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Fight Like a Girl: Writing Fight Scenes for Female Characters
Women are not men with mammaries. They don't approach, handle, or react to violence in the same way.
Aiki Flinthart is a long-time martial artist, archer, knife-thrower, assault-survivor, and author of 11+ novels - all with kick-ass heroines and heroes.
In Fight Like a Girl, she brings her own experience, plus the results of extensive research and interviews, to the table for fellow authors.
You should come away with an excellent understanding of the differences between males and females, how they fight, react, and think. What weapons and techniques work well for smaller physiques. How it feels to be involved in a fight.
You'll also get a deep understanding of how to apply that knowledge to an actual fight scene. A step by step guide to how to write and pace your fight scene, word choices, foreshadowing, character arcs, and how to pack an emotional punch.
Make sure your readers devour your fight scenes. Pick up a copy of Fight Like a Girl.
Aiki Flinthart is a long-time martial artist, archer, knife-thrower, assault-survivor, and author of 11+ novels - all with kick-ass heroines and heroes.
In Fight Like a Girl, she brings her own experience, plus the results of extensive research and interviews, to the table for fellow authors.
You should come away with an excellent understanding of the differences between males and females, how they fight, react, and think. What weapons and techniques work well for smaller physiques. How it feels to be involved in a fight.
You'll also get a deep understanding of how to apply that knowledge to an actual fight scene. A step by step guide to how to write and pace your fight scene, word choices, foreshadowing, character arcs, and how to pack an emotional punch.
Make sure your readers devour your fight scenes. Pick up a copy of Fight Like a Girl.
236 pages, Paperback
Published October 5, 2019
70 people are currently reading
168 people want to read
About the author
Aiki Flinthart
43 books69 followersAiki lives in Brisbane, Australia, with her husband, (Ernest), teenage son (Leonidis - not their real names, obviously), aging dog and directionally-challenged fish.
In between being a wife, running a business full-time and helping Leonidis with homework, she squeezes in a few hobbies, including:
Martial arts, painting, writing, reading, bellydancing and playing three or four musical instruments. Occasionally she even sleeps. Very occasionally.
In between being a wife, running a business full-time and helping Leonidis with homework, she squeezes in a few hobbies, including:
Martial arts, painting, writing, reading, bellydancing and playing three or four musical instruments. Occasionally she even sleeps. Very occasionally.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 31 reviews
October 31, 2019
Despite the title, this book covers how both men and women react to violence. It does deal with generalisation and doesn't cover non-binary characters (the author explains she was unable to find sufficient research), but the book provides enough details for a writer to work out how their characters should behave based on their background and training. Speaking of training, the book covers the differences between how a trained and untrained person may react in a situation.
Overall, I found it an interesting read and will probably refer to it when I write.
Overall, I found it an interesting read and will probably refer to it when I write.
October 10, 2021
This was a very helpful guide to writing fight scenes - not just from a female perspective. The different sections, especially on body chemistry and perception, were quite interesting and gave me some new ideas. While the book could have been slightly more detailed on some topics, I appreciated that it kept it overall short.
October 23, 2019
A book solely for improving your writing on fight scenes specifically with women characters is seriously niche, but this book has a lot of information that would be helpful for writing fight scenes in general regardless of character sex, training level, or time period (ie. sci fi, fantasy or modern crime fight scenes are all given a look-in).
This book was lent to me by one of my friends in my critique group after I'd submitted a combat heavy short story for critique. Hilariously enough Flinthart herself was at that meeting scoping out our group with a friend to see if they wanted to join ;p What were the odds! My friend swears she didn't know Flinthart would be there.
A lot is covered in the book. Information like how our body's chemical reactions to a fight or assault differ between male and female, how social conditioning can affect the different sexes, various fighting styles and weapons (including their ranges), as well as much information on how a trained person's actions and reactions would differ from an untrained. All of this interjected with real life stories both from the author herself and people she has interviewed. While i was reading this book in paper form I also read 'Facing Violence' in audiobook form and the two make wonderful companions if you're looking to craft better fight scenes.
Once your head (and notebook ;p ) is full of all this fabulous information Flinthart proceeds to show you how to wrangle it all together into an actual fight scene, including pro tips on pacing and word choice as well as questions and suggestions for each stage of the fight scene, including aftermath. The book concludes with some critiques of fight scenes as an example of how to put it all together.
An extremely useful and informative book for any writer who will have combat in their books, even if the characters aren't female.
This book was lent to me by one of my friends in my critique group after I'd submitted a combat heavy short story for critique. Hilariously enough Flinthart herself was at that meeting scoping out our group with a friend to see if they wanted to join ;p What were the odds! My friend swears she didn't know Flinthart would be there.
A lot is covered in the book. Information like how our body's chemical reactions to a fight or assault differ between male and female, how social conditioning can affect the different sexes, various fighting styles and weapons (including their ranges), as well as much information on how a trained person's actions and reactions would differ from an untrained. All of this interjected with real life stories both from the author herself and people she has interviewed. While i was reading this book in paper form I also read 'Facing Violence' in audiobook form and the two make wonderful companions if you're looking to craft better fight scenes.
Once your head (and notebook ;p ) is full of all this fabulous information Flinthart proceeds to show you how to wrangle it all together into an actual fight scene, including pro tips on pacing and word choice as well as questions and suggestions for each stage of the fight scene, including aftermath. The book concludes with some critiques of fight scenes as an example of how to put it all together.
An extremely useful and informative book for any writer who will have combat in their books, even if the characters aren't female.
October 31, 2019
Aiki is an author of a number of fantasy series with kick-ass heroines. She is also an experienced martial artist who is also trained in a range of weaponry including bow and arrow, swords, knives, darts and so forth. She can frequently be found at writing conventions with a hair sword stashed in her bun, so unless you like being cut, or like the feel of the floor on your back, don’t sneak up on her from behind. She’s the real deal, so just say hi the normal way.
Having established her credibility, let’s talk about the book. It’s well written, with practical examples in an easy to follow style. It has convenient sub-heading, for quick reference and it also has exercises you can do by yourself or even in groups. More importantly, Aiki explains the difference between how men and women think and react, which I wish had been explained to me years ago, it would have saved me a lot of confusion.
As someone who has trained in aikido, I found myself readily agreeing with Aiki’s comments and also where she’s critiqued book scenes and found fault with the credibility of the attack/defence used. But Aiki also takes it a step further and shows how and why to choose words, how to pace and when to add in emotion.
I found the book incredibly invaluable and looking back on old work, I can now see how I could have made female fight scenes more credible. I’ll be rereading sections before writing a female fight scene as a refresher. Since all books have conflict, even if your work in progress doesn’t have a female fight scene, this book will still help you make the conflict more realistic. It’s a book suitable for all ages.
Having established her credibility, let’s talk about the book. It’s well written, with practical examples in an easy to follow style. It has convenient sub-heading, for quick reference and it also has exercises you can do by yourself or even in groups. More importantly, Aiki explains the difference between how men and women think and react, which I wish had been explained to me years ago, it would have saved me a lot of confusion.
As someone who has trained in aikido, I found myself readily agreeing with Aiki’s comments and also where she’s critiqued book scenes and found fault with the credibility of the attack/defence used. But Aiki also takes it a step further and shows how and why to choose words, how to pace and when to add in emotion.
I found the book incredibly invaluable and looking back on old work, I can now see how I could have made female fight scenes more credible. I’ll be rereading sections before writing a female fight scene as a refresher. Since all books have conflict, even if your work in progress doesn’t have a female fight scene, this book will still help you make the conflict more realistic. It’s a book suitable for all ages.
February 22, 2020
This is an excellent writing resource that I would strongly encourage for all writers using fight/action sequences in their work. It's helpful not just for writing female fight scenes (both those with training or otherwise) but also in identifying the physiological and psychological differences between males and females in combat, so the book has a much wider scope and application than one would expect. The first half primarily deals with about fights in real life, what occurs in the body and mind of willing/unwilling combatants; the second half then focuses on how best to apply these details to a work of fiction, with as much realism and credibility as possible.
Flinthart has put an enormous amount of work and research into this, and her martial arts expertise really shows, as does her experience as an author. This is a must have resource.
Flinthart has put an enormous amount of work and research into this, and her martial arts expertise really shows, as does her experience as an author. This is a must have resource.
