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451 pages, Kindle Edition
First published July 28, 2019


“I’m a broken man.” I close my eyes and lean my head back. “I take it back; I was a broken man. Now I’m trying to piece all the pieces together, and I don’t have time for this.”
He watches me, his own tears in his eyes. “I can’t be your friend because I’m in love with you.” I say the words out loud instead of just in my head, and his breath hitches, and he opens his mouth. “I’m in love with you with everything that I have,” I tell him, “but it’s not enough. I can’t love you for both of us.”
“I want you to be proud of me. I want you to be proud to stand by my side. I want to be the man you beam with pride at when you introduce. I want to be the man who holds your fucking hand because I can.”
“Being an addict doesn’t define who you are.”
“It doesn’t,” I agree with her. “Accepting it and having the courage to face it defines who I am.”
“He walks with so much baggage that he can’t stand up straight,” she starts to say.
“Mom,” I say, looking down. “He’s a friend.”
“Yet you can’t seem to stop yourself from being drawn to him. You can’t seem to look at him and not want to be next to him. You want to help him carry all his baggage.”
“Isn’t that what you taught us?” I ask her, blinking away the tears. “Help people when they are down.”
“Yes,” she answers. “And to carry the ones we love.”
Evan comes over.
“Zoe, that dress is a bit much,” he says, looking at the deep V. “You need to burn that dress, actually.” He looks around. “M&M!” he shouts to the side and both Matthew and Max turn around. “Look at Zoe!” He points at me, and the smile on Matthew’s face disappears, and then Max throws his head back and bursts out laughing. It’s no surprise that Matthew charges over.
“Are you crazy?” he says, taking off his jacket and throwing it on me.
“She deserves a man who will put her first,” Matthew says. “She deserves a man who is going to love her with every single part of his being.” I listen to the words. “She deserves a man who is going to fight for her.”
“See you later,” he says, smiling. He leans down and kisses my lips.
“Dude,” Matthew says. “Seriously, that’s my sister.”
“Dude,” Viktor says. “Seriously, that’s mine.”

