Handbook on Thriving as an Adoptive Family: Real-Life Solutions to Common Challenges

by David Sanford (Editor)

Adoption is a high calling from God, and the Christian home primary soil for planting seeds of faith. But how will post-adoption challenges affect this growth? Most agencies do a great job of connecting families with children who need a forever family. Not many prepare you for the unexpected issues―an adopted child fighting with his new siblings or not wanting to be touched or showing signs of reactive attachment disorder (RAD). The more you know, the more confident you will be to meet the unique needs of your adopted child and your entire family. This distinctly Christian book will equip readers to be successful adoptive parents. Packed from cover to cover with information, advice, ideas, and resources, Handbook on Thriving as an Adoptive Family will inspire and inform parents committed to making adoption work. Handbook on Thriving as an Adoptive Family is the one parenting resource that provides comprehensive, topical, Bible-based solutions for the inevitable challenges after adoption.

Genres: Adoption, Parenting, Nonfiction, Family

288 pages, Paperback

First published November 1, 2008

Reviews

[Tawny · Rating 4 out of 5]

I highly recommend this one for any adoptive parents! I really appreciate how it incorporated scriptures and true-life stories in each chapter. Favorite/most helpful lines:
"All parenting is a brave journey of faith" (2).
"We cannot change a child's past, but we can cooperate with the Holy Spirit and help to affect the years to come with God's grace and guidance" (11).
"Adoption is nothing fancy. We complicate it with paperwork, but it boils down to this: A child has no family; a family opens its arms" (17).
"Many adopted children have their radar constantly scanning for messages that tell them that they are worth less than everyone else" (43).
"One-third of all Americans are touched by adoption within their immediate families" (62).
"Our society has this love thing all twisted around. We think the basis of love is our feelings, but it's not. The New Testament teaches that love is a decision to act. Love is always about what you do for others, not what you feel" (91).
"Adoption is designed by God for children to have opportunities they might not otherwise have had without your love" (97).
"The greatest challenge for all of us is not in loving a child, but to see a child (or adult) through God's eyes" (239).

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

“At once, it’s been both exhausting & exhilarating. It’s been joyous & heartbreaking. You’ve given everything you’ve had to give, yet your cup is now overflowing with much more than you ever knew you had to offer. And it’s only just begun. It’s critical important to consider the adoption journey much like the many miles of a mountain marathon. The. Journey is long. It’ll take your breath away. It can be unpredictable or maybe even frustrating and fascinating all at the same time.”

This book was so good! Especially the first half, I highlighted so much! I would recommend this to anyone thinking of adopting, in the process, or who has adopted children in their family.

[D Wesley · Rating 5 out of 5]

A highly practical handbook for adoptive parents! Each chapter is written by a different author on a different topic related to adoption, covering different phases of life for the adopted child and different aspects of adoption. This book is written for adoptive parents with the goal of helping them meet the challenges of adoption in a prepared and positive way. It's written from a Christian perspective with Christian parents in mind, but it would be relevant for secular parents as well. It's not a theological treatise on adoption.

[Bonnie Krueger · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book for my church. I thought it was very comprehensive and very personal. My only complaint is some of the medical sections seemed a bit out of date. The book could use a little updating since it has not been published since 2006

[Kimberly Patton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very good handbook with a lot of detail, as well as personal stories about fostering and adoption. Very informative and covered a wide range of important topics.

[Krista Ehlers · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was suggested to me as the "greatest book ever on adoption." I will agree that it is an excellent handbook to the adoption experience. In some ways, it was like a slimmed down, summary version of Deborah Gray's "Attaching in Adoption," and if you have been putting off reading that longer book, you can get a lot of good information from this one. Each chapter of this book is contributed by a different adoption professional, and these folks are often (always?) adoptive parents themselves. In addition, the book is sprinkled with testimonies from adoptive families. One aspect of this book that I appreciated is the integration of a spiritual/faith component. Many adoption books today are written from a purely secular perspective, and while they are still valuable, I personally appreciate that extra perspective. The book is divided into four sections. The first focuses on the issues related to becoming an adoptive family - homecoming, attachment, sibling relationships, getting support, and nurture/discipline. Some of these topics are not covered or not covered thoroughly in other books. The next section covers four developmental stages - similar, although less in-depth the the Deborah Gray book. Finally, the third section covers unique issues, such as ethnic identity, abuse, or drug/alcohol affected children.

[Aubrey · Rating 2 out of 5]

At times this book was disjointed in flow between subjects and was not comprehensive. However, some sections were helpful (in particular the discussion on discipline), and I enjoyed reading the stories of those who had experienced adoption from all points of the triad. Perhaps I felt it wasn't comprehensive because much of it didn't relate to our situation. It is really a book for those adopting infants/toddlers internationally. Although it did include some about U.S. public adoptions, those still dealt mostly with infant/toddler adoptions. I did like that it had a Christian perspective, but sometimes it seemed to be an afterthought (coming at the very end of each section) more than a central theme. My guess is that was an attempt by the authors or editors to make the book more "accessible" to unchurched/non-religious adoptive parents. However, cramming it into the end instead of thoughtfully lacing it throughout made it seem insincere way that I believe would turn off that population.

[Jenifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is definitely an easy-to-read resource for those who have adopted or are considering adoption; however, it isn't as thorough as I would have liked. The authors give many recommendations for other, more in-depth resources that I'll probably have to check out to delve deeper into certain adoption issues that we are likely to face. What I enjoyed most were the personal stories from parents scattered throughout the book. The stories come from those who have dealt firsthand with challenges that adoptive families face. This is a very practical book, but just doesn't cover enough of the spiritual aspect of adoption. I probably won't re-read this book, but I will use the online resources suggested as well as the Resources Guide found at the end.

[Kendra · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of stories with creative ideas and solutions for handling tough parenting situations. I found though, like many adoption books out there, it seemed to be geared more towards international adoptions.

[Erika Gillette · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some helpful pieces, but a lot of it seemed like "fluff" to me. I understand it is a Christian book, but to be constantly repeating to trust in God and make sure to pray seemed redundant to me. I appreciate books with more active steps to take.

[Barbara · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very wise and insightful book filled with wisdom about the unique issues facing adopted children and their families.

[Ami · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good overview of adoption issues for families considering adoption.

[Kara · Rating 4 out of 5]

Realistic, but positive. Reassuring and encouraging.

[Rachel Schaaf · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good info, this will stay in my library for reference