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Matrimony
It's the fall of 1986, and Julian Wainwright, an aspiring writer, arrives at Graymont College in New England. Here he meets Carter Heinz, with whom he develops a strong but ambivalent friendship, and beautiful Mia Mendelsohn, with whom he falls in love. Spurred on by a family tragedy, Julian and Mia's love affair will carry them to graduation and beyond, taking them through several college towns, over the next fifteen years. Starting at the height of the Reagan era and ending in the new millennium, Matrimony is a stunning novel of love and friendship, money and ambition, desire and tensions of faith. It is a richly detailed portrait of what it means to share a life with someone-to do it when you're young, and to try to do it afresh on the brink of middle age.
291 pages, Paperback
First published October 2, 2007
27 people are currently reading
946 people want to read
About the author
Joshua Henkin
8 books274 followersJoshua Henkin's new novel, MORNINGSIDE HEIGHTS, has recently been published by Pantheon. He is also the author of the novels SWIMMING ACROSS THE HUDSON, a Los Angeles Times Notable Book; MATRIMONY, a New York Times Notable Book; and THE WORLD WITHOUT YOU, which was named an Editors' Choice Book by The New York Times and The Chicago Tribune and was the winner of the 2012 Edward Lewis Wallant Award for Jewish American Fiction and a finalist for the 2012 National Jewish Book Award. He lives with his wife and daughters in Brooklyn, NY, and directs and teaches in the MFA program in Fiction Writing at Brooklyn College.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 275 reviews
December 3, 2007
It's so boring. I'm finally finished. It spans WAY too much time, so the characters never really seem fleshed out. You just don't care enough about them. You don't feel the love between Josh and Mia, or the friendship between Josh and Carter. So, where there's heartbreak and betrayal, you don't even care, feel bad for them, root for them, etc. You just plod along waiting for stuff to happen. I read three other books, 300-400 pages each in a weeks time, while in the middle of this book.
August 27, 2007
I cannot figure out why I'm still reading this book. It's not very good. Sometimes I just stick with something just because I don't like the idea of not finishing, but I'm not sure why I care.
December 8, 2008
Carter Heinz and Julian Wainwright meet as freshmen at Graymont College. They both meet girls that they end up marrying. Matrimony, by Joshua Henkin, follows the relationship between Julian and Mia. They date all through college, living together by their senior year. When Mia’s mother discovers she has breast cancer, Mia proposes that she and Julian get married so that her mother can attend the ceremony. After graduation, Julian and Mia move to Michigan where she pursues her Masters and he works on a novel and teaches an occasional English Composition class. They seem to be happy, even though Julian feels like he doesn’t always fit in with Mia and her fellow students. Julian is still in contact with Carter and flies to California to attend Carter’s law school graduation. While he’s there he learns a secret that causes him to leave Mia on his return to Michigan. Mia stays in Michigan and Julian attends the Iowa Writers’ Workshop. When he finds out that his parents are getting divorced, Julian goes to New York to see them and he stops to see Mia on his way back to Iowa. I don’t want to give too much more of the story away, but I enjoyed this wonderful book about relationships and friendships and how we have to make compromises in our life.
April 25, 2013
Matrimony is a bad book, I have to say, cringingly so. I picked it up in a bookstore, saw a blurb on the back by Jennifer Egan calling it “beguiling,” and bought it. Now that I have read it, I interpret Egan’s reference to “effortless scenes” a little differently (as in, not much effort went into writing them), and can only surmise that she and Henkin are friends. I consider her blurb and all the gushing Amazon reviews you have to wade through to get to the truth about this book both a betrayal of readers’ trust and a testimony to the power of media savvy, which Henkin must have in spades. While I hated this book, I do grudgingly admire the positive attention he managed to draw to it.
Where to start? Have you ever noticed the look of strain on people’s faces when someone they barely know is describing some long-winded dream? (You probably get more opportunities to notice this if you live in Berkeley…) I say “someone they barely know,” because a close friend might understand where the images in the dream came from and have some insight into what message, if any, the dream conveys. But a stranger or a mere acquaintance won’t understand, and if they don’t know where the images came from, how could they possibly be interested in the dream? Only the dreamer knows what feelings informed the images in the dream and why they are important. Henkin’s book was like that for me. He simply didn’t convey enough of what was beneath the surface of his characters and the events in their lives, despite reams of details, for me to understand why this story and these characters mattered enough to write about. Here are some examples of the empty details that pass for character development in Matrimony:
Page 201: “And when his mother fed him she would imitate a plane, saying, ‘Zoom, zoom, zoom, into the landing field,’ moving the spoon like a propeller into his mouth.” (This is just an aside, but if the spoon is moving like a propeller, won’t the food fall off?)
Page 201: “Dalton. He’d gone there from kindergarten through twelfth grade. He’d always liked school, yet what he recalled most distinctly about Dalton was waiting for classes to let out. College had been easy by comparison. In high school he’d woken up at six-thirty in the morning, whereas in college he often didn’t rise until noon.” (Why does it matter what time he got up? It’s as if Henkin said to himself, “I’ve mentioned his old school, I should say something about it,” and wrote down whatever popped into his mind.)
Page 228: “She placed her underwear beneath her skirt so it wouldn’t be visible when the doctor came in, though she knew the doctor would be seeing her naked.”
This is an example of the clichés this book is rife with that add absolutely nothing to our understanding of the character or the scene. And this is a potentially dramatic scene in which one of the main characters thinks she might have cancer!
Over and over again while reading this book I asked myself, “Why does the reader need to know this?” Henkin seems to really want to write what he knows but, as my favorite of what I consider the “real reviews” on Amazon puts it: “Write what you know, unless everything you know is deadly dull.”
Where to start? Have you ever noticed the look of strain on people’s faces when someone they barely know is describing some long-winded dream? (You probably get more opportunities to notice this if you live in Berkeley…) I say “someone they barely know,” because a close friend might understand where the images in the dream came from and have some insight into what message, if any, the dream conveys. But a stranger or a mere acquaintance won’t understand, and if they don’t know where the images came from, how could they possibly be interested in the dream? Only the dreamer knows what feelings informed the images in the dream and why they are important. Henkin’s book was like that for me. He simply didn’t convey enough of what was beneath the surface of his characters and the events in their lives, despite reams of details, for me to understand why this story and these characters mattered enough to write about. Here are some examples of the empty details that pass for character development in Matrimony:
Page 201: “And when his mother fed him she would imitate a plane, saying, ‘Zoom, zoom, zoom, into the landing field,’ moving the spoon like a propeller into his mouth.” (This is just an aside, but if the spoon is moving like a propeller, won’t the food fall off?)
