What do you think?
Rate this book
Years of Intoxication
For He Gu, to be secretly in love is like a strong alcoholic drink. Obviously, once it flows into your system, dizziness, the loss of self-control and suffering will follow closely by, making it possible for anyone to be fatally attracted like moths to flames, and willingly endure the hardships.
While you made sure to not overdo it, I’ve become completely intoxicated……however, for every intoxicated feeling, you will inevitably wake up from it one day.
When Song Ju Han continued to act childish and recklessly destroyed He Gu’s tenderness for him, he had never imagined that the man has already been written into his destiny. Even more, he had never imagined that—the person brought to him by destiny—would one day want to escape……
While you made sure to not overdo it, I’ve become completely intoxicated……however, for every intoxicated feeling, you will inevitably wake up from it one day.
When Song Ju Han continued to act childish and recklessly destroyed He Gu’s tenderness for him, he had never imagined that the man has already been written into his destiny. Even more, he had never imagined that—the person brought to him by destiny—would one day want to escape……
702 pages, Kindle Edition
Published January 10, 2021
15 people are currently reading
177 people want to read
About the author
Shui Qian Cheng
65 books91 followersAssociated Names:
* Shui Qian Cheng (English)
* 水千丞 (Chinese)
* Shui Qian Cheng (English)
* 水千丞 (Chinese)
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews
May 4, 2025
I really couldn't help myself to consume this, and I'm really biased towards 水千丞's works. And if you enjoy reading purely gut-wrenching dogblood and wife crematorium novels, you'll really have no way to get out of her rabbit hole. And surely, 一醉经年 was also a very much delightful (painful) experience.
一醉经年 is a deeply emotional and psychologically intense portrayal of a complicated, and highly imbalanced relationship, particularly from He Gu’s perspective. It particularly explored themes of self-sacrifice, emotional dependency, unrequited love, and the quiet pain of devotion without reciprocation. He Gu’s character is shaped by long-term resignation and quiet endurance, that he's willing to sacrifice dignity, finances, and even future possibilities for fleeting moments of connection with Song Juhan. For seven years, man, seven years! He was enduring for so long, not even included the three years he liked Juhan before they got in this ill-fated relationship. But there’s this haunting beauty in his internal rationalizations, and the writing effectively captures how someone can be intoxicated in love that’s more about presence than mutuality.
Well, if you're looking for a tale of romantic fulfillment, you shouldn't be here. Because this is a deep exploration of love's darker facets, of how it can hurt, bind, and even consume, if not held with care and respect. Because Song Juhan, on the other hand, is He Gu's complete opposite. And his "love" for He Gu is possessive, selfish, and obsessive—rooted in fear of abandonment rather than genuine care, which he will never truly understand, not until He Gu has nothing for him anymore but indifference.
What I love the most is the transformation of He Gu’s character. He does not stop loving Juhan, but he begins to love himself more. The act of walking away is not an act of hate, but an act of healing. He no longer wants to be a prisoner of Song Juhan's inability to love properly. In this sense, He Gu’s character arc is one of emotional liberation. He reclaims his dignity, and that becomes his redemption. In light with this, Song Juhan also had his transformation. But he's still childish and destructive, as he, finally learns to "love" after losing the one person who loved him most. I believe the tragedy isn’t just in what was lost, but in what was never truly shared.
I believe Song Juhan suffered enough, and this is coming from someone who's favorite 188 scum gong is Shao Qun (from 娘娘腔/Sissy). He Gu is really a stubborn guy, and I love him so much for that. Song Juhan deserved all the indifference He Gu gave him, and all the twisting pain that comes with it. It's not on par with the sufferings He Gu endured in those seven years, but that's enough for Song Juhan to finally really change. He Gu’s indifference is not a lack of love—it’s a survival instinct. After years of hurt and longing, he shuts down to protect himself. And for someone like Juhan, used to being the center of attention, that silence is the harshest blow. Indifference is painful not because it’s loud, but because it’s final. It’s when someone walks away, not to be chased, but because they simply no longer care.
When He Gu finally gives him that chance, it is not out of weakness or nostalgia, but a choice made from strength. He returns with clear eyes and a changed heart. He knows what he deserves, and he sets boundaries. He loves Juhan still, but now, he expects to be loved in return, and not as a shadow in the background, but as an equal partner.
Their reconciliation is not a fairytale ending, but it is a powerful resolution. It does not erase the pain they caused each other, but it acknowledges it, and grows from it. And what makes this story so moving to me is that it does not present love as perfect or easy. Instead, it shows love as a process that is messy, slow, and sometimes ugly. It also reminds us that change is possible, but only when both people are willing to confront themselves and meet each other halfway. Their love is as beautiful as it is exhausting. But choosing to try again, may be one of the bravest thing one can do.
一醉经年 is a deeply emotional and psychologically intense portrayal of a complicated, and highly imbalanced relationship, particularly from He Gu’s perspective. It particularly explored themes of self-sacrifice, emotional dependency, unrequited love, and the quiet pain of devotion without reciprocation. He Gu’s character is shaped by long-term resignation and quiet endurance, that he's willing to sacrifice dignity, finances, and even future possibilities for fleeting moments of connection with Song Juhan. For seven years, man, seven years! He was enduring for so long, not even included the three years he liked Juhan before they got in this ill-fated relationship. But there’s this haunting beauty in his internal rationalizations, and the writing effectively captures how someone can be intoxicated in love that’s more about presence than mutuality.
Well, if you're looking for a tale of romantic fulfillment, you shouldn't be here. Because this is a deep exploration of love's darker facets, of how it can hurt, bind, and even consume, if not held with care and respect. Because Song Juhan, on the other hand, is He Gu's complete opposite. And his "love" for He Gu is possessive, selfish, and obsessive—rooted in fear of abandonment rather than genuine care, which he will never truly understand, not until He Gu has nothing for him anymore but indifference.
What I love the most is the transformation of He Gu’s character. He does not stop loving Juhan, but he begins to love himself more. The act of walking away is not an act of hate, but an act of healing. He no longer wants to be a prisoner of Song Juhan's inability to love properly. In this sense, He Gu’s character arc is one of emotional liberation. He reclaims his dignity, and that becomes his redemption. In light with this, Song Juhan also had his transformation. But he's still childish and destructive, as he, finally learns to "love" after losing the one person who loved him most. I believe the tragedy isn’t just in what was lost, but in what was never truly shared.
I believe Song Juhan suffered enough, and this is coming from someone who's favorite 188 scum gong is Shao Qun (from 娘娘腔/Sissy). He Gu is really a stubborn guy, and I love him so much for that. Song Juhan deserved all the indifference He Gu gave him, and all the twisting pain that comes with it. It's not on par with the sufferings He Gu endured in those seven years, but that's enough for Song Juhan to finally really change. He Gu’s indifference is not a lack of love—it’s a survival instinct. After years of hurt and longing, he shuts down to protect himself. And for someone like Juhan, used to being the center of attention, that silence is the harshest blow. Indifference is painful not because it’s loud, but because it’s final. It’s when someone walks away, not to be chased, but because they simply no longer care.
When He Gu finally gives him that chance, it is not out of weakness or nostalgia, but a choice made from strength. He returns with clear eyes and a changed heart. He knows what he deserves, and he sets boundaries. He loves Juhan still, but now, he expects to be loved in return, and not as a shadow in the background, but as an equal partner.
Their reconciliation is not a fairytale ending, but it is a powerful resolution. It does not erase the pain they caused each other, but it acknowledges it, and grows from it. And what makes this story so moving to me is that it does not present love as perfect or easy. Instead, it shows love as a process that is messy, slow, and sometimes ugly. It also reminds us that change is possible, but only when both people are willing to confront themselves and meet each other halfway. Their love is as beautiful as it is exhausting. But choosing to try again, may be one of the bravest thing one can do.
March 17, 2023
Years of Intoxication is a deeply emotional and captivating novel that took me on an angsty journey. Despite the pain it brought, I couldn't put it down. It was reminiscent of a BE novel, but with exceptional character development that saw both He Gu and Song Juhan evolved while still staying true to their initial selves. He Gu, in particular, stood out as a character who was foolish in love yet emotionally mature and level-headed in their relationship. His emotional strength was impressive and the way he controlled his feelings was amazing.
