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Send My Roots Rain: A Companion on the Grief Journey
Langley offers comfort and encouragement to those struggling with recent loss or grief, helping them find language for complex emotions, and open their hearts through poetry. Send My Roots Rain is a companion full of stories—sometimes wry and funny, always observant and accepting—for letting grief unfold and teach us. Langley invites a keen awareness that the passage through grief is the navigation of a narrow strait, requiring patience, skill, and worthy companions. These poems can be those companions on the journey. Langley has carefully selected 60 poems and arranged them in a meaningful arc, beginning with the shock of early grief, leading through a sensitive exploration of a new inner space. She introduces each section, encouraging the ongoing embrace of the healing power of poems, writing, and entry into the grieving process. Each poem is followed by a brief meditation and quotation, with questions for contemplation, journaling, or group discussion.
176 pages, Paperback
Published April 9, 2019
About the author
Kim Langley
5 books65 followersKim Langley: The Unvarnished Truth
A package arrived from California (a mythical land to a girl from Pittsburgh) when I turned eight. Aunt Viola Buehler had mailed Louis Untermeyer’s The Golden Treasury of Poetry. When not being told to get off the couch and get my nose OUT of that book, I was reading the good stuff over and over, everything from nonsense verses, to ballads, and of course The Highwayman. From The Highwayman I learned that the moon could be “a ghostly galleon, tossed upon cloudy seas”. The rest was history.
Fast forward 30 plus years, and I am leading poetry circles for mindful conversation. Over and over people entered with their shoulders hunched up around their ears, cowering and fearful that they wouldn’t get it. “I don’t understand poetry. I just came because my friend brought me.” Then 2 hours later they exit wheedling the date of the next gathering from me and asking “When can we do this again!?”
Because I am not entirely clueless, my heart could not help but notice the joy of participants integrating parts of the self, and finding words for thoughts and feeling that they had been unable to express.
Finding myself at a conference on using poetry in ministry, I was sitting with strangers around the lunch table when someone asked-- “What brings you here?” I rattled on about poetry circles and the alchemy that happens there, and she popped the question: “Do you have any poems about grief?” Do I have any poems about grief! One of the lame jokes among poets is that every poem ever written could be lumped under five themes, and one of those is grief. So yes. She turned out to be a representative of Paraclete Press.
That’s when Send My Roots Rain was born.
Kim lives in Ohio with her family of teachers, a librarian and business owner, a software engineer.
When not leading poetry circles through www.WordSPA.net, or chained to the laptop, she’s self employed as a speaker and coach at www.KimLangley.net.
She enjoys a good workout in her huge flower garden, and sneaking treats to Tucker, the doggie who wooed and won her heart.
A package arrived from California (a mythical land to a girl from Pittsburgh) when I turned eight. Aunt Viola Buehler had mailed Louis Untermeyer’s The Golden Treasury of Poetry. When not being told to get off the couch and get my nose OUT of that book, I was reading the good stuff over and over, everything from nonsense verses, to ballads, and of course The Highwayman. From The Highwayman I learned that the moon could be “a ghostly galleon, tossed upon cloudy seas”. The rest was history.
Fast forward 30 plus years, and I am leading poetry circles for mindful conversation. Over and over people entered with their shoulders hunched up around their ears, cowering and fearful that they wouldn’t get it. “I don’t understand poetry. I just came because my friend brought me.” Then 2 hours later they exit wheedling the date of the next gathering from me and asking “When can we do this again!?”
Because I am not entirely clueless, my heart could not help but notice the joy of participants integrating parts of the self, and finding words for thoughts and feeling that they had been unable to express.
Finding myself at a conference on using poetry in ministry, I was sitting with strangers around the lunch table when someone asked-- “What brings you here?” I rattled on about poetry circles and the alchemy that happens there, and she popped the question: “Do you have any poems about grief?” Do I have any poems about grief! One of the lame jokes among poets is that every poem ever written could be lumped under five themes, and one of those is grief. So yes. She turned out to be a representative of Paraclete Press.
That’s when Send My Roots Rain was born.
Kim lives in Ohio with her family of teachers, a librarian and business owner, a software engineer.
When not leading poetry circles through www.WordSPA.net, or chained to the laptop, she’s self employed as a speaker and coach at www.KimLangley.net.
She enjoys a good workout in her huge flower garden, and sneaking treats to Tucker, the doggie who wooed and won her heart.