Page 201: “Dalton. He’d gone there from kindergarten through twelfth grade. He’d always liked school, yet what he recalled most distinctly about Dalton was waiting for classes to let out. College had been easy by comparison. In high school he’d woken up at six-thirty in the morning, whereas in college he often didn’t rise until noon.” (Why does it matter what time he got up? It’s as if Henkin said to himself, “I’ve mentioned his old school, I should say something about it,” and wrote down whatever popped into his mind.)
Page 228: “She placed her underwear beneath her skirt so it wouldn’t be visible when the doctor came in, though she knew the doctor would be seeing her naked.”
This is an example of the clichés this book is rife with that add absolutely nothing to our understanding of the character or the scene. And this is a potentially dramatic scene in which one of the main characters thinks she might have cancer!
Over and over again while reading this book I asked myself, “Why does the reader need to know this?” Henkin seems to really want to write what he knows but, as my favorite of what I consider the “real reviews” on Amazon puts it: “Write what you know, unless everything you know is deadly dull.”
Read
June 15, 2015Couldn't finish it. Kept not caring and not picking it up.
July 27, 2011
Did The PCC'ers Visit You On The Way to Marriage?
As Josh Henkin’s novel Matrimony kicks off, there is no sign of marriage, just college dorm hilarity when the PCC-ers—Peer Contraceptive Counselors—come for a visit to educate the new freshman dorm dwellers. Given the pacing, I forgot that this was a book that purported to be about marriage and I started to expect a story that took place in a small college over a couple of days, or at most, a semester. I could feel some of my own Love on the Big Screen story coming on when there was some early bathroom talk between the protagonist Julian and his roommate Carter:
It’s bad enough to pee in your own shower,” his roommate said. “But in a communal shower?” He looked up at Julian. “You don’t pee in the shower, do you?”
“No,” Juian said. From time to time, he had. Didn’t everyone?
I love Henkin’s timing with his “From time to time, he had,” line. The sentences are full of those sorts of attention-grabbing surprises, and you’ll hear a lot more from Julian and his roommate, interesting stuff, about how men navigate relationships, especially when those relationships overlap. Henkin deftly takes big jumps in time when it comes to the narrative, and this is mostly achieved by dividing the story into geographically organized sections: Northington, Ann Arbor, Berkley, Iowa City, and New York. It’s with these jumps in time that Henkin is able to go down into specific detail while still telling the story of what it is to be married, at least for Julian and his wife Mia.
Julian and Mia make decisions that have consequences and things happen to their marriage that sometimes happen in relationships. In reading the book, I’m reminded that I heard Henkin say several times at the Wesleyan Writers Conference something to this effect: When writing, you want smart characters who are capable of intelligent mistakes. While none of the events or mistakes that concern Mia and Julian are shocking, all of them are a surprise, probably because the range of things that can happen to any couple—get hit by a car, find out the apartment is full of rats, or make a million in the stock market—is nearly infinite. Things happen to the couple and it’s interesting to read about how each character responds and interacts with and toward their spouse.
Matrimony can sometimes feel like a book on the art of writing. Julian and his friend Carter are both writers who attend a workshop class taught by a Professor Chesterfield who spouts guidance such as this: “THOU SHALT NOT CONFUSE A SHORT STORY WITH A RUBIK’S CUBE.” I sometimes hear folks criticize writers who write books about characters who want to write books (I see their point) but I think the writing process of everyone who writes is so highly personal and individualized that it’s usually interesting to hear how writers do what they do. This is a book more about marriage than writing, but there’s also a funny bit where a character writes a story with a character who thinks about breaking up with their boyfriend for over 20 pages. Thankfully we don’t have to read the pages; we just comically hear about the story from other characters as the novel proceeds. In this way Henkin is a skilled comedian who uses repetition to make the joke even funnier than it was the first time.
Henkin keeps the language fresh, and for awhile I was thinking that maybe there was at least one vocabulary word for me on every page. Here’s a few I jotted down that I had to look up: petard, jejune, peremptoriness, bathetic, somnolent, and bivouacking. Of course there is much more to fresh language than my vocab list, but I found myself marking interesting word choices as I read. Most of the characters are book lovers and part of the reward for reading this novel was their lively wordplay banter.
For a guy like me who has spent a lot of time thinking about how relationships work and don’t work, Matrimony presents a view of marriage that makes sense to me: hard stuff happens and the couple tries to hang in together and on some levels they succeed and on others they fail. Part of what was interesting here was to see what the couple decides to do about splitting up or staying together. From the complexities of in-laws to a crazy dog in a small NYC apartment, Matrimony shows readers a marriage worth paying attention to.
As Josh Henkin’s novel Matrimony kicks off, there is no sign of marriage, just college dorm hilarity when the PCC-ers—Peer Contraceptive Counselors—come for a visit to educate the new freshman dorm dwellers. Given the pacing, I forgot that this was a book that purported to be about marriage and I started to expect a story that took place in a small college over a couple of days, or at most, a semester. I could feel some of my own Love on the Big Screen story coming on when there was some early bathroom talk between the protagonist Julian and his roommate Carter:
It’s bad enough to pee in your own shower,” his roommate said. “But in a communal shower?” He looked up at Julian. “You don’t pee in the shower, do you?”
“No,” Juian said. From time to time, he had. Didn’t everyone?
I love Henkin’s timing with his “From time to time, he had,” line. The sentences are full of those sorts of attention-grabbing surprises, and you’ll hear a lot more from Julian and his roommate, interesting stuff, about how men navigate relationships, especially when those relationships overlap. Henkin deftly takes big jumps in time when it comes to the narrative, and this is mostly achieved by dividing the story into geographically organized sections: Northington, Ann Arbor, Berkley, Iowa City, and New York. It’s with these jumps in time that Henkin is able to go down into specific detail while still telling the story of what it is to be married, at least for Julian and his wife Mia.
Julian and Mia make decisions that have consequences and things happen to their marriage that sometimes happen in relationships. In reading the book, I’m reminded that I heard Henkin say several times at the Wesleyan Writers Conference something to this effect: When writing, you want smart characters who are capable of intelligent mistakes. While none of the events or mistakes that concern Mia and Julian are shocking, all of them are a surprise, probably because the range of things that can happen to any couple—get hit by a car, find out the apartment is full of rats, or make a million in the stock market—is nearly infinite. Things happen to the couple and it’s interesting to read about how each character responds and interacts with and toward their spouse.
Matrimony can sometimes feel like a book on the art of writing. Julian and his friend Carter are both writers who attend a workshop class taught by a Professor Chesterfield who spouts guidance such as this: “THOU SHALT NOT CONFUSE A SHORT STORY WITH A RUBIK’S CUBE.” I sometimes hear folks criticize writers who write books about characters who want to write books (I see their point) but I think the writing process of everyone who writes is so highly personal and individualized that it’s usually interesting to hear how writers do what they do. This is a book more about marriage than writing, but there’s also a funny bit where a character writes a story with a character who thinks about breaking up with their boyfriend for over 20 pages. Thankfully we don’t have to read the pages; we just comically hear about the story from other characters as the novel proceeds. In this way Henkin is a skilled comedian who uses repetition to make the joke even funnier than it was the first time.
Henkin keeps the language fresh, and for awhile I was thinking that maybe there was at least one vocabulary word for me on every page. Here’s a few I jotted down that I had to look up: petard, jejune, peremptoriness, bathetic, somnolent, and bivouacking. Of course there is much more to fresh language than my vocab list, but I found myself marking interesting word choices as I read. Most of the characters are book lovers and part of the reward for reading this novel was their lively wordplay banter.
For a guy like me who has spent a lot of time thinking about how relationships work and don’t work, Matrimony presents a view of marriage that makes sense to me: hard stuff happens and the couple tries to hang in together and on some levels they succeed and on others they fail. Part of what was interesting here was to see what the couple decides to do about splitting up or staying together. From the complexities of in-laws to a crazy dog in a small NYC apartment, Matrimony shows readers a marriage worth paying attention to.
January 15, 2013
The characters are so self-indulgent that I couldn't care less about them because they are far too wrapped up in themselves. Julian is by far the worst. There is nothing noble about any of their pursuits.
Even Mia's mother's breast cancer, which is a major catalyst in the plot, ultimately lacks depth. It feels like the author doesn't know anything beyond his own life and when he attempts to reach beyond that, it delivers as false. For example, it REALLY bothered me that he created what was supposed to be an emotionally touching scene when Mia showers her mother after her surgery. However, the details make it false. After a mastectomy the patient isn't allowed to shower for several days because the scars must remained wrapped, but patients can have sponge baths. Yet in the book Mia is standing in the shower, with her mother leaning against her, as the movements of the shower head over her entire body are described. DId the author just skip all research entirely? He goes through the motions of the details we all know about -- like the hair falls out, a wig must be bought -- but it isn't real. Mia and her mother cry at the wig shop, but the author doesn't bring you into the event and I suspect it is because he doesn't really know or understand the emotions felt in that situation.
Even Mia's mother's breast cancer, which is a major catalyst in the plot, ultimately lacks depth. It feels like the author doesn't know anything beyond his own life and when he attempts to reach beyond that, it delivers as false. For example, it REALLY bothered me that he created what was supposed to be an emotionally touching scene when Mia showers her mother after her surgery. However, the details make it false. After a mastectomy the patient isn't allowed to shower for several days because the scars must remained wrapped, but patients can have sponge baths. Yet in the book Mia is standing in the shower, with her mother leaning against her, as the movements of the shower head over her entire body are described. DId the author just skip all research entirely? He goes through the motions of the details we all know about -- like the hair falls out, a wig must be bought -- but it isn't real. Mia and her mother cry at the wig shop, but the author doesn't bring you into the event and I suspect it is because he doesn't really know or understand the emotions felt in that situation.
April 7, 2009
Just posted my interview with Joshua Henkin http://wordstomouth.com/?p=442
Upon editing my chat with Josh, I realized this interview is as much for writers as it is readers. Josh, folds his life philosophies and his writing tips adeptly into MATRIMONY and our interview. He is an engaging conversationalist and a natural teacher, not to mention, of course, a gifted writer.
Upon editing my chat with Josh, I realized this interview is as much for writers as it is readers. Josh, folds his life philosophies and his writing tips adeptly into MATRIMONY and our interview. He is an engaging conversationalist and a natural teacher, not to mention, of course, a gifted writer.
May 8, 2022
This has the quiet, character-driven feel of an Anne Tyler book, but without the heart.
April 7, 2022
A quiet book but interesting. The blurb does not really say what this book is about.
September 22, 2010
*Giveaway on my blog of this book going on until 9/29*
Hard for me to give this one a star rating. I'm going with a 4 as an approximate star rating but you should probably just read my review to determine if you should read it. Not my star rating.
When I received this book, I really wasn't sure that I'd like it. The title turned me off for some reason. I'm weird like that. A title could make me want to pick up a book or pass it by no matter if the book is crap or really great. Am I the only one like this? Anyways, this book was one of those that exceeded my expectations.
This novel centers around Julian Wainwright, a privileged kid that just doesn't fit into the mold of your typical trust fund baby like many of his prep school classmates. Much to the dismay of his investment banker father, Julian is passionate about becoming a writer of great novels. The novel chronicles Julian's life through college and mid-adulthood as he finds friendship, love and success and learns how hard it can be hold on to it all.
I really enjoyed this novel. The pace was perfect for me, for the most part, and the characters were believable and interesting. I thought the relationships between Mia, his girlfriend turned wife, and Carter, his best friend, held the sort of family dynamic that I appreciate as someone who has built a family full of great friends. The familial relationships explored in this novel seemed genuine and I could relate to many of the issues constructed in the novel.
Henkin has a knack for delivering memorable characters. I love when I become fond of a minor character, who might just be in the book for a chapter or two, but their impact on the character weaves itself through the pages of the character's life. I loved Mr. Kang (the owner of the grocery store Julian goes to in college), Mr. Chesterfield (his writing professor) and Henry (a fellow grad student that we only meet for a little bit). These characters were crafted to be those types of people that we all encounter in our lives--the ones that are there for a little while but our memory of them is lasting and we think fondly of them.
I was really interested in how the college life was portrayed as I can never seem to find novels with main characters that are in college. The college life, despite the fact it was set in the late 80's, seemed to be pretty realistic aside from the fact it all seemed so much more formal and sophisticated than my college experience. At the heart of it was those late night pigout sessions at diners, laughing until you cry and doing some of the most random things you will ever do in your life. I also thought Henkin really portrayed that feeling of anxiety at being propelled into the adult world. They are all the things I'm going through right now--the prospect of an engagement, figuring out what I want to do with my life and just finding who I am as an adult.
Some of the reviews I had seen for this book deemed this book as boring and this made me worried. After reading the book, I would have to disagree. I am a fan of quiet stories that deal with ordinary lives but are interesting and thought-provoking in their own way. This book, for me, is like listening to some quiet, soulful woman sitting at a piano in the corner of a lounge. I am relaxed, maybe sipping a glass of wine, and enjoying the soothing sound of the voice in the background as I feel the love or the loss she sings about penetrating deeply within me. I am not entertained in the same way that I would be after attending a flashy, hip shaking Lady Gaga concert. There is a need for both of those in my life.
Similarly, it all depends on what you are looking for in a book when you read this. If you are looking for an action packed "Lady Gaga-esque" book that is plot based and keeps your heart racing, I would not recommend this to you. If you enjoy a novel with a beautiful sense of quietness that peers into the lives of everyday people, then `I think you would really enjoy this novel.
Hard for me to give this one a star rating. I'm going with a 4 as an approximate star rating but you should probably just read my review to determine if you should read it. Not my star rating.
When I received this book, I really wasn't sure that I'd like it. The title turned me off for some reason. I'm weird like that. A title could make me want to pick up a book or pass it by no matter if the book is crap or really great. Am I the only one like this? Anyways, this book was one of those that exceeded my expectations.
This novel centers around Julian Wainwright, a privileged kid that just doesn't fit into the mold of your typical trust fund baby like many of his prep school classmates. Much to the dismay of his investment banker father, Julian is passionate about becoming a writer of great novels. The novel chronicles Julian's life through college and mid-adulthood as he finds friendship, love and success and learns how hard it can be hold on to it all.
I really enjoyed this novel. The pace was perfect for me, for the most part, and the characters were believable and interesting. I thought the relationships between Mia, his girlfriend turned wife, and Carter, his best friend, held the sort of family dynamic that I appreciate as someone who has built a family full of great friends. The familial relationships explored in this novel seemed genuine and I could relate to many of the issues constructed in the novel.
Henkin has a knack for delivering memorable characters. I love when I become fond of a minor character, who might just be in the book for a chapter or two, but their impact on the character weaves itself through the pages of the character's life. I loved Mr. Kang (the owner of the grocery store Julian goes to in college), Mr. Chesterfield (his writing professor) and Henry (a fellow grad student that we only meet for a little bit). These characters were crafted to be those types of people that we all encounter in our lives--the ones that are there for a little while but our memory of them is lasting and we think fondly of them.
I was really interested in how the college life was portrayed as I can never seem to find novels with main characters that are in college. The college life, despite the fact it was set in the late 80's, seemed to be pretty realistic aside from the fact it all seemed so much more formal and sophisticated than my college experience. At the heart of it was those late night pigout sessions at diners, laughing until you cry and doing some of the most random things you will ever do in your life. I also thought Henkin really portrayed that feeling of anxiety at being propelled into the adult world. They are all the things I'm going through right now--the prospect of an engagement, figuring out what I want to do with my life and just finding who I am as an adult.
Some of the reviews I had seen for this book deemed this book as boring and this made me worried. After reading the book, I would have to disagree. I am a fan of quiet stories that deal with ordinary lives but are interesting and thought-provoking in their own way. This book, for me, is like listening to some quiet, soulful woman sitting at a piano in the corner of a lounge. I am relaxed, maybe sipping a glass of wine, and enjoying the soothing sound of the voice in the background as I feel the love or the loss she sings about penetrating deeply within me. I am not entertained in the same way that I would be after attending a flashy, hip shaking Lady Gaga concert. There is a need for both of those in my life.
Similarly, it all depends on what you are looking for in a book when you read this. If you are looking for an action packed "Lady Gaga-esque" book that is plot based and keeps your heart racing, I would not recommend this to you. If you enjoy a novel with a beautiful sense of quietness that peers into the lives of everyday people, then `I think you would really enjoy this novel.
October 27, 2013
First of all, did I just get a bad copy or what happened? Why did I have to wade through constant typos as if the editor was high or some kind of only slightly evolved monkey? I loved the liberal use of punctuation, but my favorite was how Julian's name every so often changed to Julien. Is this some kind of special name where the spelling choice is optional?
Okay. I didn't hate this book, actually I picked it up at work and became instantly mesmerized by Julian's beginning college and his interactions with Prof. Chesterfield.
Prof. Chesterfield was the most compelling character in the book, by far. But he wasn't in very much of the book. I don't have it with me, but I don't think he made it past the first chapter. And then much, much later, he was mentioned briefly (interestingly, after Julian pondered how in novels the reader will feel 'cheated' if something is brought out and then later ignored or not resolved). This would have been a far better book if Chesterfield were one of the main characters. Maybe the author ran out of things to say about him, which is unfortunate. It was kind of like the author gave me a delicious ice cream sundae and took it away from me after a couple of bites.
Then he replaced the sundae with one of those chocolate-strawberry swirls -- tasty enough, but no cherry or sprinkles on top. The story was there (subtle, but that's okay) and the characters were there, but they weren't delicious characters. Some of the bites actually left a sour taste in my mouth.
At the beginning, when Carter meets Pilar, I thought, here! Julian's left out and alone, some drama will happen. But no, that is resolved and he meets Mia, whom I never learned to like. Really, Mia just sounded whiny to me.
I did like following Julian's life and found his observations witty and cute. However, random problems:
-- Julian didn't seem to have any friends except for Carter. Some characters were completely unneeded, like Mr and Mrs Kang.
-- The story was not cohesive enough. It read too much like a real life story and not like something created as art/entertainment. Too much extraneous nonsense that did not drive the plot or the characters.
-- A lot of nothing happened even though the novel spanned a long period - for much of it nothing was at stake, there was no tension.
In spite of this, somehow I had to keep reading to find out what happened. Mostly I wondered what would happen to Julian and Mia, and I was waiting for more appearances from Chesterfield. The end was satisfying enough in this regard.
The author should write a new book all about Chesterfield.
Okay. I didn't hate this book, actually I picked it up at work and became instantly mesmerized by Julian's beginning college and his interactions with Prof. Chesterfield.
Prof. Chesterfield was the most compelling character in the book, by far. But he wasn't in very much of the book. I don't have it with me, but I don't think he made it past the first chapter. And then much, much later, he was mentioned briefly (interestingly, after Julian pondered how in novels the reader will feel 'cheated' if something is brought out and then later ignored or not resolved). This would have been a far better book if Chesterfield were one of the main characters. Maybe the author ran out of things to say about him, which is unfortunate. It was kind of like the author gave me a delicious ice cream sundae and took it away from me after a couple of bites.
Then he replaced the sundae with one of those chocolate-strawberry swirls -- tasty enough, but no cherry or sprinkles on top. The story was there (subtle, but that's okay) and the characters were there, but they weren't delicious characters. Some of the bites actually left a sour taste in my mouth.
At the beginning, when Carter meets Pilar, I thought, here! Julian's left out and alone, some drama will happen. But no, that is resolved and he meets Mia, whom I never learned to like. Really, Mia just sounded whiny to me.
I did like following Julian's life and found his observations witty and cute. However, random problems:
-- Julian didn't seem to have any friends except for Carter. Some characters were completely unneeded, like Mr and Mrs Kang.
-- The story was not cohesive enough. It read too much like a real life story and not like something created as art/entertainment. Too much extraneous nonsense that did not drive the plot or the characters.
-- A lot of nothing happened even though the novel spanned a long period - for much of it nothing was at stake, there was no tension.
In spite of this, somehow I had to keep reading to find out what happened. Mostly I wondered what would happen to Julian and Mia, and I was waiting for more appearances from Chesterfield. The end was satisfying enough in this regard.
The author should write a new book all about Chesterfield.
April 5, 2012
Slowly the story unfolds, bringing characters such as Waspy Julian Wainwright and scholarship student Carter Heinz to life, as they begin their journey as college students. We meet them in the eighties, during the Reagan era, and follow them into the twenty-first century.
College years in Northington, Massachusetts seem typical for the era. Pranks, partying, and finding girlfriends. The two young men, who could seem totally unlike one another, become fast friends.
Meeting Mia Mendelsohn, dubbed "Mia from Montreal" in honor of her Canadian residency, could have been another fluke. They each met her, but right away she and Julian pair up. And Carter has already connected to Pilar.
Julian and Carter both seem destined to write novels, yet their lives seemingly change directions. Carter returns to California and Julian and Mia move to Ann Arbor, Michigan, where Julian continues working on his novel, yet finds other ways to earn money.
It is almost as though the work in progress is a metaphor for their lives, and it will be many years before the novel is finished.
What are the pressure points for Julian and Mia that almost do them in? What happens, ultimately, to the Carter and Pilar pairing, and how do these youthful connections fare in the long run? Do the friendships last in spite of the frayed edges?
Fifteen years later at a reunion, we begin to see how the defining moments that highlighted their lives are the most memorable. In "Matrimony: A Novel (Vintage Contemporaries)," we are offered a portrait of what happens when people marry young and how love sometimes survives the passing of time.
I liked how the quiet moments in life are drawn and incorporated into the characters, almost as if they are captured in muted shades. I found Mia's thoughts about memories of childhood and her mother very poignant:
"She remembered these things, but they came back to her like cumulus clouds, as if she were descending through something she could no longer see."
Or Julian, describing what he learned about writing from his favorite professor:
"Write what you know about what you don't know," Julian said, "or what you don't know about what you know."
This story took me back to my younger years and the connections formed then and sustained for years afterwards. I like thinking about these moments that become part of who we are. I identified with the characters, even Julian and Carter, for their very human frailties. I would recommend this book for anyone who enjoys reminders of who we are and how we became that way. Four stars.
College years in Northington, Massachusetts seem typical for the era. Pranks, partying, and finding girlfriends. The two young men, who could seem totally unlike one another, become fast friends.
Meeting Mia Mendelsohn, dubbed "Mia from Montreal" in honor of her Canadian residency, could have been another fluke. They each met her, but right away she and Julian pair up. And Carter has already connected to Pilar.
Julian and Carter both seem destined to write novels, yet their lives seemingly change directions. Carter returns to California and Julian and Mia move to Ann Arbor, Michigan, where Julian continues working on his novel, yet finds other ways to earn money.
It is almost as though the work in progress is a metaphor for their lives, and it will be many years before the novel is finished.
What are the pressure points for Julian and Mia that almost do them in? What happens, ultimately, to the Carter and Pilar pairing, and how do these youthful connections fare in the long run? Do the friendships last in spite of the frayed edges?
Fifteen years later at a reunion, we begin to see how the defining moments that highlighted their lives are the most memorable. In "Matrimony: A Novel (Vintage Contemporaries)," we are offered a portrait of what happens when people marry young and how love sometimes survives the passing of time.
I liked how the quiet moments in life are drawn and incorporated into the characters, almost as if they are captured in muted shades. I found Mia's thoughts about memories of childhood and her mother very poignant:
"She remembered these things, but they came back to her like cumulus clouds, as if she were descending through something she could no longer see."
Or Julian, describing what he learned about writing from his favorite professor:
"Write what you know about what you don't know," Julian said, "or what you don't know about what you know."
This story took me back to my younger years and the connections formed then and sustained for years afterwards. I like thinking about these moments that become part of who we are. I identified with the characters, even Julian and Carter, for their very human frailties. I would recommend this book for anyone who enjoys reminders of who we are and how we became that way. Four stars.
May 8, 2009
Matrimony is the wonderful story of friendship, marriage, trust, betrayal and choices we make in life that effect our present and future. Matrimony follows the ever changing relationship between Julian and Mia from when they meet in college and are dating to their marriage and struggles into middle-age. Julian comes from a wealthy background, the only child growing up in New York City. He heads off to college to a small college in Massachusetts and his dream is to become a writer. He meets Carter in a writing class and a professor that has a great influence on them both. Julian and Carter become best friends even though they have little in common and come from very different backgrounds. Julian comes from a wealthy background who wants to distance himself from that lifestyle and world and Carter who comes from a poor background and envies and aspires for what Julian takes for granted.
They both find girlfriends, Julian meets Mia who is Jewish and he is not and both come from very different backgrounds as well. Carter meets Pilar and they all end up being housemates and the course of their relationships start to change. Life events alter things and Mia deals with a family crisis and follows with her and Julian marrying. They marry earlier than they had planned and this decision alters their relationship as they move forward towards the next chapters of their lives.
The course of events in their lives as they move forward in their futures effect change on them all within their marriages and friendships. I read the book in two days as I wanted to find out what would happen in Julian and Mia's lives. The college days had a slower start for me and then I was pulled in through to the end. I found Matrimony conveys the message that every marriage is full of complexities and is different and unique in it's own way. To me it also highlights how choices we make and how we manage those choices effect us all in different ways. If you enjoy a novel with strong insights and one that is character driven, make sure that you read Matrimony.
They both find girlfriends, Julian meets Mia who is Jewish and he is not and both come from very different backgrounds as well. Carter meets Pilar and they all end up being housemates and the course of their relationships start to change. Life events alter things and Mia deals with a family crisis and follows with her and Julian marrying. They marry earlier than they had planned and this decision alters their relationship as they move forward towards the next chapters of their lives.
The course of events in their lives as they move forward in their futures effect change on them all within their marriages and friendships. I read the book in two days as I wanted to find out what would happen in Julian and Mia's lives. The college days had a slower start for me and then I was pulled in through to the end. I found Matrimony conveys the message that every marriage is full of complexities and is different and unique in it's own way. To me it also highlights how choices we make and how we manage those choices effect us all in different ways. If you enjoy a novel with strong insights and one that is character driven, make sure that you read Matrimony.
July 29, 2012
Okay so sometimes to spice up my reading I find a book I liked an aspect of and go on Amazon to annoymously read their "Top Reviewers" and what hype they give a book based on their similarity to a book I have read..this week I chose The Embers and I was recommended that I try to read Matrimony and so I tried, and I didnt like it too much..The everyday, common life we all live is what I was interested in reading about, how a couple grows together and learns to love and trust but you feel cheated here...This is the story of two sets of college sweethearts and best friends Julian and Carter and their girlfriends Mia and Pilar respectively. It follows the boys as they meet, and eventually find the women they choose to spend their lives with and I chose to follow them. The characters dont feel as well developed as the story does if that makes any sense and though there are detailed descriptions and flashbacks of conversations and probable thoughts and intentions there is never enough to say you KNOW these characters and they seem flat and silly in their betrayals and secrets..If you can imagine going along for a ride impressed by others opinions of how fabulous this place is and how beautiful and scenic the drive will be and when its all said and done it was just a long tree lined road and you feel let down by the drive and the destination--I wanted to love this book not just for the story but for the way the writing would illuminate and make me feel the characters but sadly I didn't..Not really recommended but would search around for more books like this one or maybe more on a different subject by this author...
May 20, 2009
This book is a "quiet" reflection on a love story--over the course of twenty years. It was refreshing to read a book about what happens in the *after*: after one falls in love. The book is not filled with big, dramatic moments. It is the shifts in the day-to-day routines during and after life-course changes that give texture to the story. There is drama, as there always is in life, but the story feels incredibly true.
This book resides in two of my favorite genres-- love stories and stories about writers. The main character is a writer struggling to write his first novel. The novelist's partner is an academic, so I related to their lives.
I was in for a surprise, the second part of the novel takes place in Ann Arbor, MI, a place I know well. Although that part of the book sometimes made me laugh, it was eerily realistic. A little too realistic. The bookshop where I purchased the book even made an appearance!
Re: the bad reviews of this book--
Though the drama is "slow" this is not a slow read. If you sit down and commit to the story, it can be read in a couple of days. I read it in one or two days. I never felt compelled to skip or skim parts, as I often do with books that are "slow". The writing is not slow at all, nor is the story.
This book resides in two of my favorite genres-- love stories and stories about writers. The main character is a writer struggling to write his first novel. The novelist's partner is an academic, so I related to their lives.
I was in for a surprise, the second part of the novel takes place in Ann Arbor, MI, a place I know well. Although that part of the book sometimes made me laugh, it was eerily realistic. A little too realistic. The bookshop where I purchased the book even made an appearance!
Re: the bad reviews of this book--
Though the drama is "slow" this is not a slow read. If you sit down and commit to the story, it can be read in a couple of days. I read it in one or two days. I never felt compelled to skip or skim parts, as I often do with books that are "slow". The writing is not slow at all, nor is the story.
October 30, 2013
A bit unfair to unleash my frustration on this particular book--and admittedly I'm the one responsible for selecting the novels I read--but I feel as if I have read various iterations of this novel so many times in the past few years! The struggles of human relationships, of change, of achieving goals. Obviously these are important things to write about (and if there are really only seven plots, then it's fruitless to fault a writer's lack of originality). But only so many times can a protagonist trudge through the bitter chill of a Manhattan winter as he contemplates life before I get frustrated by reading the same book over and over again!
did-not-finish
January 3, 2017Another victim of my to-read list speed-dating project, I actually thought I liked this one after 30 pages, but after 100 (read in the dystopian setting of the local DMV), I just don't care enough to finish it up. This one suffers from trying to span too much time with not enough interesting detail or ideas.
August 23, 2014
This is a four by more on the 3.5 side. It was a good and fast read. I even stayed up late two nights because I couldn't put it down. However when I finished I couldn't helping thinking that there were some things missing from the story and the characterizations but nothing I could put my finger on.
March 8, 2009
This book was well-written, but the author kept the characters at a distance from the reader, if that makes sense. I like to think I have a good vocabulary, but there were several words I had to look up!
December 26, 2008
My review is here: http://legalmama.today.com/2008/12/25...
March 16, 2009
Sections take place in Ann Arbor AND New York City - what's not to like?!?
December 6, 2017
Onvan : Matrimony - Nevisande : Joshua Henkin - ISBN : 375424350 - ISBN13 : 9780375424359 - Dar 304 Safhe - Saal e Chap : 2007
September 29, 2024
I met Joshua Henkin almost a decade ago and really liked him. I think I must have decided then to read this novel – which would have been new – and I’m sorry it’s taken me this long.
I don’t know if everyone will enjoy this as much as I do, but it’s a strong novel with a lot of things that resonate from my experiences.
This begins with a pair of friends in college who are determined to become creative writers. I wasn’t quite in that world, but I know it well enough to appreciate the way Henkin captures it. There’s that heady ambition, that sense that you can see the three, four, or five unwritten books lined up on the shelf – that you can imagine yourself with the self-confident poise of someone who’s gone alone into the study and emerged with something the world is better off for having.
Then, in the middle of that, Julian falls for Mia. It’s immediate and, when her mother becomes sick, they decide to get married young. I’ll spare other plot elements as minor spoilers, but the novel – as the title reminds us -- deals with their experience as a married couple, one with ups and downs.
What really gets me is the specificity of their experiences. They live for a while in Ann Arbor – an Ann Arbor just a year or two after my own time there – and I felt as if I were walking around the streets with him. Zingerman’s – which opened around my sophomore year – had established itself as a landmark, and Kerrytown was around the corner. You could walk past the State Theater and David’s Books (where I once set a short story myself), and it all felt real and alive.
Things start to speed up later in the novel and I lose some of the sense of urgency from the beginning.
But, for a novel that captures that sense of being doubly in love – once with writing and once with someone who looks as if she answers all the questions you have about yourself – it would be hard to beat the ways this one takes me back.
I don’t know if everyone will enjoy this as much as I do, but it’s a strong novel with a lot of things that resonate from my experiences.
This begins with a pair of friends in college who are determined to become creative writers. I wasn’t quite in that world, but I know it well enough to appreciate the way Henkin captures it. There’s that heady ambition, that sense that you can see the three, four, or five unwritten books lined up on the shelf – that you can imagine yourself with the self-confident poise of someone who’s gone alone into the study and emerged with something the world is better off for having.
Then, in the middle of that, Julian falls for Mia. It’s immediate and, when her mother becomes sick, they decide to get married young. I’ll spare other plot elements as minor spoilers, but the novel – as the title reminds us -- deals with their experience as a married couple, one with ups and downs.
What really gets me is the specificity of their experiences. They live for a while in Ann Arbor – an Ann Arbor just a year or two after my own time there – and I felt as if I were walking around the streets with him. Zingerman’s – which opened around my sophomore year – had established itself as a landmark, and Kerrytown was around the corner. You could walk past the State Theater and David’s Books (where I once set a short story myself), and it all felt real and alive.
Things start to speed up later in the novel and I lose some of the sense of urgency from the beginning.
But, for a novel that captures that sense of being doubly in love – once with writing and once with someone who looks as if she answers all the questions you have about yourself – it would be hard to beat the ways this one takes me back.
February 7, 2018
Character driven vs plot driven. I think the former is much more difficult to achieve successfully. It's so easy for a character driven novel to wander aimlessly, to leave the reader wondering "what is the point?" So it is with Matrimony. The characters were all, at turns, likable and flawed. Maybe they were likable -- or at least relate-able -- because of their flaws. But it took until just past the halfway point for there to be something pivotal, some catalyst to swing the evolution of Julian and Mia and Carter, of Julian and Mia's relationship. Oddly, it wasn't the earthshaking event in Mia's life that shifted the tenor of the book for me but Julian's. The first half of the book dragged for me. Character driven novels never seem to be gripping page-turners for me, but the second half of this one went more quickly. Overall, not a bad read. Very real, very honest, but not terribly compelling.
May 30, 2022
This book follows a young couple and some of their close friends from their college days at an elite northeastern institution until midlife. Though there is some drama, the story is not plot-driven but rather character-driven. The characters are thick and believable, neither appearing as greater-than-life heroes nor as self-destructive basketcases. They struggle with the common struggles of family life, including death, infidelity, and career challenges.
The writing is rich yet accessible.
It does make me wonder - is this style of writing more honest? I do still long for the clear storyline of an obstacle overcome, a realization achieved. But maybe writing such as Henkin's will make us more human by understanding that life does not always conclude with a great victory, no matter how much we wish it were so.
The writing is rich yet accessible.
It does make me wonder - is this style of writing more honest? I do still long for the clear storyline of an obstacle overcome, a realization achieved. But maybe writing such as Henkin's will make us more human by understanding that life does not always conclude with a great victory, no matter how much we wish it were so.
May 1, 2009
Matrimony by Joshua Henkin is a novel about people, relationships, and life. The book follows the life of Julian Wainwright, his wife Mia, and a select few of their friends. We first meet the characters in college and follow along as they grow, mature, and face the new challenges of life that inevitably come their way. There’s betrayal, love, friendship, and just simply growing up. This book was different from what I normally read, though. It was not a nonfiction book about some historical event or person. There were no vampires, no supernatural forces doing battle, and no complex theories of magic and mysticism. Matrimony is quite simply about people. When I got the book and looked at the quaint and relatively unadorned cover, I gave an audible, “Hm.” I wondered if this sort of book would be the right fit for me.
Julian begins the story in college, studying to be a writer. He wants to write that great American novel and escape the corporate expectations of his rich family. He and his friend Carter are the stars of the class. The two of them develop a strong friendship and bond even after they meet the women of their dreams. Julian falls in love with a young woman named Mia. After graduating college, the two of them marry, propelled to push their life together forward faster when Mia’s mother comes down with breast cancer. Life takes over and people move apart-- Carter moves away to California and Julian and Mia are left to decide what to do with their future. Julian begins his novel and finds it a harder task than he imaged. Mia has to cope with the death of her mother while getting her graduate degree, her interest in psychiatry peaked after she goes to therapy herself. After this, it’s just life. Couples talk of kids, divorce, and what middle age means. Friendships are severed and people grow apart, but in the end the characters find that they are in the very same place as they have always been, only stronger for what they have been through.
Most of what we see comes through the eyes and experiences of Julian and he becomes an easy to relate to figure because of this. I found that because he was the most central character, he was the one I sympathized with the most. When bad things happened, I was on Julian’s side. When he was betrayed by Carter and Mia, I felt wounded in my stomach as if I were him.
One thing that I especially liked about the book is how it approached the nature of friendship and how we form and keep strong bonds with other people. For example, Julian and Carter were great friends, but not entirely loyal to one another. People are not perfect and even good people who sincerely care about each other are capable of doing things that are hurtful. Matrimony shows how people cope with betrayal and how friendships can survive very devastating obstacles. No matter how good or fun a friend Carter is, he is always kept back by the fact that he envies Julian. To Carter, everything Julian has is somehow better than what he has; Mia experiences this too through the eyes of her sister Olivia, who fails to see or find her own self worth because she is hung up on how much better Mia supposedly has always had it. Whether Carter or Olivia both have cause for feeling as they do, they do.
Henkin doesn’t make her characters perfect. I get annoyed very quickly by characters that are created just to be infallible and without any fault whatsoever. Julian is never quite sure enough of himself, Mia has a coldness about her that is hard to accept, and Carter is envious by nature and compensates for what he sees as imperfections in himself. Of course, there are moments of long contemplation, especially from Mia, that sort of drag on. In reality, I doubt many people are so introspective. It isn’t insincere or unrealistic, though, for Mia to be this way; I’ve spent enough time within the walls and atmosphere of a university to know that graduate students really ARE that long winded and pseudo-philosophical… sometimes exhaustibly so. Mia’s transcendent self-speeches were a bit haughty and pretentious like she is trying too hard and doesn’t even realize it, but that is just the way that some people are. I guess there was really no way for her not to be since her parents were strong liberal advocates. They probably had protest signs stored in their closet for the next opportunity to protest inequality or unfairness of some sort.
That brings me to another point. Even though Mia’s parents were liberal and modern minded, it was odd and almost hypocritical that her mother had to give her up her dreams and her career to be a mother. Wouldn’t that sort of thing be the very thing her parents would reject for being part of the norm? The traditional way of doing things that kept people down? You see? Matrimony doesn’t try to create perfect people and situations. People are just who they are.
By the end of the book, you will feel as if you ‘know’ the characters intimately. You’ve been through all of their trials and tribulations and survived them, too. It is really impressive the way that Henkin delivers such a character driven book that doesn’t need exaggerated drama or passion to keep it interesting. Henkin has an admirable ability to describe people’s thoughts and actions in a relatable way. He certainly has a way with words and description.
This is a great book. If you like the “slice of life” type of book, you’ll enjoy this one. And hey, even if you’re like me and have only just begun to explore this sort of story, you may still enjoy it. I certainly did.
Julian begins the story in college, studying to be a writer. He wants to write that great American novel and escape the corporate expectations of his rich family. He and his friend Carter are the stars of the class. The two of them develop a strong friendship and bond even after they meet the women of their dreams. Julian falls in love with a young woman named Mia. After graduating college, the two of them marry, propelled to push their life together forward faster when Mia’s mother comes down with breast cancer. Life takes over and people move apart-- Carter moves away to California and Julian and Mia are left to decide what to do with their future. Julian begins his novel and finds it a harder task than he imaged. Mia has to cope with the death of her mother while getting her graduate degree, her interest in psychiatry peaked after she goes to therapy herself. After this, it’s just life. Couples talk of kids, divorce, and what middle age means. Friendships are severed and people grow apart, but in the end the characters find that they are in the very same place as they have always been, only stronger for what they have been through.
Most of what we see comes through the eyes and experiences of Julian and he becomes an easy to relate to figure because of this. I found that because he was the most central character, he was the one I sympathized with the most. When bad things happened, I was on Julian’s side. When he was betrayed by Carter and Mia, I felt wounded in my stomach as if I were him.
One thing that I especially liked about the book is how it approached the nature of friendship and how we form and keep strong bonds with other people. For example, Julian and Carter were great friends, but not entirely loyal to one another. People are not perfect and even good people who sincerely care about each other are capable of doing things that are hurtful. Matrimony shows how people cope with betrayal and how friendships can survive very devastating obstacles. No matter how good or fun a friend Carter is, he is always kept back by the fact that he envies Julian. To Carter, everything Julian has is somehow better than what he has; Mia experiences this too through the eyes of her sister Olivia, who fails to see or find her own self worth because she is hung up on how much better Mia supposedly has always had it. Whether Carter or Olivia both have cause for feeling as they do, they do.
Henkin doesn’t make her characters perfect. I get annoyed very quickly by characters that are created just to be infallible and without any fault whatsoever. Julian is never quite sure enough of himself, Mia has a coldness about her that is hard to accept, and Carter is envious by nature and compensates for what he sees as imperfections in himself. Of course, there are moments of long contemplation, especially from Mia, that sort of drag on. In reality, I doubt many people are so introspective. It isn’t insincere or unrealistic, though, for Mia to be this way; I’ve spent enough time within the walls and atmosphere of a university to know that graduate students really ARE that long winded and pseudo-philosophical… sometimes exhaustibly so. Mia’s transcendent self-speeches were a bit haughty and pretentious like she is trying too hard and doesn’t even realize it, but that is just the way that some people are. I guess there was really no way for her not to be since her parents were strong liberal advocates. They probably had protest signs stored in their closet for the next opportunity to protest inequality or unfairness of some sort.
That brings me to another point. Even though Mia’s parents were liberal and modern minded, it was odd and almost hypocritical that her mother had to give her up her dreams and her career to be a mother. Wouldn’t that sort of thing be the very thing her parents would reject for being part of the norm? The traditional way of doing things that kept people down? You see? Matrimony doesn’t try to create perfect people and situations. People are just who they are.
By the end of the book, you will feel as if you ‘know’ the characters intimately. You’ve been through all of their trials and tribulations and survived them, too. It is really impressive the way that Henkin delivers such a character driven book that doesn’t need exaggerated drama or passion to keep it interesting. Henkin has an admirable ability to describe people’s thoughts and actions in a relatable way. He certainly has a way with words and description.
This is a great book. If you like the “slice of life” type of book, you’ll enjoy this one. And hey, even if you’re like me and have only just begun to explore this sort of story, you may still enjoy it. I certainly did.
October 17, 2019
I really liked this book. Despite the fact that the plot is "ordinary", Henkin's fluid prose, detailed characterizations and honest portrayal of relationships make this book interesting from the get-go. Add on to it that it so accurately depicts the experience of a struggling/aspiring novelist, and I was sold. It's a quiet, wonderful gem of a book. I read it in about two sittings.
August 29, 2018
Ugh. Over hyped. Dull. Dispassionate. I just couldn’t care about the characters, mostly because they didn’t seem to care about anything, either. I really wanted to like this book. Two stars because I finished it. Barely.
September 30, 2018
Once I got into this, it grabbed me and didn’t let go. Likable, believable characters making their way through life. The beginning was the best, the time Julian and Mia were in college, but I admire how Henkin transported the reader from one stage of life to another.
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