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Kinds of Love
Friendship, marriage, and intertwined lives in a small New Hampshire town. Christina Chapman and her husband Cornelius, both past seventy, are "summer people"―people who come to rural New England for the summer months and go home to the city when the cold weather comes. This year, however, Christina and Cornelius have decided to stay on.
May Sarton's Willard is a small town in the rocky hills of New Hampshire, a place that attracts "the untameable, the wild, the gentle." As Sarton takes us into the lives of the people who live there, we encounter a rich tapestry of characters and relationships. In the center are the deep, prickly friendship between Christina, an old Bostonian, and Ellen, the daughter of a farmer, and the unfolding process by which Christina and her husband "come into their own" in their marriage and become winter people at last.
May Sarton's Willard is a small town in the rocky hills of New Hampshire, a place that attracts "the untameable, the wild, the gentle." As Sarton takes us into the lives of the people who live there, we encounter a rich tapestry of characters and relationships. In the center are the deep, prickly friendship between Christina, an old Bostonian, and Ellen, the daughter of a farmer, and the unfolding process by which Christina and her husband "come into their own" in their marriage and become winter people at last.
466 pages, Paperback
First published December 31, 1970
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320 people want to read
About the author
May Sarton
151 books607 followersMay Sarton was born on May 3, 1912, in Wondelgem, Belgium, and grew up in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Her first volume of poetry, Encounters in April, was published in 1937 and her first novel, The Single Hound, in 1938. An accomplished memoirist, Sarton boldly came out as a lesbian in her 1965 book Mrs. Stevens Hears the Mermaids Singing. Her later memoir, Journal of a Solitude, was an account of her experiences as a female artist. Sarton died in York, Maine, on July 16, 1995.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 36 reviews
October 12, 2015
Added 10/12/15.
I read this book sometime in the 1990's. It was first published in 1970. I have just now come across the quotes which I copied from the book. They are done in my own longhand writing and there are almost 14 pages of these notes!
The author, May Sarton, had a sharp mind. She had an ability to express so much deep wisdom about life in beautiful prose. I'm amazed as I re-read my notes! Such wisdom! For example, below is a quote from page 32:
===============================
"So it is being together that matters, not any longer what we may say or not say."
===============================
That thought is so deep and so true and it is expressed in such a simple way.
May Sarton was indeed a philosopher; she had a deep grasp of what it means to be a human being, with all our varied experiences and their effects on our psyches.
I'm so glad I saved these notes.
I read this book sometime in the 1990's. It was first published in 1970. I have just now come across the quotes which I copied from the book. They are done in my own longhand writing and there are almost 14 pages of these notes!
The author, May Sarton, had a sharp mind. She had an ability to express so much deep wisdom about life in beautiful prose. I'm amazed as I re-read my notes! Such wisdom! For example, below is a quote from page 32:
===============================
"So it is being together that matters, not any longer what we may say or not say."
===============================
That thought is so deep and so true and it is expressed in such a simple way.
May Sarton was indeed a philosopher; she had a deep grasp of what it means to be a human being, with all our varied experiences and their effects on our psyches.
I'm so glad I saved these notes.
October 23, 2016
Recommended by a Macalester College prof, I chose this book, because coming-of-age stories just no longer interest me--I must be getting old :-) Better to read about a couple who are over seventy-years-old and still learning about their world! I'm betting May Sarton's book, published in 1970, is one that was read by popular novelists Jan Karon and Barbara Kingsolver--I see so many similarities among the three women in what they choose to write about and in their reflective writing styles. The book's setting, a fictitious New Hampshire burg named Willard, is small-town America at its best.
July 22, 2014
The setting is a small country village in New Hampshire called Willard. The people of the town are organizing a bicentennial celebration of their town. There’s some tension between families with money and others who are dirt poor. Only a few can send their children to college. But there is a stability to their existence, as neighbors help each other survive in times of trouble, and the rich do not have fewer problems than the poor. All kinds of love are called for. One must love the alcoholic, the young man who is severely depressed, and the cantankerous old man who lives alone. Newcomers have a hard time achieving acceptance. It is a challenge for everyone to get through the harsh winters.
I suppose I like the book so much because I grew up in an isolated country (as opposed to city) area in N. Dakota where we had the same sort of brutal winters. We, too, were self-sustaining, living off our land. My mother went to a supermarket about twice a year, for flour and sugar. I don’t remember being “needy” at all. I’m sure I wasn’t. The author can make a small, unknown corner of the world into a place you’d like to know. One character prays, “Dear God, keep us tough, ornery, and self-reliant enough to live here.” AMEN! --Lydia
I suppose I like the book so much because I grew up in an isolated country (as opposed to city) area in N. Dakota where we had the same sort of brutal winters. We, too, were self-sustaining, living off our land. My mother went to a supermarket about twice a year, for flour and sugar. I don’t remember being “needy” at all. I’m sure I wasn’t. The author can make a small, unknown corner of the world into a place you’d like to know. One character prays, “Dear God, keep us tough, ornery, and self-reliant enough to live here.” AMEN! --Lydia
October 23, 2012
I read this book many times when I was in my early 20s and identified with the young granddaughter that shows up at the end, although I loved the whole story. Over 30 years later I love book even more and absolutely identify with the elderly friends. This book explores many different types of relationships with dignity and respect. An all time favorite.
November 23, 2008
I read this book in one long sitting. I have never or most likely will never pick up a 350 page great novel and read it in one sitting.
February 13, 2020
Christina and Cornelius Chapman have been “summer people,” visiting Willard, New Hampshire each summer for decades, but in the town’s bicentennial year they decide to commit to it full-time. They have always been seen as incomers by the tough mountain people, but Cornelius’s stroke and their adjustments to his disability and older age have given them the resilience they need to make it through a hard winter. Sarton lovingly builds up pictures of the townsfolk (“one of the fascinating things about Willard was that every time you talked to a different person you got a different view. It was like turning a kaleidoscope in your hands”): Ellen Comstock, Christina’s gruff friend; Nick, Ellen’s mentally troubled son, who’s committed to protecting the local flora and fauna; Jane Tuttle, an ancient botanist; and so on.
It’s a meandering novel pleasant for its atmosphere and its working out of philosophies of life through conversation and rumination, but Part Three, “A Stranger Comes to Willard,” feels like a misstep. A college dropout named Joel Smith turns up at Ellen’s door after his car turns over in a blizzard. Before he’s drafted into the Vietnam War, he has time to fall in love with Christina’s granddaughter, Cathy, who’s been living with them. There may only be a few years between the teens, but it still worried me that Cathy is only 15 and Christina and Cornelius decide to be completely hands-off about the relationship.
Willard is clearly a version of Sarton’s beloved Nelson, NH, so as the bicentennial celebration draws nearer she’s exploring love for the land as well as love between romantic partners and within families. I liked how each third-person omniscient chapter ends with a passage from Christina’s journal, making things personal and echoing the sort of self-reflective writing for which Sarton became most famous. I think the book could have been close to 300 pages instead of over 460, though.
Love-ly words:
“when two people have shared a life for many years, … the most important things never get said in words.”
“marriages are like plants—they have their hard years when it seems like they’ll never bear another flower, just look so puny and worn out. And then—you can’t tell why, but that bush suddenly perks up.”
[Ouch! Here’s what the New York Times Book Review had to say about the novel when it first came out: “This novel, flawed in style and flabby in content, is filled with characters but it does not bring the reader in to share the depth of their experiences. There is much potentially fascinating but Sarton leaves us on the outside. Perhaps the flaw is that she tells us of feelings rather than showing us. With the exception of Ellen Comstock, the characters do not come alive. … It reads like a book intended for a private printing in the sense that Sarton assumes by her style that the reader already knows the people and events she portrays.”]
It’s a meandering novel pleasant for its atmosphere and its working out of philosophies of life through conversation and rumination, but Part Three, “A Stranger Comes to Willard,” feels like a misstep. A college dropout named Joel Smith turns up at Ellen’s door after his car turns over in a blizzard. Before he’s drafted into the Vietnam War, he has time to fall in love with Christina’s granddaughter, Cathy, who’s been living with them. There may only be a few years between the teens, but it still worried me that Cathy is only 15 and Christina and Cornelius decide to be completely hands-off about the relationship.
Willard is clearly a version of Sarton’s beloved Nelson, NH, so as the bicentennial celebration draws nearer she’s exploring love for the land as well as love between romantic partners and within families. I liked how each third-person omniscient chapter ends with a passage from Christina’s journal, making things personal and echoing the sort of self-reflective writing for which Sarton became most famous. I think the book could have been close to 300 pages instead of over 460, though.
Love-ly words:
“when two people have shared a life for many years, … the most important things never get said in words.”
“marriages are like plants—they have their hard years when it seems like they’ll never bear another flower, just look so puny and worn out. And then—you can’t tell why, but that bush suddenly perks up.”
[Ouch! Here’s what the New York Times Book Review had to say about the novel when it first came out: “This novel, flawed in style and flabby in content, is filled with characters but it does not bring the reader in to share the depth of their experiences. There is much potentially fascinating but Sarton leaves us on the outside. Perhaps the flaw is that she tells us of feelings rather than showing us. With the exception of Ellen Comstock, the characters do not come alive. … It reads like a book intended for a private printing in the sense that Sarton assumes by her style that the reader already knows the people and events she portrays.”]
November 29, 2011
The mountains of New England are the setting for the mythical village of Willard. The story unfolds around the long, sometimes fierce friendship between Local Ellen and Summer Person Christina. An old, scrabbled place with Locals and Summer People. Sarton created a marvelous place to explore kinds of love.....old, young, confused, transitory and enduring. The novel is full of thought provoking conversations and exerpts from Christina's diary: "What is interesting, after all, is the making of a self, an act of creation like any other, that does imply a certain amount of conscious work." (p. 32) One of Sarton's genious' is how her characters create more conscious relationships both within and between themselves. I appreciated how her work also touched on mild sons of tyrannt fathers (p. 54) and the difference in Men and Women's grief and how they experience feelings (p. 90)Chrisitna's observation on page 121 on how long term relationships do not depend on words as new relationship do was interesting. Christina and Cornelius eplore the sadness and the unexpected joys of getting old, while Cathy and Joel experience the sharp intensities and dissatisfactions of nascent youth. It is my first and still my favorite novel by May Sarton. Reading Sarton awakened me to a clearer understanding, and therefore consious participation in experiencing feelings in relationship. Reading May Sarton opened the door for me to later read and anjoy Jane Austen, Diane Setterfiled, and to a lesser degree Margret Atwood. I understand why Joel was awakened by the puissant silence of the mountains hosting Willard, secret histories that matter and savoring the wild fires of relationship. "The silence opened up, opened up the farthest line of woods, the hills,opened up the sky- it was huge. It seemed to absorb love and grief and parting into some great whole." p. 399
December 31, 2015
I found this book in Volume 1 of the 1971 Reader's Digest Condensed Books, which I had stored for many years in my basement. Since I had enjoyed other books by May Sarton, I decided to keep this volume until I had read Kinds of Love. I was nearly halfway through when I discovered a note I had written in the margin. This note told me I had read the book for the first time about 25 years ago.
I don't remember finding typos or subject/verb disagreement in other books by this author, but I found one of each in this book. Perhaps those things were a result of the Reader's Digest Condensation, but I think Reader's Digest is generally very good with their editing.
The author is very good with her descriptions of places and people. I felt as if I knew the characters and would recognize them on the street.
The title of the book is appropriate since the author has written about many kinds of love in this book, e.g. love of parents for their children and later their grandchildren, love awakening in a teenage girl, love of neighbors, love of a town and its history, love of hard work, love of nature, rediscovered love of a couple for each other after being married for many years, and a first love that still has sparks after many years have past.
I don't remember finding typos or subject/verb disagreement in other books by this author, but I found one of each in this book. Perhaps those things were a result of the Reader's Digest Condensation, but I think Reader's Digest is generally very good with their editing.
The author is very good with her descriptions of places and people. I felt as if I knew the characters and would recognize them on the street.
The title of the book is appropriate since the author has written about many kinds of love in this book, e.g. love of parents for their children and later their grandchildren, love awakening in a teenage girl, love of neighbors, love of a town and its history, love of hard work, love of nature, rediscovered love of a couple for each other after being married for many years, and a first love that still has sparks after many years have past.
March 19, 2016
I kept hoping something would happen in this book to justify the sober, thoughtful exposition of its elderly narrator. Such a laid back, careful, understated yet prolix analysis of various minor details! Now and then an "event" of some moment interrupts the gentle day-to-day progress of a backwoods New England village, but even these small excitements are dwarfed by the prosy consideration of a deep thinker. Thoughts of class distinctions, of sublimated sex, of frustration and vengeance all simmer gently in a goopy stew of careful good old home-cooked niceness. Ugh! Can't believe I read the whole thing! Why did this book show up in my house? Wish I could unread it.
April 6, 2010
The relationship with nature, aging, and the lack of freedom both wealth and poverty bring are deftly woven into this lovely novel. Lovely turn of phrases and exploration of interior thoughts and feelings. This was originally published when I was a babe in arms. It is astounding to think how dramatically lives have changed in the interim. I think. Does the level of poverty described by Sarton still exist in New England in the same way?
March 24, 2011
I enjoyed this book. There is something cozy about being part of a town like the one Sarton creates. It was also interesting to hear Sarton's voice so strongly in a fiction work. I've read most of her journals and she has a distinct, emotional and strong voice. I was sad to see this book end.
March 18, 2013
This was an interesting story - with interesting characters and a rich setting. I liked the way the country of Willard was also a character in this story. As I was reading, I could "feel" the geography of this place and it was easy to care for the characters.
July 13, 2016
As a small country town prepares to celebrate it's bicentennial the relationships within the community are examined. I loved the gently meandering style of this novel, the rich wisdom of the author's keen observations of human nature and the wonderful evocation of the landscape.
April 19, 2016
I've not read May Sarton before and wasn't sure if I'd like her work. This is a book about place primarily and about the people in that place. After that it's a book about love spanning young love to very old love.
December 29, 2007
This is my least favorite Sarton novel to date. I did appreciate her insight on love and found her belief in the many ways one can love to be very progressive.
February 16, 2014
book about New England lives. one of her best novels.
June 12, 2015
Just couldn't get into this story.
March 30, 2016
keenly observant and occasionally thoughtful, but definitely a more slow-paced read than I'm used to.
Read
March 8, 2026Speaking of Nick: "The only anger to fear is the anger of a gentle man."
"A man's tears are no relief to him, unlike a woman's. They tear their way out of an open wound."
"... the true wisdom of a failure. He stands outside and looks us all over -- we who have everything he hasn't got -- and he feels no envy because he likes his life. He has chosen it. He is, in a strange way, the freest spirit in Willard, because, I suppose, he has nothing to lose."
After Jane Tuttle died, John was sitting before her chair: "Pure love, he thought, inhabited this house, so for once there is no guilt .. She never asked anyhing -- never expected more of people than they could give, and wanted of them only what they could be, not what she herself might need."
John: "Sometimes I think every meeting between two human beings is a collision."
Cornelius: "You know women are very personal, Elen. That is their great quality, and I sometimes think their one defect. Sometimes I feel cooped up. It would be a real boon if you dropped in now and then, and we could talk - about politics, for instance."
Eben: "Ellen would worry if she were in heaven with God's hand on her shoulder. Worrying keeps her alive."
Eben: "Don't look into mirrors, look into people's eyes. ... After a certain age, mirrors lie."
Christina, in her journal, after the arrival of Joel: "It is just not a loving world full of gentle souls who do not have to work for a living, and to wish to make it so leaves out too much. As it leaves out too much, I feel, to make an ideal of love without responsibility."
I think that all of Sarton's characters represent facets of herself, and that's why they're authentic -- because each facet is authentic in her self, and each has its point of view.
At one point Christina is talking to Ellen about the younger generation and young women who never bake beans in an oven but rather buy them in cans. Ellen says it's good because "It gives them time to read, time to play too." Christina responds: "But is it better to work all day in a telephone office like Sarah and earn enough to buy canned food rather than grow it as their father did and cook it as you do?"
"A man's tears are no relief to him, unlike a woman's. They tear their way out of an open wound."
"... the true wisdom of a failure. He stands outside and looks us all over -- we who have everything he hasn't got -- and he feels no envy because he likes his life. He has chosen it. He is, in a strange way, the freest spirit in Willard, because, I suppose, he has nothing to lose."
After Jane Tuttle died, John was sitting before her chair: "Pure love, he thought, inhabited this house, so for once there is no guilt .. She never asked anyhing -- never expected more of people than they could give, and wanted of them only what they could be, not what she herself might need."
John: "Sometimes I think every meeting between two human beings is a collision."
Cornelius: "You know women are very personal, Elen. That is their great quality, and I sometimes think their one defect. Sometimes I feel cooped up. It would be a real boon if you dropped in now and then, and we could talk - about politics, for instance."
Eben: "Ellen would worry if she were in heaven with God's hand on her shoulder. Worrying keeps her alive."
Eben: "Don't look into mirrors, look into people's eyes. ... After a certain age, mirrors lie."
Christina, in her journal, after the arrival of Joel: "It is just not a loving world full of gentle souls who do not have to work for a living, and to wish to make it so leaves out too much. As it leaves out too much, I feel, to make an ideal of love without responsibility."
I think that all of Sarton's characters represent facets of herself, and that's why they're authentic -- because each facet is authentic in her self, and each has its point of view.
At one point Christina is talking to Ellen about the younger generation and young women who never bake beans in an oven but rather buy them in cans. Ellen says it's good because "It gives them time to read, time to play too." Christina responds: "But is it better to work all day in a telephone office like Sarah and earn enough to buy canned food rather than grow it as their father did and cook it as you do?"
June 12, 2020
This book was written fifty years ago, so I don't even know if it's in print anymore. If it isn't, it should be. It's as relevant now as it was then in terms of interpersonal relationships. The story is set in a small town in New Hampshire and takes place over the course of a single year, 1969, the bicentennial of the town. In honor of that, the town is having a celebration and members of the celebration committee are writing a book about the history of the town. There are now two distinct influences in town, the locals, some of whom can trace their roots back the entire 200 years, and the rich summer residents, primarily from Boston. Many of them have been coming since shortly after the Civil War. This story centers on the relationship between Christina, one of the rich summer residents, and Ellen, a townie. They have been friends for sixty plus years. Other characters are Christina's husband, who recently suffered a stroke, Ellen's son, who suffers from PTSD from his time in WWII (although it's not called that in the book), Even, a townie who is also wealthy, so manages to bridge the gap between the two cultures, Christina's 15 year old granddaughter, who comes to live with them for a spring semester, and a young Dartmouth dropout, who has a lot to say about the Vietnam War, weed, and other pertinent young adult topics from 1969. The power of the book is in the dialogs, in the discussions and in the deep caring that takes place between characters. There's true anger and injustice, but also great love that transcends class. In the back of my copy the book is classified as fiction/women's studies but I think that is far too limiting. Why should only women care about interpersonal relationships? As a read the book I was struck by the realization that in 1969 I was younger than Cathy, the granddaughter, yet now, in 2020, I am almost as old as Christina. The book examines how our attitudes and feelings evolve as we age. I highly recommend it if you can find a copy.
August 22, 2017
I tried to read this book years ago and gave it up. Didn't interest me. Now I'm 70 and it seems much more relevant, though a bit dated. (People being "square" or "groovy" went out of style before the book was published in 1970!) Sarton's book, like some by Madeleine L'Engle, is ruminative, i.e. that characters' dialogue is used most often to mull over ideas from various points of view. In the context of exploring the various characters that make up a small, New England town during the Vietnam War era, Sarton explores the benefits and drawbacks of aging, the tendency of strangers to romanticize rural life and poverty (though she does more than a bit of that herself),that painful transition from childhood to adulthood when you begin to realize how complicated life is and that adults don't have all the answers - among other themes. If you want to slow your life down as I do sometimes and can tolerate Sarton's occasional descent into New England class prejudice and preciousness, the book is a restful escape from the 21st century . There is wisdom and insight here, no doubt; I was startled at times by recognizing myself in various characters, as if seeing myself as others see me. But if you're looking for action, diversity, a driving plot line,or clear-eyed realism or cynicism even, steer clear.
February 26, 2025
Interesting read which incorporated subjects of tourism, class, and war. Of course, most of these subjects were the focus of conversations cut short by "retiring" and the like-- but I think that was one of the strengths of this novel. The characters acted and talked like real people, half-formed opinions and all. It's a meandering sort of structure which makes you think more than if May Sarton explained Ellen's perspective on Christina's wealth in excruciating detail. It isn't something that Ellen would do, so it is not done.
I did not get a very good sense of time-- a good sense of age, but not a good sense of time. I also wanted more from characters like John, Nick, and even Ellen! I feel as though there was so little from Ellen and so much time spent with Christina. And on that note, I feel like there wasn't much development in Christina and Cornelius's relationship. His stroke is hard on both of them, but the changes in routine that it brings about are benignly noted as having already happened, as something they have already made their peace with. They seem to go through individual journeys, but the one thing never in doubt is their marriage-- the very thing the book insisted they were "coming into."
I did not get a very good sense of time-- a good sense of age, but not a good sense of time. I also wanted more from characters like John, Nick, and even Ellen! I feel as though there was so little from Ellen and so much time spent with Christina. And on that note, I feel like there wasn't much development in Christina and Cornelius's relationship. His stroke is hard on both of them, but the changes in routine that it brings about are benignly noted as having already happened, as something they have already made their peace with. They seem to go through individual journeys, but the one thing never in doubt is their marriage-- the very thing the book insisted they were "coming into."
February 12, 2019
A lovely story of a small New Hampshire town ready to celebrate its bicentennial and the people who have made it what it is. The town has long distinguished between the "summer people"--well to do city people who only last while the weather is mild and flee back to the city when the winter comes, and the year round natives whose families have weathered the both good weather and the more brutal winters for generations. The main characters of the story are a couple, both in their 70s and with some infirmities, who decide it is time to stick it out for the winter and become year rounders. The book is a beautiful array of stories of friendships defying the expectations of social status as they welcome outsiders to belong in this tight knit community. There is a moving exploration of many kinds of love---friendships evolving over years and years, romantic love discovered, lost and rediscovered, and parental love doing the best it can muster in the face of doubt, misunderstanding, and disappointment as they attempt to discern when it is best to be hands-on or hands-off. A very interesting read.
December 30, 2021
I really liked the tone of this book and how I felt reading it - calm, soothing, pensive, a tad melancholy. I read this book in my early twenties and while I didn't remember plot details I did remember the tone and feel.
I did think the story dragged a bit in the final third or so. I would have ranked higher otherwise.
I am inclined to try more by Sarton. I know I felt this way on the original read but never followed through. This time will be different!!
I did think the story dragged a bit in the final third or so. I would have ranked higher otherwise.
I am inclined to try more by Sarton. I know I felt this way on the original read but never followed through. This time will be different!!
March 13, 2020
There are different kinds of live; live for the place you grew up, the place you live, the place your dear ones live, your love for your children, parents, neighbors, beloved one, and your love for the life itself.
All that can't be distinguished, can't be mixed!
The important part is that you love...
All that can't be distinguished, can't be mixed!
The important part is that you love...
January 23, 2024
My brother had recommended this book to someone interested in reading a New England book and it sounded good. It takes place as a small NH town gets ready to celebrate its bicentennial in 1969. Both residents and "summer people" are encouraged to help explore the history. Relationships, resentments, jealousy and anger.
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December 30, 2020i don't know if i've written a review of this book? I've read it so many times and it always fills me with joy. it's a go -to book, along with Journal of a Solitude. Naturally i first read it in May :)
January 5, 2023
I love all of May Sarton’s books. She has a soft, thoughtful and complete approach to describing characters, settings indoors and out, that pulls the reader in. If you’ve never read Sarton, give her a try.
December 14, 2018
It read like a Norman Rockwell painting. Nice, sweet, tidy. A little mundane. Lovely descriptions. Perfectly pleasant, but without the drama or meat that I like in a book.
January 26, 2020
learning that i prefer her journal writing to her novels.
also...dreadful cover design.
also...dreadful cover design.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 36 reviews