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
April 22, 2019
Years ago in a time of grief, someone dear to me brought a basket filled with things she hoped might help. It included flowers from her garden, homemade muffins, and tea. I didn’t believe I’d ever want to feel better. But I was soothed by the memory of her hands holding it out at my doorstep. The round bowl of that sturdy basket, which I kept in my kitchen for a long time, seemed to gather and hold something in me.
Kim Langley’s extraordinary book, "Send My Roots Rain," is the most generous basket imaginable. It is woven together with poems chosen to resonate with and hold a grieving reader. It is filled with personal stories, quotes, mindful activities, reflections, and Kim’s gentle wisdom. There are no “shoulds” here, only offerings held out by truly caring hands.
February 9, 2019
Langley has gathered together the moving words of others and her own gentle guidance to offer readers a way to give voice to the journey of grief. Appropriate for both the bereaved and those who seek to give them solace, Give My Roots Rain is unlike any other book about loss and healing I have ever seen.
February 6, 2019
Kim Langley has crafted a heartfelt and deeply moving work, focusing on the journey of grief. This is a powerful, empathetic, and ultimately actionable book that is sure to be on the shelves of grief counselors and compassionate therapists for years to come. Each section of the book ends with "Mindful Activities," and there is a separate chapter at the end with "Tips for Facilitators."
Highly recommended.
Highly recommended.
February 7, 2019
This book contains a wonderful collection of poems to comfort, encourage, validate and support us through all aspects of the grief journey. The accompanying reflections and quotes help us go deeper, and I like the additional activities. As a therapist who works with people grappling with grief in many forms, this book is a resource I know I will turn to again and again.
April 16, 2019
Knowing that grief can't be "fixed," Send My Roots Rain offers companionship instead. While grief is individual and lonely, Send My Roots Rain: A Companion on the Grief Journey gently gives voice to the range of emotions that whirlwind around it. Approaching this tender topic by way of poetry, reflections, quotes and mindful activities, the reader experiences different directions from which comfort may come. Heartfelt and wise, this book provides an accessible resource for a universal journey.
February 18, 2019
Send My Roots Rain
Langley takes on the difficult topic of grief with a warm and self deprecating tone. She invites the reader in with encouragement and passes no judgement on each individual’s grief journey. Langley makes poetry an accessible pathway through grief. The poems and quotes throughout the book give voice to all different types of grief. Grief is rough unchartered waters for many and Langley successfully stands at the helm and brings the reader safely to the other shore.
Joyce Geib
Langley takes on the difficult topic of grief with a warm and self deprecating tone. She invites the reader in with encouragement and passes no judgement on each individual’s grief journey. Langley makes poetry an accessible pathway through grief. The poems and quotes throughout the book give voice to all different types of grief. Grief is rough unchartered waters for many and Langley successfully stands at the helm and brings the reader safely to the other shore.
Joyce Geib
Want to Read
February 19, 2019This is not a book about poetry. It is a book about grieving. Yet it also contains poems, poems that may resonate with your own experience.
I have always known that some poetry is made for those of us who are grieving , because grief has its own language and is often the only way to be heard.
If you are grieving or know someone who is, do give yourself the gift of being received in this gentle and surprisingly joyful book.
I have always known that some poetry is made for those of us who are grieving , because grief has its own language and is often the only way to be heard.
If you are grieving or know someone who is, do give yourself the gift of being received in this gentle and surprisingly joyful book.
April 29, 2019
What do you give to a friend or loved one who is grieving any kind of loss? Look no further. As an ordained minister for 36 years, I have walked with numerous people through the grief journey and, of course, have experienced my own losses of various types. Kim has compiled poetry from a wide variety of writers and added her own commentary and questions. These aren't trite or sentimental; these are poems that dive deep, provoking reflection and emotion. Quotes add more fodder for journaling or for use in grief support groups. Several suggestions under the category "mindful activities" give practical guidance about what "the next right thing" might be for different individuals. I loved Kim's solid theology (you won't find "everything happens for a reason" here), her advice on what to say to those who are grieving, and plenty of permission for those who are grieving to let go of perfectionism and rest, rest, rest. Highly-recommended.
April 9, 2019
Send My Roots Rain: A Companion on the Grief Journey, really does feel like a comforting presence accompanying you through the one of the most difficulty journeys life has to offer: the death of a loved one. You do not need to love poetry to find this book useful; indeed, you do not even need to know anything about poetry. This is not a college literature seminar; it is a down-to-earth guide to being comforted by the experiences of others--as expressed through poetry.
One of the things I liked best about Langley's approach to this book was her up-front advice to "take what is useful to you and leave the rest," which is an excellent maxim that the recovery community has been using for years. And while this book dwells in the realm of the spiritual, I was deeply appreciative of the author's inclusive language that encompasses all spiritual and religious traditions. Whether you are a devout believer or the most skeptical agnostic, I believe you can utilize this book comfortably, as I have; I have been from one end of that religious spectrum to the other, and I was grateful for a grief reader that didn't make assumptions about my religious tradition or spiritual concerns.
I have often wanted to do something special for friends and family at the one year milestone of a loved one's death (I already have a go-to gift I give at the time of the death), and Send My Roots Rain is just the special thing I have been looking for. With its poetry and discussion questions, it is perfect for reading and journaling alone or using in a support group, both things I wasn't able to handle during my first year of grief. My grief-brain couldn't possibly have handled any more than the one little page per day in my grief devotional after the sudden and unexplained death of my brother at the age of 43. Nor could my mind have processed any more after the horrific suicide of my 22 year old nephew just a few years later. But after a year in mourning, my shock had mostly worn off and I was able to begin to process my feelings more. This is the point at which I think this book will be enormously helpful to grievers, and it will now be my go-to gift to commemorate the one year milestone after a loved one's death. What better way to celebrate a person's life than with the gift of hope and acceptance that this book offers?
One of the things I liked best about Langley's approach to this book was her up-front advice to "take what is useful to you and leave the rest," which is an excellent maxim that the recovery community has been using for years. And while this book dwells in the realm of the spiritual, I was deeply appreciative of the author's inclusive language that encompasses all spiritual and religious traditions. Whether you are a devout believer or the most skeptical agnostic, I believe you can utilize this book comfortably, as I have; I have been from one end of that religious spectrum to the other, and I was grateful for a grief reader that didn't make assumptions about my religious tradition or spiritual concerns.
I have often wanted to do something special for friends and family at the one year milestone of a loved one's death (I already have a go-to gift I give at the time of the death), and Send My Roots Rain is just the special thing I have been looking for. With its poetry and discussion questions, it is perfect for reading and journaling alone or using in a support group, both things I wasn't able to handle during my first year of grief. My grief-brain couldn't possibly have handled any more than the one little page per day in my grief devotional after the sudden and unexplained death of my brother at the age of 43. Nor could my mind have processed any more after the horrific suicide of my 22 year old nephew just a few years later. But after a year in mourning, my shock had mostly worn off and I was able to begin to process my feelings more. This is the point at which I think this book will be enormously helpful to grievers, and it will now be my go-to gift to commemorate the one year milestone after a loved one's death. What better way to celebrate a person's life than with the gift of hope and acceptance that this book offers?
April 17, 2019
Kim Langley has expertly curated a collection of poems to soothe the soul, to foster connection, and to ground one’s self in the deeper meaning within the inevitable broken and wounded pieces of life. All throughout this book I found resonance, newness of perspective, and familiar old wisdom inviting me to reflect and slow down with my own experiences as well as those of my loved ones. If you are a lover of poetry, this book is for you. If you are unfamiliar with or intimidated by poetry, this book is for you. Not only has Ms. Langley gathered a treasury of poems on grief and loss, she offers her own reflection, poses questions to guide your further contemplation, and brings it home with an extra and apt quotation for each and every poem. These additional pieces really do make it feel like the book is a companion and guided meditation on grief and life- not just a compilation of poetry on loss.
As a chaplain and spiritual director myself, this book will soon become a go-to tool in my ministry toolkit. Especially if you’ve ever wanted to know how to use poetry in your ministry, counseling, or therapeutic setting of any kind but weren’t quite sure how to do so, this book is for you. Ms. Langley also includes a variety of mindful activities to use with the poems.
I honestly can’t recommend this book enough. Whether you or some you love or work with is grieving- which if we’re honest includes everyone!- this book is worth every penny.
As a chaplain and spiritual director myself, this book will soon become a go-to tool in my ministry toolkit. Especially if you’ve ever wanted to know how to use poetry in your ministry, counseling, or therapeutic setting of any kind but weren’t quite sure how to do so, this book is for you. Ms. Langley also includes a variety of mindful activities to use with the poems.
I honestly can’t recommend this book enough. Whether you or some you love or work with is grieving- which if we’re honest includes everyone!- this book is worth every penny.
April 16, 2020
Send My Roots Rain, A Companion on the Grief Journey, by Kim Langley, brings comfort and strength in ways that can be felt deeply in the grief stricken heart. This author has found a unique and engaging way to share so many helpful ideas to help with navigation along the often complicated grief journey. She includes just the right number of experiences from personal grief to validate so many realities about it in very inspiring ways. In each section of the book, you receive the gifts of very carefully chosen thought prompting poems. But there is so much more in this book than great poetry. That’s what makes it so exceptional. There are reflections included with each poem that provide opportunities to understand specific points about a lot of different losses, not just death. Then, at the end of each section, a special quote is included as a take away gift, as if your companion is a special friend offering wisdom until you meet again. The mindful activities help with very specific ideas to jump start and encourage you to begin taking productive steps to help you along the way. These practice activities are valuable to keep as resources to use immediately or to be kept for use later. I love that the book can be read from start to finish or re-opened anytime for a refreshing dose of wisdom or comfort as quick a rescue from grief when that unwelcome and unexpected visitor arrives, often without an invitation!
August 5, 2024
This banquet of a book must be digested in small servings to allow time after reading to ponder. Each poem proceeds a reflection and a related quotation from a famous poet or writer. All of them meaty, thought provoking and often requiring a second or third rereading to hear the full meaning.
The book cover states, "A Companion on the Grief Journey" so aptly named. The poems not only provide insight, emotional comfort, a gutting cut to the source of my grief and pain, spiritual considerations, and metaphors for things too difficult to put into words.
The chapters follow the trajectory of the grief journey.
Chapter One: Facing Mortality, Diagnosis, Anticipatory Grief, The Long Goodbye, Caregiving
Chapter Two: Funeral - Just Before and After, Deaths of Family, Partner, Spouse
Chapter Three: Family deaths, Untimely death, Suicide, Death of a Child, Coping with the Unbearable
Chapter Four: Comforts & Memories, We the Living, Going On, Resilience
At times this material was difficult to read and feel, not unlike fertilizer, too heavily applied, that burns the grass, yet eventually nourishes and provides growth. If you are serious about coping with your grief and wish to learn from it in order to begin building your "new life" after the loss, this book is a companion on that journey of examination and adjustment.
Highly, highly recommended, I shall give this book to many grievers in the future.
The book cover states, "A Companion on the Grief Journey" so aptly named. The poems not only provide insight, emotional comfort, a gutting cut to the source of my grief and pain, spiritual considerations, and metaphors for things too difficult to put into words.
The chapters follow the trajectory of the grief journey.
Chapter One: Facing Mortality, Diagnosis, Anticipatory Grief, The Long Goodbye, Caregiving
Chapter Two: Funeral - Just Before and After, Deaths of Family, Partner, Spouse
Chapter Three: Family deaths, Untimely death, Suicide, Death of a Child, Coping with the Unbearable
Chapter Four: Comforts & Memories, We the Living, Going On, Resilience
At times this material was difficult to read and feel, not unlike fertilizer, too heavily applied, that burns the grass, yet eventually nourishes and provides growth. If you are serious about coping with your grief and wish to learn from it in order to begin building your "new life" after the loss, this book is a companion on that journey of examination and adjustment.
Highly, highly recommended, I shall give this book to many grievers in the future.
June 10, 2019
As host of Death Cafe New York City, I am party to hundreds of stories about the emotional and physical pain of grief. Anticipatory, delayed or prolonged ...chronic and cumulative ...disenfranchised and masked. One minute an individual is hit by a riptide; at other times, they are knocked off balance. Langley's compendium of 60 poems, reflections and quotes so perfectly support this range of responses and bring human suffering back into balance -- much like essential oils from biblical times known to soothe and calm the mind. In one of the final chapters, Tips for Facilitators, the secret of the book's success is ultimately revealed. Langley writes that if a facilitator simply says: "May I read some words that they have found meaningful and that might help....95 percent of grievers say yes." Count me in that 95% that say yes, we have found pure solace reading Send My Roots Rain.
March 1, 2019
My grandfather's death is my earliest memory at age three. I know I was three because years later I asked my mom, "How old was I when Grandpa Thuresson died?" She said, "Three." I don't remember my Grandpa Thuresson. I only remember death. The sunlight streamed through the venetian blinds laying stripes across my mom and dad. My mom was sobbing. I had never seen her cry before. My dad was holding her, wordless. Invisible to them, I crept back to my bedroom and pulled the covers over my head.
Send My Roots Rain . . . A Companion on the Grief Journey by Kim Langley will not only give you words to see you through your loss but will comfort you with many hugs and tugs of recognition to ease your sorrow. I recommend this book.
Send My Roots Rain . . . A Companion on the Grief Journey by Kim Langley will not only give you words to see you through your loss but will comfort you with many hugs and tugs of recognition to ease your sorrow. I recommend this book.
March 14, 2022
Below this review box is a little box to check marked "Hide entire review because of spoilers." I like dark humor so this appeals to me as I write a review of Kim Langley's inspirational "Send My Roots Rain"...spoiler alert: its about coping with the loss of a loved one. The book is filled with poems carefully curated by Langley that bring us to the edge of facing grief head-on while giving us the room to back up a bit and decide how much grief we are ready to process. She offers reflections, inspiration quotes, and small actions to help move one forward. This book became my lifeline after the loss of my father, and I've gifted it many times to family and friends also coping with grief. Whether or not you like or "get" poetry won't lessen the impact of this book on your life.
March 3, 2019
Honestly, I was shocked that I loved this book so much. Poetry is often something I read because I "should" like it, not because I do like it. Sometimes poetry is too abstract and the meanings too difficult for me to discern in my "to-do list" style of life.
But, the poetry resonated with me. It affirmed my recent experience. I often say I "lost my mother" but I didn't lose her. She is present in new and different ways.
"Give My Roots Rain" is a reminder of the largeness of life, the complexity of our feelings and the unseen connections holding us together.
But, the poetry resonated with me. It affirmed my recent experience. I often say I "lost my mother" but I didn't lose her. She is present in new and different ways.
"Give My Roots Rain" is a reminder of the largeness of life, the complexity of our feelings and the unseen connections holding us together.
March 11, 2019
Kim’s book is a practical resource for anyone on the grief journey, or offering care and support to someone on the journey. I don’t often turn to poetry in my reading, but I found the juxtaposition of poems with practical suggestions for reflection and finding ways forward to be enlightening and nurturing. I’m bringing this to my Grief Support Group – I am sure we will all benefit from it. The librarian in me loves the helpful index too.
March 17, 2019
Kim Langley has woven carefully chosen poems, thoughtful questions, and gentle reflections together to create a book that is both artful and practical. Her compassion, wisdom, and ultimate hopefulness shine through the pages of this book. I highly recommend it for anyone who is dealing with or working with people facing loss. A gem of a book!
August 23, 2019
Kim...I just want to say that I'm still reading the book but I love the poem you referenced named "The Cure." It makes so much sense to me and is helping me understand more about my feelings around the loss of my parents and my beloved dog who truly was my daughter. Ariel. Cant wait to keep reading! Lori Peters-McCracken
May 1, 2019
Great book-Exploring grief through poetry, reflections, and quotes with genuine life experience and humor.
March 21, 2021
It is good for those grieving.
January 1, 2024
If you want to give anyone who is grieving any kind of loss, this is the one to give. Beautiful, poignant poetry that matches various types of losses but who anyone might relate to.
June 8, 2021
This book is a MUST HAVE. I truly recommend this book for ANYONE who's traversing the dying process with their family or friends. I'm currently working through a lot of grief as my loved one is in his final days. I do not subscribe to any religion and when I'm searching for solace, I find overtly religious writings to be supremely unhelpful, if not irritating. This book would be a fantastic gift or read, because it gives you a short poem to read, then a paragraph or two discussing how the poem encapsulates certain moments. Finding This book is itself a silver lining, each short excerpt feels like an understanding friend's gentle hug. Do yourself and favor and keep this little book handy, as it's a spark of light in the darkest of nights, regardless of creed, faith or lack thereof, as well.
February 27, 2019
This book embraces you like a cherished comforter. It quenches your thirst after the drought of loss. It surrounds your broken heart and lifts your laden soul to be able to take the next step toward healing and recovery. This book is the necessary tool to lead you down the winding path of grief and then to be able to once again find joy.
I will wear the pages thin, referring to this book over and over again.
I will wear the pages thin, referring to this book over and over again.
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews