Step Up or Step Out: How to Deal with Difficult People Even If You Hate Conflict

by Jonno White

The Truth About Conflict With Difficult People I’ve discovered a SIMPLE way to deal with difficult people. It doesn’t require a massive conflict or confrontation. All you need is CLEAR EXPECTATIONS to see results! Because, contrary to popular belief, conflict is the LAST step for successfully dealing with a difficult person. By clarifying or changing expectations and picking small battles without any surprises, the difficult people in your life will step up or step out with four weeks (without ANY one-off massive battles where everyone loses!). If you’re thinking, “But I don’t have enough confidence to have conflict with this difficult person…” I’ve created 3 stages to dealing with difficult people that you can start implementing right ✅ HOW CLEAR ARE YOUR EXPECTATIONS? Remember when that person started in your organisation or came into your life? How clearly did you lay out your expectations for them? Most leaders only score a 5/10 in stage one which explains why you’re finding it so hard to deal with that difficult person! ✅ HAVE A CRUCIAL CONVERSATION TO RE-CLARIFY OR CHANGE EXPECTATIONS. You’re stressed about a big fallout conflict or confrontation where everyone loses. Forget that. Instead, I’ll show you how to have a crucial conversation where you re-clarify or change expectations so that everyone wins. By clarifying or changing expectations with the difficult person, you’re setting a foundation to keep them accountable for their behaviour moving forward. I’ll explain the other strategy AND everything else you need to know about dealing with difficult people even if you hate conflict in my new book, “STEP UP OR STEP OUT” I packed as much as I could into this 62-page book, ➡️ Why dealing with difficult people is both possible and remarkably simple but it’s painfully difficult (page 8) ➡️ The secret to dealing with a difficult person so they step up or step out within four weeks (page 8) ➡️ Do you really think you have to put up with their poor behaviour because you hate conflict? (page 9) ➡️ 4 ingredients of the recipe for disaster (and how to avoid these at all cost so you don’t end up having a massive conflict where nobody wins) (page 25) ➡️ Why clarifying expectations is the foundation of dealing well with difficult people (page 26) ➡️ Why avoiding conflict isn’t an option (and how to do it in a way that’s 10x less uncomfortable and painful than the big blow-ups we often experience) (page 27) ➡️ Why it’s always a bad sign when an employee is surprised (and why you NEED to focus on removing the element of surprise from your relationships with difficult people) (page 28) ➡️ The difference between unclear expectations and unrealistic expectations (and how unrealistic expectations are the secret ingredient that makes difficult people so… difficult) (page 31) ➡️ The 3 stages to dealing with a difficult person so they step up or step out within four weeks (page 35) ➡️ The simple strategy I use with my clients to help them work out how clear their expectations are for their team (page 36) ➡️ What to do if conflict is your nemesis (and a simple framework for having a crucial conversation that starts with self-deprecation and an apology that ACTUALLY WORKS) (page 38) &l

Kindle Edition

Published April 9, 2021

Reviews

[Abeer AlRasbi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sounds very simple 3 steps yet painful process as the author mentioned!

A small book of 60 pages that I finished in 2hours of deep reading and brought lots of lightbulbs that I think would make a huge difference in dealing with difficult people at work !

Worth trying and possibly trusting the process!

[Norm Tresadern · Rating 3 out of 5]

Expensive and largely untested

This seems expensive for the size - it's more of a booklet than a book. I appreciate that it isn't full of waffle, but would have liked to have read more real-life examples - I got the district impression, though, that there weren't any.

[Molly Wiesner · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book for leaders!

If you don't like confrontation, this is the best method I've ever found for working with other people.

It works both for managing up and down the value chain, although when going up you are clarifying expectations for yourself and not them.

The process is virtually stress-free compared to the alternative of facing a huge blowup moment!

Thanks Jono for writing this book!

[Devin Ryder · Rating 5 out of 5]

Recommend to anyone looking for help handling difficult employees and team members. This is a great, short read that is immediately applicable and provides a simple strategy that is straightforward to use. Great read!