The plot twist was a mind-blowing surprise that left me cursing out loud and in shock. It was unexpected, and I couldn't express my shock enough. However, I was truly satisfied with the ending, especially with Song Juhan's redemption.
The writing, while engaging, was at times a bit repetitive with the author frequently reminding readers of the characters' strong wills and the pain they were feeling. This habit of repeating lines was a bit distracting, but it didn't take away from the overall quality of the novel.
Although the extras were not translated, I read them in raw and found them to be sweet and enjoyable. I would definitely recommend checking them out.
In conclusion, Years of Intoxication has become my favorite 188 novel, and He Gu has taken over as my favorite 188 shou, surpassing Li Shuo of Winner Takes All. I highly recommend this novel, and I am confident that it will leave a lasting impression on anyone who reads it.
The plot twist was a mind-blowing surprise that left me cursing out loud and in shock. It was unexpected, and I couldn't express my shock enough. However, I was truly satisfied with the ending, especially with Song Juhan's redemption.
The writing, while engaging, was at times a bit repetitive with the author frequently reminding readers of the characters' strong wills and the pain they were feeling. This habit of repeating lines was a bit distracting, but it didn't take away from the overall quality of the novel.
Although the extras were not translated, I read them in raw and found them to be sweet and enjoyable. I would definitely recommend checking them out.
In conclusion, Years of Intoxication has become my favorite 188 novel, and He Gu has taken over as my favorite 188 shou, surpassing Li Shuo of Winner Takes All. I highly recommend this novel, and I am confident that it will leave a lasting impression on anyone who reads it.
September 15, 2021
Toxic. Toxic. And toxic.
But the webtoon adaptation is pure genius 🙌
*Ongoing
But the webtoon adaptation is pure genius 🙌
*Ongoing
February 19, 2022
I think the author did a really good job with the forgiveness narrative. But man, they really did put MC from hell and back. :'(
February 17, 2023
嗯，看看这次会不会让我想砸手机。唉，果然不是我喜欢的类型。好吃懒做还特别会玩。你是当别人是鸭子？你找鸭子还得付钱呢...我擦...你知道还让他做？小何你也太....唉，原来是初中就认识的，这太子哥肯定没少利用小何...(1)
31012023
一般都是这样的，小时候认为重要的事，长大了就不会觉得重要，那是一个人成长的证明。但我不会，我比较念旧，也会比较记仇。小何啊，你何必这样呢？他这么睡别人，你还跟他睡？这不正常，这一点都不正常，一点都不应该啊... 唉，你这么舔狗...有意思吗？你看看他谈你的那个态度，你真的觉得值得吗？说你是后宫？唉，开始就是那么渣，唉，你对自己和对方倒是理解的让人心疼。唉，何必呢，何必这样啊...但他确实让你改变了那敷衍的人生习惯(2)哇～顾先生～要不你受了咱们可爱的何故吧～其实你真的可以跟着顾青裴走，他会给你长很多宋居寒给不了的见识...(3)就这样你就生气了？你是谁？人都来了你还气？我看你只是想找个人泻火 。啊对，加上嫉妒冯峥和就像你说的，无理取闹。你既然这样，去找个鸭子都不一定奉陪 呵呵呵呵呵＊白眼，爽？怎么可能爽，随便找一个都会比你爽...我看你是自己爽了吧。看来这就是报复了，只是宋核桃真的没想到他病了吧...想到就生气（4）
---- 01022023
看来，要是宋核桃不在，我们小何应该会有个好的恋情，小何已经没救了呢，生活各种迹象都是和宋核桃有关...确实，我也想问这个问题啊冯峥...小何你何必呢...（5）确实，好不容易吃个饭，有必要这样么小冯？闹得大家都不开心，而且你这已经算人身攻击了...（6）其实何故要是绝情起来应该会比其他小受来的绝情，期待期待。而且宋核桃你竟然会觉得有意思...唉。这小子，真的当自己是老几啊...什么不配，不配的也应该是你啊...有本事你别吃，而且宋核桃你之前叫人马上来，人家来了又这样，你可以去死一死。哈哈哈，果然何故的态度最气人，能想象出那贱逼的表情。啊，又开始了，别人的错怪到了小受身上...呵-这么会啊，别急，你以后就只能敲核桃了。（7）我去...私生饭真的可耻（9）这圈子真小，还能看见彭放这小子，只是宋核桃知道应该又会不爽了...好啊！原来这本的时间是在针锋的前面？！(10)是的小何，其实你很受欢迎，我还觉得你比宋核桃好看来着。唉，这里看着宋核桃还行（其实只是看过太多渣，要求低了而已）。你不要说，这冯峥打电话打得真不是时候...唉-可怜了小何。（13）冯峥这句话倒是很良心，宋核桃确实比他渣了好多（不止一点）（15）绝对是宋核桃故意的，这人那么年轻就接触了演艺圈，怎么会不知道这些？果然啊...看这个样子，肯定是故意的，就是为了赢过冯峥。还是可怜我们小何，这么一戏弄...谁不会沦陷...我去，不是小辉哥剪的头发吧。宋核桃先生，朋友之间也是不能爽约的，请你不要为了自己那低劣的自尊心把人占着。（17）唉，冯峥即使是争，用上帝视角看他的发言也真是中肯...唉，可怜了小何，你其实这个时候就应该远离(18) 唉，这鱼也确实挡了顾老板一半的煞气（但没挡全啊魂淡）（19）嗯，宋核桃，可以去死一死，最讨厌让人做这种选择题的人了。唉，真心疼，说是理性其实一点也不。这孩子太欠，小何都把你拉黑了，你也看见宋核桃那样子了怎么还不远离...嗯，肯定又是什么黑化老剧码，小何你不要踏进去，这小贱逼无视就好，而且宋核桃知道了他就活不了了。（23）时间线倒是对上了，正好是顾先生和原狗在钙吧对峙的时间～我去我去我去，你别给我上嘴，冯峥你敢上嘴试试看！（24）让人失望，为了自己的利益把别人往火坑推，显示主权有什么用？你明知道这混蛋之前怎么对何故的，你还这么干？你是会负责还是什么？冯总你牛逼，你简直太‘牛逼’了（白眼）好啊好啊，成事不足败事有余的家伙...