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For a Glory and a Covering: A Practical Theology of Marriage
"Lord, here am I. Change him." "God, I'm trying. She started it." Common claims but they're so far from what a Christian marriage should look like. We invoke Christ at the wedding then seem to default to an alien theology afterward. In this simple and practical book, Doug Wilson offers a richer and more comprehensive theology of marriage than in his prior works. Marriage is intended to be a glorious picture of the gospel, and marriages grounded elsewhere regularly create a small hell on earth. In this book he covers headship, submission (and their counterfeits), communication, jealousy, divorce, forgiveness, growing old together, and widowhood.
175 pages, Paperback
First published November 27, 2006
57 people are currently reading
470 people want to read
About the author
Douglas Wilson
319 books4,555 followersI write in order to make the little voices in my head go away. Thus far it hasn't worked.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 55 reviews
July 6, 2010
Typical Wilson read, whereby I mean it was thoroughly thought-provoking and helpfully motivating, even if I didn't agree with every sentence.
I really appreciated his exposure of a few false dichotomies. My favorite (and the most ) was:
Update - July 6 at 9:42AM: Having finished this for the second time in six months, I would now say this is probably the best theological book on marriage I've read. I'm thinking of trying to read it at least once a year. It's that good, that Trinitarian, that convicting, and that helpful.
I really appreciated his exposure of a few false dichotomies. My favorite (and the most ) was:
Obedience and disobedience on the part of a husband does not make him a head or not a head. He is a head regardless, but he can be an obedient head or disobedient head. He can be a head who tells the truth about Christ in his sacrificial love, or he can be a head who lies about Him through selfishness, but silence is not an option. (58)
Update - July 6 at 9:42AM: Having finished this for the second time in six months, I would now say this is probably the best theological book on marriage I've read. I'm thinking of trying to read it at least once a year. It's that good, that Trinitarian, that convicting, and that helpful.
May 25, 2023
Such a thorough book on marriage!
Some of my favorite chapters in this book were
chapter 3: Jealousy, what a great Biblical theology on jealousy & how twisted we’ve had that term today chapter 7: Masculinity & Femininity, on the definitions of the terms as opposed to the terms male & female chapter 20: Food, Glorious Food, on the role of food in marriage & family life
chapter 22: Growing Old Together, I specifically enjoyed the exhortation to honor age
& chapter 23: Designed to Be Sexual, I enjoyed the bits about birth control/having kids & the likes
Highly recommend!
Some of my favorite chapters in this book were
chapter 3: Jealousy, what a great Biblical theology on jealousy & how twisted we’ve had that term today chapter 7: Masculinity & Femininity, on the definitions of the terms as opposed to the terms male & female chapter 20: Food, Glorious Food, on the role of food in marriage & family life
chapter 22: Growing Old Together, I specifically enjoyed the exhortation to honor age
& chapter 23: Designed to Be Sexual, I enjoyed the bits about birth control/having kids & the likes
Highly recommend!
August 4, 2016
Fantastic. Very engaging and insightful on a wide array of marital concerns. Filled with Scripture, Wilson's approach is nearest the godly way of things I've yet to encounter.
December 13, 2019
Good book showing how all of scripture speaks to all of marriage.
June 12, 2012
Excellent book! After reading the chapter on "Widows", I realized there are even more reasons to continue on in faithfulness as a wife and mother.
August 17, 2021
Helpful and easy reading
A good read overall. Wilson seems to tackle a lot scripture directly while also trying to see the Bible’s teaching on marriage as interconnected with all the rest of scripture. There are some aspects of his writing that seem lazy, this was adapted from some sermons and other writings he has done and I think it shows. The chapter are short and very readable, but at times I feel as though he simply says something with no qualifications and it leaves the reader with little clarity. Could have dived deeper into several things
But overall very helped and encouraged by this book.
Would be curious to hear anyone’s thoughts on Wilson’s Trinitarian theology, both very interesting and I’m not quite sure how I feel about it either.
A good read overall. Wilson seems to tackle a lot scripture directly while also trying to see the Bible’s teaching on marriage as interconnected with all the rest of scripture. There are some aspects of his writing that seem lazy, this was adapted from some sermons and other writings he has done and I think it shows. The chapter are short and very readable, but at times I feel as though he simply says something with no qualifications and it leaves the reader with little clarity. Could have dived deeper into several things
But overall very helped and encouraged by this book.
