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Groomed: Overcoming the Messages That Shaped Our Past and Limit Our Future
Someone in your past sold you a false story about who you are and what you’re worth. It has been holding you back for too long. Take control of your future.
A staggering one out of three women in America was a victim of sexual abuse at some point in her childhood. No matter how many years it’s been, if that’s your story, those scars are probably still with you. But even if that’s not part of your story, this book is for you. Women today have been groomed for a lot more than just sex.
Using her own story of abuse, family tragedy, and rebellion, Elizabeth Melendez Fisher guides readers toward an understanding that grooming is oftentimes subtle, but it’s always life-altering. In Groomed Fisher incorporates the language and lessons gained over the past decade working with sex trafficking victims and her work in ministry and counseling before that. She draws out five specific ways that women have been groomed, from physical appearance to spirituality to finances, and shows how those manipulative messages have affected the way we see our worth and how they’ve oftentimes stifled and limited us. From there Fisher offers readers a way to overcome their past, starting with the all-important but rarely explored idea of a selah, or a time of rest and reflection, and exploring active ways to forgive and move forward to a new level of freedom.
No one has to be defined by her past. No one has to live for her groomers. It’s time to take a look back at where we came from to escape the messages of our past and take control of our future.
A staggering one out of three women in America was a victim of sexual abuse at some point in her childhood. No matter how many years it’s been, if that’s your story, those scars are probably still with you. But even if that’s not part of your story, this book is for you. Women today have been groomed for a lot more than just sex.
Using her own story of abuse, family tragedy, and rebellion, Elizabeth Melendez Fisher guides readers toward an understanding that grooming is oftentimes subtle, but it’s always life-altering. In Groomed Fisher incorporates the language and lessons gained over the past decade working with sex trafficking victims and her work in ministry and counseling before that. She draws out five specific ways that women have been groomed, from physical appearance to spirituality to finances, and shows how those manipulative messages have affected the way we see our worth and how they’ve oftentimes stifled and limited us. From there Fisher offers readers a way to overcome their past, starting with the all-important but rarely explored idea of a selah, or a time of rest and reflection, and exploring active ways to forgive and move forward to a new level of freedom.
No one has to be defined by her past. No one has to live for her groomers. It’s time to take a look back at where we came from to escape the messages of our past and take control of our future.
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First published January 14, 2020
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
February 17, 2020
A powerful read and an amazing non fiction read that I learned a lot from. I think that Good’s advice are solid and do lead to a path to healing and changing our future. The stories she told are powerful and quite impactful to creating the change. Amazing book!
February 26, 2020
Elizabeth Melendez Fisher Good is a co-founder of Selah Freedom, the nation’s leading anti-sex trafficking organization. After extensively working with sex-trafficking victims Fisher Good has determined a pattern of ways that women are groomed as children by parents or influential people. In Groomed, she covers five different ways that you might have been groomed; for appearances, to be invisible, to be judgmental, to endure, or for financial fear.
While sharing the different ways that women have been groomed, Fisher Good shares her stories of grooming, abuse, and trauma. Her openness and honesty is tough and refreshing.
I read a decent amount of self help books and I was a bit hesitant to pick this one up because I was aware of Fisher Good's religious beliefs. I consider myself agnostic and do not want to be preached at. I grew up in a religious family, so I am not uncomfortable with talk of religion, but I choose not to engage in more than a surface level way.
After Fisher Good covers the different ways that you have been groomed, she asks you to sit with it for awhile. She says that if you aren't ready to confront your issues, to set the book aside and come back to is someday. If you are ready to confront your issues, then it is time to continue reading. I liked her advice at this point. She doesn't just leave the reader hanging by saying that it is time to move on and not giving any advice on how to do that.
I listened to part of the book on audio and then I switched to the physical copy because my library hold ran out. Fisher Good narrates it herself and she really does a fantastic job! I see that she has a Ted Talk and I will be listening to that soon.
While sharing the different ways that women have been groomed, Fisher Good shares her stories of grooming, abuse, and trauma. Her openness and honesty is tough and refreshing.
I read a decent amount of self help books and I was a bit hesitant to pick this one up because I was aware of Fisher Good's religious beliefs. I consider myself agnostic and do not want to be preached at. I grew up in a religious family, so I am not uncomfortable with talk of religion, but I choose not to engage in more than a surface level way.