把吗字去了，他就是故意的。呵，看看你说的话，好像人家不舒服不是你造成的一样。哇塞诶，宋核桃，你真够魂淡的。算了，我早就知道了，只希望这文快点结束。宋核桃你还好意思说，这些话小何问你还差不多，你没有那个资格。（26）对的小何，你现在这样是对的。不要让别人越过你的底线。对对对，就是要这么冷漠，这才好，这才有效。哇哦，这就是教科书级的家暴男发言：下次不会了，你别怕我－什么的宋核桃你去撞墙吧。啊对，冯总你说的都对，下次别说了，因为没人想听。 唉，顾先生和小何两个真是同病相连啊～（27）唉，这时机太巧了，怎么就这么碰上了呢。也好也好，这样你就能早点对宋居寒死心。其实这篇文更适合：你却爱上了一个煞笔／针锋对决这个名字。宋核桃你还好意思生气？也不知道是谁当初在那边努力鼓掌都忘了抑制声音。乱撒气也真是188的特色了，唉。这是在干什么？你自己在胡乱洒欲望，这边还在乱撒气，还不允许人发火了？还牵扯别的事情，就不能以事论事了？你就把你下面给阉了吧，人说累了你还说要。（28）你其实就是想要个人给你暖被单。呵，看吧，马上本质就出来了，人腰不紧了关你屁事。(29)分手快乐，被人说到痛点了吧，对啊，你是老几？凭什么你能管他不能管？我擦，原来是两个人好过啊，怪不得那么针锋相对。那你们当中是冯总受啊还是宋核桃受啊哈哈哈哈（31）呵呵呵呵，宋核桃你完了，你应该完了。但文章还有一大半，不知道这是大虐还是小虐。嗯嗯嗯很不错，打得真好，最好直接毁容让你知道别人还是只看你的脸。怎的？干嘛不打?想打你好久了宋核桃。还敢怪别人？还好彭放他说了，不然你还要得逞多久？啊对就是要让你丢脸，小何因为你丢了多少回脸了？唉，小何你最好这个时候赶紧断了，让对方学学（32）唉...这小贱逼还比宋核桃来的良心...看来你确实人不错啊小贱贱。唉，小松肯定是因为。顶不住了才过来撮合，你要真敢撮合，我会祝你平安啊小松（34）
---- 02022023
小何，你其实应该搬家...不然这房子，宋核桃随时都能进来，还敢吼啊，祝宋核桃早日失声。呵，你不计较？我们小何计较而且不需要你的‘不计较’。这瘟神就不能死远点么...啊对，你可以不告诉他你跟冯混蛋好过，他也不用告诉你他去干了什么。（35）绝对不一样啊...其实你应该去，这样，好歹可以避开宋核桃。好的，这烂核桃还碰毒，你要把小何送进警局我跟你没完。这老婆是想干什么....烂核桃你死也抵不过来。毁了就毁了呗，就应该让他毁一毁。就因为个离婚这两人把多少人扯进来了...最讨厌这种人（36）好啊，简称就是把错怪在小何身上，没人想到小何会怎样么？唉...小何，你为什么...这么傻...对啊...最后一次，也确实是把你彻底毁了...啊对，你现在才知道你这烂核桃干了什么蠢事？虐吧，现在开始虐渣攻吧。（37）顾总总是让我想起黎总，应该是气质关系吧。（38）写媒体小报的人真应该要掌嘴，别人的事情瞎说什么？（39）好的，这个看来是小虐，那我就先不享受这短暂的糖了。你的独占欲就是喜欢的最好证明，你要是管不住你下半身就别想小何回到你身边。小何，他没有心...他真的没有...呵，话谁都会说，就是要看人会不会做，小何你真是��静／理智的让人心疼啊...嗯这样才好，最好烂核桃这个时候被小何撞见偷情然后冷静绝情的被小何分手。（41）呵，另一个渣攻出来了....唉，小何，这你就不知道了，还真的是他丢人些..人家是裸照被公开了...(42)呵呵，你说为什么，你一点逼数都没有吗？你以前做了什么蠢事你都不记得了吗？（43）哇塞诶，小何怎么这么聪明，唉，干脆你和顾叔叔在一块儿好了...总是有人觉得自己好像很重要似地，看着碧池的样子就不爽，趁着时候跟烂核桃分开吧。大刀来啦～虽然一点都不觉得虐（44）混蛋，怎么躲也躲不过...就让他多急几天也好啊...这小子真聪明哈哈哈哈。小何你太帅了～嗯～这司机真好～Vanessa这么好的妈妈，怎么会摊上这样子的儿子呢呵呵呵呵呵。说到点上了啊妈妈～对啊烂核桃，你当时对他好么，呵呵呵-自己想想。嗯，你现在才知道吼，你自己也知道他有多聪明，让你忍个7年看看。妈妈，你真的太小看渣攻了...一般他们是最后都不认错的...(46)我去-真好真好，终于不是受受单方面的洁了。哇塞诶！小何你1了！！！！恭喜啊～呵呵，终于气到这烂核桃了（就是有点可怜我们司机小贺一...)....不愧是副团长，竟然会用绑架的。哈哈哈哈，这句话太让人爽了对对对，他不干净了烂核桃你敢怎样哈哈哈哈哈。还勒人啊...进监狱吧...(48)果然，何故是我这边看过最冷酷的哈哈哈哈，看着真爽。其实真的，不要把自己的感情强压在别人身上。（52）哈哈核桃来了。快点敲核桃吧。嗯，这个关门关的太好了，就要让这两个屁孩知道，自己没有一点兴趣。（54）这老板想干什么...年纪大了能否成熟一点...唉，这位老板也不是好人，而且不愧是副团长，竟然会如此的...死不更改。终于到名句啦～打卡打卡～ 敲核桃原来如此哈哈哈哈。得不到就强，不愧是副团长，先说，小何你可不要觉得可怜，他可是在强你，还威胁（56）水大好可爱哈哈哈哈还得解释这些剧情哈哈哈。哎呀....心酸了，为什么小白杨是被掐的最厉害的一部....明明剧情比这个有意思多了。这个对不起没用啊宋核桃...这样看着，小何真的很可怜。（58）剁了最好。周翔好像是下一部的～期待期待～唉，还是小贱贱好，之前把你说的那么垃圾是我不对，小贱贱你太可爱了。这倒是个不错的提议（60）妈妈你怎么每次说话都那么中肯呢，这么看破红尘了吗？！好牛逼。 呃，ok，这都可以...怎么突然有点尬（63）唉，粉丝和黑粉什么时候。能做个人，默默抵触就行了，公开干什么？你当你是英雄？哦？是icu？终于？呵，怎么这父亲都是这副模样？都不会当父亲了是么...去死吧（69）叫他滚？渣父你不配，除非你补偿不然请去死。没吃亏？你去吃吃看，看看是不是亏了您，也好，就这么消失了也好。这个提议不错。好歹两个人不是he 哇～小何你这句说的我太爽了！！！！（71）唉，到最后还是太弱了...还是妥协了...(74)小何做得对，就是要经济独立。我去，短时间内我竟然忘了最后顾总和原狗是怎么和好的了...这脑子真该洗洗。（124）
看完了，花了更短的时间把这本看完了，这本其实说起来是比针锋对决来的好看，特别是我们小何的实际和冷酷看的我不要太爽哦，就是应该要这么虐渣攻，虐到渣攻差不多没命才好。这节奏其实蛮快的，一半不到就已经开始了正片就开始虐渣攻了（还是那个字，爽）。明明很讨厌娱乐圈+烂核桃这种类型，看的我还ok （应该会给个3星）下一部应该就是职业替身了，听着蛮感兴趣的（期待了好久）。
---- 03022023
31012023
一般都是这样的，小时候认为重要的事，长大了就不会觉得重要，那是一个人成长的证明。但我不会，我比较念旧，也会比较记仇。小何啊，你何必这样呢？他这么睡别人，你还跟他睡？这不正常，这一点都不正常，一点都不应该啊... 唉，你这么舔狗...有意思吗？你看看他谈你的那个态度，你真的觉得值得吗？说你是后宫？唉，开始就是那么渣，唉，你对自己和对方倒是理解的让人心疼。唉，何必呢，何必这样啊...但他确实让你改变了那敷衍的人生习惯(2)哇～顾先生～要不你受了咱们可爱的何故吧～其实你真的可以跟着顾青裴走，他会给你长很多宋居寒给不了的见识...(3)就这样你就生气了？你是谁？人都来了你还气？我看你只是想找个人泻火 。啊对，加上嫉妒冯峥和就像你说的，无理取闹。你既然这样，去找个鸭子都不一定奉陪 呵呵呵呵呵＊白眼，爽？怎么可能爽，随便找一个都会比你爽...我看你是自己爽了吧。看来这就是报复了，只是宋核桃真的没想到他病了吧...想到就生气（4）
---- 01022023