Would be curious to hear anyone’s thoughts on Wilson’s Trinitarian theology, both very interesting and I’m not quite sure how I feel about it either.
July 20, 2023
Super great! I really appreciated the chapters on Growing Old Together & Widowhood. I’ve never read a marriage book where that was brought up.
February 28, 2025
Loved it! Quick read. Helpful biblical perspective on marriage; I think beneficial to singles. Really appreciated chapter 14 on forgiveness. Would read again.
October 14, 2021
Listened to the audiobook on the Canon App
December 19, 2012
I've read a lot of Wilson's writing on marriage. In this book he aims for a "practical" theology of marriage, which implies to some degree that his earlier works weren't practical. Ironically, I found some of the "deeper" theological parts of this book the most helpful. The first Part of the book is about marriage and the nature of God, and I found Wilson's discussion of trinitarian marriage stimulating---marriage involves oneness, otherness, honor, respect, submission, and authority, all of which are found in the Godhead.
This is not Wilson's best marriage book. In fact, the chapters are so short (5 or 6 pages each) that this almost reads like the material that was cut from earlier books. (Of course, that's not at all what happened here---this book comes from a newer sermon series preached about marriage.) Also, I was unable to follow Wilson's arguments in a few places, though that could certainly be from my own thickheadedness. But I do find that Wilson will occasionally leave out portions of an argument or explanation at the expense of turning a phrase or dropping in a witty metaphor. Writing with bite and charm has its drawbacks, apparently.
This is not Wilson's best marriage book. In fact, the chapters are so short (5 or 6 pages each) that this almost reads like the material that was cut from earlier books. (Of course, that's not at all what happened here---this book comes from a newer sermon series preached about marriage.) Also, I was unable to follow Wilson's arguments in a few places, though that could certainly be from my own thickheadedness. But I do find that Wilson will occasionally leave out portions of an argument or explanation at the expense of turning a phrase or dropping in a witty metaphor. Writing with bite and charm has its drawbacks, apparently.
November 18, 2013
This is another outstanding book on marriage and practical living by Wilson. His exposition and application of Scripture to life situations is full of wisdom, grace, charity, and rigor. He keeps all his assertions grounded in Scripture and applies it to practical situations.
Feminists and egalitarians of all stripes will be mortally offended, as they should be. God is neither a feminist nor an egalitarian and His Word unreservedly destroys their worldview and asserts the law of God against all rivals.
Men are men and are called to be the head, not in the way the world thinks, but with the mind of Christ--as servant. Women are women and are to submit, not as the world thinks, but as Christ submits to the Father.
Great stuff and a short work. Highly recommended.
Feminists and egalitarians of all stripes will be mortally offended, as they should be. God is neither a feminist nor an egalitarian and His Word unreservedly destroys their worldview and asserts the law of God against all rivals.
Men are men and are called to be the head, not in the way the world thinks, but with the mind of Christ--as servant. Women are women and are to submit, not as the world thinks, but as Christ submits to the Father.
Great stuff and a short work. Highly recommended.
February 1, 2009
Own. Best nugget: Husband is the head, and the wife is his crown.
April 16, 2015
Read with wife. Some really great stuff in it!
November 8, 2023
Lots of good thoughts. My favorite chapter was "Exchanged Authority"
March 9, 2019
More patriarchalist attacks on equality and justice.
May 23, 2025
9/10.
For starters, I want to personally boycott the cover of this book. Every time I see it on my profile, I feel as though I’m reading a steamy romantasy :`/. The Audiobook cover is 10x better, imho.
Cover aside, this is an EXCELLENT book. Many of the best marriage books deliver gospel-centered, theological treatises on marriage, which orient us rightly; I have greatly benefited from these. Other not-so-good marriage books seek to work out the implications thereof and have failed to impress. DW has done in this book what no other marriage book (that I’ve read) has been able to: deliver a truly practical theology of marriage without sacrificing truth for the sake of pandering to our societal whims.
1. The “theology” was consistently grounded in Scripture and communicated in an enchanting manner.
2. The “practical” applications from Scripture were carefully worked out and articulated in an easy-to-read manner.
This would be an excellent resource for pre-marital counseling.
