I started this but I am not going to finish. I love that this is a cause that is very close to her heart. I think it important we all find something to dedicate and give our time and love to. I felt she was a bit arrogant and negative about how others have tried to help. I felt like she thought the only way to do good is her way. I don’t believe that and got tired of that underlining theme. I do admire her passions and conviction.
Enjoyed this book even though I am not personally involved with adoption. Would highly recommend this to someone who is thinking about adoption or who has already adopted.
Cheri Register has two adult children adopted from Korea in the 1980's. Her perspective therefore is heavily influenced by both her children and other adult adoptees.
Each chapter is an essay on a topic important to international adoption. She starts by presenting a worst case scenario, and then discusses the theme or issues that it brings up. Examples include hovering too much and assuming that everything has to do with your child's adoption, learning to understand that your child is going to be angry sometimes and you can't take it personally, appreciating that race is going to be an issue in your child's life, and working to find a good balance between appreciating your child's culture and making her an exotic little doll.
The last topic struck me because it was one I hadn't read in a lot of other books. Her daughters didn't always feel comfortable going to Korean cultural events, or rather, they didn't always feel comfortable going with her. She advocates making your own connections to your child's culture and giving them the option of exploring them on their own.
Written by an adoptive mother, Beyond Good Intentions sensitively examines some of the practical and ethical questions regarding international adoption. This book is useful for illustrating this pro-adoption viewpoint and also offering many topics for further exploration and discussion.
We adopted our daughter as an infant from Vietnam. She's now seven. I read this book as we waited for her and liked it then, but it was wonderful to go back and read it a few years later. A must read for parents adopting internationally.