Winter's Graces: The Surprising Gifts of Later Life

by Susan Avery Stewart

Filled with unexpected good news about growing older, Winter’s Graces highlights eleven qualities that ripen with age—including audacious authenticity, creative ingenuity, necessary fierceness, self-transcending generosity, and a growing capacity to savor life and to ride its ups and downs with humor and grace.







Decades of research have established that the catastrophic conditions often associated with late life, such as severe dementia and debilitating frailty, are the exception, not the rule. Still, the mistaken idea that aging equals devastating decline persists, causing enormous and unnecessary suffering, especially for women. Drawing on decades of experience as a psychology professor and psychotherapist, Susan Stewart, PhD, weaves together inspiring folk stories that illustrate the graces of winter and recent research that validates them, along with a wealth of user-friendly tools and practices for amplifying these graces and bringing them to life. Written primarily for women over 50 seeking good news about growing older, Winter’s Graces offers adults of all ages a compelling vision of aging that celebrates its many gifts, acknowledges its challenges, and reveals how the last season of life can be the most fulfilling of all.

Genres: Nonfiction, Womens

330 pages, Kindle Edition

Published October 9, 2018

Reviews

[Story Circle Book Reviews · Rating 4 out of 5]

A friend e-mailed a series of pictures—older people each looking into a train window seeing a reflection of themself but a younger self. Touching, but after reading Winter's Graces I'd like to know what Susan Avery Stewart thinks of these shots. I suspect that she would prefer it if the person reflected were the exact person looking out. Likely both would have a contented countenance. Her advice to the backward-looking folks—embrace the now, look forward to the future, and don't ache for what's gone before. Stewart, who is embracing her own eighth decade, uses her memoir to encourage and lead others to reach this place.

Stewart's declared audience is women "in their fifties and sixties who are dreading what lies on the far side of midlife." When in her early fifties, a workshop leader observed that an experience she had shared with the group was "a wonderful crone story." What!?

Suddenly, she realized the inevitability of her own aging.

While those of in midlife may be the target audience, the author stresses that all ages, and both men and women will find much of value in later life. As a Crone past her own midlife—I can attest to that.

The journey she presents can be graceful as the name of the book implies. Using the ancient mythological notion of the Graces as patrons of various pleasures, Stewart offers eleven Graces of Winter, ranging from the pleasures of Creativity (my favorite) to Remembrance and Contentment. To counter too much Contentment, Necessary Fierceness also tells her story.

It is these stories from around the globe—from the Ozark Mountains to India to the Netherlands to Haiti and points between—that intrigue me. They bring the message from these wise crones that life can be full. Along with each story, Stewart offers reflections, many showing her own Jungian training and suggestions for enhancing the reader's own growth. As well, she shares her own journey through the transition: how both her research and her life are unfolding.

Is this book timely? The answer to that question is a clear and emphatic "Yes!" On this day, as I am writing this review, the New York Times observes that an Op-Ed article celebrating the "resilience and joie de vivre of older women" was among the most-emailed articles of the previous week.

by Trilla Pando
for Story Circle Book Reviews
reviewing books by, for, and about women

[Cheryl Suchors · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautiful book! The author provides a banquet of mythology, ancient fables and stories, current tales, wonderful quotes, and a perspective that’s guaranteed to make those of us in the winter of our lives take heart. “Winter’s Graces” is a feast for the mind and spirit.

I read it a chapter at a time, savoring each one like fine wine or chocolate. I particularly liked reading it before falling asleep so the words could flavor my dreams. I now keep it close by, so I can turn to it on a day that feels more gray than colorful, for inspiration.

If you want more zest in your life, more enjoyment from the moments of each day, treat yourself. Read this book! It is rich in rewards.

[Candy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautifully written ... an inspiring look at aging gracefully.

[Maureen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I would rate this book at a 4.5. Excellent book written by a Professor Emerita of Psychology, retired psychotherapist, workshop facilitator, mother and grandmother.

"Winter’s Graces explain the eleven qualities that reach their fullest expression in the last season of life." Susan uses folktales to demonstrate these qualities.

I would recommend this to any woman in their 50s, 60s and 70s..

[Kathy · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book had many interesting insights about the gifts of later life. The gifts explored were
1. Authenticity
2. Self-transcending generosity
3. Courage
4. Creativity
5. Contentment
6. Compassion
7. Necessary Fierceness
8. Simplicity
9. Remembrance
10. Agelessness
11. Wisdom
The book explores each gift through folktales. Then it includes ways to enhance each gift and further readings. The book is one that I read slowly and reflected on each section over a period of days.

[Yvonne S · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read this one at the pace of a chapter a month for a women’s group discussion. Rich with insight and great sharing. For the book alone, four stars; with the conversation and reflective bonding of the group, five stars.

[Rae Simpson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Own. One chapter on each attribute, how to cultivate, how to take advantage. Agelessness, authenticity, compassion, contentment courage, creativity, "necessary fierceness," remembrance, generosity, simplicity, wisdom.

[Melanie · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must-read for any woman 60+!

[Julie · Rating 3 out of 5]

While I was a little disappointed with most of the folklore stories used as grace examples, I did still have a real connection to a few of the chapters, particularly compassion, contentment and wisdom. For me, she hit the nail on the head with those. I would still recommend it for anyone who looks for inspiration and understanding as they move forward in their lives, in retirement and the wonderment of grand parenting. Folklore aside, it was a good read.

[Kathie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Susan Avery Stewart's "Winter's Graces" is a "how-to" for aging adults, with suggestions and meditations on how life can be lived to the fullest in our senior years.
I read "Winter's Graces" for our book club discussion (which I missed because I was out of town), and I can say that it was a nice book, nothing too challenging. I didn't feel, however, that there was much new, and even felt that the first several chapters were slightly condescending in a "now, now, dear" kind of way. Were there nice sentiments? Yes, and probably some good advice, but by the end I felt my back molars aching from all the niceness.

[Rebecca D’Harlingue · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this book to be very calming and reassuring. As I am in the "later life" category of the title, I was gratified to see that some of the things that I had noticed as positives were echoed in this book. Even more importantly, it pointed out many of the "graces" of this period of my life that I had not thought about. The folk tales about wise older women from many other cultures was a wonderful and fascinating addition.