看来，要是宋核桃不在，我们小何应该会有个好的恋情，小何已经没救了呢，生活各种迹象都是和宋核桃有关...确实，我也想问这个问题啊冯峥...小何你何必呢...（5）确实，好不容易吃个饭，有必要这样么小冯？闹得大家都不开心，而且你这已经算人身攻击了...（6）其实何故要是绝情起来应该会比其他小受来的绝情，期待期待。而且宋核桃你竟然会觉得有意思...唉。这小子，真的当自己是老几啊...什么不配，不配的也应该是你啊...有本事你别吃，而且宋核桃你之前叫人马上来，人家来了又这样，你可以去死一死。哈哈哈，果然何故的态度最气人，能想象出那贱逼的表情。啊，又开始了，别人的错怪到了小受身上...呵-这么会啊，别急，你以后就只能敲核桃了。（7）我去...私生饭真的可耻（9）这圈子真小，还能看见彭放这小子，只是宋核桃知道应该又会不爽了...好啊！原来这本的时间是在针锋的前面？！(10)是的小何，其实你很受欢迎，我还觉得你比宋核桃好看来着。唉，这里看着宋核桃还行（其实只是看过太多渣，要求低了而已）。你不要说，这冯峥打电话打得真不是时候...唉-可怜了小何。（13）冯峥这句话倒是很良心，宋核桃确实比他渣了好多（不止一点）（15）绝对是宋核桃故意的，这人那么年轻就接触了演艺圈，怎么会不知道这些？果然啊...看这个样子，肯定是故意的，就是为了赢过冯峥。还是可怜我们小何，这么一戏弄...谁不会沦陷...我去，不是小辉哥剪的头发吧。宋核桃先生，朋友之间也是不能爽约的，请你不要为了自己那低劣的自尊心把人占着。（17）唉，冯峥即使是争，用上帝视角看他的发言也真是中肯...唉，可怜了小何，你其实这个时候就应该远离(18) 唉，这鱼也确实挡了顾老板一半的煞气（但没挡全啊魂淡）（19）嗯，宋核桃，可以去死一死，最讨厌让人做这种选择题的人了。唉，真心疼，说是理性其实一点也不。这孩子太欠，小何都把你拉黑了，你也看见宋核桃那样子了怎么还不远离...嗯，肯定又是什么黑化老剧码，小何你不要踏进去，这小贱逼无视就好，而且宋核桃知道了他就活不了了。（23）时间线倒是对上了，正好是顾先生和原狗在钙吧对峙的时间～我去我去我去，你别给我上嘴，冯峥你敢上嘴试试看！（24）让人失望，为了自己的利益把别人往火坑推，显示主权有什么用？你明知道这混蛋之前怎么对何故的，你还这么干？你是会负责还是什么？冯总你牛逼，你简直太‘牛逼’了（白眼）好啊好啊，成事不足败事有余的家伙...把吗字去了，他就是故意的。呵，看看你说的话，好像人家不舒服不是你造成的一样。哇塞诶，宋核桃，你真够魂淡的。算了，我早就知道了，只希望这文快点结束。宋核桃你还好意思说，这些话小何问你还差不多，你没有那个资格。（26）对的小何，你现在这样是对的。不要让别人越过你的底线。对对对，就是要这么冷漠，这才好，这才有效。哇哦，这就是教科书级的家暴男发言：下次不会了，你别怕我－什么的宋核桃你去撞墙吧。啊对，冯总你说的都对，下次别说了，因为没人想听。 唉，顾先生和小何两个真是同病相连啊～（27）唉，这时机太巧了，怎么就这么碰上了呢。也好也好，这样你就能早点对宋居寒死心。其实这篇文更适合：你却爱上了一个煞笔／针锋对决这个名字。宋核桃你还好意思生气？也不知道是谁当初在那边努力鼓掌都忘了抑制声音。乱撒气也真是188的特色了，唉。这是在干什么？你自己在胡乱洒欲望，这边还在乱撒气，还不允许人发火了？还牵扯别的事情，就不能以事论事了？你就把你下面给阉了吧，人说累了你还说要。（28）你其实就是想要个人给你暖被单。呵，看吧，马上本质就出来了，人腰不紧了关你屁事。(29)分手快乐，被人说到痛点了吧，对啊，你是老几？凭什么你能管他不能管？我擦，原来是两个人好过啊，怪不得那么针锋相对。那你们当中是冯总受啊还是宋核桃受啊哈哈哈哈（31）呵呵呵呵，宋核桃你完了，你应该完了。但文章还有一大半，不知道这是大虐还是小虐。嗯嗯嗯很不错，打得真好，最好直接毁容让你知道别人还是只看你的脸。怎的？干嘛不打?想打你好久了宋核桃。还敢怪别人？还好彭放他说了，不然你还要得逞多久？啊对就是要让你丢脸，小何因为你丢了多少回脸了？唉，小何你最好这个时候赶紧断了，让对方学学（32）唉...这小贱逼还比宋核桃来的良心...看来你确实人不错啊小贱贱。唉，小松肯定是因为。顶不住了才过来撮合，你要真敢撮合，我会祝你平安啊小松（34）
---- 02022023
小何，你其实应该搬家...不然这房子，宋核桃随时都能进来，还敢吼啊，祝宋核桃早日失声。呵，你不计较？我们小何计较而且不需要你的‘不计较’。这瘟神就不能死远点么...啊对，你可以不告诉他你跟冯混蛋好过，他也不用告诉你他去干了什么。（35）绝对不一样啊...其实你应该去，这样，好歹可以避开宋核桃。好的，这烂核桃还碰毒，你要把小何送进警局我跟你没完。这老婆是想干什么....烂核桃你死也抵不过来。毁了就毁了呗，就应该让他毁一毁。就因为个离婚这两人把多少人扯进来了...最讨厌这种人（36）好啊，简称就是把错怪在小何身上，没人想到小何会怎样么？唉...小何，你为什么...这么傻...对啊...最后一次，也确实是把你彻底毁了...啊对，你现在才知道你这烂核桃干了什么蠢事？虐吧，现在开始虐渣攻吧。（37）顾总总是让我想起黎总，应该是气质关系吧。（38）写媒体小报的人真应该要掌嘴，别人的事情瞎说什么？（39）好的，这个看来是小虐，那我就先不享受这短暂的糖了。你的独占欲就是喜欢的最好证明，你要是管不住你下半身就别想小何回到你身边。小何，他没有心...他真的没有...呵，话谁都会说，就是要看人会不会做，小何你真是��静／理智的让人心疼啊...嗯这样才好，最好烂核桃这个时候被小何撞见偷情然后冷静绝情的被小何分手。（41）呵，另一个渣攻出来了....唉，小何，这你就不知道了，还真的是他丢人些..人家是裸照被公开了...(42)呵呵，你说为什么，你一点逼数都没有吗？你以前做了什么蠢事你都不记得了吗？（43）哇塞诶，小何怎么这么聪明，唉，干脆你和顾叔叔在一块儿好了...总是有人觉得自己好像很重要似地，看着碧池的样子就不爽，趁着时候跟烂核桃分开吧。大刀来啦～虽然一点都不觉得虐（44）混蛋，怎么躲也躲不过...就让他多急几天也好啊...这小子真聪明哈哈哈哈。小何你太帅了～嗯～这司机真好～Vanessa这么好的妈妈，怎么会摊上这样子的儿子呢呵呵呵呵呵。说到点上了啊妈妈～对啊烂核桃，你当时对他好么，呵呵呵-自己想想。嗯，你现在才知道吼，你自己也知道他有多聪明，让你忍个7年看看。妈妈，你真的太小看渣攻了...一般他们是最后都不认错的...(46)我去-真好真好，终于不是受受单方面的洁了。哇塞诶！小何你1了！！！！恭喜啊～呵呵，终于气到这烂核桃了（就是有点可怜我们司机小贺一...)....不愧是副团长，竟然会用绑架的。哈哈哈哈，这句话太让人爽了对对对，他不干净了烂核桃你敢怎样哈哈哈哈哈。还勒人啊...进监狱吧...(48)果然，何故是我这边看过最冷酷的哈哈哈哈，看着真爽。其实真的，不要把自己的感情强压在别人身上。（52）哈哈核桃来了。快点敲核桃吧。嗯，这个关门关的太好了，就要让这两个屁孩知道，自己没有一点兴趣。（54）这老板想干什么...年纪大了能否成熟一点...唉，这位老板也不是好人，而且不愧是副团长，竟然会如此的...死不更改。终于到名句啦～打卡打卡～ 敲核桃原来如此哈哈哈哈。得不到就强，不愧是副团长，先说，小何你可不要觉得可怜，他可是在强你，还威胁（56）水大好可爱哈哈哈哈还得解释这些剧情哈哈哈。哎呀....心酸了，为什么小白杨是被掐的最厉害的一部....明明剧情比这个有意思多了。这个对不起没用啊宋核桃...这样看着，小何真的很可怜。（58）剁了最好。周翔好像是下一部的～期待期待～唉，还是小贱贱好，之前把你说的那么垃圾是我不对，小贱贱你太可爱了。这倒是个不错的提议（60）妈妈你怎么每次说话都那么中肯呢，这么看破红尘了吗？！好牛逼。 呃，ok，这都可以...怎么突然有点尬（63）唉，粉丝和黑粉什么时候。能做个人，默默抵触就行了，公开干什么？你当你是英雄？哦？是icu？终于？呵，怎么这父亲都是这副模样？都不会当父亲了是么...去死吧（69）叫他滚？渣父你不配，除非你补偿不然请去死。没吃亏？你去吃吃看，看看是不是亏了您，也好，就这么消失了也好。这个提议不错。好歹两个人不是he 哇～小何你这句说的我太爽了！！！！（71）唉，到最后还是太弱了...还是妥协了...(74)小何做得对，就是要经济独立。我去，短时间内我竟然忘了最后顾总和原狗是怎么和好的了...这脑子真该洗洗。（124）
看完了，花了更短的时间把这本看完了，这本其实说起来是比针锋对决来的好看，特别是我们小何的实际和冷酷看的我不要太爽哦，就是应该要这么虐渣攻，虐到渣攻差不多没命才好。这节奏其实蛮快的，一半不到就已经开始了正片就开始虐渣攻了（还是那个字，爽）。明明很讨厌娱乐圈+烂核桃这种类型，看的我还ok （应该会给个3星）下一部应该就是职业替身了，听着蛮感兴趣的（期待了好久）。
---- 03022023
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 19, 2024
40 chapters of utter foolishness. 40 chapters of me praying to the heavens above that this spineless, brainless MC would finally grow a backbone and leave the absolute garbage that is the ML. I dont even feel sorry for the MC, just fucking furious. He put himself in this situation from the start. The ML outright told him, that he wasn’t interested in a serious relationship, that he was only using him for sex and he still stayed. Not for a month, not for a year but for 6 YEARS.