One new-ish concept I gleaned was that marital oneness is inherently a Trinitarian manifestation. DW’s articulation of this reality “clicked” for me. Love, service, respect, honor, submission, and understanding all flow from the relationship between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. This has given me a lot to ponder regarding man/woman being made in God’s image and how that image is being restored through Christ. And marriage echoes the “mystery hidden for ages,” representing the love between Christ and His people by which we experience/participate in the eternal love of the Trinity.
There are some minor points of contention that I am still working through for my lack of understanding, but that does not detract from my immense gratitude for this work here and now.
So many note-worthy quotables, but I’ll reserve to share this one for men:
“Obedience and disobedience on the part of a husband does not make him a head or not a head. He is a head regardless, but he can be an obedient head or disobedient head. He can be a head who tells the truth about Christ in his sacrificial love, or he can be a head who lies about Him through selfishness, but silence is not an option”
For starters, I want to personally boycott the cover of this book. Every time I see it on my profile, I feel as though I’m reading a steamy romantasy :`/. The Audiobook cover is 10x better, imho.
Cover aside, this is an EXCELLENT book. Many of the best marriage books deliver gospel-centered, theological treatises on marriage, which orient us rightly; I have greatly benefited from these. Other not-so-good marriage books seek to work out the implications thereof and have failed to impress. DW has done in this book what no other marriage book (that I’ve read) has been able to: deliver a truly practical theology of marriage without sacrificing truth for the sake of pandering to our societal whims.
1. The “theology” was consistently grounded in Scripture and communicated in an enchanting manner.
2. The “practical” applications from Scripture were carefully worked out and articulated in an easy-to-read manner.
This would be an excellent resource for pre-marital counseling.
One new-ish concept I gleaned was that marital oneness is inherently a Trinitarian manifestation. DW’s articulation of this reality “clicked” for me. Love, service, respect, honor, submission, and understanding all flow from the relationship between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. This has given me a lot to ponder regarding man/woman being made in God’s image and how that image is being restored through Christ. And marriage echoes the “mystery hidden for ages,” representing the love between Christ and His people by which we experience/participate in the eternal love of the Trinity.
There are some minor points of contention that I am still working through for my lack of understanding, but that does not detract from my immense gratitude for this work here and now.
So many note-worthy quotables, but I’ll reserve to share this one for men:
“Obedience and disobedience on the part of a husband does not make him a head or not a head. He is a head regardless, but he can be an obedient head or disobedient head. He can be a head who tells the truth about Christ in his sacrificial love, or he can be a head who lies about Him through selfishness, but silence is not an option”
November 4, 2022
A few things I disagreed with, but overall solid.
I didn't like the comparison between pornography in men and covetousness/consumerism in women. While both pornography usage and a lust for "things" are evil, I think it is wrong to make a simple comparison between the two evils. This may have been an oversight on the part of the author. I'm also not sure I fully buy Wilson's understanding of head coverings.
Things I liked/found interesting:
-Masculinity and femininity being *somewhat* relative. I don't normally hear such talk from staunch complimentarians.
-Rooting oneness in marriage in the Trinity. Some good points, although I found the application of "send your wife more texts when you are absent" to be a rather trite application of Jesus's sending of the Spirit/inspiration of Scripture.
-Practical rules for forgiveness and unity.
Much more I could say here. I'm sure many people will not like this book for various reasons, chief among them that the author is unabashedly complimentarian, but I found it helpful.
I didn't like the comparison between pornography in men and covetousness/consumerism in women. While both pornography usage and a lust for "things" are evil, I think it is wrong to make a simple comparison between the two evils. This may have been an oversight on the part of the author. I'm also not sure I fully buy Wilson's understanding of head coverings.
Things I liked/found interesting:
-Masculinity and femininity being *somewhat* relative. I don't normally hear such talk from staunch complimentarians.
-Rooting oneness in marriage in the Trinity. Some good points, although I found the application of "send your wife more texts when you are absent" to be a rather trite application of Jesus's sending of the Spirit/inspiration of Scripture.
-Practical rules for forgiveness and unity.
Much more I could say here. I'm sure many people will not like this book for various reasons, chief among them that the author is unabashedly complimentarian, but I found it helpful.
June 9, 2022
Another excellent book by Doug Wilson. He brings clarity to
Two issues I’ve wrestled with for years:
a biblical view of family planning and biblical love and respect within marriage. I have always heard men need respect and women need love, but that is vague and I never understood how it played out in day to day interactions. In For a Glory and a Covering, Wilson discusses how to love your wife and respect your husband in a practical way.
I’m still a little unclear about his view of divorce since that chapter is very brief. I am also not sure I understand or agree with what he says about forgiveness being a transaction and only possible when both people are willing.
I do, however, really like the “house rules” for keeping short accounts he presents in the chapter about forgiveness.
Definitely a book I recommend reading!
Two issues I’ve wrestled with for years:
a biblical view of family planning and biblical love and respect within marriage. I have always heard men need respect and women need love, but that is vague and I never understood how it played out in day to day interactions. In For a Glory and a Covering, Wilson discusses how to love your wife and respect your husband in a practical way.
I’m still a little unclear about his view of divorce since that chapter is very brief. I am also not sure I understand or agree with what he says about forgiveness being a transaction and only possible when both people are willing.
I do, however, really like the “house rules” for keeping short accounts he presents in the chapter about forgiveness.
Definitely a book I recommend reading!
April 25, 2022
I really appreciated reading Pastor Wilson's thoughts on marriage. My favorite parts were his explanations of how marriage is a reflection of Christ and the Church and how marriage is inherently Trinitarian. There is a lot of godly wisdom in here, but I have to comment that I felt his explanation of why he does not believe women should wear head coverings to be poor. Hopefully I will read more of his view on 1 Corinthians 11 in the future to get a better perspective, but he did not fully explain it here.
April 24, 2024
To be honest, I am a reluctant witness, as I consider Doug Wilson to exhibit problematic behaviours online and in his public persona.
But! What a good book. Excellent, clear. Contains the best, most comprehensive, multi-faceted, 5D, profound, and respectful explanation of masculinity and femininity that I have come across.
I sincerely wish that Mr. Wilson would reconsider his online and public exhibitions, which serve only to deafen the ears of many in my generation and younger, who would hugely benefit from his works on the family.
But! What a good book. Excellent, clear. Contains the best, most comprehensive, multi-faceted, 5D, profound, and respectful explanation of masculinity and femininity that I have come across.
I sincerely wish that Mr. Wilson would reconsider his online and public exhibitions, which serve only to deafen the ears of many in my generation and younger, who would hugely benefit from his works on the family.
March 24, 2022
Even though Wilson has written a lot of books on the topic of marriage he always manages to stay fresh with his perspectives on the topic. The way he knits together seemingly unrelated Scripture passages and doctrinal truths with his teaching on marriage is fascinating, and it really delves into the depths of what marriage truly is. His books are filled with great humor as well, which makes the reading experience even more worthwhile.
Read
May 25, 2022I read this because I had heard so many terrible times things about the about the author that I wanted to see for myself if he was as bad as people say.
He holds an unashamedly patriarchal view of marriage and family, but his book was not a brash as his online presence. There were a few times that I didn’t agree with what he said but not on major theological points.
He holds an unashamedly patriarchal view of marriage and family, but his book was not a brash as his online presence. There were a few times that I didn’t agree with what he said but not on major theological points.
May 4, 2017
Wilson, though brash at times (which, in fact, I have grown to love about his writing) is ALWAYS firmly planted in biblical truth. He does not shy away from what the Bible ACTUALLY SAYS. I cannot say the same for many theologians today.
Bravo.
Bravo.
October 26, 2023
A lot of good things to say. A couple things that felt like a bit of a stretch, but I want to look into more. All in all, a practical book on marriage and just life in general, as he says in the early chapters. Useful info for more than just marriage.
August 9, 2017
Great book by Wilson. In classic Wilson style he pulls no punches and is unafraid of speaking the truth even on controversial issues.
February 7, 2019
I think this is a collection of sermon notes formed into a book. Definitely worth reading, but some parts were dry, and other parts had amazing marriage advice.
Read
November 18, 2019For a Glory and a Covering is not currently available at local libraries.
February 23, 2021
This is the best marriage book I’ve ever read! I listened on the Canon Press app, and midway through I bought a physical copy so I can go through it again immediately.
December 9, 2021
A marriage book steeped in Biblical exposition. Doug Wilson is one of a kind, and his perspective is worth diving into.
April 28, 2022
Best modern book on marriage out there 👌 Thank you for adressing intimacy, the trinity, head covering, family planning and widowhood.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 55 reviews