終於，可以好好說再見：當我們失去最愛的人，該如何走出悲傷？

by Jeff Brazier, 謝佳真 (Translator)

一本「沒有人想要、卻每個人都需要」的書！

　　生命是一場緩慢的旅行，
　　當終於來到最後的終點，
　　我願意給你最溫柔的告別……

　　人的一生中總有經歷悲傷的時刻，不是在此時，就是在彼時。

　　你或許失去了父母、伴侶、手足、朋友等生命中重要的人，卻沒有機會說再見，或是覺得自己當初應該多盡一點心力。生離死別的場景千變萬化，每個人的悲傷都是獨一無二的，每個人的哀悼方式也不會跟別人相同，除了你自己，沒有人可以決定你要如何調適自己的心境。

　　你會允許自己哭泣嗎？你會不斷譴責自己、充滿愧疚嗎？你會隱藏自己的情緒來保護孩子嗎？你會裝作一副沒事的樣子嗎？

　　無論你會如何消化這些感受，你只需要知道：你並不孤單。

　　本書作者傑夫‧布雷澤是知名的人生教練，並且是喪親兒童輔導機構「邂逅悲傷」的親善大使，也曾經歷喪妻之痛的他要告訴你：悲傷是最厲害的捉迷藏高手，不管你花多少時間把自己藏起來，它總有辦法找到你。你可以放任你的哀慟變成無時無刻折磨你的巨大痛苦，你也可以選擇讓悲傷不再那麼椎心蝕骨，終至減輕到你可以應付的程度。

　　如何走出悲傷雖然沒有「一體適用」的解決方法，但你可以在本書中找到許多實用的建議，幫助你一起面對這段黑暗、孤獨、絕望的旅程。而只有學會對自己仁慈，才能真正理解悲傷，撫慰自己，好好地活下去。

Genres: Nonfiction

Paperback

Published November 26, 2018

Reviews

[Brindy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having heard Jeff speak on TV about this book a few weeks before it was published and liking the way he spoke about dealing with grief, I decided buy a copy. This book is full of common sense advice that we all struggle to realise that we already know when dealing with loss. It is written in chapters that deal with different circumstances of loss and each chapter can be read independently depending on your situation. It is an easy read on a difficult subject with personal insights in helping children deal with the loss and the potential loss of a parent, how family dynamics can change after the loss of a key family member and so much more. Take a look at the chapter headings and you will find something that you can relate to. As someone who struggles to know what to say when faced with someone recently bereaved I found the chapter on Words that Might Upset Someone in Mourning a real eye-opener in how certain commonly used phrases which are meant to help the bereaved can have the opposite effect and some useful suggestions on what works better. A very useful guide on different aspects of grief.

[Charlotte Falkner · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think this book needs a better title, honestly. It isn't just about grief but mostly like how to deal with a terminal illness of your own, things like whether you should choose burial or cremation. The title and subtitle do not indicate what this book is, at all.

[Jack Horton · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great book that i found very relatable following the death of my father. Some chapters i read from the perspective of my father, other chapters in the perspective of my mother - but what i read from my perspective i found reassuring and relatable. Thanks Jeff.

[Kiu Law · Rating 3 out of 5]

這本書比較合適有小孩子的人
只有伴侶的人看著看著大多頁數都不管用。

[Melissa Kravetz · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book for a school assignment on grief. I, personally, did not find it useful for that purpose. However, for those experiencing grief this book would be an excellent resource as it is filled with stories of people experiencing grief of all kinds and the writer writes with sincere compassion for the readers.

[egoo · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jeff is such a likeable author and known personality. His writing is authentic and speaks from experience. He is humble and honest in what he says, not claiming to have all the answers, but sharing the wisdom he has gleaned from his personal and professional life.
This book is like a manual for what to do next after death. There's some frank straightforward practical stuff, and plenty of guidance for how to respond emotionally, and how to support others. Genuine ideas for moving forward in a healthy way.
The underlying message is to talk and share feelings, not suppressing them, which may not be new information but he relays it in practical examples that the reader can relate to.
I particularly like the contents and chapter titles which mean it doesn't have to be read cover to cover. A reluctant reader might just be pointed in the direction of certain relevant chapters. I would recommend this book to anyone who doesn't know how to navigate caring for themselves and those around them after a death.