When His Secret Sin Breaks Your Heart: Letters To Hurting Wives

by Kathy Gallagher

One afternoon, Kathy Gallagher discovered why her husband was so emotionally distant, angry and he was addicted to pornography and adulterous sexual encounters.
Only those who have experienced this kind of betrayal can comprehend the level of pain Kathy experienced in that moment. But in the years that followed, she experienced a God who could use the greatest pain and deepest suffering imaginable to draw her into His unfathomable depths of love, forgiveness and intimacy.
In the 20th Anniversary Edition of When His Secret Sin Breaks Your Heart, the devastated wife will quickly find that Kathy sympathizes with her emotional turmoil and offers solid counsel on a wide range of issues. But most importantly, she will be directed to the only true source of hope and comfort in the midst of unspeakable Jesus .
 

Genres: Marriage, Christian, Sexuality, Relationships, Nonfiction

208 pages, Paperback

First published June 1, 2003

Reviews

[Kristi]

I give this four stars because overall I think this book is worth keeping. There are one or two things I definitely disagree with the author about. For instance the author mentions atleast twice the old lie of 'if he gets it at home he won't go looking for it' which is a very ignorant statement and almost puts the blame on a wife. The second main problem I had was she seems to grade pornography in levels (looking shouldn't be treated like hooking up with prostitutes and so on). In God's eyes and in the wife's eyes it's all the same, sorry Kathy! A few other ones but those are the two main issues.
This author touches alot of tender and hard issues so I appreciated that. Ex: homesexuality, beastality, oral sex, etc. It's written as letters to wives but she adresses a topic in each letter. I especially thought the chapters on fear, thoughts, and focusing on God very helpful.
While I may not recommend this book when counseling, unless I'd premarked the areas I felt were more damaging then helpful, I would probably use the chapters on fear and such. This is not the best book out there on this topic but this lady was definitely more then qualified to write this!

[Zeb]

Great read with practical advice for both those in ministry helping people with marital issues and for those who are currently walking through fires themselves.

[Savannah]

Truly biblical view of marriage and betrayal. The letters at the end are especially nourishing as they shine light on godly handling of seriously painful, confusing, and real situations.

[Hannah Foss]

Would’ve given it 0 stars but that seems harsh

[Angela]

So this was an ok book. I say ok because she always talked about a woman guiding her husband. No no no that is a BIG mistake. Woman are not to lead men at all. She ought to take EVERYTHING to God and let God change her husbands heart. When a woman guides or teaches her husband she is robbing him of his God-given right of being the spiritual leader.
The only other thing I disagree with is suggesting divorce, there is no grounds ever for divorce. If there is physical abuse or verbal abuse that cannot be handled, separate and seek God.
Anyone who divorces and has another relationship is an Adulterer. Woman if your husband gives you a certificate of divorce you are to remain single until your husband comes back or he dies.
Look it up for yourself it is all in the Bible.

[Victoria (hotcocoaandbooks)]

Kathy Gallagher's story was really a remarkable one. I truly enjoyed reading through this book. It was interesting to read how different accounts different women have gone through. I love how a lot of what her responses were had all pointed to following Christ and to live in according to God's will, even though it seems most of these women wanted to have everyone on their side for what was done against their marriage through their husband's sexual addictions. I think a lot of the times we want to point the finger at other people when really we have to also evaluate our own lives too.