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Walk with Me
While Elizabeth gets a bit of excellent advice from her friend Charlotte Collins while staying at the Hunsford Parsonage, it is the fact that the encounter with Colonel Fitzwilliam occurs a day early that changes the dynamics of her stay at the Parsonage.
319 pages, ebook
First published August 18, 2015
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Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
July 23, 2019
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/11340466/1/
The most impressive thing here is how well this author matches her writing to Jane Austen's. Much of the story uses JA's words even though there's a lot of variation in the plot, and P.R. Hood's contributions are seamless. High praise, indeed!
The departure from canon is unique. It starts in Kent, where Elizabeth has four significant NEW conversations. The one with Colonel Fitzwilliam where he spills the beans about Darcy separating Bingley from Jane Bennet happens a day earlier than canon.
But then Elizabeth has four additional significant dialogues. First, Colonel Fitzwilliam makes a point to speak with her again the following day. Two chats are with Charlotte, who makes salient observations regarding both Mr. Wickham and Mr. Darcy. The last is with Mr. Darcy himself, but he knows better than to propose marriage. Aware that Colonel Fitzwilliam told Elizabeth about his involvement in keeping Mr. Bingley from returning to Hertfordshire, Darcy explains his reasoning. No letter, though some of the letter's contents are used in this section. He also informs Elizabeth that he has NEVER disliked her.
Darcy surprises Elizabeth by calling on her when she goes to the Gardiners in Cheapside. Having been convinced by Elizabeth's superior knowledge of her sister's feelings that he was wrong, he tells her he will do all he can to correct his error. Then he asks to court her. Elizabeth agrees reluctantly. She still only barely likes Darcy, believing he's too arrogant and class-conscious. She makes him agree to several stipulations, the most significant of which is that he should NOT depend upon it ending with their betrothal.
This changes the trajectory of the rest of the story. Elizabeth stays longer with the Gardiners so she can get to know Darcy under her family's radar - only her father and Jane are aware they are courting. Wickham's lack of character is exposed earlier, though Lydia still isn't convinced she should stay clear of him. Once Elizabeth returns to Longbourn, her courtship with Darcy is no longer a secret, and now he is challenged to improve the neighborhood's poor opinion of him.
There's a lot to like here. The author cleverly manipulates JA's text to work using different speakers or at different times in the story. As I said earlier, the writing is excellent throughout despite minor editing errors that are less common than usual in unpublished works.
However, it's a very long book, and it feels that way. All the misunderstandings and obstacles are cleared away so early that it's just a question of Elizabeth getting to know the real man behind the Mr. Darcy mask. Since none of that is a surprise to the dedicated JAFF reader, it feels like nothing much is happening beyond day-to-day activities with Elizabeth gradually understanding Darcy better. There is a subplot of Wickham running amok, and Darcy's investigators and Colonel Fitzwilliam's men are unable to find him, but that sort of pops in for a few pages at a time and then disappears into the background for a while until it emerges again later. I found myself forcing myself to keep reading at times despite the beautiful writing because the story just lost steam after the first few chapters.
Overall, it's quite good but not very exciting. Content is clean.
The most impressive thing here is how well this author matches her writing to Jane Austen's. Much of the story uses JA's words even though there's a lot of variation in the plot, and P.R. Hood's contributions are seamless. High praise, indeed!
The departure from canon is unique. It starts in Kent, where Elizabeth has four significant NEW conversations. The one with Colonel Fitzwilliam where he spills the beans about Darcy separating Bingley from Jane Bennet happens a day earlier than canon.
But then Elizabeth has four additional significant dialogues. First, Colonel Fitzwilliam makes a point to speak with her again the following day. Two chats are with Charlotte, who makes salient observations regarding both Mr. Wickham and Mr. Darcy. The last is with Mr. Darcy himself, but he knows better than to propose marriage. Aware that Colonel Fitzwilliam told Elizabeth about his involvement in keeping Mr. Bingley from returning to Hertfordshire, Darcy explains his reasoning. No letter, though some of the letter's contents are used in this section. He also informs Elizabeth that he has NEVER disliked her.
Darcy surprises Elizabeth by calling on her when she goes to the Gardiners in Cheapside. Having been convinced by Elizabeth's superior knowledge of her sister's feelings that he was wrong, he tells her he will do all he can to correct his error. Then he asks to court her. Elizabeth agrees reluctantly. She still only barely likes Darcy, believing he's too arrogant and class-conscious. She makes him agree to several stipulations, the most significant of which is that he should NOT depend upon it ending with their betrothal.
This changes the trajectory of the rest of the story. Elizabeth stays longer with the Gardiners so she can get to know Darcy under her family's radar - only her father and Jane are aware they are courting. Wickham's lack of character is exposed earlier, though Lydia still isn't convinced she should stay clear of him. Once Elizabeth returns to Longbourn, her courtship with Darcy is no longer a secret, and now he is challenged to improve the neighborhood's poor opinion of him.
There's a lot to like here. The author cleverly manipulates JA's text to work using different speakers or at different times in the story. As I said earlier, the writing is excellent throughout despite minor editing errors that are less common than usual in unpublished works.
However, it's a very long book, and it feels that way. All the misunderstandings and obstacles are cleared away so early that it's just a question of Elizabeth getting to know the real man behind the Mr. Darcy mask. Since none of that is a surprise to the dedicated JAFF reader, it feels like nothing much is happening beyond day-to-day activities with Elizabeth gradually understanding Darcy better. There is a subplot of Wickham running amok, and Darcy's investigators and Colonel Fitzwilliam's men are unable to find him, but that sort of pops in for a few pages at a time and then disappears into the background for a while until it emerges again later. I found myself forcing myself to keep reading at times despite the beautiful writing because the story just lost steam after the first few chapters.
Overall, it's quite good but not very exciting. Content is clean.
August 22, 2024
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11340466/1/
Colonel Fitzwilliam reveals Darcy's interference with Bingley and Jane but also speaks the truth about Wickham
Colonel Fitzwilliam reveals Darcy's interference with Bingley and Jane but also speaks the truth about Wickham
July 24, 2019
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11340466/1/
25 chapters; rating: clean, contains minor violence; angst: low-medium: This was a beautifully written story although it was way too long. There was a quick epilogue and it was interesting to see our characters 50 years later. I enjoyed that. Debbie Brown wrote a most excellent review and I agree completely with everything she said. Be sure and read it.
It was fun walking the Austen Trail through this P&P variation. Occasionally we would take a side venture to check out new scenery. Then we would come back to the Austen Trail again and continue on for a while until we checked out another vista. There was a lot of canon in this variation. I found it interesting that I had trouble discerning where Austen left off and Hood picked up. That was doing a number on my brain as were the juxtaposition of events and situations. It was as if Hood had taken the P&P story and tossed it in the air. The pieces were all there but some of them were arranged in a different configuration. It was fun watching familiar scenes and dialogue, that we all know by heart, given to someone else, used in a different scene, or even combined with other dialogue. Fascinating.
I was intrigued by how our author included the reader in the evolution of Elizabeth’s thoughts and feelings for our Darcy. There was none of that dislike-to-instant-love that everyone hates. No, we walked side-by-side [perhaps a bit too long] with our girl as she reevaluated her misunderstandings and watched as, one-by-one, her prejudices, and dislike were put aside. Some of that introspection became a bit tedious and drawn out with Lizzy constantly needing to be alone so she could think. She was one obstinate, headstrong creature and I began to tire of her. I liked Charlotte’s sense and logical reasoning as she tried to reach/breakthrough her friend’s stubborn resistance. She knew Lizzy well.
I loved the way the author used our dear Colonel Fitzwilliam to help our misguided girl realize her error in judgment early-on during her stay in Kent. This really turned the story. It also prevented or circumvented the DHP [Disastrous-Hunsford-Proposal]. Not to be denied, our girl was still able to express [loud and clear] her sentiments to our Darcy. She quickly pointed out his egregious behavior at the Meryton Assembly with his ungentlemanly behavior, comportment, and deportment. I think our girl left a mark. “Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.” –Muhammad Ali
Villain: Our resident villain was Wickham [that SBRB] that made his presence known throughout our story. He was like that arcade game ‘Whack-A-Mole’. A pervasive problem that kept popping up throughout the story causing anxiety for our characters. Colonel Fitzwilliam joined forces with Colonel Forster and the __shire militia as they hunted for the deserter. He had the uncanny ability to ‘pop-up’ and disconcert our girl and Darcy no matter where they were staying. He seemed to know their location as he followed them to London and back to Hertfordshire. I wondered who was giving him intel on their location? We would learn that later in the story.
What I didn’t like: One niggling point kept bothering me. There was all this danger hanging over their heads and Lizzy was fanatical in her desire/demands to walk. I kept thinking… really? This was London and not the trails on her home farm. Every day she had to walk and we are talking power-walking. A brisk walk of that nature would be considered scandalous and Darcy was right there with her if he could manage it. Otherwise, it would be a footman/guard, if they could keep up. Darcy was so cocksure sure that Elizabeth was safe, as long as he was with her, that I don’t think they were as cautious as they should have been. If no one was safe… why didn’t a footman also go with them… as a back-up if nothing else? Really? This was Wickham we’re talking about. No one was safe… including Darcy. Just a little something that didn’t feel right.
Maybe it was me but I didn’t feel the love for some reason. It seemed a bit sterile. I heard the words and I desperately wanted to lean into my reading device but it just wasn’t there. I suppose that was the way society comported themselves back then and they were acting appropriately for the era. Oh well.
What I liked: A conversation [which was augmented by our dear Colonel] between Darcy and Mrs. Bennet. I’ve always wanted someone to have this conversation with her on the expectations of London Society and what encompassed a Season for young ladies. This was very enlightening and I was so glad to see it. Someone needed to get through to Mrs. Bennet.
25 chapters; rating: clean, contains minor violence; angst: low-medium: This was a beautifully written story although it was way too long. There was a quick epilogue and it was interesting to see our characters 50 years later. I enjoyed that. Debbie Brown wrote a most excellent review and I agree completely with everything she said. Be sure and read it.
It was fun walking the Austen Trail through this P&P variation. Occasionally we would take a side venture to check out new scenery. Then we would come back to the Austen Trail again and continue on for a while until we checked out another vista. There was a lot of canon in this variation. I found it interesting that I had trouble discerning where Austen left off and Hood picked up. That was doing a number on my brain as were the juxtaposition of events and situations. It was as if Hood had taken the P&P story and tossed it in the air. The pieces were all there but some of them were arranged in a different configuration. It was fun watching familiar scenes and dialogue, that we all know by heart, given to someone else, used in a different scene, or even combined with other dialogue. Fascinating.
I was intrigued by how our author included the reader in the evolution of Elizabeth’s thoughts and feelings for our Darcy. There was none of that dislike-to-instant-love that everyone hates. No, we walked side-by-side [perhaps a bit too long] with our girl as she reevaluated her misunderstandings and watched as, one-by-one, her prejudices, and dislike were put aside. Some of that introspection became a bit tedious and drawn out with Lizzy constantly needing to be alone so she could think. She was one obstinate, headstrong creature and I began to tire of her. I liked Charlotte’s sense and logical reasoning as she tried to reach/breakthrough her friend’s stubborn resistance. She knew Lizzy well.
I loved the way the author used our dear Colonel Fitzwilliam to help our misguided girl realize her error in judgment early-on during her stay in Kent. This really turned the story. It also prevented or circumvented the DHP [Disastrous-Hunsford-Proposal]. Not to be denied, our girl was still able to express [loud and clear] her sentiments to our Darcy. She quickly pointed out his egregious behavior at the Meryton Assembly with his ungentlemanly behavior, comportment, and deportment. I think our girl left a mark. “Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.” –Muhammad Ali
Villain: Our resident villain was Wickham [that SBRB] that made his presence known throughout our story. He was like that arcade game ‘Whack-A-Mole’. A pervasive problem that kept popping up throughout the story causing anxiety for our characters. Colonel Fitzwilliam joined forces with Colonel Forster and the __shire militia as they hunted for the deserter. He had the uncanny ability to ‘pop-up’ and disconcert our girl and Darcy no matter where they were staying. He seemed to know their location as he followed them to London and back to Hertfordshire. I wondered who was giving him intel on their location? We would learn that later in the story.
What I didn’t like: One niggling point kept bothering me. There was all this danger hanging over their heads and Lizzy was fanatical in her desire/demands to walk. I kept thinking… really? This was London and not the trails on her home farm. Every day she had to walk and we are talking power-walking. A brisk walk of that nature would be considered scandalous and Darcy was right there with her if he could manage it. Otherwise, it would be a footman/guard, if they could keep up. Darcy was so cocksure sure that Elizabeth was safe, as long as he was with her, that I don’t think they were as cautious as they should have been. If no one was safe… why didn’t a footman also go with them… as a back-up if nothing else? Really? This was Wickham we’re talking about. No one was safe… including Darcy. Just a little something that didn’t feel right.
Maybe it was me but I didn’t feel the love for some reason. It seemed a bit sterile. I heard the words and I desperately wanted to lean into my reading device but it just wasn’t there. I suppose that was the way society comported themselves back then and they were acting appropriately for the era. Oh well.
What I liked: A conversation [which was augmented by our dear Colonel] between Darcy and Mrs. Bennet. I’ve always wanted someone to have this conversation with her on the expectations of London Society and what encompassed a Season for young ladies. This was very enlightening and I was so glad to see it. Someone needed to get through to Mrs. Bennet.
February 1, 2025
I read this fan fiction on DWG and liked it a lot. The colonel tells Lizzy about Wickham while at Rosings, and Darcy is spared a humiliating rejection and proceeds to court her while she's with the Gardiners.
https://www.dwiggie.com/derby/peter3.htm
Re-reading 7/22
Rereading on ffnet 2/24 : noticed minor inconsistencies, eg. Lydia was told of not going to Brighton and in the next chapter had to be told again.
https://www.dwiggie.com/derby/peter3.htm
Re-reading 7/22
Rereading on ffnet 2/24 : noticed minor inconsistencies, eg. Lydia was told of not going to Brighton and in the next chapter had to be told again.
July 29, 2019
Well written. I was just bored. It's not that different from Cannon. also, I thought Lizzy was trying to make Darcy into a person he is not rather than understanding his character and respecting him for it. That annoyed me so I only give 3 stars. it's probably more around 3.5. Good read but I was looking for something a bit different from the original.
November 21, 2019
A new focus in the story compared to most other variations. Most variation are about how will Darcy learn about his pride, arrogance and prejudices. Lizzy is pursued by Darcy and often doesn’t recognize her own pride, arrogance and prejudices.
This story Lizzy is nagged, nicely but nagging is what is happening, by Charlotte and Aunt Gardiner. As both Lizzy and Darcy are both trying to unlearn bad behaviors that they learned at the knee of their respective fathers, they come to be a couple together with both sharing in changes.
I thought this was a nice original take on P&P. I recommend the story.
This story Lizzy is nagged, nicely but nagging is what is happening, by Charlotte and Aunt Gardiner. As both Lizzy and Darcy are both trying to unlearn bad behaviors that they learned at the knee of their respective fathers, they come to be a couple together with both sharing in changes.
I thought this was a nice original take on P&P. I recommend the story.
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews