Don't Be That Girl: A Guide to Finding the Confident, Rational Girl Within

by Travis Stork

Don't worry. This is not that book.

Travis Stork, the handsome and charismatic star of The Paris , has chalked up more dating experience than most men could claim in a lifetime. As an ER doctor, he's also an expert on the psychological and physiological factors involved in mental and emotional well-being. In Don't Be That Girl , he combines his personal experience and professional expertise to help you demystify the self-defeating behaviors that characterize that girl -- behaviors that unfortunately, even if unintentionally, prevent many women from getting the most from their lives and relationships.

Don't Be That Girl cuts to the heart of what makes a woman cross into that girl territory and the red flags that tip guys off to the possibility that, yikes, they may be dating that girl. So who is that girl, exactly? She defies a simple definition. She may be the chameleon who turns into a completely different person the second a guy walks into the room. She could be the girl with the ironclad agenda that she's held to dearly since her first encounter with Modern Bride (and she'll do anything to make sure her plan materializes). Or she's the consummate "yes" girl who is always going along with his every wish. If she's not saying yes, she might very well be a drama queen who is always saying no because she can't seem to live without conflict. Then again, she might not be dramatic at all, just miserable inside, wearing her anger and bitterness as a badge of honor. In short, she's the girl who's trying fruitlessly to be someone she's not -- who's falling victim to the common pitfalls and patterns that lead to that girl behavior -- rather than believing in herself, following her passions, and maintaining healthy priorities.

But Don't Be That Girl isn't all cautionary tales and bad news. Often, the same traits that make a woman that girl are the traits that, at their core, are her biggest strengths -- if she only knew how to refocus them. By drawing attention to and celebrating these positive attributes, Dr. Stork reveals how to cultivate and take advantage of them in ways that will lead you to the confidence and happiness that you deserve. Whether you are in a relationship, hopelessly searching, or somewhere in between, this book will arm you with practical insights so you will never again have to ask yourself, Is it me or is it him?

Genres: Self Help

192 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2008

About the author

Dr. Travis Stork is an Emmy(R)-nominated co-host of the award-winning talk show "The Doctors" and a practicing board-certified emergency medicine physician. He graduated magna cum laude from Duke University and earned his M.D. with honors from the University of Virginia, where he was elected into the prestigious honor society of Alpha Omega Alpha for outstanding academic achievement. Born and raised in the Midwest, Dr. Stork is a fervent believer in helping patients feel empowered when it comes to their health. Dr. Stork practices what he preaches and likes to teach by example, biking to work every day, rain or shine. While he doesn't expect individuals to give up their cars, he is passionate about enlightening individuals on simple ways to attain and maintain good health based on their own life and circumstances. He believes that oftentimes, when people come to the E.R., it's already too late. That's why he takes such pride in teaching people how to avoid preventable illness before it happens. Most people don't realize that they make over 200 health-related decisions every day that dictate how well and how long they live. Dr. Stork believes health is not about the gym or a deprivation diet; health is achieved by focusing on those seemingly inconsequential 200-plus decisions people make throughout the day.

Reviews

[Kara Bauer · Rating 2 out of 5]

I want to punch this man in the head: 1. He was on the Bachelor 2. He is so haughty and 2D about the women he describes it is no wonder he is a minion of Dr. Phil 3. The main reason he deserves a good #$@! socking is there are several things in this book that are scarily dead-on. I want to cry...sorry ladies though he is but a mere step up from a speaking Ken Doll, we can be crazy bitches sometimes. Mom I beg you please stop watching Dr. Phil...I actually promised the lady at Barnes & Noble that next time I'd buy literature.

[Tiarabeth · Rating 2 out of 5]

I don't normally pick up books like this. I find them superficial and vain. I picked this one up because it was 99cents and I was about to board a long flight home I decided why not.

Oh my gosh what a god awful book. This man should be hit upside the head. He knows nothing about women but wants to believe he does.

Girls don't read because if you have the least bit of self confidence you'll be upset and thinking you are one of these types. Trust me we at one time or another fall into his categories. You are better than this book and just because you feel a little needy one day isn't a bad thing your significant other still cares about you.

[Mehrnoosh HKH · Rating 4 out of 5]

من نسخه ی ترجمه شده ی این کتاب رو با عنوان مثل بعضی دخترها نباشید یا از ان تیپ دختر ها نباشیدخوندم.
این کتاب راجع به انواع دخترانی صحبت میکنه که با رفتارشون باعث میشن در روابط عاطفیشون شکست بخورن،ضربه ببینن و یا حتی تحقیر بشن.
نویسنده ی این کتاب که تراویس استورک ،پزشک بخش اورژانس هست،قصد داره با دادن توضیحات و پندهایی سعی کنه چشم دخترها رو در هنگام ایجاد رابطه ی عاطفی با مردی تا حدودی باز کنه.
کل کتاب به هشت بخش تقسیم میشه
1_دختران با برنامه
2_دختران همیشه موافق
3_دختران افراطی
4_دختران بد بین
5_دختران فاقد اعتماد به نفس
6_دختران درمانده
7_دختران پرکار
8_دختران سرگردان

در هر بخش توضیحاتی داده میشه که چرا یک دختر با چنین ویژگی هایی همیشه باید دچار شکست عاطفی بشه یا رابطه اش به بدترین شکل ممکن پیش بره.و قسمتی داره که مثل یک نوع ازمون روانشناسی هست و با انجام این ازمون متوجه میشید که آیا شما هم از همین دختران هستید یا نه.
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.اول فکر کردم این کتاب هم مثل خودت باش دختره.در همون حد پوچ و مسخره که فقط میخواد با گفتن جمله هایی مثل دختر تو عالی هستی و دیگران بدند،سرت رو به درد بیاره.اما خب اشتباه فکر میکردم.توی این کتاب به جای اینکه بگه شما عالی هستید و یه سری جمله ی امید بخش که تاثیر پذیری نه چندانی دارند،به کار ببره،راجع به صفات اخلاقی صحبت میکنه که باعث از بین رفتن رابطه میشه.نه تنها روابط عاطفی با یک مرد بلکه با دوستان معمولی.
تا بخش چهارمش که خیلی عالی بود ولی یه سری فصل هاش درست مثل این بود که انگار تمام مطالبش از یه سایت روانشناسی یا مثلا از
wikihow
گرفته شده .ولی در کل به نظرم جالب بود و فقط هم به کسایی این کتاب رو پیشنهاد میکنم که قصد ازدواج دارن و مدام با افراد مختلفی قرار ملاقات میذارن!
ممنونم از درسای عزیزم که بدون اینکه بدونه کتاب راجع به چیه این کتاب رو بهم هدیه داد
:D

[Shay · Rating 5 out of 5]

I like the story I thought the book was very interesting and you learn more about yourself as a women and what type of girl you are. There is the agenda girl; the girl that planned when to get married and when to have kids there is the yes girl; the girl that yes to everything just to make their partner's happy
The drama queen girl the one that make drama about everything ,the bitter girl the girl that hold a grudge about everything , the insecure girl, the desperate girl the one that says she need a boyfriend she believes that she needs a man to complete her just as much as she needs food and water to survive, the lost girl and the working girl.

My favorite character were the desperate girl cause I'm always so afraid of losing a guy attention that I agreed to have sex with him even if am not ready and I need to learn as young women that I am worth more than and I need to be valued and not be scared of losing their attention if they go their lost.

The book is mostly love i think no matter what kind of women you are learn how to accepts your flaws
There was this guy talking to this very attractive girl telling her how she looks very beautiful she says that when she looks in the mirror she is constantly disappointed by what she sees and the guy try and remind her how she gets hit on every time they go out she says that how guys are thy hit on everything that moves she was so insecure she didn't believe in herself.


Young woman or teenager should read that book especially if they are in a relationship or planning to just try and figure out who you are before jumping in something with someone else

[Jill · Rating 5 out of 5]

That girl? Yes, you know what I mean – the girl with the agenda, the Yes girl, the Drama Queen girl, the Bitter girl or... I could go on – there are so many ‘types’ according to Stork. As an ER doctor, Stork has met them all and, in Don’t be that girl he examines each category of girl, describes their identifying traits and tells you what men don’t like about them. He provides mini quizzes to help you discover whether you are that girl, and tells you what, for men, is the dead giveaway for each ‘type’. But this is not just a mere male having a rant. I actually think his observations are spot on, and it is quite refreshing to have a male point of view on this topic. Moreover, he tempers his comments by giving guidance as to how to avoid being that girl. Subtitled ‘a guide to finding the confident, rational girl within’, Don’t be that girl provides plenty of insight and is a great read for those of you who enjoy self-help books.

[C · Rating 1 out of 5]

The best thing about this book is the cover. It's not funny or insightful, and it's written by a former bachelor from The Bachelor show--that should say it all. I picked it up at a used bookstore to give to a friend as part of her bachelorette gift, but I don't think anyone would enjoy this unless they were a Bachelor-fanatic. I'm embarrassed that I spent $2.50 on it.

[Patricia Atkinson · Rating 3 out of 5]

this book was mostly to find out what kind of girl you are and to correct the problem to help you in future relationships.i found it was more geared for teenagers than adult women but it was interesting and a bit comical to.

[Aimee Warrington · Rating 1 out of 5]

I found this book to be boring, sexist and retarded.

[Lael · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. I have highlighed each chapter and am now passing it out to each "that girl" friend. I literally have a friend that falls EXACTLY in to every category. I love his blunt and unapologetic tone (while still managing to be a nice guy). I find him credible since he is oh-so-handsome and has dated so many women. He's seen the extent at which women will go to find Mr. Right. Here's why this book rocks: It gives signs of why you are "that girl", and gives you tips on how to change your behavior. Great book club read for single girls. Two-day read tops.

[Noor · Rating 2 out of 5]

i read this kind of books from time to time because they are usually funny or sometimes have useful wisdom. this one had neither. it was shallow and stupid and i just couldn't make it to the last page. i didn't know the author of this book until after i bought it. had i known he was associated with dr. phil i would have never picked it up for that humungous price because i would have guessed the contents as they are now.

[Melissa Roberge · Rating 5 out of 5]

So far this book is great I just bought it today. It tells you what type of girl you don't want to be & if your that type of girl it helps you to get out of the type of girl stage you are in that no guy wants to date.

Every Girl Should Read This

[Veronica Wortman · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nothing ground breaking or earth shattering but just a no nonsense reminder that it is important to approach dating with a fun and open attitude - above all, remaining true to the person you are, regardless of who you may be with. Good quick read. Good solid message.

[Kaylie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very interesting, and it's all true! I could label myself as The Agenda Girl. And the advice he gave was spot on and I seem to be doing better in relationships. Great book to read if your having trouble with the men

[Bridgette · Rating 2 out of 5]

Pretty obvious stuff....if you really need guidance from this book, you are definitely that girl already.

[StarST8 · Rating 2 out of 5]

Hilarious book!!!!
Quick read. Can't be taken seriously.

[Whitney]

love love love this book!

[Jaclyn Edgehouse · Rating 3 out of 5]

good book from a man's perspective. written like a self help with usual quips. don't read it if you're a feminist or think men don't know anything.

[Arenee823]

Definitely told from a guys guy point of view and voice. This is not the book that will drive you to better health, but it is *an* outside perspective on how you may be perceived if you have a tendency to lean into any of these..."types". Included: the type of advice you could get from anyone.

[Followingangel7 · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought it would be a fun pointless read because I’m a guy but it was soo informative of how even I have been that girl.. not disappointed will recommend.

[E.H. Nolan · Rating 3 out of 5]

If the absolutely hilarious cover doesn’t catch your attention, the synopsis definitely will. And despite the title, this book isn’t just for girls. Okay, it’s mostly for girls. The girl who make excuses for her boyfriend when she really should be breaking up with him. The girl who is so angry and hurt from her last heartache she crushes everyone around her with negativity. The girl who doesn’t know how to say no. In other words, “that” girl.

Written by a man, who by his own definition, is a real catch and has had ample experience with all types of women, this self-professed expert separates his book into different “that” girls, helping readers identify which self-destructive behaviors they might be exhibiting and how to break the cycle. Why would any man want to read this, you might ask? Well, there’s always that really mean guy who hates women, and he might pick this up as a laugh at how the female population struggles—you know, “that” guy.

At times sensitive, at times a little on the harsh side, I tried to cut Travis L. Stork a little slack and chose to believe he really wrote this book to help women, not to vent about how he views and categorizes women. Some readers might be offended, some might really find it helpful. This isn’t a traditional relationship self-help book. It doesn’t help readers figure out men’s inner workings, and it doesn’t help improve current or future relationships. This is strictly a “get your groove back, sister” book, to help the shy, insecure, frightened girls gain confidence and self-worth. If that premise, plus a little tough love thrown in, sounds good to you, head on over to Amazon and give it a try.

http://hottoastyrag.weebly.com/dont-b...

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. I don't date men but I think it was useful regardless. I've read many reviews from women who have extreme hatred for this author but I think he was dead on. Reading the examples of these women, I know I personally wouldn't wan to date them. I"m sure most other women and men wouldn't want to either. No one's saying you have to be perfect all the time but the women he speaks about are exaggerations of the normal, sane woman. The type of people these women will attract are always true. Back when I drank at all, the alcohol killed my self esteem and I can find my past self in many of these women. What a mess!! I attracted the exact type of people he mentions too. I think many of the women giving this super bad reviews may just be in denial.

[Tina · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was a funny and honest book... but it didn't help me at all. I'm still just as much a mess as I ever was. I'd say these books are more humorous than helpful. If you're a crazy type of chick (as am I), it's not like you're actually going to take the advice that these types of books have to offer.

[ضهرا درعلی]

خوب بودا،ولی خب با توجه به صحبت هایی که با حمید درباره این کتاب کردیم ترجیح دادم کامل نخونمش.صد صفحشو خوندم فقط.
ولی خب توصیه میکنم .حداقل به همین صد صفحه ای که خودم خوندم:دی

[Stodds · Rating 1 out of 5]

this book is the one they hand you when you walk into the gates of hell