Holding On: Impulses to Leave and Strategies to Stay

by S. Michael Wilcox

When surrounded by faith-shaking fears—impulses to leave the restored gospel—how do we find the strength to HOLD ON?

We may not have certainty in all things, but we can hold on to those truths we do believe. And when honest doubts come or impulses to leave tempt us, we can be prepared. In this book author S. Michael Wilcox shares six strategies to cope with these challenges and help us grow our faith in the gospel of Jesus Christ. Drawing on his own personal faith journey as well as lessons from scripture, history, and literature, Holding On is an insightful, honest, and empatetic conversation about faith and doubt. The messages in this book urge us to hold onto faith, center the essentials, resist the impulses to leave—and stay.

Genres: Religion, Nonfiction, Church, Faith, Spirituality, Inspirational, Audiobook

88 pages, Kindle Edition

Published April 26, 2021

About the author

S. Michael Wilcox is an instructor at the institute of religion adjacent to the University of Utah. A frequent speaker at Brigham Young University Education Week, Michael also conducts tours of the Holy Land, Church history sites, Europe, China, and Central America. He received a bachelor’s degree in English literature from Brigham Young University, a master’s in media from the University of Arizona, and his Ph.D. from the University of Colorado in educational philosophy. He is the author of House of Glory and When Your Prayers Seem Unanswered.

Reviews

[Haley · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought there were so many great points, ideas, and reminders in this book! Some thoughts that stayed with me:

Find those life-altering moments, talks, doctrines, truths, people, and words whose beauty inspire and lift and balance the scales.

Draw strength from the chain that links and welds you to your ancestors knowing you will face them some day.

Center the essentials--faith and family.

Perhaps instead of saying, "I know the church is true," we should say, "I know the church is living."

If wrestling with the question, "Is it true?" perhaps it is helpful to set that question aside for a season and instead ask, "Is the church good?" This second question focuses us on the fruits of faith.

[Colleen · Rating 3 out of 5]

There were some interesting points, and it felt like Wilcox was coming from a place of kindness. It felt like there was a lot of generalization when talking about the reasons people walk away. As another reviewer said, "There are as many reasons to leave as there are people who have left," and I think we have to be careful in our assumptions that box reasons for leaving into comfortable corners that don't require our own reflection.

[Michelegg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Perfection

[James Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

Leaving? Read this book first.

I use ratings to decide which books I am going to buy, and I recently decided I am partially responsible for inflating the ratings on books. Either they were 5 star or 1 star. I decided to use the star rating more objectively as follows:
★★★★★ Great book! Can’t wait to read it again (and I will).
★★★★☆ Good book. I am glad I read this.
★★★☆☆ OK book. Nothing special but not bad.
★★☆☆☆ Not good. Why did I waste my time?
★☆☆☆☆ Lousy. I didn’t finish.

[Heather · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a short, but helpful book that reminds us to hold on to our faith in God and our Savior. Keep them at the center. Commune with God. Share with Him your challenges and questions. Trust in His goodness. Hold on. Celebrate the good and forgive the rest. Find strength from faithful ancestors. Pass on the gifts. Remember that the church is living, it's growing and changing, and the people in it aren't perfect. Don't be upset about something from years ago that those living it weren't. We're here on earth to learn patience and humility and trust in God. As we serve and love and come unto Christ, we may not know all the answers, but He will help us. We can look for His hand in our lives.

There are many recent helpful words from living prophets about finding and staying on the covenant path. I feel like this book goes along with many of those teachings and is an example of someone pressing forward in faith on the path and inviting others to come along. What a blessing to be able to help each other along the way.

Here are some quotes I liked:

"Faith is a growing thing... faith centers on Jesus (p. 2)."

"Sometimes we have to pray through the darkness before the pillar of light appears (p. 9)."

"'How long?'... 'Hold on thy way' (Doctrine and Covenants 121:1-2, 9; p. 10)."

"Living by faith requires patience (p. 10)."

"Live by whatever tiny lips of faith we have. Like the ibex, we need nutrition--spiritual nutrients that are found in 'high places.' We 'hold on' until the path widens... it always does (p. 11)."

"'Fear not, little flock, do good... Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not' (Doctrine and Covenants 6:34, 36; p. 15)."

"I have wept with those genuinely wounded by the insensitivity and misjudgments of others. It saddens me. I know of personal family members' questionings. I love all these dear people. Though our friendships continue strong, I miss the communion of fuller shared believing and am grateful when their commitment to Christ remains constant even when their affiliation with the Church I love is fading or has ended. I believe in their goodness... Indeed, it is our loss of them and their gifts... that pains me most (p. 16)."

"We are granted many 'I knows,' but the 'I believes,' the 'I trusts,' the 'I hopes', and even the 'I supposes' must not be discounted as displaying a lack of faith (p. 19)."

"The greatness of God is His ability to do so much with the 'yous' and 'mes' of the world. His work is individual, not collective (p. 20)."

"Sometimes it is my heart that tells my brain, 'You just have to trust me on this.' And sometimes it is my mind that calms the heart and reasons away the fears. Did not Jesus ask us to serve Him with all of our hearts and minds (p. 21)?"

"The impulses to leave are not new (p. 23)."

"'Why do ye teach this people that there shall be no Christ, to interrupt their rejoicings?' (Alma 30:22, p. 24)"

"'We'll put it in the Lord's hands, and all will be well.' I envied her. My gifts were different, as may be yours (p. 26)."

"Remember past experiences and the spiritually defining moments of our lives. Remembering is one of God's greatest spiritual gifts (p. 32)."

"'Joseph, my son, they sins are forgiven thee' were the first words he heard... 'My soul was filled with love, and for many days I could rejoice with great joy'... The Restoration began with mercy that is offered to all obscure boys and girls (p. 34)."

"One constant relationship of my life endures--the one with a Father in Heaven who listens and answers and forgives (p. 35)."

"Little touches of love!... Touches of love come frequently within temple walls--with the encouragement to connect with ancestors, we may feel love beyond the veil (p. 36)."

"If God gave me only this memory, I would have lived a fulfilled life--more than compensated for all the gratitude, service, and obedience I could offer in return (p. 37)."

"Place his words on your scale of faith and see if their weight and power do not overbalance the criticisms heaped upon him (p. 43)."

"Regardless of how you feel or what the outcome may eventually be, don't allow the explaining and examining of what you are leaving go undone, unbalanced, or unremembered when deciding whether to leave or 'be not moved' (p. 50)."

"'Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?' (Matthew 18:33, p. 53)"

"Celebrate the good--forgive all the rest (p. 53)!"

"Remember the good, with grace to forgive all else (p. 55)!"

"'Forgive and move on (p. 56)!'"

"He was rebuked and corrected and forgiven. Yet God used him, and he rose to remarkable heights (p. 61)."

"We worship a forgiving God, a forgetting God... In this way, we follow Him (p. 62)!"

"'I shall ever look upon... the Savior's goodness with wonder and thanksgiving while I am permitted to tarry; and in those mansions where perfection dwells and sin never comes. I hope to adore in that day which shall never cease' (Oliver Cowdery, p. 62)."

"Unfortunately there is a tendency in human beings to see things through the mirror dust, focusing on negative qualities rather than positive. We need to replace the devil's mirror with God's mirror, which diminishes the ugly and the negative while enhancing the beautiful and positive. I'm confident our Father in Heaven sees us this way. We needn't deny that people, as well as organizations or even books of scripture, have weaknesses or failings (p. 67)."

"'Condemn me not because of mine imperfection, neither my father, because of his imperfection, neither them who have written before him; but rather give thanks unto God that he hath made manifest unto you our imperfections, that ye may learn to be more wise than we have been' (Mormon 9:31, p. 69)."

"Learn! Gratitude instead of critique! Education rather than repudiation! As growing people, we hope others will not continually scrutinize us through the mirror's negative augmenting power (p. 69)."

"Line upon line, precept upon precept, we grow as individuals and as a church. God knows that His children--if they are sincere; if they are trying; if they want to do right and think right--will prevail in time (p. 69)."

"I admit, sometimes when general conference is over, I get a little down on myself. There seems so much to do and be, and I fall short so often. We look at other Saints who appear much further along the straight and narrow path and higher on the ladder, climbing to heaven. We turn our mirror-dusted eyes onto ourselves (p. 73)."

"The tree of knowledge of good and evil is there so we can experience both the positives and the negatives of life. We taste both. We have the gift of our shortcomings, inadequacies, deficiencies, and faults, which allow us to grow... we may need our human frailties to learn godliness (p. 77)."

"Let us love much. Let not our own weakness interrupt our rejoicing in Christ and signal the impulses to leave, believing we will feel more comfortable with expectations that are not so difficult to attain. We have a yearning, hungering-and-thirsting-after-righteousness religion, but we worship a forgiving, understanding, and mercifully forgetting God. We turn outward. We learn humility. We learn to love God and Christ more deeply (p. 79)."

"Their sincere desires, intentions, plans, goals, and changes centered on pleasing the Lord and strengthening the Saints (p. 80)."

"My forebearers looking to the link where I was standing could see themselves in me as could my children looking back up the chain. I was in them. They were in me. We were one 'whole and complete and perfect union,' welded together. That moment in the temple was profound (p. 84)."

"'Draw strength from us!'... 'Don't break the chain! Pass on the gifts and the goodness!'... My father-heart turns to the children (p. 85)."

"I wonder what they knew. What experiences, what moments with the Spirit instilled in them enduring courage and conviction?... There may have been times they doubted their faith. I have often wondered and pondered how they held on and remained such committed Church members. I love them for their examples and continually draw strength from them. They were stayers!... They chose for me! God bless them for it (p. 88)!"

"'Your faith is so shaken just reading about our lives? About the prophets we followed--Joseph and Brigham? We lived it and didn't walk (p. 89)!'"

"All of us... share the heritage of those early Saints who sacrificed so much to give us all we enjoy both temporally and spiritually... How would I answer them if I gave in to the impulses to leave (p. 90)?"

"We too can counter dangers, the impulses to leave, by centering the essentials--faith and family (p. 96)."

"Sometimes distractions, from present movements to personal preferences, shift into the center of our lives and attention, with belief sidelined or rejected altogether (p. 100)."

"Charity for all! There is room under the gospel tent for disagreements and diversities of opinion without uprooting the center and abandoning goodness, truth, and doctrines upon which we share common ground (p. 103)."

"'What is the center now? Will it hold the orbit of my life (p. 104)?'"

"The phrase in the Doctrine and Covenants is actually 'true and living church' (Doctrine and Covenants 1:30). Living is a grand word! It suggests growth, change, adaptation, movement, correction, and increasing maturity. It suggests the quickening presence of the Spirit. The word is a perfect reflection of just what the Church has done over the years. It grows (p. 105)!"

"Faith in the center is living faith (p. 105)."

"Alma drops the word true and relies on the word good to describe how one knows God is in the growing seed... Goodness was the means of perceiving God's presence--goodness reveals truth (p. 105)."

"'Try to love your fellow human beings actively and untiringly. In the degree to which you succeed in that love, you will also be convinced of God's existence (p. 107).'"

"We are not just examining goodness but acting it out, creating it through love, and with the creation, faith in God follows. Goodness and faith are bound together in the center. Sometimes it is best to lay aside wrestlings, doubts, minute examination of beliefs, or the people who espouse them and just serve, just love, just forgive, just practice goodness and see it in others. I believe that is what 'come unto Christ' means (p. 107)."

"By placing our Savior, the gospel, goodness, the Church, and family as essentials in the center, we find a wonderful arena in which to 'do thy work' (p. 108)."

"If the challenge is doubting the existence of Him to whom one is talking, keep the conversation alive even if it feels one-sided. That is all we can do. We then leave it in God's hands to help us feel His reality (p. 110)."

"During the intervening time I talked about it all with my Father in Heaven. Those conversations and my mother's faith were the constants of my life (p. 111)."

"Really communing in a deeply personal and honest way with our Father in Heaven eases the impulses to leave and walk away. As long as those conversations continue; as long as we talk about our difficulties, doubts, questions, offenses, fears, disillusionments, and even embitterment--as long as we persist in speaking with a listening God, we can keep loved and cherished beliefs in the center (p. 111)."

"'Feel after God--to search after a knowledge of his character, perfections and attributes, until they became extensively acquainted with him, and not only commune with him and behold his glory, but be partakers of his power and stand in his presence (Joseph Smith, p. 112).'"

"Often I hear the eternal Michael Wilcox's voice entreating the mortal Michael to fight the impulses to leave. That eternal Michael is so very much wiser than the mortal one (p. 119)."

"I want God and my Savior at the center of my life (p. 119)."

[Nancy · Rating 3 out of 5]

From what I am seeing in the reviews, most of these 4 and 5 star ratings are left by people who are NOT having impulses to leave, so may not be the best judge of how helpful this book is to someone who Is having those thoughts.

I have a 'rule' for buying piano/organ books or cookbooks: if there are at least 2 or 3 pieces/recipes that I know I will use repeatedly, it is worth the purchase. I feel a similar kind of thought about this book: 2 or three ideas that might be helpful in the long run make it at least worth the read.

Feelings about faith and questions and how you react to someone's 'advice/help' are so individual. I am guessing there are things in here that might be helpful and comforting to a broad group of individuals, each relating to a different section. I have come to realize that we just do not know what will help someone. And that includes me.

As with so many books/addresses/persuasions like this, Wilcox is working from a belief that the reader has a basic, if shaky, belief in GOD - the LDS version - and in the gospel as taught in the church. I am always surprised at that.

I liked how it begins with this: "Faith is a growing thing. ......life's droughts, weeds, and wildfires interrupt the growing. If these are not challenging enough, there are loggers who come to deliberately cut it down."

There were things in here that were a complete turn-off to me, things that were neither good nor bad, and a couple that felt encouraging.

Complete turn-offs:
-in chapter 3 "Balance the Scale", I was liking what was being said until he veered off and started talking about forgiveness. While it made sense in the context of the story he was relating, it was a big slap and negative in the context of this book. It felt like he was saying there is forgiveness for having questions, for wavering. Is forgiveness needed for being human? For struggling? Yikes. It negated all the good that I felt was there. Which was interesting when I got to the "Celebrate the Good - Forgive All the Rest" chapter... And where he states (in ch 2) "Questioning and facing doubts are not condemnable wrongs. In the long run they often bring greater conviction."
-chapter 6 "Draw Strength from the Chain" addresses legacy and what we receive and can draw from our ancestors and what we can give to our posterity. Some good things in here. My disappointment was in the thought that we have to stay in the gospel fold in order to pass on any good gift we have. That is completely wrong. There are an awful lot of people without the gospel who pass on an awful lot of good gifts to their children. And if we are talking about 'gospel gifts', if I were to 'leave' at this point in life, my children have been born in the covenant and received all that I could give them in the gospel sense already and that would not be lost - only the 'endure to the end' idea would not be seen in me. (Not saying I'm leaving.) There was an element of shaming, even though he actually writes "I do not think they would want me to feel shame in my decision." And goes right on with "YET, [my emphasis] I sense there would be an ache in their souls." Use of the term "stayers" and "All I want is 100 percent." which was his mother's request of her children, grandchildren. and great-grandchildren. So, no to this.
-in general, while I thought he was being kind and candid and thoughtful, it still felt a little glib sometimes when talking about the reasons people walk away. There are as many reasons to leave as there are people who have left. I am seeing more clearly how the set statements miss the mark, even if only by a fraction, and it makes it hard to feel seen and understood.

What felt helpful to me:
-chapter 3 again, talks about 'remembering' which is a powerful tool. And he talks about The Second Fear: "If the 'First Fear' is the distress brought about by questions, faith-shaking, or interrupting, the second fear is a lack of desire or effort to balance the scale with all the positives...Failure to Examine All the Rest.
-chapter 5 "Wash Out the Mirror Dust" uses Hans Christian Anderson's The Snow Queen tale about the devil's mirror that distorts good and evil. I heard Wilcox use this in a lecture just last summer. It's an amazing story.
-in chapter 7 "Centering the Essentials": "If wrestling with the question 'Is it true?' it may be helpful to put that question on the shelf for a season and simply ask, 'Is it good?'" He talks about keeping what is essential to you in the center of your thinking and holding on. This quote from a young woman: "The less I am made to feel I need to conform to a certain mold, the more I am willing to stay. I will never be a geometric shape!"

I liked how he said that sometimes he 'eliminates' other expressions or words that we often use to see how he would replace them and how that gives added definition and understanding. Words like atonement and prayer and true.

Overall, this might be beneficial to someone looking for reasons to hang on while they grow through a faith journey. For me, the message was hit and miss, maybe more miss for the truly struggling questioner.

I have attended a couple of Michael Wilcox's lectures at BYU Education Week and have liked them a lot. I have loved the spirit of this man that I have felt. This book carries a bit of that.

I actually have the hard copy which is 121 pages.

[Heather Moulton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a great read. I think it has insight and encouragement applicable to anyone - no matter their spot on the gospel journey. I love when someone can share insight that is simple and clear and helpful.

[Nicole · Rating 3 out of 5]

Helpful read with good points but overall it was not what I was hoping for. It goes shallow in too many topics instead of deep in a couple.

[Melissa · Rating 2 out of 5]

I had a hard time finishing this. The idea of the book is great, there is one or two parts that had me perked up and thinking that was a great thought, but I didn't think much of it was very useful for me. I'm not struggling with church doctrine, but I did want to read this and know his thoughts. Is somebody was struggling with the church doctrine, I think this book would do well. He's able to talk about holding on and not talk about any topic in general, but apply basic truth to all these troubling things some members have problems with. Not a great read for me, but I could see being a great read for others

[Nolan · Rating 5 out of 5]

In terms of attendance and even devotion to a specific faith, America’s churches are in serious trouble, and all of them, including the one I attend, are scrambling to stop the hemorrhaging of attendees. The pandemic with its closed churches didn’t help, but the attendance slide was underway before the pandemic.

While it’s true that Wilcox targets this book to members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, the reality is that issues in faith happens to anyone of any denomination during a lifetime. Wilcox presents six strategies designed to help someone struggling with faith hold on and stay rather than give into the impulse to leave.

In the first chapter, using examples from his own life and observances of others, he points out the value of just holding on through a storm or difficulty. He observes the ability of mountain sheep to cling to 90-degree slopes without falling, and he says before we give up on faith and walk away, we should try holding on through the hardest part of the path. He asserts that paths eventually widen, and slopes get less precipitous.

In the second chapter, he analyzes what he calls the “impulses to leave.” He points out that faith is more like a tree than a stone. In this case, the soil is the teachings of Jesus. Just as a tree experiences blight or disease or the vicissitudes of storms, so trees of faith experience similar reshaping and changes. He points to imperfections in church leaders both now and historically as a reason many walk away from their faith. But he asserts you can both admit to the annoying gnats in your eyes while still observing glorious vistas ahead. Wilcox wisely points out that impulses to leave are as old as civilization itself. He references times when disciples turned away from Jesus (John chapter six) and when people refused to follow Moses choosing instead to worship a golden calf.

He says there are numerous causes of impulses to leave. Again, referencing faith as a tree, he writes of loggers who deliberately seek to cut down faith in others. Faith shakers are those who plant fears within us that cause doubt to creep in. Interrupters to our rejoicings are those who seek to block those ineffable feelings of peace within that leads to confidence in spiritual things.

In chapter three, he lists the first strategy to overcome the impulse to leave. He urges his readers to balance the scale. This involves recalling a positive experience with spirituality and faith in a moment when the scale has dipped in the other direction. If all we do is dwell on the dip toward doubt, failing to balance it with memories of moments when spirituality was at a high point, we endanger ourselves by dwelling on the impulses to leave.

Chapter four looks at the extreme value of forgiving those around us for their imperfections. It’s too easy to take potshots at leaders in history or those who currently preside over congregations. Wilcox insists we’re better off to recognize those imperfections when we see them, then promptly forgive all the rest.

Another chapter focuses on the value of ancestors and grandchildren and the idea that we are part of a vast chain of linked people who can help tip the scales in favor of faith rather than doubt.

There are lots of references to Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints scriptures which means this is less impactful for those not familiar with those books. But I found his strategies helpful, and I thought of family members and others whom I wish had read this before they decided to walk away.

[Kristin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really like Michael Wilcox and the perspectives he brings to the gospel. He shares beautiful truths in his messages. This book felt like a message from my grandfather about how important the church is. He offers several good points about the good of the church and why staying is better than leaving. The point that most resonated with me was about balancing the scale. Often times when we find something negative about the church (or anything) there are ten other negative things that follow. Wilcox recommends weighing the good with the bad and suggests that there is much more good with the church than the opposite.

I would suggest this book for someone who is feeling disenchanted about the church or wants to buoy themselves from future trials of faith or church attendance. I think there may be books more suited for those who have fundamental issues with church doctrine or history but want to find a way to stay committed.

Overall this book is beautifully written and feels like a warm hug for those struggling to stay.

[McKay · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. It applies beautifully to what we as a ward family are working on with so many individuals…especially with our youth. Unfortunately, I think that Covid played a large factor in a lot of the issues we are facing and I so wish all in our ward had this book in their hands and were studying its teachings during those difficult months of isolation and no church meetings. Regardless, moving forward I am more committed than ever to Hold On and not break the chain. Thank you Brother Wilcox.

[D. Kim · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this twice so far. It has opened my mind on the challenges faced by those who choose to leave the gospel or church based on their experiences , perspective, feelings associated with a wide variety of events and teachings by the present and past leaders of the church. I particularly like the way the author provided a process or approach to addressing these issues and wrongs that did happened in church history and in the present day. "He suggest six strategies to cope with these challenges and help us grow our faith in the gospel of Jesus Christ."

[Josh · Rating 4 out of 5]

We have all cooked up ideas in our minds of how life should go. As long as I keep the commandments and follow the Gospel God will be there and help us along. Sounds easy but when faced by real life we often find the opposite. We are faced with the reality we often become overwhelmed and find it hard to cling to the principles that we have been taught. Often times we feel as if we are in fact clinging with all we have. Many even fall by the wayside of life. This book provides tools to help us in our journey and to continue to hold on even when it longer seems prudent to do so.

[Tiffany Dominguez · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love Wilcox’s books. He’s a tender, emotional and effective writer in conveying beautiful truths and lessons he’s learned.

In this case, he discusses why it’s important to stay and how we can remain happy in spite of the turbulent times as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Holding On to certain truths and mercies from God. He is not judgement but entirely compassionate about the struggle to stay. Highly recommend.

[Cmswright · Rating 3 out of 5]

A short book, but enjoyable to read. If I could give it 3.5 stars, I would. I enjoyed it, but for me, it didn't contain any earth-shattering ideas on holding on that I hadn't already heard or thought of, thus, the 3 rating. Well-written and perhaps a great resource for others. I did not read this on a Kindle, but had the actual book. I'm wondering if I would have enjoyed it more on tape or in-person.

[Karen Duvall · Rating 4 out of 5]

As someone who has struggled on more than one occasion with toes gripping the edge, I bring myself back to where my center is - Jesus Christ.

Of course, all will have a very different journey. I appreciated his personal experiences and struggles with various topics that he shares.

Would recommend to anyone looking for comfort. For someone who's been in their "arena" at one point in time, or looking to understand why someone would question, or go on a QUEST to find their personal truths.

[Vivienne · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed listening to S. Michael Wilcox read this book. I think that added to his sincere intent to offer hope to those that might feel hopeless in the church and who are questioning to not stay. I can't speak for others who may be struggling in their faith, but I thought he offered some good suggestions for "Holding On." It was interesting his two regrets at the end of the book, that at the time seemed to him like something to let go of, and yet years later you see the error of doing so.

[Cameron · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the most meaningful books about spirituality that I have ever read. It is full of kind wisdom and experiences. I recently read most of another book that was full of antagonism and blatant disregard for those who might be doubting. This was a great antidote to that and an example that what is “good” is often more important than what is “true.” Would recommend to anyone struggling with their own or a loved ones beliefs.

[Cathi · Rating 4 out of 5]

This little book is packed with truths which are beautifully expressed. Michael Wilcox's way of communicating always touches my heart and enlightens my mind. This book has a little section which touched me so powerfully (probably my mind even more than my heart) which I'll never forget. I even bought a little piece of decor for my home (certainly nothing which Wilcox would recommend doing--haha) which makes me smile when I look at it and remember the chapter in the book that I loved so much.

[Larry Claussen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very interesting book. While listening to it I had to think about my own thoughts and feelings about things from the past that influence my future. It has caused me to remember that the past happened to someone else. I can learn from it and do better today but I should expect them to have done differently. That was their reality.

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

A wonderful book about staying in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Brother Wilcox doesn't try to refute specific concerns, but gives several tools that can help each of us stay through the concerns, questions, and problems. I love Brother Wilcox's tender heart and way of opening it up for the reader. He has so much experience with addressing concerns as an institute teacher.

[Veronica · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't agree with everything the other says; but, I guess that is why it's called an opinion. Several items were thought provoking, and I always enjoy that. Not as useful as I was hoping, but I don't currently have an impulse to leave. Some points were helpful as a preventative tactic. I will most likely read it again someday when this topic becomes more pertinent to me.

[Janae · Rating 4 out of 5]

Listened to this and I appreciated his honesty and openness in things that may be hard to swallow concerning history or church leader in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. But, also that for some things we won't have all the answers our hearts desire. Just a good book that brought me a lot of thought.

[Jane · Rating 4 out of 5]

Michael Wilcox is a wise man. What he says makes great sense to me and I feel of his conviction, his understanding of faith crises, and his love of mankind. A book for those who are troubled with questions and want some reasons to to stay faithful. His analogies explain his reasoning very effectively.

[Karen Hiatt Brace · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoy this authors books. Admittedly if I had realized the subject matter I may not have read this book. I chose it simply by my love of this author. That being said I am very glad that I read it. I actually read and highlighted the book and listened to it on audio. It is a quick enjoyable read.

[Jen · Rating 4 out of 5]

3 1/2 stars. As always, Michael has some great stories and analogies. I particularly liked the ideas about “balancing the scales” and the Hans Christian Andersen story of the magic mirror that warps the way we view things. My complaint is that occasionally the author veers into a more academic tone that detracts from his overall more personal message.

[Momsandeeaol.com Spencer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Words that can help you stay!

A clear and honest examination that can help you weigh your doubts and struggles realistically and look past them to the weightier factors he leads you to examine

[Deb · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good thoughts about holding on to faith and staying in the church in an increasingly faithless and Godless world. Thanks to Brother Wilcox for tackling some tough things head on. There are no easy answers but Brother Wilcox gives us much to think about.

[Lauren Perotto · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book. A lot of great insights and very timely. I’d like to get a hard copy to use as a study companion and reread it more intentionally.