September 6, 2020
This is a gem of a book written with personal experience and research. The chapters on the shift from untrained to trained were extraordinarily helpful in mapping out my MC's journey. The chapters helped with the plot (in knowing what my MC was capable of and where she would fail miserably), and provided insights into her emotional arc and internal growth. I would recommend this book to any writer, particularly to those who write fantasy, but don't have a clue on how to structure fight scenes for their female protagonist.
January 13, 2022
Brilliant!
I’ve read a lot of fiction with unbelievable fight scenes that when I heard about this book on a podcast I just knew I had to read it.
I like how the author describes everything a woman would go through during different types of fights, what different types of women would do, how trained vs non-trained would react, professional vs “normal”, etc. would go. There’s so much to think about that, if you’ve never been in a real-life fight, wold escape you when you write it.
Reading the fight scenes and then how she fixed them was so much fun. I could see where what she had taught earlier in the book came into practice.
My only issue is a formatting one: the Epub didn’t have a proper table of contents and sections to easily navigate to sections from anywhere in the book. also, not all text shows up in nightmode (especially headings).
A must-have for any author who wants to have any type of fight-scene in their books.
I’ve read a lot of fiction with unbelievable fight scenes that when I heard about this book on a podcast I just knew I had to read it.
I like how the author describes everything a woman would go through during different types of fights, what different types of women would do, how trained vs non-trained would react, professional vs “normal”, etc. would go. There’s so much to think about that, if you’ve never been in a real-life fight, wold escape you when you write it.
Reading the fight scenes and then how she fixed them was so much fun. I could see where what she had taught earlier in the book came into practice.
My only issue is a formatting one: the Epub didn’t have a proper table of contents and sections to easily navigate to sections from anywhere in the book. also, not all text shows up in nightmode (especially headings).
A must-have for any author who wants to have any type of fight-scene in their books.
February 24, 2020
Useful overview of women's physical and psychological approaches to fighting. I particularly found the sections on the differing "fight or flight" responses in men and women helpful. Lots of good info for writing fight scenes.
November 22, 2020
I picked up a copy of Fight Like a Girl by Aiki Flinthart after reading a recommendation from another author. And wow—just wow. So, besides writing books, this woman is skilled in martial arts and knife throwing. Knife. Throwing. I mean, who does that? Well, Aiki Flinthart, apparently.
The author’s style is informed and laced with humor. I found the book to be well researched and diverse in its approach to writing female characters in life-threatening situations. Chapters include insights from the perspectives of biology, psychology, emotion—and grammar.
The author provides concrete examples of how to write—and not write—females engaging in combat with males, who are typically larger and stronger. As a bonus, she dissects poorly written scenes where the description of the fight is illogical. And she provides solutions.
I love this book and plan to refer to it often. And I recommend it to any author writing action thrillers that feature strong female characters. Oh, and at some point, I might even look into knife throwing. It sounds like fun.
February 10, 2025
Flinthart’s craft book is an easy read and a must-have when beginning to write “fight” scenes. This book is not only advice on pacing and syntax, but also a guidebook for physiology and psychology. Flinthart discusses emotional responses and biochemical responses. She analyzes the typical behaviors of untrained and trained fighters of both men and women. She incorporates interviews with law enforcement agents, military personnel, and martial artists. At the end, she takes the reader step by step through three fight scenes to highlight and emphasize points discussed previously. “Fight Like a Girl” is one of my personal favorites in my craft book collection.
June 8, 2025
The JLM Writing Books Book Club (https://storycoach.judylmohr.com/book...) reviewed this book in June 2025. We are recommending this book as a good resource for anyone who is interested in writing physical fight scenes. It doesn't matter if your characters are male or female. All types of characters are discussed, ranging from the inexperienced through to the professional. There is even a discussion about how military personnel are different to law enforcement.
We recommend that you read the book from start to finish at least once, so you can get a feel for what the book covers. Then you can dive in and out based on the characters you are writing.
We recommend that you read the book from start to finish at least once, so you can get a feel for what the book covers. Then you can dive in and out based on the characters you are writing.
November 18, 2021
Really useful and a wonderful resource for anyone writing fight scenes, not just those that identify as women. Highlights lots of things a writer might not necessarily have thought of. Well-written and I loved that it was so straight to the point and succinct without too much filler or history. Really good guide and very interesting too.
June 5, 2023
great info
The first half of this book is incredibly valuable advice about the physical reality of combat. The second half is more “writing advice.” Really enjoyed, and I’ll be coming back to this for research purposes often in the future.
The first half of this book is incredibly valuable advice about the physical reality of combat. The second half is more “writing advice.” Really enjoyed, and I’ll be coming back to this for research purposes often in the future.
May 27, 2020
The ultimate resource for writing fight scenes!
September 12, 2021
insightful
Definitely more than fighting like a girl! Loved the breakdown of biology and comparison to male characters. Very informative book.
Definitely more than fighting like a girl! Loved the breakdown of biology and comparison to male characters. Very informative book.
November 4, 2023
Really good (helpful) factual information, I just wasn’t sure about the way it was presented/the writing part.
November 23, 2019
Brilliant resource for any author writing fight scenes (actual physical combat/assault or verbal arguments). Covers not just female physiology, biochemistry and social conditioning, but also male, so is equally as useful for fighting like a male - though, yes, more focus on female since male combat/anger responses are the default we receive through all media. (Even though so much media is still getting it wrong.) Also goes into great detail for the actions/responses of both trained and untrained fighters of any gender/sex.
Loved the progression of the sections. Begins with research/facts, before moving into how to realistically arm your female character to win (in terms of skills, weapons, things to avoid), before then moving this into the context of creating a scene and writing your fight. Helpful tips on breaking down the sections of a scene/fight and the best pacing, word choice, etc for each of them. Finishes up by critiquing some fight scenes from other authors, explaining any issues in them and giving an example rewrite.
I meant to read this slowly over the course of a few days, but found I couldn't put it down. Also had to go run for tiny sticky notes to place-mark sections to come back to later.
An absolutely essential new part of my writing kit.
Rating: 5 stars. Could not be more perfect unless it wrote my fight scenes for me.
Loved the progression of the sections. Begins with research/facts, before moving into how to realistically arm your female character to win (in terms of skills, weapons, things to avoid), before then moving this into the context of creating a scene and writing your fight. Helpful tips on breaking down the sections of a scene/fight and the best pacing, word choice, etc for each of them. Finishes up by critiquing some fight scenes from other authors, explaining any issues in them and giving an example rewrite.
I meant to read this slowly over the course of a few days, but found I couldn't put it down. Also had to go run for tiny sticky notes to place-mark sections to come back to later.
An absolutely essential new part of my writing kit.
Rating: 5 stars. Could not be more perfect unless it wrote my fight scenes for me.
October 22, 2019
A fascinating, informative, and enlightening read.
Flinthart doesn’t just teach you how to write kicking and punching. She shows you how men and women react before, during, and after a fight; explaining social, cultural, and biochemical reasons for the differences. Flinthart tells you what a fight feels like, smells like, sounds like, and covers everything from an argument, to an assault, to a bare-handed fight, to use of weapons. Both trained and untrained fighters are explored, including the differences in how trained and untrained people will view a situation, react in a fight, and what they will remember afterwards. Then she pulls it all together to show you how to write that all-important fight scene, and make it meaningful.
Flinthart’s easy to read and engaging style is peppered with real-world examples and vignettes from industry professionals, and a good dose of razor-sharp humour. Any writer who’s ever had a character throw a punch should read this book.
I, personally, look forward to going back over my fight scenes and getting myself a yellow belt in writing.
Flinthart doesn’t just teach you how to write kicking and punching. She shows you how men and women react before, during, and after a fight; explaining social, cultural, and biochemical reasons for the differences. Flinthart tells you what a fight feels like, smells like, sounds like, and covers everything from an argument, to an assault, to a bare-handed fight, to use of weapons. Both trained and untrained fighters are explored, including the differences in how trained and untrained people will view a situation, react in a fight, and what they will remember afterwards. Then she pulls it all together to show you how to write that all-important fight scene, and make it meaningful.
Flinthart’s easy to read and engaging style is peppered with real-world examples and vignettes from industry professionals, and a good dose of razor-sharp humour. Any writer who’s ever had a character throw a punch should read this book.
I, personally, look forward to going back over my fight scenes and getting myself a yellow belt in writing.
April 25, 2021
Fight Like a Girl by Aiki Flinthart is a practical guide on how to write fight scenes for women, drawing from her own expertise in martial arts, bow and sword and as a writer. She makes some pertinent points about the physical and emotional differences; the advantages and disadvantages women face and some good points on how to put this one paper. I found some parts of the book more helpful than others, but definitely recommended. I've enjoyed immensely her Blackbird Sings and her short story in the Like a Woman anthology which was short-listed for the Aurealis prize. A bright star gone too soon.
January 5, 2020
A wonderful and highly informative reference book. Not only does it help inform how to write fight scenes for female characters but it also provides information for writing fight scenes in general. As I've read through it I found myself pulling out my post-it tabs and marking the pages I felt I would most likely want to look back over whilst writing, as I often do with my favourite reference books. I'd highly recommend this book as a staple on your bookshelf if you're a writer (even if you don't necessarily intend on writing fight scenes).
April 12, 2022
This book was just what I needed as a new writer working on my first novel. Fight scenes are HARD, but they're essential to the action sci-fi I'm working on and my previous fight knowledge is mostly stuff I picked up from watching Marvel action movies, haha.
Now I can add a few more realistic actions and reactions and write scenes that sound more believable. It's also good to know the hormonal and body chemistry differences that women experience when fighting in comparison to men, and the likely emotional response that kicks in after the fight.
Great stuff.
Now I can add a few more realistic actions and reactions and write scenes that sound more believable. It's also good to know the hormonal and body chemistry differences that women experience when fighting in comparison to men, and the likely emotional response that kicks in after the fight.
Great stuff.
May 5, 2021
This is one of my all-time must have, desert Island, comes with me to the Apocalypse and wherever else, books.
Being a writer, a martial arts and weapons enthusiast, and a supporter of Aiki’s work (including her final compilation and her creation of a memorial foundation for emerging writers), I keep this book close for reason both practical and sentimental.
The woman knew her stuff. And, irrespective of the mightiness-factor of either pen or sword, Aiki had command of both.
Being a writer, a martial arts and weapons enthusiast, and a supporter of Aiki’s work (including her final compilation and her creation of a memorial foundation for emerging writers), I keep this book close for reason both practical and sentimental.
The woman knew her stuff. And, irrespective of the mightiness-factor of either pen or sword, Aiki had command of both.
October 15, 2019
This book is an excellent resource for all writers of fiction (maybe non-fiction too), with insights into the different ways women react to attack, how they defend themselves, and how they fight back. With useful exercises and easy to follow narrative, I highly recommend this to male and female (and everyone inbetween) writers of any age and experience.
December 28, 2019
Possibly the best writing advice book I've ever read. Specific and to the point with plenty of examples. Heaps of useful information, not only about fighting, but about human psychology and gender and explanations on how to use this in a custom way to suit your characters. Great advice for writing fight scenes with characters of all genders!
October 21, 2020
Wow, just what I needed when I needed it. Aiki's book Fight like a Girl is brilliant and a must for all authors, filmmakers, directors to get the way a female thinks and fights right. It's not all about females. My MG 5th century girl with pony survival adventure will have age appropriate, realistic skirmishes and attacks, thanks to Aiki's book Thank you.
August 19, 2021
Really easy to read and full of great ideas for writing female characters involved in fighting and intense action that gets the adrenaline pumping.
There's a solid bit about how the physiology differs, based on the author's experience as much as the science. This is then built on with examples where the differences between men and women are shown well in popular media.
There's a solid bit about how the physiology differs, based on the author's experience as much as the science. This is then built on with examples where the differences between men and women are shown well in popular media.
April 8, 2020
I bought this book hoping to learn how to improve the action/fight scenes in my writing, and boy oh boy did Aiki deliver. I can’t tell you how much I loved this book. There’s so much fantastic information and practical ways to help me improve my own fight scenes. Sooooooo Gooooooood! 🤩
February 19, 2020
An excellent resource for writers looking to understand the nuances and realities of fight scenes!
May 20, 2020
A must read for writers of fiction with any level of fight scene or physical struggle. Flinthart is a master guide and storyteller.
September 22, 2020
Really useful for anyone writing fight scenes, for both male and female characters. Aiki clearly knows her stuff.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 31 reviews