He wasn’t trapped. He wasn’t coerced. He chose to stay. Self-respect? Nonexistent. If this book hadn’t been recommended to me by a friend, I would’ve dropped it faster than the MC drops his dignity.
ML is without exaggeration, the worst character I’ve ever encountered in my thousands of books. Trashiest. Most disgusting. Immature. Abhorrent. The kind of person that makes you lose faith in humanity. He grapes the MC, blames him for it, and says it’s his fault. He constantly compares the MC to other models, telling him his waist isn’t as tight as it used to be and he needs to work out more. Gaslights the MC and insults him everytime they see each other, saying he's nothing special and that he could be replaced anytime. He isolates the MC from his friends, throws tantrums when things don’t go his way, gets physically violent and gets jealous over nothing but still proceeds to sleep around with his model friends. And somehow, he expects the MC to be okay with all of this.
Make it make sense. Write me an essay. Explain to me how anyone—anyone—could tolerate this toxic cesspool of a person. I read every internal monologue the MC had, and I still can’t wrap my head around it. You must hate yourself so deeply that you're willing to endure this nightmare.
And if anyone find themselves relating to the MC or stuck in a similar situation please, for the love of all that’s holy, wake up. Slam your head against a wall, chug a bottle of antidelulu pills, and check yourself into a self-help institution. Seriously. Get some serious help.
I get that the author wanted readers to hate the ML so that his groveling arc would hit harder. But they went so far overboard that the groveling couldn’t possibly redeem him. He could grovel until he’s 80, crawling on his hands and knees, and I still wouldn’t forgive him. He doesn’t deserve love. He doesn’t deserve happiness. He deserves to get hit by a bus. just disgusting. 🤮
He wasn’t trapped. He wasn’t coerced. He chose to stay. Self-respect? Nonexistent. If this book hadn’t been recommended to me by a friend, I would’ve dropped it faster than the MC drops his dignity.
ML is without exaggeration, the worst character I’ve ever encountered in my thousands of books. Trashiest. Most disgusting. Immature. Abhorrent. The kind of person that makes you lose faith in humanity. He grapes the MC, blames him for it, and says it’s his fault. He constantly compares the MC to other models, telling him his waist isn’t as tight as it used to be and he needs to work out more. Gaslights the MC and insults him everytime they see each other, saying he's nothing special and that he could be replaced anytime. He isolates the MC from his friends, throws tantrums when things don’t go his way, gets physically violent and gets jealous over nothing but still proceeds to sleep around with his model friends. And somehow, he expects the MC to be okay with all of this.
Make it make sense. Write me an essay. Explain to me how anyone—anyone—could tolerate this toxic cesspool of a person. I read every internal monologue the MC had, and I still can’t wrap my head around it. You must hate yourself so deeply that you're willing to endure this nightmare.
And if anyone find themselves relating to the MC or stuck in a similar situation please, for the love of all that’s holy, wake up. Slam your head against a wall, chug a bottle of antidelulu pills, and check yourself into a self-help institution. Seriously. Get some serious help.
I get that the author wanted readers to hate the ML so that his groveling arc would hit harder. But they went so far overboard that the groveling couldn’t possibly redeem him. He could grovel until he’s 80, crawling on his hands and knees, and I still wouldn’t forgive him. He doesn’t deserve love. He doesn’t deserve happiness. He deserves to get hit by a bus. just disgusting. 🤮
September 11, 2024
I literally cannot stand the ML
September 10, 2023
SO damn toxic but so damn good
Waiting for chapter 118 ugh
Waiting for chapter 118 ugh
August 12, 2025
This novel is one of my favorites, despite having only read it in flawed fan translations (right now no official English translation exists).
At a glance it's just a dumb, tropey dark romance with lots of tropes that are common in Chinese BL dark romance novels. Like a toxic and abusive love interest who has change of heart, kidnappings, non-consensual sex, love triangles, lovesick underdog protagonist, love interest is super hot, rich and famous.
But if you dig a little deeper, it's a cleverly written story of a deeply copendent relationship and two characters who each in their own way are extremely flawed, and how this sabotages their chance of making their relationship work.
Engineer He Gu has loved pop star Song Juhan for years, ever since he was very young. Unable to capture Juhan's heart, he agreed to enter a friends-with-benefits-sort of relationship with Juhan. Since then, everything in He Gu's life has evolved around Juhan. While He Gu initially thought he could 'play the game' and have detached sex with hedonistic and commitment-averse Juhan, in reality he just found himself falling deeper and deeper in love with the charming, charismatic and god-level beauty and celebrity.
He Gu spends all his time either working or waiting around for Juhan to want him. He spends all his money on his appearance, Juhan-merch (so he can feel close to Juhan when Juhan is not around) and stuff for his apartment that will make it more appealing for Juhan when he occasionally visits (like buying a big, expensive flatscreen for Juhan to play games on, even though he can't really afford it). He Gu has no friend and is estranged from his family (his dad died years ago, his mom moved to another city after his parents divorced). In short, He Gu is a pathetic guy with no life outside his love obsession.
But He Gu is written with such nuance that the reader quickly comes to care for him. He knows he's pathetic, and his inner thoughts are frankly hard to bear - he has next to no self-esteem or confidence in himself (which later becomes quite funny, because the joke is that while He Gu thinks he's boring and unattractive, literally every hot guy in the story will at some point chase after He Gu, vying for his affection and trying to sleep with him). But he has a quiet dignity and pride, and a bottom line that he will not allow anyone to cross, not even Juhan (although he does put up with a huge amount of sh*t from Juhan).
He Gu is person who ended up in a codependent, seemingly one-sided relationship with an idol, because he is a lonely, shy guy who is isolated due to his own innate flaws. The story isn't only about how He Gu finally grows a much-needed backbone and redefines his relationship with Juhan, it's the story of how an introverted, self-deprecating and socially isolated man gradually learns to break out of his shell and find meaning in his life outside of romance.
It's also a story told from the perspective of a character who is not a reliable narrator. It's written in 3rd POV, but we follow He Gu's POV almost entirely throughout the story. We learn a lot about Juhan, but what we learn about him is colored by He Gu's perspective to an extent where the readers can't fully trust all the information we're given.
Now, Juhan is a terrible person. I found him to be a fairly realistic portrayal of a nepo baby-turned-celebrity (his mom is a super model and his dad own a major music label). Juhan grew up in the lime-light, and since he is both beautiful, has rich and famous parents and is actually a very gifted musician and singer, he has never known a life outside of stardom. He has always been worshipped by everyone around him, and he grew up in a family where 'fidelity' and 'commitment to your partner' where non-existent. He has learned that he could do whatever he wanted, always.
As a reader you're meant to side with He Gu, but the first part of the story is a subtle study of a deeply dysfunctional relationship, where we are seduced to think Juhan is the worst person ever who actively tries to hurt He Gu while not caring for him one bit. We are meant to think 'f*ck Juhan, he's a vile piece of sh*t!'. Which isn't strictly untrue, because Juhan is objectively the worst, but a lot of what Juhan does, he does because:
A) He's a dumbass who has no knowledge of how other people work and no experience in showing empathy or care for anyone but himself (seriously his parents messed up big time!)
B) He Gu never, ever communicates. Juhan might be a complete idiot, but it's not his fault he's not a mindreader, and He Gu is very good at hiding his emotions and pretending everything is fine.
C) Because A and B, whenever Juhan gets unhappy with the status quo of their relationship (or lack thereof - He Gu does like to be a bit spiteful and point out how they're soo not a couple which imo Juhan does deserve, but doesn't like being told at all) or He Gu's seeming indifference, Juhan acts out. And he does so in decidely uncharming ways.
The side characters are very well-written, and I loved how the moms were portrayed in a nuanced way - neither is shown to be an actual good mother, but that doesn't make either a bad person.
He Gu's friends are the best and deserved the world.
The ending made sense to me, even though it seems to be divisive among fans. Don't expect anything but a 'happy' ending (not everyone thinsk any ending involving Juhan is a happy one, but I disagree).
I hated Juhan for most of the novel, but I still think he redeemed himself (as much as someone with his track record can find any true redemption, which is debatable). He Gu's journey was well-written, even though I think the first half of the novel is a bit better written than the second half.
At a glance it's just a dumb, tropey dark romance with lots of tropes that are common in Chinese BL dark romance novels. Like a toxic and abusive love interest who has change of heart, kidnappings, non-consensual sex, love triangles, lovesick underdog protagonist, love interest is super hot, rich and famous.
But if you dig a little deeper, it's a cleverly written story of a deeply copendent relationship and two characters who each in their own way are extremely flawed, and how this sabotages their chance of making their relationship work.
Engineer He Gu has loved pop star Song Juhan for years, ever since he was very young. Unable to capture Juhan's heart, he agreed to enter a friends-with-benefits-sort of relationship with Juhan. Since then, everything in He Gu's life has evolved around Juhan. While He Gu initially thought he could 'play the game' and have detached sex with hedonistic and commitment-averse Juhan, in reality he just found himself falling deeper and deeper in love with the charming, charismatic and god-level beauty and celebrity.
He Gu spends all his time either working or waiting around for Juhan to want him. He spends all his money on his appearance, Juhan-merch (so he can feel close to Juhan when Juhan is not around) and stuff for his apartment that will make it more appealing for Juhan when he occasionally visits (like buying a big, expensive flatscreen for Juhan to play games on, even though he can't really afford it). He Gu has no friend and is estranged from his family (his dad died years ago, his mom moved to another city after his parents divorced). In short, He Gu is a pathetic guy with no life outside his love obsession.
But He Gu is written with such nuance that the reader quickly comes to care for him. He knows he's pathetic, and his inner thoughts are frankly hard to bear - he has next to no self-esteem or confidence in himself (which later becomes quite funny, because the joke is that while He Gu thinks he's boring and unattractive, literally every hot guy in the story will at some point chase after He Gu, vying for his affection and trying to sleep with him). But he has a quiet dignity and pride, and a bottom line that he will not allow anyone to cross, not even Juhan (although he does put up with a huge amount of sh*t from Juhan).
He Gu is person who ended up in a codependent, seemingly one-sided relationship with an idol, because he is a lonely, shy guy who is isolated due to his own innate flaws. The story isn't only about how He Gu finally grows a much-needed backbone and redefines his relationship with Juhan, it's the story of how an introverted, self-deprecating and socially isolated man gradually learns to break out of his shell and find meaning in his life outside of romance.
It's also a story told from the perspective of a character who is not a reliable narrator. It's written in 3rd POV, but we follow He Gu's POV almost entirely throughout the story. We learn a lot about Juhan, but what we learn about him is colored by He Gu's perspective to an extent where the readers can't fully trust all the information we're given.
Now, Juhan is a terrible person. I found him to be a fairly realistic portrayal of a nepo baby-turned-celebrity (his mom is a super model and his dad own a major music label). Juhan grew up in the lime-light, and since he is both beautiful, has rich and famous parents and is actually a very gifted musician and singer, he has never known a life outside of stardom. He has always been worshipped by everyone around him, and he grew up in a family where 'fidelity' and 'commitment to your partner' where non-existent. He has learned that he could do whatever he wanted, always.
As a reader you're meant to side with He Gu, but the first part of the story is a subtle study of a deeply dysfunctional relationship, where we are seduced to think Juhan is the worst person ever who actively tries to hurt He Gu while not caring for him one bit. We are meant to think 'f*ck Juhan, he's a vile piece of sh*t!'. Which isn't strictly untrue, because Juhan is objectively the worst, but a lot of what Juhan does, he does because:
A) He's a dumbass who has no knowledge of how other people work and no experience in showing empathy or care for anyone but himself (seriously his parents messed up big time!)
B) He Gu never, ever communicates. Juhan might be a complete idiot, but it's not his fault he's not a mindreader, and He Gu is very good at hiding his emotions and pretending everything is fine.
C) Because A and B, whenever Juhan gets unhappy with the status quo of their relationship (or lack thereof - He Gu does like to be a bit spiteful and point out how they're soo not a couple which imo Juhan does deserve, but doesn't like being told at all) or He Gu's seeming indifference, Juhan acts out. And he does so in decidely uncharming ways.
The side characters are very well-written, and I loved how the moms were portrayed in a nuanced way - neither is shown to be an actual good mother, but that doesn't make either a bad person.
He Gu's friends are the best and deserved the world.
The ending made sense to me, even though it seems to be divisive among fans. Don't expect anything but a 'happy' ending (not everyone thinsk any ending involving Juhan is a happy one, but I disagree).
I hated Juhan for most of the novel, but I still think he redeemed himself (as much as someone with his track record can find any true redemption, which is debatable). He Gu's journey was well-written, even though I think the first half of the novel is a bit better written than the second half.
October 5, 2022
Please note that I'm reading the machine translation.
I've read the half of the stories (in which He Gu was tormented for 7 years) in manhua and continued the rest in the novel.
I was looking for something like this, when the uke was suffering cause of his love to the seme and then later on finally gave up. Then the seme realised what he lost and asked for the uke's love back.
I'm glad that He Gu didn't forgive Ju Han that fast. At the same time, his love was not just missing like poof air. It was slowly and surely until he finally realised he had more to offer.
Ju Han's redemption ARC was okay, but I still hated his father.
All in all, was a good read (despite the translation xD) and I can't wait to read the rest in the manhua! (Man the art is so gorgeous)
Will I read this again? Probably from the time when He Gu decided to stop
Will I recommend this? If you're into this kind of plot, yes be my guest. Otherwise, it's better to stop rather than complaining stuff.
I've read the half of the stories (in which He Gu was tormented for 7 years) in manhua and continued the rest in the novel.
I was looking for something like this, when the uke was suffering cause of his love to the seme and then later on finally gave up. Then the seme realised what he lost and asked for the uke's love back.
I'm glad that He Gu didn't forgive Ju Han that fast. At the same time, his love was not just missing like poof air. It was slowly and surely until he finally realised he had more to offer.
Ju Han's redemption ARC was okay, but I still hated his father.
All in all, was a good read (despite the translation xD) and I can't wait to read the rest in the manhua! (Man the art is so gorgeous)
Will I read this again? Probably from the time when He Gu decided to stop
Will I recommend this? If you're into this kind of plot, yes be my guest. Otherwise, it's better to stop rather than complaining stuff.
February 8, 2025
Official english title (manhua adaptation): Intoxicated Love. Lenght: 78 chapters + extras.
Now THIS is how you do a great chasing crematorium. It has the most satisfying arc and ending from the 188 series for me. Heads up that it might be a long one because I have lots of thoughts and that this review is about the novel.
