a fun sense of humor, it had me laughing days after.
This one made my top five this year. Read it!!
Squeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! Regina is so good. One of the best out there right now. Seriously. I freakin' looooved this! It's got blood, guns, children, a stuffed but not-so-stuffed wolf!, teachers, psychedelic mushrooms! Literally, everything you could want.
She's got such a fun sense of humor, it had me laughing days after.
This one made my top five this year. Read it!!
February 27, 2024
Now THIS is some splatterpunk!
I found Mayhem at the Museum thoroughly entertaining. Whether it was all the gore and bullet-flying scenarios, the “imaginary friend” wolf, Paine, or the budding relationship between Miranda and Luther, at any given moment of this book I was enjoying the wild and crazy ride. Watts is funny and a great storyteller. I recommend this one for an enjoyable and hilarious read.
I found Mayhem at the Museum thoroughly entertaining. Whether it was all the gore and bullet-flying scenarios, the “imaginary friend” wolf, Paine, or the budding relationship between Miranda and Luther, at any given moment of this book I was enjoying the wild and crazy ride. Watts is funny and a great storyteller. I recommend this one for an enjoyable and hilarious read.
October 28, 2021
Here’s a sentence I bet you never thought you’d read- I enjoyed this book about two active shooters as they and their wolf tear through a school field trip. This book has some creative freaking kills, and none of them even happen at the hands of the children! Even though the subject matter should have been extremely dark, Watts finds a way to write child killing in a humorous and light hearted way. Crushes get crushed, bullies get beamed, and a few kids get blown to Kingdom Come. Throughout the whole endeavor, somehow the main characters go unscathed and come out on top in the end, just like the TV show characters the two main characters are loosely based off of. I’m a bit biased, seeing as though I eat up everything Regina puts out, but I found this book to be hilarious and entertaining. No matter the genre, Regina Watts puts out fantastic books and this one is no different.
November 1, 2021
CW: Child Death, Gun Violence, Gore, Gross horror
This was such a good book! We follow two young children, Luther and Miranda, while on a field trip to the Museum. Luther has an imaginary friend named Paine, a stuffed wolf who turns out to be real and vicious. They start chaos on their trip when they find automatic weapons.
This is was graphic but a lot of fun! I couldn't stop reading it. If you're looking to get into the splatter punk horror genre, I think this is a good starting point. Available on Godless(dot)com, or on Amazon mid November 2021.
This was such a good book! We follow two young children, Luther and Miranda, while on a field trip to the Museum. Luther has an imaginary friend named Paine, a stuffed wolf who turns out to be real and vicious. They start chaos on their trip when they find automatic weapons.
This is was graphic but a lot of fun! I couldn't stop reading it. If you're looking to get into the splatter punk horror genre, I think this is a good starting point. Available on Godless(dot)com, or on Amazon mid November 2021.
February 8, 2023
Luther is a misfit boy. He doesn't get along with his classmates, especially because he insists on bringing his stuffed wolf, named Paine, everywhere all the time. On a field trip to the local science museum, he meets an odd but intelligent girl his age named Miranda, a daughter of an eccentric rich family. To Luther's surprise, Miranda is one of the few people who can see Paine is really alive and not just a stuffed animal. When both wander away from their class groups, they discover a bag of guns in the janitor's closet.
Watts's novel is a mixture of parody, Splatterpunk, and a little bit of fantasy. Luther and Paine are obvious stand-ins for Calvin and Hobbes and Miranda is one for Wednesday Addams. There are also references to other characters from Calvin and Hobbes and The Addams Family.
There are differences. Luther is much meeker and less prone to flights of fantasy than Calvin, Paine is much more aggressive and is explicitly alive in more than just Luther's imagination, and Miranda is more malevolent than most interpretations of Wednesday Addams.
For a book with as goofy a premise as this, you'd think most of the violence would be cartoony. There are certainly aspects of that, but some of the violence is actually pretty brutal. There's a scene towards the beginning where the museum janitor, having abandoned his plan to shoot up the museum, tries to commit suicide. He accidently spills acid in his face and ends up dying very slowly that way. I actually cringed pretty hard (in a good way) at this.
The book is a good time. While not quite weird enough to be bizarro proper, it reminds me of the energy of proto-bizarro horror books. It's creative, over the top, and just plain fun to read. It moves fast and has a lot of entertaining action.
Understanding all the things the book references isn't necessary, it's just a nice bonus for a bloody story of kids in a fucked up situation. I definitely recommend picking this up if you're looking for a cracked up thriller. While I've known Watts for some time, this is the first full book of hers I've read, and I'm looking forward to more.
Watts's novel is a mixture of parody, Splatterpunk, and a little bit of fantasy. Luther and Paine are obvious stand-ins for Calvin and Hobbes and Miranda is one for Wednesday Addams. There are also references to other characters from Calvin and Hobbes and The Addams Family.
There are differences. Luther is much meeker and less prone to flights of fantasy than Calvin, Paine is much more aggressive and is explicitly alive in more than just Luther's imagination, and Miranda is more malevolent than most interpretations of Wednesday Addams.