After Fisher Good covers the different ways that you have been groomed, she asks you to sit with it for awhile. She says that if you aren't ready to confront your issues, to set the book aside and come back to is someday. If you are ready to confront your issues, then it is time to continue reading. I liked her advice at this point. She doesn't just leave the reader hanging by saying that it is time to move on and not giving any advice on how to do that.
I listened to part of the book on audio and then I switched to the physical copy because my library hold ran out. Fisher Good narrates it herself and she really does a fantastic job! I see that she has a Ted Talk and I will be listening to that soon.
January 2, 2020
When I hear the word "groomed" I do associate it to bad people. There are your pimps and abusers. Which in a way these two categories can be mutually the same. In this book author, Elizabeth explores all the ways that people are groomed. This book particularly focuses on the grooming of abusers and sheds attention on human sex trafficking.
This book is broken out into three different sections: We've all been groomed, What are you groomed for, and Leaving the life. Each section consists of multiple chapters details more about each topic. This book really makes you stop, think, and process everything you are reading. In fact, you may find yourself really parts over several times just because you are soaking in everything that you are reading.
I applaud people like Elizabeth for helping to shine attention on human sex trafficking. It is a nationally wide spread issue that more people need to be aware of. It does not just happen in other countries but in the US as well. It could even be happening in your town. Thus the training that truck drivers are receiving to help recognize signs of victims.
If you want to help, check out https://www.dhs.gov/blue-campaign/wha... or to make a report call 1-866-347-2423.
This book is broken out into three different sections: We've all been groomed, What are you groomed for, and Leaving the life. Each section consists of multiple chapters details more about each topic. This book really makes you stop, think, and process everything you are reading. In fact, you may find yourself really parts over several times just because you are soaking in everything that you are reading.
I applaud people like Elizabeth for helping to shine attention on human sex trafficking. It is a nationally wide spread issue that more people need to be aware of. It does not just happen in other countries but in the US as well. It could even be happening in your town. Thus the training that truck drivers are receiving to help recognize signs of victims.
If you want to help, check out https://www.dhs.gov/blue-campaign/wha... or to make a report call 1-866-347-2423.
dnf
March 19, 2021DNF @ ~40%
Trigger warnings:
First off - this wasn't the book I was expecting. From the narrative, I was expecting a non-fiction book that discussed the overarching grooming and impact that happens to people living within our society.
Secondly, while I appreciated some of the ideas, I honestly I ended up feeling as though I was listening to a religious white woman generalize how she dealt with her personal issues.
Please understand that I am not trying to invalidate the authors experiences. Rather, I felt that I gained little from the narrative and self-help discussion that she wove throughout the book. There was a lack of depth beyond "reflect on yourself" and that one time she was prayed for. I struggled to find any practical application or thought-provoking message as a reader.
Trigger warnings:
First off - this wasn't the book I was expecting. From the narrative, I was expecting a non-fiction book that discussed the overarching grooming and impact that happens to people living within our society.
Secondly, while I appreciated some of the ideas, I honestly I ended up feeling as though I was listening to a religious white woman generalize how she dealt with her personal issues.
Please understand that I am not trying to invalidate the authors experiences. Rather, I felt that I gained little from the narrative and self-help discussion that she wove throughout the book. There was a lack of depth beyond "reflect on yourself" and that one time she was prayed for. I struggled to find any practical application or thought-provoking message as a reader.
Note: Review copy (audio) received via Libro.FM. This does not impact opinions within this review.
blog • trigger warning database • more links
Happy reading! ❤
March 20, 2021
Very informative and inspiring. It took and lot of courage and perseverance to write this book and share the messages.
February 7, 2020
Elizabeth Melendez Fisher Good is the cofounder of Selah Freedom, one of the nation’s leading anti-sex trafficking organizations. Good teaches that sharing our secrets and personal stories with others can help people to heal from personal trauma. She also feels that messages that children receive when thy are young groom them to live lives that are not their own. In Groomed, Good shares her personal story to explore the areas where women are often groomed: for appearances, to be invisible, for judgement, to endure, or for financial fear. She explores not only how that can lead women to be sex trafficked, but how it can affect those that are not sex trafficked into leading lives that are not fully their own.
The book starts with “How Did I End Up Here” with the story of a child having a secret, one that is so deep that they can’t share it with others although it will change the direction of their life forever. This hooked me into the book and I was intrigued by the rest of the book as well. It gave me a lot to think about and I recognized myself in several parts of the book. The first three chapters of the book focus on how we’ve all been groomed. The next five chapters focus on the specifics of how we’ve been groom and the last three are how to make changes and the leave the life that is causing you harm.
In the groomed for appearance section, I recognized my Grandma. She and other members of the family were constantly remarking on the appearances of all of the girls in my family, even ranking us on our appearance and weight. I was the valedictorian of my class, but always felt unworthy as I am not a skinny beauty queen. It was just this Thanksgiving while going through her old pictures, I found an envelope with clippings about me and the awards I had won in high school. She had never told me she was proud of me, but was always criticizing my appearance. It made me sad. I realize now that was how she was raised and how her entire focus in life was to make sure she was groomed for her appearance and looking good. It was her way to help me out and love me I think to criticize, although I wish it could have been different. I really thought the quotes below from the groomed for appearance section were very thoughtful, especially this week where the news is full of the appearance of Jennifer Lopez at 50 and how the Super Bowl performance represents “Empowered Women.” I found this focus very sad and falling into the same trap for women. I don’t remember talk last year about Adam Levine doing well and looking well on the stage at his age and how it represented “Empowered Men.”
“Study after study shows that children intuitively believe what adults tell them, even if those messages contradict what they see right in front of them. Not only that, but children internalize those messages and carry them into adulthood. When boys are routinely complimented as smart and girls are told their pretty, it affects what they seek in the future.”
“Girls who were groomed for appearances often become women who don’t know how to look beneath their own surfaces.”
“Focusing too much on appearances takes all our energy and focuses it on what other people see, leaving nothing left for who we really are.”
The groomed to be invisible section sadly made me think of my other Grandma. She was groomed to be invisible, always in the background serving and never the focus of anyone. Poor Grandma. “But far too many women hover in the background because they believe this unhealthy message: You’re here to serve, not to be recognized. You don’t deserve anything more.”
While I recognized myself in many sections of the book, I realized I was groomed to endure. I am the always busy person that is always helping people and never having time just for myself. This was what my family needed from me when my parents divorced, I needed to keep everything together in both households. This has continued on to adulthood where I am now the always busy person trying to figure out how I got here. This book gave me a lot to think about and I particularly liked these quotes:
“Your friends and family know that you’re the dependable one, the reliable one, the one who will be there for anything, no questions asked. Most of the time they take you for granted – not because they are trying to hurt you but because they can’t respect your boundaries if you’ve never established any.”
“You were groomed to believe you exist to care for others, but that’s left you without space for your own needs to be met.”
This book not only gave me an insight on how people become victims of sex-trafficking, but it also gave me insight into myself and how I was “groomed” by others into who I am these days for both the positive and the negative. I think it’s a good book for all women to read.
A lot of what I liked about this book was Elizabeth Melendez Fisher Good's personal story and the story of the development of the Selah Freedom Foundation. Her candor was refreshing.
One more Favorite Quote:
“If you find yourself stuck in an endless loop of resentment or angry feelings toward a person who hurt you years ago, you’re probably spending too much time on something that can’t be changed.”
Overall, Groomed is an important book that gives insight of how people become victims of sex-trafficking, but also into how we are all “groomed” in our lives. It was a very thought-provoking book and one that I think all women should read.
Book Source: Review Copy from Thomas Nelson as a part of the TLC Book Tour!
This review was first posted on my blog at: https://lauragerold.blogspot.com/2020...
The book starts with “How Did I End Up Here” with the story of a child having a secret, one that is so deep that they can’t share it with others although it will change the direction of their life forever. This hooked me into the book and I was intrigued by the rest of the book as well. It gave me a lot to think about and I recognized myself in several parts of the book. The first three chapters of the book focus on how we’ve all been groomed. The next five chapters focus on the specifics of how we’ve been groom and the last three are how to make changes and the leave the life that is causing you harm.
In the groomed for appearance section, I recognized my Grandma. She and other members of the family were constantly remarking on the appearances of all of the girls in my family, even ranking us on our appearance and weight. I was the valedictorian of my class, but always felt unworthy as I am not a skinny beauty queen. It was just this Thanksgiving while going through her old pictures, I found an envelope with clippings about me and the awards I had won in high school. She had never told me she was proud of me, but was always criticizing my appearance. It made me sad. I realize now that was how she was raised and how her entire focus in life was to make sure she was groomed for her appearance and looking good. It was her way to help me out and love me I think to criticize, although I wish it could have been different. I really thought the quotes below from the groomed for appearance section were very thoughtful, especially this week where the news is full of the appearance of Jennifer Lopez at 50 and how the Super Bowl performance represents “Empowered Women.” I found this focus very sad and falling into the same trap for women. I don’t remember talk last year about Adam Levine doing well and looking well on the stage at his age and how it represented “Empowered Men.”
“Study after study shows that children intuitively believe what adults tell them, even if those messages contradict what they see right in front of them. Not only that, but children internalize those messages and carry them into adulthood. When boys are routinely complimented as smart and girls are told their pretty, it affects what they seek in the future.”
“Girls who were groomed for appearances often become women who don’t know how to look beneath their own surfaces.”
“Focusing too much on appearances takes all our energy and focuses it on what other people see, leaving nothing left for who we really are.”
The groomed to be invisible section sadly made me think of my other Grandma. She was groomed to be invisible, always in the background serving and never the focus of anyone. Poor Grandma. “But far too many women hover in the background because they believe this unhealthy message: You’re here to serve, not to be recognized. You don’t deserve anything more.”
While I recognized myself in many sections of the book, I realized I was groomed to endure. I am the always busy person that is always helping people and never having time just for myself. This was what my family needed from me when my parents divorced, I needed to keep everything together in both households. This has continued on to adulthood where I am now the always busy person trying to figure out how I got here. This book gave me a lot to think about and I particularly liked these quotes:
“Your friends and family know that you’re the dependable one, the reliable one, the one who will be there for anything, no questions asked. Most of the time they take you for granted – not because they are trying to hurt you but because they can’t respect your boundaries if you’ve never established any.”
“You were groomed to believe you exist to care for others, but that’s left you without space for your own needs to be met.”
This book not only gave me an insight on how people become victims of sex-trafficking, but it also gave me insight into myself and how I was “groomed” by others into who I am these days for both the positive and the negative. I think it’s a good book for all women to read.
A lot of what I liked about this book was Elizabeth Melendez Fisher Good's personal story and the story of the development of the Selah Freedom Foundation. Her candor was refreshing.
One more Favorite Quote:
“If you find yourself stuck in an endless loop of resentment or angry feelings toward a person who hurt you years ago, you’re probably spending too much time on something that can’t be changed.”
Overall, Groomed is an important book that gives insight of how people become victims of sex-trafficking, but also into how we are all “groomed” in our lives. It was a very thought-provoking book and one that I think all women should read.
Book Source: Review Copy from Thomas Nelson as a part of the TLC Book Tour!
This review was first posted on my blog at: https://lauragerold.blogspot.com/2020...
November 19, 2020
Very interesting perspective.
April 21, 2023
I had a much different opinion of this book while I was reading it versus how I felt when I was done. I think this is because the author has a very personable and relatable tone, so everything in the text is easy to connect to. However, after some reflecting, I'm disappointed by the overall content.
Elizabeth Melendez Fisher Good is an advocate for victims of sex trafficking and created an organization to help these victims back in 2011. She talks frequently in this book about the thousands of people she's helped, but according to my Internet research, she's no longer associated with the organization at all. Not sure what the falling out was but it made all of these references feel a bit odd to me.
"Groomed" does not really go into detail about the grooming that sexual predators use on their victims (which is what I thought this book would be about). It's more about different types of grooming that our parents or other authority figures impose on us. This was an interesting take on the term, but I think I would have preferred this to be a side note, and the real definition of the term to be explored in a more in-depth way.
Lastly, I got turned off by her use of religion when describing ways to escape grooming. Not everyone is religious, and many people are triggered by mentions of religion because of the ways they've been abused (often by people connected to churches and organized religion). I think more people could relate to this book if the author had chosen terms like 'higher power' or faith rather than words like God and Jesus.
I would not recommend this to victims of sexual abuse because I don't think there's enough value in the overall message. Although I tip my hat to the author telling her own personal story, this book would have been much more effective as a fact-based non-fiction take on the process of grooming.
*Free copy provided by Netgalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review*
Elizabeth Melendez Fisher Good is an advocate for victims of sex trafficking and created an organization to help these victims back in 2011. She talks frequently in this book about the thousands of people she's helped, but according to my Internet research, she's no longer associated with the organization at all. Not sure what the falling out was but it made all of these references feel a bit odd to me.
"Groomed" does not really go into detail about the grooming that sexual predators use on their victims (which is what I thought this book would be about). It's more about different types of grooming that our parents or other authority figures impose on us. This was an interesting take on the term, but I think I would have preferred this to be a side note, and the real definition of the term to be explored in a more in-depth way.
Lastly, I got turned off by her use of religion when describing ways to escape grooming. Not everyone is religious, and many people are triggered by mentions of religion because of the ways they've been abused (often by people connected to churches and organized religion). I think more people could relate to this book if the author had chosen terms like 'higher power' or faith rather than words like God and Jesus.
I would not recommend this to victims of sexual abuse because I don't think there's enough value in the overall message. Although I tip my hat to the author telling her own personal story, this book would have been much more effective as a fact-based non-fiction take on the process of grooming.
*Free copy provided by Netgalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review*
February 9, 2020
Groomed is an eye-opening story about how our past experiences, interactions, and tragedies have had an effect on who we are. The great thing about this story is that Elizabeth Melendez Fisher gives us examples, questions to ask ourselves to reflect and see how we have been 'Groomed' so that we can take the next steps to heal and letting go of our past.
Elizabeth Melendez Fisher starts the story by opening up and sharing her personal stories of tragedy and sexual abuse. I appreciated her honesty and openness because I know it is not easy to do. She continues to describe how those moments shaped her life and how that led her to be groomed in a way that made her rebel and take care of her body in a different way.
To see how far she has come is beautiful. And I loved that she uses her experience to help others and make us see that our past does not define who we are. It won't happen over night, but by using some of Elizabeth's techniques it can happen.
I think everyone can benefit from this book because we have all been 'Groomed' in some way.
I give Groomed 5 stars. It's tragic yet enlightening story that is beneficial for personal growth and development. Being 'Groomed' doesn't define who we are and Elizabeth Melendez Fisher gives us the tools to embrace our true selves.
Elizabeth Melendez Fisher starts the story by opening up and sharing her personal stories of tragedy and sexual abuse. I appreciated her honesty and openness because I know it is not easy to do. She continues to describe how those moments shaped her life and how that led her to be groomed in a way that made her rebel and take care of her body in a different way.
To see how far she has come is beautiful. And I loved that she uses her experience to help others and make us see that our past does not define who we are. It won't happen over night, but by using some of Elizabeth's techniques it can happen.
I think everyone can benefit from this book because we have all been 'Groomed' in some way.
I give Groomed 5 stars. It's tragic yet enlightening story that is beneficial for personal growth and development. Being 'Groomed' doesn't define who we are and Elizabeth Melendez Fisher gives us the tools to embrace our true selves.
January 25, 2020
What an amazing little gem this turned out to be! I had no idea going into this book what it was really about and I was pleasantly surprised. Elizabeth opens up about past traumas that have threatened to mold her life into one of tragedy. With Counsling, a lot of self reflection, and discovering her worth she was able to move on to become a very successful woman.
How were you groomed growing up? Did your parents push you to excel in school? Maybe they wanted you to be the best athlete on the team and get a college scholarship. Being groomed isn’t a bad thing, all parents want the best for their children. I had an amazing childhood and never felt “groomed” for anything other then my parents wishing me happiness in anything I do. To this day I have had an amazing example of parents who don’t have or need much, but having the biggest generous hearts. I’m proud to say that has rubbed off on me and now my kids as well.
The book is broken down into sections:
Groomed for appearances
Groomed to be invisible
Groomed to endure
Groomed for judgement
Groomed for financial fear
A very important read that will get you thinking, and might even help change your life.
How were you groomed growing up? Did your parents push you to excel in school? Maybe they wanted you to be the best athlete on the team and get a college scholarship. Being groomed isn’t a bad thing, all parents want the best for their children. I had an amazing childhood and never felt “groomed” for anything other then my parents wishing me happiness in anything I do. To this day I have had an amazing example of parents who don’t have or need much, but having the biggest generous hearts. I’m proud to say that has rubbed off on me and now my kids as well.
The book is broken down into sections:
Groomed for appearances
Groomed to be invisible
Groomed to endure
Groomed for judgement
Groomed for financial fear
A very important read that will get you thinking, and might even help change your life.
February 20, 2020
As a sexual abuse survivor when I hear the word “groomed” I often think about it in those terms. Abusers groom their victims. But this book give a different bend to that word.
We can still think of the word in those terms but also in other ways. I was definitely groomed to please people, to look good on the outside no matter the turmoil going on inside of me.
We can be groomed for many different things, such as being invisible, pleasing others, looking good, being a leader, assertive.
I appreciate Elizabeth’s ministry and what she is doing to help women who have been trafficked. I also enjoyed Elizabeth’s openness and honestly in sharing her story, which at times was hard to read.
Have you been groomed? You might be surprised what you discover.
A copy of this book was given to me through Netgalley.com. All opinions are my own.
We can still think of the word in those terms but also in other ways. I was definitely groomed to please people, to look good on the outside no matter the turmoil going on inside of me.
We can be groomed for many different things, such as being invisible, pleasing others, looking good, being a leader, assertive.
I appreciate Elizabeth’s ministry and what she is doing to help women who have been trafficked. I also enjoyed Elizabeth’s openness and honestly in sharing her story, which at times was hard to read.
Have you been groomed? You might be surprised what you discover.
A copy of this book was given to me through Netgalley.com. All opinions are my own.
December 20, 2022
I liked this book for what it offered and the prompts it gave to explore your social conditioning. The last chapter about letting go of anger was especially powerful for me, however I wanted the book to go deeper and I felt like it remained fairly surface level focusing on the author's personal experience and the experiences of people she knew as examples of grooming. I feel like this is a very powerful way to build trust within one-on-one conversations, which no doubt the author is great at in her professional work, but for a book about grooming especially as someone who came in already with a surface level understanding of social conditioning and pressures from childhood it fell a little short.
March 6, 2020
I downloaded this audio from Libro.fm as a free ALC. Librarians, learn more at: https://libro.fm/alc-program
I was very interested in this topic and looking forward to listening to the book. It is narrated by the author, and in most cases that is a bad idea. That is true this time, also unfortunately. Though she reads with great enthusiasm, she has a lisp. As a fellow lisper, I am not without sympathy for this problem. I couldn't get too far with the book. It is very jarring. My review reflects the audio quality. I can not review for the content of the book.
I was very interested in this topic and looking forward to listening to the book. It is narrated by the author, and in most cases that is a bad idea. That is true this time, also unfortunately. Though she reads with great enthusiasm, she has a lisp. As a fellow lisper, I am not without sympathy for this problem. I couldn't get too far with the book. It is very jarring. My review reflects the audio quality. I can not review for the content of the book.
January 18, 2020
This book really hit home for me and I didn't expect it to be such a gut punch. The first chapter asks you about a secret you keep and how that has affected your entire life. The author shares deeply personally secrets of her past and gives you an in-depth look at how that changed the trajectory of her life. This book gave me so much to think about that I'm still processing it long after the last page. Highly recommend this one.
May 20, 2021
This book was recommended to me after I read Being Lolita, a story about being groomed which I very much enjoyed. I think I was expecting something similar with this book, but it is very different. This is more of a self help book--which is fine, if that's the kind of thing you like and were expecting to read. That's not what I was expecting. I really didn't care much for this book, but I can see why others enjoyed it.
July 16, 2022
A very interesting read that gave me a new perspective on how things in my past effect the present. Even taking in things from a "normal" upbringing into consideration.
Little in guidance on how to practically change things but jumpstarts thought-processes and is a great one to reflect from.
I would most likely have appreciated it even more if it had not been so centered around a religious look on the world.
Little in guidance on how to practically change things but jumpstarts thought-processes and is a great one to reflect from.
I would most likely have appreciated it even more if it had not been so centered around a religious look on the world.
October 30, 2022
Wow! I learned so much!
No way you can read this book just once. With the story format and the breakdown of specific grooming types, I just couldn’t stop reading. Elizabeth informs in a way that brings confidence to the reader, with no shame. She allows us to heal and learn. My personal experience with trauma lead me to coaching. This book is healing and a tool for my tool for my resources. This should be essential reading for any trauma informed professional.
No way you can read this book just once. With the story format and the breakdown of specific grooming types, I just couldn’t stop reading. Elizabeth informs in a way that brings confidence to the reader, with no shame. She allows us to heal and learn. My personal experience with trauma lead me to coaching. This book is healing and a tool for my tool for my resources. This should be essential reading for any trauma informed professional.
May 18, 2025
Loved the first 2/3 of this book. Really majestic you think what we as women have heard throughout our lives. I found a few that really hit me. Unfortunately the last 1/3 is a bit of self promotion about the author and the foundation. This was ok , but way too long after reading a powerful book
December 16, 2022
WOW! This book was great. It really helps to digest and move through the things of our past. Not really a religious book but has some Christian principles.
January 5, 2025
I was hoping this would be more about Selah Freedom, the anti-sex trafficking organization the author runs, but it was mainly a self-help book. Good book, but not what I was looking for.
August 19, 2025
This book is really great for women who have been abused and are living life wondering why there keeps being patterns that keep repeating itself. Recommend breaking the cycle by reading this book.
January 19, 2020
Groomed is an enlightening and powerful book that shows you just how condemning words can be to the psyche. While many of us have just one definition of “groomed”, Elizabeth suggests that being groomed is, unfortunately, more universal than we would like to believe.
Due to her personal and professional experiences, Elizabeth has become somewhat of an expert on recognizing manipulation. In Groomed, Elizabeth educates us on the different ways we can be groomed.
Groomed is sooo real. The honesty in this book helps you become more honest with yourself.
Read the full review in my blog: https://tabithoughts.com/2020/01/13/b...
Due to her personal and professional experiences, Elizabeth has become somewhat of an expert on recognizing manipulation. In Groomed, Elizabeth educates us on the different ways we can be groomed.
Groomed is sooo real. The honesty in this book helps you become more honest with yourself.
Read the full review in my blog: https://tabithoughts.com/2020/01/13/b...
February 14, 2020
I very rarely read self-help books and likely would never have picked this book up if it had not been sent to me. I thought it was about the author’s organization that rescues victims of sex trafficking, and that is discussed in the book, but it is also a discussion of all the various ways people may be groomed into who they are and how they see themselves. This book attempts to universalize the concept of being groomed and it addresses ways you may have been groomed in your past – for appearances, to be invisible, for judgement, to endure, and for financial fear. While it is true that most of us can pinpoint times we were hurt in our childhoods, whether by adults close to us or bullies at school or otherwise, I thankfully did not find that I identified with any of the types of grooming that the author describes. It is certainly worth thinking about the behaviors that you or the women you know may display and helpful to understand what they may have gone through in their pasts that make them who they are today.
The book offers opportunity for reflection and ways to move forwards from the hurts of the past. It includes religious pieces and the concept of Selah, which means to pause, and is the name of Fisher’s organization. Selah Freedom is an organization that raises awareness and aims to end sex trafficking and bring freedom to the exploited. You can find more information and resources on their website.
While I wouldn’t say this book was necessarily meant for someone like me, it may be an important resource for someone who has been struggling.
The book offers opportunity for reflection and ways to move forwards from the hurts of the past. It includes religious pieces and the concept of Selah, which means to pause, and is the name of Fisher’s organization. Selah Freedom is an organization that raises awareness and aims to end sex trafficking and bring freedom to the exploited. You can find more information and resources on their website.
While I wouldn’t say this book was necessarily meant for someone like me, it may be an important resource for someone who has been struggling.
June 7, 2024
I dnf’d after the book started going on about catholicism and being catholic. It wasn’t for me but the book also had some good messages
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