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Parenting Forward: How to Raise Children with Justice, Mercy, and Kindness
How do we build a better world? One key way, says Cindy Wang Brandt, is by learning to raise our children with justice, mercy, and kindness. In Parenting Forward Brandt equips Christian parents to model a way of following Jesus that has an outward focus, putting priority on loving others, avoiding judgment, and helping those in need. She shows how parents must work on dismantling their own racial, cultural, gender, economic, and religious biases in order to avoid passing them on to their children. “By becoming aware of the complex ways we participate in systems of inequality or hierarchy,” she says, “we begin to resist systemic injustice ourselves, empower our children, and change our communities.”
182 pages, Paperback
Published June 26, 2019
89 people are currently reading
1431 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 68 reviews
October 16, 2020
I feel like the author is a much better podcaster than writer (no offense meant). The quality of her podcast content is rich with truth, with food for thought and novel ideas for parenting that isn't traditional in the Christian realm. All of which isn't something that is easily conveyed in the written word. It just seems to come out better in a podcast
The content here is a good starting point for parents just delving into equality, social justice, rethinking fundamentalist values, raising ethical and moral humans.
Definitely listen to her podcast called Parenting Forward!
The content here is a good starting point for parents just delving into equality, social justice, rethinking fundamentalist values, raising ethical and moral humans.
Definitely listen to her podcast called Parenting Forward!
August 7, 2019
The white evangelical church has done a poor job of giving voice to the marginalized. Too often, we value obedience to authority over justice, mercy, and kindness. How do we raise our children as followers of Christ who love the oppressed like Christ did?
I read Parenting Forward with hopes that it would draw lines between a biblical Christian faith and the very real justice issues in our society. Unfortunately, this book’s message was largely indistinguishable from any secular liberal’s treatise on parenting. That is to say, I agree with the author on many points: we should raise our kids to value racial justice, female empowerment, and creativity. There are many other points, especially regarding gender identity and sexual ethics, that I disagree with her on. I would have been open to faithful, scriptural arguments for her positions, but the author didn’t make them. Instead, she appealed largely to fellow bloggers, often secular ones, or others who have emerged with scars from the fundamentalist tradition.
In fact, Brandt’s fundamentalist upbringing, faith deconstruction, and progressive reaction all feel very fresh. Many of the values, including autonomy for children, equality between parents and children, and a description of discipline as “punishment,” can be better explained as reactions to fundamentalism than as readings of the Bible as a whole.
The book is very well-written, and Rachel Held Evans is right to point out how well-read Brandt is. Given her obvious intellect and communication skill, I wish she’d done more to grapple with Biblical texts that might be seen to contradict her positions, and to more thoroughly ground her positions in Biblical teaching. Lacking that, this book reads more like a progressive parenting manual than a call for Biblical justice and mercy in parenting.
I read Parenting Forward with hopes that it would draw lines between a biblical Christian faith and the very real justice issues in our society. Unfortunately, this book’s message was largely indistinguishable from any secular liberal’s treatise on parenting. That is to say, I agree with the author on many points: we should raise our kids to value racial justice, female empowerment, and creativity. There are many other points, especially regarding gender identity and sexual ethics, that I disagree with her on. I would have been open to faithful, scriptural arguments for her positions, but the author didn’t make them. Instead, she appealed largely to fellow bloggers, often secular ones, or others who have emerged with scars from the fundamentalist tradition.
In fact, Brandt’s fundamentalist upbringing, faith deconstruction, and progressive reaction all feel very fresh. Many of the values, including autonomy for children, equality between parents and children, and a description of discipline as “punishment,” can be better explained as reactions to fundamentalism than as readings of the Bible as a whole.
The book is very well-written, and Rachel Held Evans is right to point out how well-read Brandt is. Given her obvious intellect and communication skill, I wish she’d done more to grapple with Biblical texts that might be seen to contradict her positions, and to more thoroughly ground her positions in Biblical teaching. Lacking that, this book reads more like a progressive parenting manual than a call for Biblical justice and mercy in parenting.
July 19, 2019
Warning: if you are an evangelical, conservative Christian, this book will be a difficult read theologically and culturally for you. If you are a deconstructing Christian, a progressive/liberal Christian, or identify with the writings of Rachel Held Evans/Glennon Doyle/Rob Bell this book will be right up your alley.
I was introduced to Cindy’s blog and Facebook group a while back and was so happy to finally read her book, Parenting Forward. In the book she shared her experiences with evangelical Christianity, talks about the harm it has done in the name of Jesus, and gives a path forward for both adults and their children. She tackles issues like the worth of children, gender equality, racism, and LGBTQ+ equality. I do wish she’d delved more into scriptural support for these issues (particularly LGBTQ+ inclusion) because many evangelicals haven’t read the Biblical “clobber passages” with equality in mind.
Overall, a short read that packs a punch and draws readers toward hope and change.
I was introduced to Cindy’s blog and Facebook group a while back and was so happy to finally read her book, Parenting Forward. In the book she shared her experiences with evangelical Christianity, talks about the harm it has done in the name of Jesus, and gives a path forward for both adults and their children. She tackles issues like the worth of children, gender equality, racism, and LGBTQ+ equality. I do wish she’d delved more into scriptural support for these issues (particularly LGBTQ+ inclusion) because many evangelicals haven’t read the Biblical “clobber passages” with equality in mind.
Overall, a short read that packs a punch and draws readers toward hope and change.
June 1, 2019
A relief. A grace. A reassuring voice as I try to parent differently than the fear-based control methods that so shaped my own childhood. If you know what you don't want in parenting, but struggle at times to imagine what you do, Cindy's book is for you. Personal example: Not wanting to yell or shame, I'm afraid I often default to overexplaining or just talking at my kids, which can feel like just a less aggressive way to do the same mythical moral "download" into their brains. Cindy offers an alternative that actually invites an exchange: the underutilized power phrase, "What do you think?"
July 29, 2019
I am not a parent, but I wanted to read Cindy's book because I heard her speak at The Evolving Faith Conference in 2018 and I love her perspective on raising children and interacting with children.
If you appreciate the perspectives of Rachel Held Evans, Sarah Bessey, Jen Hatmaker, etc. this is another great book for you to read.
If you appreciate the perspectives of Rachel Held Evans, Sarah Bessey, Jen Hatmaker, etc. this is another great book for you to read.
March 24, 2019
YES! As so many others have said, this book is such a centering, courage-giving companion for not only parents, but all those who are seeking to live healthy lives and pass on life-giving perspectives to the next generation. I love the emphasis Cindy puts on children's agency. Thank you so much, Cindy, for this liberating and empowering book.
August 19, 2019
This was a light read, skimming over many important topics. It read a lot like the cliff notes of much larger deeper issues. I was expecting a few more parenting takeaways therefore the substance of it was lacking for my taste. But overall it was good to read something written more specifically for those who have experienced a faith shift and are looking for a way forward with parenting.
March 4, 2019
As stated on her blog Cindy Wang Brandt describes herself as a progressive Christian who had been a conservative evangelical. As such, her book is part parenting advice and part her story of how she is shedding her conservative upbringing and beliefs. The parenting part is interesting and has good ideas, but many readers will need to brace themselves for Brandt's harsh word concerning beliefs they hold dear. A good book to read and ponder; use what you can and leave the rest.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received a review copy of this book. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received a review copy of this book. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.
December 29, 2019
I have been in Cindy’s Facebook group, Raising Children UnFundamentalist for 3 years now and the interactions and intentions she has provoked there are evident in this book. Recommend to all parents but especially to those who come from repressed fundamentalist backgrounds.
September 23, 2019
Very glad I read this book. Lots of wisdom here.
September 9, 2020
This is an exceptional book.
"Parenting Forward" is the first Christian parenting book I've read (and I've read a lot) that takes children seriously as their own human beings with rights to their bodies, minds, and souls. It also is as much about adults healing their own child-selves as it is about raising children, reminding me a bit of Janet Pais' book "Suffer the Children" in that regard.
Unlike conservative Christian parenting "experts," Brandt is not interested in creating mini-me's. This isn't a book about making sure your children are indoctrinated by progressive beliefs. Yes, Brandt is unabashedly progressive, but this book is about discovering who your child is and walking hand in hand with that child towards God. This isn't an authoritarian system; rather, it is, as Brandt puts it, an authoritative system. That is, at its core, Brandt believes adults can only earn children's respect; they cannot coerce it. This is a crucial difference from conservative Christian parenting and I think it is entirely true. At its core, authoritarian parenting requires the subjugation and erasure of children's wills. Brandt's alternative vision sees children's wills as necessary and healthy... and worthy of flourishing.
This isn't a Pollyannic vision, however. Brandt fully understands the challenges children face today and argues that the best way to help children in those battles is to equip them to face them head on. Brandt believes children are capable of rising to meet the struggle for justice that is alive and well today. She sees children and adults working together for a brighter, better future. That's a vision I can get behind.
"Parenting Forward" is the first Christian parenting book I've read (and I've read a lot) that takes children seriously as their own human beings with rights to their bodies, minds, and souls. It also is as much about adults healing their own child-selves as it is about raising children, reminding me a bit of Janet Pais' book "Suffer the Children" in that regard.
Unlike conservative Christian parenting "experts," Brandt is not interested in creating mini-me's. This isn't a book about making sure your children are indoctrinated by progressive beliefs. Yes, Brandt is unabashedly progressive, but this book is about discovering who your child is and walking hand in hand with that child towards God. This isn't an authoritarian system; rather, it is, as Brandt puts it, an authoritative system. That is, at its core, Brandt believes adults can only earn children's respect; they cannot coerce it. This is a crucial difference from conservative Christian parenting and I think it is entirely true. At its core, authoritarian parenting requires the subjugation and erasure of children's wills. Brandt's alternative vision sees children's wills as necessary and healthy... and worthy of flourishing.
This isn't a Pollyannic vision, however. Brandt fully understands the challenges children face today and argues that the best way to help children in those battles is to equip them to face them head on. Brandt believes children are capable of rising to meet the struggle for justice that is alive and well today. She sees children and adults working together for a brighter, better future. That's a vision I can get behind.
October 18, 2023
My husband and I read this book together. We have been on a long-term deconstruction journey and have very young children. We absolutely loved that this book was about how to raise anti-racist, queer-affirming, non-sexist children since those are some the core issues we are deconstructing. This book was about guiding children with helpful questions, talking deeply about situations and experiences in their lives.
Cindy challenged the authoritarian model of parenting by affirming the agency of children in many ways including food and clothing choices. She talked about nurturing emotions including allowing girls to express anger, and boys to express their feelings more frequently in general. It provided ideas for talking to children about sexuality that challenged old Evangelical norms of purity culture.
There is a chapter about healthy spirituality, encouraging conversation, investigation and exploration, which was very illuminating especially since we are in the deconstruction sphere. The chapter about economic and environmental justice was challenging for both of us in a good way. We hadn’t thought enough about consumerism and “ethical consumption” before reading Cindy’s thoughts. By simply bringing our attention to these concerns, we feel better equipped to make healthier decisions about the things we consume.
Overall, Cindy’s message is about trying to create a more equitable and just world, by steering our family and raising our children with these things at the forefront of our minds. As families are able to take steps toward social justice, this has a ripple effect in the wider community. It is a beautiful and passionate book that we truly appreciated!
Cindy challenged the authoritarian model of parenting by affirming the agency of children in many ways including food and clothing choices. She talked about nurturing emotions including allowing girls to express anger, and boys to express their feelings more frequently in general. It provided ideas for talking to children about sexuality that challenged old Evangelical norms of purity culture.
There is a chapter about healthy spirituality, encouraging conversation, investigation and exploration, which was very illuminating especially since we are in the deconstruction sphere. The chapter about economic and environmental justice was challenging for both of us in a good way. We hadn’t thought enough about consumerism and “ethical consumption” before reading Cindy’s thoughts. By simply bringing our attention to these concerns, we feel better equipped to make healthier decisions about the things we consume.
Overall, Cindy’s message is about trying to create a more equitable and just world, by steering our family and raising our children with these things at the forefront of our minds. As families are able to take steps toward social justice, this has a ripple effect in the wider community. It is a beautiful and passionate book that we truly appreciated!
May 5, 2021
Most reviews (and my friends’ comments) suggest that the podcast is superior to the book, so I’m assuming that’s true.
I read this as a group discussion, and it worked well for that. There were certain sections/topics I could nod my head in agreement and others I couldn’t. On the latter, I enjoyed the discussion with the group and came to realize that I need to dedicate actual effort and mental energy to deciding how and what I believe. How’s that for a vague review?
I read this as a group discussion, and it worked well for that. There were certain sections/topics I could nod my head in agreement and others I couldn’t. On the latter, I enjoyed the discussion with the group and came to realize that I need to dedicate actual effort and mental energy to deciding how and what I believe. How’s that for a vague review?
January 5, 2020
While I completely agree with most of the ethos here and think the message is important, I find myself wishing the book was a little less... hasty... in its conclusions. As an opinion piece, it stands up, but I don't think this book is meant for anyone who doesn't already at least align somewhat with this book's thinking -- e.g., making the argument/instruction for parenting children for racial justice isn't something that can easily be covered in a chapter with just a couple of off-hand citations.
That said, for what it is, I applaud Brandt and wish her continued success in her writing career!
That said, for what it is, I applaud Brandt and wish her continued success in her writing career!
March 5, 2019
I'm grateful for this book and Cindy's words about how we can move past our own insecurities developed as children and raise our own children in equality and compassion where we learn from each other.
October 9, 2019
Transformative
This book has transformed me in crazy ways. I’m raising myself while reading it. Cindy invited me to explore the idea of an all encompassing God and his beautiful creation.
This book has transformed me in crazy ways. I’m raising myself while reading it. Cindy invited me to explore the idea of an all encompassing God and his beautiful creation.
September 26, 2021
Parenting Forward by Cindy Wang Brandt is another parenting book in a sea of parenting books. This is a parenting book for more progressive leaning Christians, or at least Christians who are wary or rejecting of the evangelical and conservative methods of child raising. What this looks like is a way of parenting that is more about developing love, connection, and mutual respect than it is about simply getting obedience and having our kids behave in just the right way.
In general, I really liked the approach of the book. I would say that this is the way that my wife and I have tried to parent. We're not always successful at this, but it is what we want to do. So the general approach of the book is one that I really agree with and enjoyed seeing in a parenting book, particularly a Christian one.
I also enjoyed the focus of a lot of the chapters and how we should develop our kids to desire and seek justice and equality over a number of different categories. I think that these are important things to instill in our kids. I think her taking the time to go through these different ways was a good and helpful approach.
While I did think there was much good in the book, I did have some things that I didn't like quite so much. The first of these is one that I'm kind of mixed on. That is the fact that Brant writes this as a Christian parenting book, but there's very little Bible or Christian slant to the book. On one hand this doesn't bother me much, because she's maybe doing it on purpose to distance herself from the Christian parenting books that use lots of Scripture, but are much more authoritarian in position. I get this and like that she doesn't approach things this way.
On the other hand it leaves her case for parenting this way unconvincing for those who may want more Biblical reasons for parenting this way. If she's just seeking to "preach to the choir" then her way is just fine. However, if she's wanting to convince people who might be wary of the parenting ideas within evangelical Christianity, I doubt she's going to get too far. I think this will also make certain of her chapters more or less convincing depending on how you're approaching as well. I get why she may have made the decision the way she did, but at the same time I also feel like she maybe went too far on the other end of the pendulum.
The other aspect I found myself a bit frustrated with is the lack of any kind of examples of how to do this, and what example are given are a bit lacking in my mind. While I do get that this is probably to allow parents to be creative in the ways that they do these things, having some more general ideas would be a little nice.
I think both of these kind of indicate my biggest frustration with the book is that it just felt too generalized. I liked these general ideas for the most part, but the hows of these ideas are sometimes much harder to wrap my head and hands around. There's not even an attempt to make a foundation for this approach by looking at the Bible or within the faith in general. Maybe her podcast does more of that, and maybe that's where I need to head next, but it would have been really nice to have the book contain a bit more of that kind of stuff.
Overall, I did enjoy the book. I enjoyed the approach that it introduced of trying to parent with love, connection, and mutual respect. As I said it really connected with how I want to parent our kids. My only problem really is that it felt like this was just a very introductory overview of these ideas and lacked a lot of development and practical examples.
In general, I really liked the approach of the book. I would say that this is the way that my wife and I have tried to parent. We're not always successful at this, but it is what we want to do. So the general approach of the book is one that I really agree with and enjoyed seeing in a parenting book, particularly a Christian one.
I also enjoyed the focus of a lot of the chapters and how we should develop our kids to desire and seek justice and equality over a number of different categories. I think that these are important things to instill in our kids. I think her taking the time to go through these different ways was a good and helpful approach.
While I did think there was much good in the book, I did have some things that I didn't like quite so much. The first of these is one that I'm kind of mixed on. That is the fact that Brant writes this as a Christian parenting book, but there's very little Bible or Christian slant to the book. On one hand this doesn't bother me much, because she's maybe doing it on purpose to distance herself from the Christian parenting books that use lots of Scripture, but are much more authoritarian in position. I get this and like that she doesn't approach things this way.
On the other hand it leaves her case for parenting this way unconvincing for those who may want more Biblical reasons for parenting this way. If she's just seeking to "preach to the choir" then her way is just fine. However, if she's wanting to convince people who might be wary of the parenting ideas within evangelical Christianity, I doubt she's going to get too far. I think this will also make certain of her chapters more or less convincing depending on how you're approaching as well. I get why she may have made the decision the way she did, but at the same time I also feel like she maybe went too far on the other end of the pendulum.
The other aspect I found myself a bit frustrated with is the lack of any kind of examples of how to do this, and what example are given are a bit lacking in my mind. While I do get that this is probably to allow parents to be creative in the ways that they do these things, having some more general ideas would be a little nice.
I think both of these kind of indicate my biggest frustration with the book is that it just felt too generalized. I liked these general ideas for the most part, but the hows of these ideas are sometimes much harder to wrap my head and hands around. There's not even an attempt to make a foundation for this approach by looking at the Bible or within the faith in general. Maybe her podcast does more of that, and maybe that's where I need to head next, but it would have been really nice to have the book contain a bit more of that kind of stuff.
Overall, I did enjoy the book. I enjoyed the approach that it introduced of trying to parent with love, connection, and mutual respect. As I said it really connected with how I want to parent our kids. My only problem really is that it felt like this was just a very introductory overview of these ideas and lacked a lot of development and practical examples.
October 10, 2020
Parenting books are not my favorite to read but this was valuable - it's an easy-to-read assessment about the intersection of parenting and justice. The author challenges us to look at specific issues/values that we pass onto our children (attitudes toward bodies, spirituality, inclusion, economic and environmental justice, etc.) and consider how our individual life experiences affect what and how we teach our children about these issues. She also challenges us to see that children have far more agency to make their own decisions than we often give them credit for, and that it would serve all of us well for us parents to honor that agency more.
I've been listening to Brandt's podcast for a couple years, so many of these themes were familiar to me. Reading the book was a challenge to continue examining myself, perhaps make a couple adjustments to parenting habits, in order to lean into the vision of deeply valuing our children.
"Sometimes we are so focused on the potential of children to grow into whatever exciting persons they may be that we forget that they already are those persons, and that their potential may not be lying in the future but embedded within them in the present. Our hope for the world isn't just in waiting for the next generation to rise up for change; it is mining for the hope they generously gift us, if only we have the eyes to see and the ears to hear." (p. 158)
I've been listening to Brandt's podcast for a couple years, so many of these themes were familiar to me. Reading the book was a challenge to continue examining myself, perhaps make a couple adjustments to parenting habits, in order to lean into the vision of deeply valuing our children.
"Sometimes we are so focused on the potential of children to grow into whatever exciting persons they may be that we forget that they already are those persons, and that their potential may not be lying in the future but embedded within them in the present. Our hope for the world isn't just in waiting for the next generation to rise up for change; it is mining for the hope they generously gift us, if only we have the eyes to see and the ears to hear." (p. 158)
July 17, 2022
I’m not sure how to review this book. Brandt is obviously well informed, and well intentioned; however, I find it hard to know what her aim was. I doubt that it was much in the way of convincing someone that bringing up little liberals is the best form of parenting—I don’t know that anyone reading this book wasn’t already in that camp in one form or another. Rather, it struck me as reassurance that raising children who care about justice, love, and belonging in the only world they know is good (and I think she would say, holy) work. I didn’t hate the message, and I did find some meaningful words put to nebulous ideas swimming around my head and the conversations my wife and I have been having around how to organize our family. It was reassuring, but not practically so; I don’t know why I imagined listicles being a part of this book when I read reviews, but I’m glad there weren’t—not to mention that Brandt doesn’t strike me as the lisiticle type, given that she emphasized individuality as of chief importance in a person’s self-conception. If you’re searching for a tender voice around raising the next generations with justice and compassion as guiding lights, particularly if you find yourself in an environment in which this is kind of parenting is viewed skeptically, it’s a nice book.
May 15, 2023
Since becoming a parent over two years ago, one of the most difficult things has been finding helpful Christian books to prepare me for the journey. As someone who learns the most through reading, this is a travesty!
Don't get me wrong, there are hundreds of thousands of parenting books claiming to be "Christian," but so many of them perpetuate a harmful, toxic theology, that they are better off being discarded than entertained at all.
Enter Cindy Wang Brandt. What an exhilarating breath of fresh air! In a space that has been dominated by evangelical fundamentalists, Parenting Forward provides a truly Christ-led approach to parenting in a world that is desperate for children and adults who "do justice, love mercy and walk humbly with God."
I had to sift through this book slowly and methodically, taking countless notes, as to not miss out on any of the exquisite nuggets of wisdom present in its pages.
Parenting Forward should be essential reading for any and all parents who value justice and kindness and desire to provide a solid base for their children to grow up loving others as God has first loved them.
Don't get me wrong, there are hundreds of thousands of parenting books claiming to be "Christian," but so many of them perpetuate a harmful, toxic theology, that they are better off being discarded than entertained at all.
Enter Cindy Wang Brandt. What an exhilarating breath of fresh air! In a space that has been dominated by evangelical fundamentalists, Parenting Forward provides a truly Christ-led approach to parenting in a world that is desperate for children and adults who "do justice, love mercy and walk humbly with God."
I had to sift through this book slowly and methodically, taking countless notes, as to not miss out on any of the exquisite nuggets of wisdom present in its pages.
Parenting Forward should be essential reading for any and all parents who value justice and kindness and desire to provide a solid base for their children to grow up loving others as God has first loved them.
October 2, 2019
On the positive side, Brandt has written an easy to read, cogent and thoughtful book on how to raise (advantaged) kids to be more aware and faithful to the ideals of equality and justice. With passion and humor she lays out a clear philosophical compass toward such a goal. For those who lean left in religious circles, this is an excellent book to give voice to faith ideals.
That said, any reader should know this is far more a theological/philosophical book than a "how to" monograph. Brandt is a big picture author and so leaves the "how" to the insight, wisdom and creativity of the parent. My impression is because she sees every child as unique, so a "one size fits all" attitude is doomed to fail. Additionally, she clearly believes our children are agents who will help craft their own ideas and methods of making the world a better place.
I intend to share this book with family members rearing children.
That said, any reader should know this is far more a theological/philosophical book than a "how to" monograph. Brandt is a big picture author and so leaves the "how" to the insight, wisdom and creativity of the parent. My impression is because she sees every child as unique, so a "one size fits all" attitude is doomed to fail. Additionally, she clearly believes our children are agents who will help craft their own ideas and methods of making the world a better place.
I intend to share this book with family members rearing children.
December 4, 2019
As parents, it's often easier to see the pitfalls we'd like to avy than it is to discern the way forward--the paths we actually want to take is raising our families. Full of inspiration for the latter, this book maintains an attitude is hope rather than pessimism in the face of parenting dilemmas. It addresses such topics as teaching consent, understanding racial inequity, promoting gender equality, etc.Author Cindy Wang Brandt orders an abundance of illustrative stories, many from her own experience. I applaud her commitment to faith; she has forged a new way for herself and her children which is rich in Christian spirituality, despite her negative experiences with an overly fundamentalist upbringing.
Ultimately, I appreciate the way this book Bright issues to light for me to contemplate in my own parenting journey. While there were examples of what to do, I wish there were even more practical suggestions of dialogue and activities to implement.
Ultimately, I appreciate the way this book Bright issues to light for me to contemplate in my own parenting journey. While there were examples of what to do, I wish there were even more practical suggestions of dialogue and activities to implement.
March 12, 2021
I really want my daughter to feel dignified and loved and empowered, and also to pass those feelings on to others in this world (especially people who face oppression due to their race, gender, religion, etc.). This book was a quick read with some personal anecdotes and thoughtful advice. I’ve never read a parenting book, and while this one isn’t packed with heavily researched and detailed analysis, I still have tons of stuff highlighted to talk about with my wife.
I think I was expecting a book that was a bit more "in the weeds" and theologically-connected. Cindy Wang Brandt wrote a book that was much easier to digest by people who may not be interested in that stuff, though. I appreciate her heart and humility and the ways in which she challenges many parents' authoritarian mindsets for raising kids.
I think I was expecting a book that was a bit more "in the weeds" and theologically-connected. Cindy Wang Brandt wrote a book that was much easier to digest by people who may not be interested in that stuff, though. I appreciate her heart and humility and the ways in which she challenges many parents' authoritarian mindsets for raising kids.
January 5, 2020
A fantastic book.
As a cis white Christian, this is such an important book to read. It handles difficult topics such a racism, gender equality, and homophobia and encourages parents to talk about these things with your kids. Glossing over hard issues doesn’t make them go away, preparing your kids for these topics doesn’t take away their innocence. This book is about treating children as whole people, giving them bodily and spiritual autonomy and a voice so that they can shine and make an impact on this broken world.
I would encourage all Christians should read this book, in particular white Christians.
I loved it and I am so glad that this was my first book of 2020. I borrowed it from the library but I want to get myself a copy so that I can reference it. It’s definitely a keeper.
As a cis white Christian, this is such an important book to read. It handles difficult topics such a racism, gender equality, and homophobia and encourages parents to talk about these things with your kids. Glossing over hard issues doesn’t make them go away, preparing your kids for these topics doesn’t take away their innocence. This book is about treating children as whole people, giving them bodily and spiritual autonomy and a voice so that they can shine and make an impact on this broken world.
I would encourage all Christians should read this book, in particular white Christians.
I loved it and I am so glad that this was my first book of 2020. I borrowed it from the library but I want to get myself a copy so that I can reference it. It’s definitely a keeper.
June 20, 2020
This is a challenging read for parents - but that is important and necessary. Brandt offers a needed reframe on parenting —> “Our children raise us.” Parenting is just another step in the life-long journey of figuring out who we are as engaged humans in the world, and children offer us many gifts along the way. More than that, the most important action we can take in making the world a better place is to start with our children. By fiercely guarding their autonomy in all aspects and disciplining ourselves to quiet our lives and hear their voices, we change the world around us in important ways. The book is full of valuable resources and quotes and is a great discussion starter for parents to read together. Highly recommend and I look forward to reading Brandt’s next book!
February 9, 2021
This is a nice short meditation on what it means to parent as a Christian concerned with equity and justice. There are some helpful nuggets sprinkled throughout, and if I become a parent I'm sure I'll return to parts of the book for advice and perspective. Parenting Forward bears some of the hallmarks of an author making the leap from blog to book: there's lots of white space; it lurches a bit from cultural reference to cultural reference (some which already feel dated); and the analysis could go deeper at time. I think this will be a great resource for Christian parents looking for an introduction to social justice and equity issues. In some ways, I'm coming from the opposite direction, being an equity-minded person looking to frame parenting/family in a Christian theological perspective. This book doesn't provide that so much, but I appreciate the snatches of biblical commentary, and Brandt's perspective generally as a thoughtful Christian parent coming from a more toxic church environment.
March 17, 2019
I have been listening to the author's podcasts since she started them in July, 2018. I've learned much about myself while listening to her various interviewees. I've also learned a lot by participating in her Facebook group, Raising Children Unfundamentalist. I started all of this after the birth of my first grandchild, because I want to be a good grandfather.
This book is a distillation of Cindy's ideas, formed over the past years as a faith shifting mother of two, and reading it I can almost hear her voice. Everything is well organized, and I will refer to the various chapters often over the coming years. Thank you, Cindy Wang Brandt!!
This book is a distillation of Cindy's ideas, formed over the past years as a faith shifting mother of two, and reading it I can almost hear her voice. Everything is well organized, and I will refer to the various chapters often over the coming years. Thank you, Cindy Wang Brandt!!
February 10, 2021
I guess...this just wasn’t really what I expected it to be? I am fairly new to parenting books, but so far I have been pretty disappointed in the complete lack of practical advice in books with “How” in the title. I mean, I guess if you want to be nitpicky, in this case the how is in the subtitle, but either way I found this book to be more about the why and about the author’s issues with the evangelical church, which, okay, fair point, but it wasn’t what I was looking for is all.
That said, I do agree with the author on a lot of things, and I appreciate a view of Christianity that is more open than is traditional, but...I just really wanted more depth, I think. A lot more depth.
That said, I do agree with the author on a lot of things, and I appreciate a view of Christianity that is more open than is traditional, but...I just really wanted more depth, I think. A lot more depth.
November 3, 2019
There are too few books like this that encourage and support progressive parents who long to raise tiny humans committed to equality and justice. She reminds us what it looks like to teach ourselves and our child to think critically about race and consumerism, and reminds us to hope. My favorite reminder is that kids are already who they will be and we have so much to learn from them. I hope and pray I’m the kind of parent who continually learns from the wisdom of my children. When in doubt of myself, I’ll return to these words.
December 27, 2019
5 stars because I love the subject matter and hearing from a progressive Christian parent. However, I do feel that this book is a bit “preaching to the choir” — anyone who already identifies as progressive won’t need convincing to raise our children to subvert the abilist racist cis-hetero patriarchy, which I felt was the limit of the scope of this book. The author spends time convincing her readers to care about these issues, but I felt there was no real practical advice (which would have been welcome).
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