For a book with as goofy a premise as this, you'd think most of the violence would be cartoony. There are certainly aspects of that, but some of the violence is actually pretty brutal. There's a scene towards the beginning where the museum janitor, having abandoned his plan to shoot up the museum, tries to commit suicide. He accidently spills acid in his face and ends up dying very slowly that way. I actually cringed pretty hard (in a good way) at this.
The book is a good time. While not quite weird enough to be bizarro proper, it reminds me of the energy of proto-bizarro horror books. It's creative, over the top, and just plain fun to read. It moves fast and has a lot of entertaining action.
Understanding all the things the book references isn't necessary, it's just a nice bonus for a bloody story of kids in a fucked up situation. I definitely recommend picking this up if you're looking for a cracked up thriller. While I've known Watts for some time, this is the first full book of hers I've read, and I'm looking forward to more.
April 28, 2022
Very entertaining coming of age story with very dark humour, this is great escapism...I absolutely flew through the book to see what happened next. What a fantastic imagination, I will absolutely look to read more by Regina Watts.
June 11, 2022
Brutal Horror Satire
Photo courtesy of http://www.goodreads.com
Mayhem at the Museum by Regina Watts is a very well written book, but not one that is for everyone. I personally found myself a bit disturbed by the content due to the recent school shootings that have been occurring. I even spoke with Regina in regards to my concern, and she made a good point. Is content such as this ever a “good” time? The simple answer is no. However, I do not believe that censoring a book for content is right whatsoever, and I decided to persevere. I am happy I did because Watts is a very talented author.
Mayhem at the Museum centers around a grade school boy named Luther, and his “imaginary friend” Paine the wolf. No one can see his friend though, and it appears to everyone else as a stuffed animal. That is until Luther meets Miranda.
Miranda is a special kind of screwed up, and not in a good way. She is a psychopath. When she lets Luther in on the fact that she can see Paine they become friends. This is a friendship that Luther will surely regret.
Both of the children, along with Paine, get into a lot of trouble, killing, and mayhem. Mainly due to Miranda. Will Luther and Miranda pay for their wrongdoings? Will they get caught? Or will they get off with a slap on the wrist?
Overall, I felt that Mayhem at the Museum by Regina Watts was very well written, a well driven story, and somewhat entertaining. I was put off by a lot of the segments involving the seven year olds with guns. It did not bode well with me, and my wife had an active shooter alert on her campus where she teaches just the other day. This is a fear I live with every day. Therefore, I have to address that elephant in the room. This books is NOT for your average horror reader, and I am not put off very easily. Bring children or animals into the mix and it can disturb me quite a lot.
All in all, I give Mayhem at the Museum by Regina Watts four wolf paws out of five. I only deducted one star due to the fact that I didn’t like the ending. Yes, it is a personal preference, but I did leave the content out of my determination. Otherwise, the outcome may have been different. I highly suggest those who are sensitive to shy away from this book. It bothered me badly, and I am a seasoned horror novel reader. Until next time, my friends.
Written by Andy C. on 06/11/2022
Photo courtesy of http://www.goodreads.com
Mayhem at the Museum by Regina Watts is a very well written book, but not one that is for everyone. I personally found myself a bit disturbed by the content due to the recent school shootings that have been occurring. I even spoke with Regina in regards to my concern, and she made a good point. Is content such as this ever a “good” time? The simple answer is no. However, I do not believe that censoring a book for content is right whatsoever, and I decided to persevere. I am happy I did because Watts is a very talented author.
Mayhem at the Museum centers around a grade school boy named Luther, and his “imaginary friend” Paine the wolf. No one can see his friend though, and it appears to everyone else as a stuffed animal. That is until Luther meets Miranda.
Miranda is a special kind of screwed up, and not in a good way. She is a psychopath. When she lets Luther in on the fact that she can see Paine they become friends. This is a friendship that Luther will surely regret.
Both of the children, along with Paine, get into a lot of trouble, killing, and mayhem. Mainly due to Miranda. Will Luther and Miranda pay for their wrongdoings? Will they get caught? Or will they get off with a slap on the wrist?
Overall, I felt that Mayhem at the Museum by Regina Watts was very well written, a well driven story, and somewhat entertaining. I was put off by a lot of the segments involving the seven year olds with guns. It did not bode well with me, and my wife had an active shooter alert on her campus where she teaches just the other day. This is a fear I live with every day. Therefore, I have to address that elephant in the room. This books is NOT for your average horror reader, and I am not put off very easily. Bring children or animals into the mix and it can disturb me quite a lot.
All in all, I give Mayhem at the Museum by Regina Watts four wolf paws out of five. I only deducted one star due to the fact that I didn’t like the ending. Yes, it is a personal preference, but I did leave the content out of my determination. Otherwise, the outcome may have been different. I highly suggest those who are sensitive to shy away from this book. It bothered me badly, and I am a seasoned horror novel reader. Until next time, my friends.
Written by Andy C. on 06/11/2022
August 7, 2022
i euthanize animals for a living and even that is a more enjoyable experience than this book was
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews