Patrick

by Kirby Lighthouse

What if you found the love of your life, but he looked nothing like you ever expected?A year after a brutal breakup leaves him jaded and depressed, anxious Los Angeles millennial and hopeless romantic Mitchell gets set up on a blind date with a young attorney named Patrick. The guy sounds downright delectable—a successful professional with a flashy job, sharp wit, and an unbelievably sweet personality.There’s just one catch.While most of Patrick’s body is perfectly conventional, from the neck up, he’s shaped like…a pumpkin pie.Oh. My. Gourd.Patrick’s improbable face sends Mitchell’s head spinning, but a fluttering heart can’t Mitchell feels a connection and it feels so right. Now both Mitchell and Patrick must dig deep to find out if their relationship is strong enough to overcome their insecurities, conquer their demons, and silence their fear of the unknown. Will their love stay whole or will it crumble to pieces? Dig in to find out!***Patrick is a delicious debut novel that delivers a whimsical and touching twist of magical realism to the contemporary gay romance genre. At just over 80,000 words, this is a standalone book and features a guaranteed HEA, a humorous cast of queer and allied supporting characters, a healthy dose of angst, and trips to fun, iconic locations in and around Los Angeles. Now who wants a slice?

Genres: Romance

306 pages, Kindle Edition

Published November 15, 2019

About the author

Kirby Lighthouse was the kid with the big imagination. The one who invented his own superheroes, argued with teddy bears, and turned cardboard boxes into spaceships traveling at the speed of light. Now, as an author of contemporary gay romance, he channels that same imagination into his writing, crafting emotionally-engaging modern love stories with a magical twist. Kirby’s characters grapple with the complex realities of post-closet adult life and find personal growth through the power of love, humor, empathy, friendship, and compassion.

Reviews

[Shelba · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF @ 26%.

I’ll start by noting that I don’t think CWs should be thrown in the middle of the Copyright page, especially when the TOC lists that page as “Copyright”, with no mention of content warnings. And shoved between the disclaimer and cover design information, it’s easily overlooked. (Also, the trigger warnings don’t mention the f-slur being used a handful of times)

There’s a lot of long winded dialogue in this book. There’s the Nebraska safe haven law. There’s this big huge exchange that last pages about RuPaul’s Drag Race and how it seems rigged (*gasp* you don’t say?!).

The absolute worse case of this was Patrick’s “big, full-length, uncut version” of his one and only second date is 10 paragraphs of dialogue. 10. Without break. 1815 words. I’ve read entire books shorter than that. But Patrick just goes on and on and on and on, without a single interpretation. There’s just one closing quotation mark. Take a breath, bud.

There’s also a lot of pop culture stuff. Zendaya, Ariana Grande, Zac Efron, Drag Race (multiple times), MUNA (whoever they are), and Trump impressions.

Ugh, why? So after the second Trump impression, because clearly one was not enough, I’m at the end of my patience.

Like, someone better be getting their pie hole fucked. Otherwise, what is the point?! If you face fuck a pumpkin pie headed man, is it like fucking a pie? But once their kiss is described just as “good”, not even a mention of his lips tasting like pumpkin spice or some such nonsense, I lost hope.

So, at this point I search the book for words. Suck, dick, cock, thrust, lube, lick… it doesn’t look like we are getting any cream with this pumpkin pie.

And I’m fine with books without sex, but really, what is the point? I’m not reading about a pumpkin pie headed dude for the romance. I’m here to find out how you fuck a pumpkin pie headed guy. Does he jizz whip cream? More purée? If you face fuck him, is it like fucking a literally pie? Can you take a bite out of his head and is it cannibalism if his head is a literal dessert?

These are the things I’m here for, not neverending dialogue, Drag Race and Trump impressions.

[R.D. Pires · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I read in the description that this book featured a man with a pumpkin pie for a head, I thought, "What a bizarre concept for a romance that's otherwise realistic."

That first impression proved true, but the titular character's crusty cranium is more than just a quirky gimmick. It strikes at the heart of one of "Patrick"s core themes: accepting each other's differences amid a judgemental society.

The story follows Mitchell, a jaded twenty-something who's been having a rough time after a breakup with his long-term partner and a falling out with his mother. Made cynical by the superficiality of the gay dating scene and suffering from depression, he reluctantly agrees to go on a blind date set up by one of his closest friends.

Enter Patrick; tall and successful with a pleasant physique. His only hang up is that his head is a literal pumpkin pie. Patrick's unfortunate mutilation (the product of a rare disease) has granted him a tumultuous life. Every social foray is like crossing a field full of landmines: you never know when the situation might explode. Despite all this, Patrick is surprisingly optimistic and level-headed. Well, round-headed, but you know what I mean.

The ensuing action is a roller coaster of emotions that finds both characters confronting and figuring out ways to grow beyond their traumas; learning to use each other as a support system in difficult times, rather than shutting everybody out. I found myself smiling at their undeniable chemistry, laughing at the quirky humor, and believing that it is possible to fall in love with a man whose head is a pumpkin pie.

This fresh baked take on the romance genre was a welcome way to start off my 2020, and I'm excited to see what Kirby Lighthouse has in store for us next. Throughout the narrative, he managed to navigate a breadth of serious themes about prejudice, mental trauma, and grief, without ever coming off heavy-handed.

Suffice to say, I'll be picking up his next book hot out of the oven, ready to dig in.

[Deborah Cohen · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Must Read!

Kirby Lighthouse delivers so much more than a typical gay romance. This story is about pure and complete, unconditional love. I absolutely loved it. It made me laugh, it made cry, it made me remember what it is to be human.

Mitchell is nursing a broken heart after a recent break-up, when his best friend talks him into going on a blind date. Mitchell isn't really ready to get back out there, but he goes anyway. The man he meets, Patrick, is sexy, intelligent, kind and very very unique. This is their story. A story of how two people can really see one another, understand one another, and love each other openly without judgement or shame. Because after all, love is love. Its a simple as that.

I can't wait to see what Kirby Lighthouse comes up with next!

[C.B. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting concept. Two men challenged, one physically and one emotionally decide to try and move forward in an emotional relationship anyway. Patrick influenced by a physical glitch that made him stand out and a symbol of awareness and curiosity. Mitchell, devestated from a breakup that hit all the worth thing ever buttons. Their journey though life's blocks, bridges and changes is heartening to watch. I personally could not see what the author was trying to paint as Patrick's head. The characters seemed young and naive.The characters seemed a bit over the top. Nice story, but the headshape was hard to envision. Nicely done. I received an ARC from Booksprout for a review.

[L H · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was not sure from the description what to expect from this book. It is not a story told in a typical fashion. It offers a unique take on love and acceptance. Although the story has a very distinct message it not heavy handed. The message is delivered in a unique and well crafted way that leaves you glad that you read it.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Jeanne Richardson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the 1st book I've read written by Kirby Lighthouse; she has done a great job at writing a good book; I can’t wait to read more of her books.

The story line caught my attention at the very beginning and kept me interested throughout the entire book.

I loved the chemistry between the characters.

I received a free copy of this book via booksprout and I’m voluntarily leaving a review.

[Shifty Bugger · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved the book, the story was well written and the characters were intriguing. Once I started I could not get enough, from the start till the end I was engrossed I was even on the edge of my seat with twists and turns, lust and passion, strength. Do yourself a favor and buy the book you want be disappointed.
Thank you for allowing me to review your book.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Clint · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have so many things to say about this book and how the author really took the time to introduce you to each character, but I'll limit my words so I don't give anything away (you should read this book). Told in first person, this novel explores the ups and downs of gay life and finding love. This is a "romance novel", emphasis on romance, that goes through the trials and tribulations of heart break and navigating dating as a gay man in LA. There's a surprising magical element that keeps you on your toes, let me tell you I was SHOOK, I hollered, and clutched my pearls. The book is exciting, sad, happy and full of love. I often say if a book can make me cry it's a damn good book, tears filled my eyes more than a few times during this fun read. It was great to see a novel about gay romance with actual romantic moments. To sum it up "Patrick" by Kirby Lighthouse Shantay you Stay.

[Mim Crenshaw · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. There were insecurities, trauma, and pain both emotionally and physically; and the author spun this tale in a way where it was bogged down and heavily emotionally draining to the reader. You will love every character in this book, even the supporting ones.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Christopher Snyder · Rating 5 out of 5]

Marvelous!

I have to admit I was skeptical of the premise going in, but I'm so glad I spent my day with these marvelous characters. This is one of the best books I've read this year. It's a wonderfully complicated, fearlessly vulnerable, laugh-inducing, unfiltered emotional roller-coaster ride, and I loved every single moment of it. Take the leap! You will not be disappointed.

[Tayra Sanders · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book hooked me from the beginning. I just couldn’t put it down. I fell for these characters and, what a story just perfect.

[Annemarie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mitchell had his heart broken. Now he is set up on a blind date with Patrick. Patrick is successful, sexy, but has his own issues. Loved this storyline! In the end love is love.