It tells the story of He Gu, a man in his late 20s that has a tumultuous dynamic with the popular singer Song Juhan. He Gu goes through his daily life overworking himself for a big company and feeling lonely, unless Song Juhan communicates with him. Due to his unrequited love of seven years, He Gu cannot help but do everything he wants. Meanwhile, Song Juhan thinks of He Gu as disposable and the person he feels comfortable with the most, although he treats him horribly. Both made a deal years ago about being friends with benefits. For He Gu, that was enough - until reality hits him in the face and he'll have to choose between putting himself first or stay intoxicated.
This book can be summed up with the metaphoric lines about He Gu being drunk in love for many years, and finally sobering up once he stopped. However, unlike many readers that (rightfully) hate on Song Juhan and think of He Gu as someone without fault, I want to offer a bit of a different perspective on that.
First, it's necessary to speak about the characters. He Gu is the protagonist and we see the world entirely through his eyes. He is a reserved man, introverted, calm and quiet, someone who doesn't like getting attention and likes to stay on the background. Part of this last detail is because of his low self steem and inferiority complex, as a result of his backstory (from he grew up to comparing himself to Song Juhan constantly). He likes to be in his bubble, hates taking risks and going outside his comfort zone. He also is someone who comes to a conclusion without checking facts, makes assumptions fast, stubborn and self-sacrificing (+ his devotion of SJH is another flaw lol). All of this is important to mention in order to understand that He Gu is partly an unreliable narrator. Yes, his feelings are completely valid, but the assumptions he comes to weren't right all the time.
On the other hand, we have Song Juhan. He is presented as a manchild, a person who acts before thinking, says the wrongs things at the worst times, stubborn, disrespectful and inconsiderate - but he is the best at being charming when he wants to. It makes sense for him, growing up in a rich and privileged family, always on the spotlight. Make no mistake, he will annoy the fuck out of any reader, and it's reasonable to hate him since he's such a horrible man. My feelings towards Song Juhan are the opposite though, I actually really like his character, and would even say he's now my favorite 188 gong. I always enjoy very flawed people in fiction that are well constructed, even if they are irredeemable. In theory, Song Juhan is all of them, but in practice he definitely redeemed himself for me, and I'll explain why.
I think that both are flawed characters (Song Juhan being the worst, obviously). He Gu's assumptions are some of the triggers that make their relationship change, in both good and bad ways. There are many times when he thinks the worst of Song Juhan, which is justifiable since he is such a bad person, but he didn't get them right all the time. Such events made Song Juhan the angriest, and this goes both ways: the assumptions Song Juhan made of He Gu were decisive for his actions -which were the absolutely worst in most of the cases. There's also the fact that Song Juhan showed himself as he was, but He Gu didn't love himself enough so he took it and decided to stick with him. It wasn't until , and I find that very symbolic.
Their dynamic could be the typical "guy who loves too much and the other guy that reciprocrates too late and repents", which isn't bad in itself (I love cliches if done well), but there is a point here where it is reversed. Who wouldn't find satisfying to see a grown man accept his mistakes, cry for an ex partner to take him back and promise to cherish them this time? I enjoyed it a lot, and I felt that that everything Song Juhan went through later was necessary for him to grow.
The thing I love about them the most is that ultimately, both had an organic character development and . Song Juhan in particular: . I also like that He Gu became an active participant of his own life and accepted he had the agency to walk away during the first stages and should've done so a long time ago. But he decided to ignore the warnings. Thankfully everything came to his own volition at the end, and he chose what he wanted and felt it was best according to his feelings.
Many people might say Song Juhan didn't deserve anything good after hurting He Gu so much and I agree. Does he deserve He Hu? Not really. Would He Gu be better off without him? Probably. But not Song Juhan. He could never take it. It's definitely not a healthy dynamic overall, considering everything He Gu endured (part of it willingly, the rest was forced upon him), but I feel great thinking about He Gu reclaiming power and putting himself first. I also enjoy when a shou has a gong on a leash and the gong does everything for him because of how obsessed he is so yup, it's my type of fictional dynamic for sure lol.
Overall, I'm very impressed with this novel. I loved the writting and the pacing, although both characters exasperated me at different points of the story, I ended up loving both individually and together, no matter that one is more mentally fucked up than the other. I found the extras very nice as well. Possibly the best ending I could think for them, considering I was rooting for He Gu to find happiness.
Tags: (might miss some of them)
-POV: third person
-Content warnings:
-Elements:
-Dynamic:
Now THIS is how you do a great chasing crematorium. It has the most satisfying arc and ending from the 188 series for me. Heads up that it might be a long one because I have lots of thoughts and that this review is about the novel.
It tells the story of He Gu, a man in his late 20s that has a tumultuous dynamic with the popular singer Song Juhan. He Gu goes through his daily life overworking himself for a big company and feeling lonely, unless Song Juhan communicates with him. Due to his unrequited love of seven years, He Gu cannot help but do everything he wants. Meanwhile, Song Juhan thinks of He Gu as disposable and the person he feels comfortable with the most, although he treats him horribly. Both made a deal years ago about being friends with benefits. For He Gu, that was enough - until reality hits him in the face and he'll have to choose between putting himself first or stay intoxicated.
This book can be summed up with the metaphoric lines about He Gu being drunk in love for many years, and finally sobering up once he stopped. However, unlike many readers that (rightfully) hate on Song Juhan and think of He Gu as someone without fault, I want to offer a bit of a different perspective on that.
First, it's necessary to speak about the characters. He Gu is the protagonist and we see the world entirely through his eyes. He is a reserved man, introverted, calm and quiet, someone who doesn't like getting attention and likes to stay on the background. Part of this last detail is because of his low self steem and inferiority complex, as a result of his backstory (from he grew up to comparing himself to Song Juhan constantly). He likes to be in his bubble, hates taking risks and going outside his comfort zone. He also is someone who comes to a conclusion without checking facts, makes assumptions fast, stubborn and self-sacrificing (+ his devotion of SJH is another flaw lol). All of this is important to mention in order to understand that He Gu is partly an unreliable narrator. Yes, his feelings are completely valid, but the assumptions he comes to weren't right all the time.
On the other hand, we have Song Juhan. He is presented as a manchild, a person who acts before thinking, says the wrongs things at the worst times, stubborn, disrespectful and inconsiderate - but he is the best at being charming when he wants to. It makes sense for him, growing up in a rich and privileged family, always on the spotlight. Make no mistake, he will annoy the fuck out of any reader, and it's reasonable to hate him since he's such a horrible man. My feelings towards Song Juhan are the opposite though, I actually really like his character, and would even say he's now my favorite 188 gong. I always enjoy very flawed people in fiction that are well constructed, even if they are irredeemable. In theory, Song Juhan is all of them, but in practice he definitely redeemed himself for me, and I'll explain why.
I think that both are flawed characters (Song Juhan being the worst, obviously). He Gu's assumptions are some of the triggers that make their relationship change, in both good and bad ways. There are many times when he thinks the worst of Song Juhan, which is justifiable since he is such a bad person, but he didn't get them right all the time. Such events made Song Juhan the angriest, and this goes both ways: the assumptions Song Juhan made of He Gu were decisive for his actions -which were the absolutely worst in most of the cases. There's also the fact that Song Juhan showed himself as he was, but He Gu didn't love himself enough so he took it and decided to stick with him. It wasn't until , and I find that very symbolic.
Their dynamic could be the typical "guy who loves too much and the other guy that reciprocrates too late and repents", which isn't bad in itself (I love cliches if done well), but there is a point here where it is reversed. Who wouldn't find satisfying to see a grown man accept his mistakes, cry for an ex partner to take him back and promise to cherish them this time? I enjoyed it a lot, and I felt that that everything Song Juhan went through later was necessary for him to grow.
The thing I love about them the most is that ultimately, both had an organic character development and . Song Juhan in particular: . I also like that He Gu became an active participant of his own life and accepted he had the agency to walk away during the first stages and should've done so a long time ago. But he decided to ignore the warnings. Thankfully everything came to his own volition at the end, and he chose what he wanted and felt it was best according to his feelings.
Many people might say Song Juhan didn't deserve anything good after hurting He Gu so much and I agree. Does he deserve He Hu? Not really. Would He Gu be better off without him? Probably. But not Song Juhan. He could never take it. It's definitely not a healthy dynamic overall, considering everything He Gu endured (part of it willingly, the rest was forced upon him), but I feel great thinking about He Gu reclaiming power and putting himself first. I also enjoy when a shou has a gong on a leash and the gong does everything for him because of how obsessed he is so yup, it's my type of fictional dynamic for sure lol.
Overall, I'm very impressed with this novel. I loved the writting and the pacing, although both characters exasperated me at different points of the story, I ended up loving both individually and together, no matter that one is more mentally fucked up than the other. I found the extras very nice as well. Possibly the best ending I could think for them, considering I was rooting for He Gu to find happiness.
Tags: (might miss some of them)
-POV: third person
-Content warnings:
-Elements:
-Dynamic:
Read
January 23, 2023So art is beautiful but idk what to rate this I kinda dnfef
September 12, 2024
i wanted to read a wife chasing crematorium with a toxic scum gong and this was exactly it, so im convinced all the low ratings are from people who don't even like reading this particular genre. READ THE TAGS this is not a wholesome pure romance. and furthermore this author is known for writing this type of dog blood plots. i love the MC's level of self awareness in assessing his relationship with ML. he wasn't delusional at all and had none of that "i can fix him, i'm not like the others" bs so it was very refreshing to read. the only thing i have an issue with is
January 14, 2025
ciertamente tuve miedo de leer esta novela y realmente durante los siete años que he gu se la pasó recibiendo migajas por un amor no correspondido fue difícil de digerir y song juhan seguía sin ayudar. fue una buena lectura, me gusta que haya girado en torno al mundo del espectáculo y un cantante bastante popular por lo cual la confesión es la más hermosa que he leído del grupo 188, era lo mínimo que he gu se merecía en realidad. me hubiera gustado leer momentos más dulces, ya que es la dinámica de pareja que me gusta al fin y al cabo...... te entiendo he gu, yo también hubiera perdonado a esa belleza de raza mixta
December 22, 2022
Song juhan mi archienemigo, la historia de esta escoria me atrapo por completo me provoco tanta frustración tanto enojo que fue muy disfrutable, he gu merecía más, no senti un cambio ni arrepentimiento solo manipulación y un gran berriche por parte de juhan el final te deja con un extraño sabor de boca y una pregunta de , enserio pensaba matarse de hambre si no volvia he gu ? O solo fue su manipulación como vimos en toda la novela?
Como siempre los extras muy dulces y disfrutables cómo amo a la autora su manera de escribir me atrapa en cada momento
Como siempre los extras muy dulces y disfrutables cómo amo a la autora su manera de escribir me atrapa en cada momento
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 12, 2022
2.5/5 whyyyy I also wanted to ask why you get back to him. ตอนแรกก็ว่าจะ 4 ดาว อ่านจนตอนจบ ก็กลับมารักกันเฉย รู้สึกโกรธนายเอก 555 คือพระเอกชั่วมาก ตั้งแต่ต้นจนจบ สร้องแต่ปัญหาแต่ไม่รู้จักแก้ ถึงเวลาพ่อจัดการ แล้วบังคับ ข่มขืน ข่มขู่ นายเอกให้อยู่กับตัวเอง คือตอนแรกๆสนุกนะ สนุกมาก แต่หลังๆคือแบบรับนิสัยพระเอกไม่ไหวจริงๆ
May 4, 2025
• the whole time i was like “hegu get up don’t be weak on the knees” and unfortunately he liked the floor.
• i’ve got to admit it, that’s how some relationships work cause both sides can overcome multiple challenges or forgive each other (hegu didn’t do anything wrong tho he’s just dumb) and stick together somewhat 🫲🏽😀🫱🏽 not healthy but it works i guess.
• i’ve got to admit it, that’s how some relationships work cause both sides can overcome multiple challenges or forgive each other (hegu didn’t do anything wrong tho he’s just dumb) and stick together somewhat 🫲🏽😀🫱🏽 not healthy but it works i guess.
February 18, 2022
This is me when I realised I read that this Manhua has a toxic idol who has a poor lad simping for him…
November 15, 2024
DEOS esta novela me cabreo tanto justo como las grandes escorias. Al principio estaba enojada con el Shou pero luego vi que tenía el suficiente coraje para avanzar sin culpar a nadie, si quieres leer algo que te haga doler tu estómago leete años de intoxicación
October 2, 2025
First Shui Qian Cheng work and first crematorium novel. Didn't expect much since the genre is not really my cup of tea, but I liked it more than I thought I would. HE but quite angsty.
Manhua conveyed the emotions very well and the artstyle is really nice.
Manhua conveyed the emotions very well and the artstyle is really nice.
October 1, 2020
不太喜欢这个故事
June 3, 2023
Emotional rollercoaster! The toxicity of Song Juhan exceeds everyone.
June 10, 2023
I can't with all of those gongs super toxic, manipulative, and abusive... I don't care how much you say "you love him" and how obsessed you are... you are not a good partner.
August 7, 2023
I can't with all of those gongs super toxic, manipulative, and abusive... I don't care how much you say "you love him" and how obsessed you are... you are not a good partner.
October 22, 2023
异常的狗血，但水千丞大大的书基本上都这样。
而且我还吃这一套。
而且我还吃这一套。
January 5, 2024
Отлично описан абьюз. Авторка королева таких историй. Жаль, что хэ…
December 27, 2024
I think a better title for this book would be ‘Years of Bullshit.’ I’m glad I’ve finished it. It’s my least favorite book in the 188 series; even ‘Sissy’ is better.
August 12, 2025
nhất tuý kinh niên - thuỷ thiên thừa. đoạn đầu công mất dậy công tra phát rồ còn thụ nhược thụ luỵ phát điên dmmm. nhưng thra trong đống công của hệ liệt boygroup 188 thì tống cư hàn còn đỡ chán r ấy=))))) song đúng khổ thân hà cố thật nhiều đọc đoạn vừa thương vừa mắc mệt do ổng cứ tự thích luỵ thg tống kia. đoạn cuối hà cố đi rồi redemption arc của thg tống t thấy ko satisfying lắm nhưng tổng quan đọc cuốn.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 31, 2023
[Dal blog TÈ OOLONG DI MEZZANOTTE~]
Un racconto ad ambientazione moderna, germogliato fra le luci (e, soprattutto, le ombre) di quel mondo dello spettacolo in cui Song Juhan, cantante dall’innegabile talento e dal carisma prorompente, riveste il ruolo d’una sorta di luminosa stella polare, adorato com’è, da tutti, quando si trova sul palco… e, da qualcuno, dal docile e devoto compagno d’una vita He Gu, anche quando il palco se lo lascia alle spalle.
Una narrazione, quella tessuta da Shui Qian Cheng, incentrata sulle mille e più sfumature dell’Egoismo, sui danni ch’esso può causare sia a chi gli permette di prendere il controllo di sé sia a coloro che di determinati silenzi e opportunismi si ritrovano a cadere vittime – nonché, in ultimo, sull’arduo percorso di *disintossicazione* dai suoi effetti, consistano essi nell’obnubilamento d’ogni capacità di giudizio o nella difficoltà a comprendere quanto più importanti del proprio ego siano certe persone, certi affetti, certi amori.
Risultato? in circolazione…
Un racconto ad ambientazione moderna, germogliato fra le luci (e, soprattutto, le ombre) di quel mondo dello spettacolo in cui Song Juhan, cantante dall’innegabile talento e dal carisma prorompente, riveste il ruolo d’una sorta di luminosa stella polare, adorato com’è, da tutti, quando si trova sul palco… e, da qualcuno, dal docile e devoto compagno d’una vita He Gu, anche quando il palco se lo lascia alle spalle.
Una narrazione, quella tessuta da Shui Qian Cheng, incentrata sulle mille e più sfumature dell’Egoismo, sui danni ch’esso può causare sia a chi gli permette di prendere il controllo di sé sia a coloro che di determinati silenzi e opportunismi si ritrovano a cadere vittime – nonché, in ultimo, sull’arduo percorso di *disintossicazione* dai suoi effetti, consistano essi nell’obnubilamento d’ogni capacità di giudizio o nella difficoltà a comprendere quanto più importanti del proprio ego siano certe persone, certi affetti, certi amori.
Risultato? in circolazione…
Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews