Modern Manners: The Thinking Person's Guide to Social Graces

by Thomas P. Farley (Editor)

As a follow up to the extremely successful Town & Country's Social Graces comes this new collection of essays by some of our most celebrated writers, exploring the need for manners in today's hectic world. Such keen observers as David Brown, Hugh Downs, Frank McCourt, and Peggy Noonan offer their witty and incisive views on how to avoid offending others.

Town & Country magazine has been synonymous with good taste and refinement for more than a century. So who better to comment on the need for manners in a time of constant cell phone chatter, non-step competition, hair-trigger-tempers, and fast-paced lifestyles? Both humorous and insightful, this sparkling collection of essays reflects on the pressing need for kindness, consideration, and civilized behavior. And the list of contributors is stellar: David Brown makes a persuasive plea for civility; Jamie Lee Curtis talks about "Having Dinner with the Family"; Sonya Friedman reflects on motherhood; Charles Osgood comments on everyday courtesies; and Ted Sorenson discusses "Patriotic Pride." With topics that range from the art of listening to good elevator etiquette, these eloquent pieces offer advice worth following.

256 pages, Hardcover

First published September 1, 2005

Reviews

[Kerri · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was an interesting little book I got during a slightly bored period, and a more than slightly irritated-with-lack-of-manners period. It's not all just kicking the latest generation of Americans in the tush for having poor manners; there are some inspirational and funny stories. There seems to be a genre of post-Sept. 11th books that focus on what is better about the world than what needs to be fixed; I think we're all disillusioned enough to be getting cranky again. My favorite quote in this book was by Samuel Johnson: "Language is the dress of thought." Plus I like the idea that good manners means not stooping to others' level of tacky, and that walking away or silence is often the only mannerly thing to do.

[Shari · Rating 4 out of 5]

A collection of 45 thoughtful essays that helps us pause to look at our priorities and how we treat others. I loved "The Art of Listening," by Letitia Baldrige. Also the hilarious "Thank You for Not Sharing," by Andy Borowitz, on eye-roll-inducing holiday letters and an example of the kind of frank letter he'd really like to receive.

[Michelle Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent selection of essays.

[Sharon · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have a particular fondness for etiquette books (despite the fact that I usually wind up deploring that other people don't seem to read them). I like ones from different eras, as it also interests me to see how social mores have changed over time. So, when I saw this book in a small Palm Springs shop, I snapped it up.

Despite the title, it is not really an etiquette book. Thomas P. Farley is the editor of "Town & Country" magazine's "Social Graces" column, and he has selected some especial favorites concerning the annual Christmas letter (referred to in our home as the "brag-n-gag"), cell phones, weddings, and other aspects of daily life. Guest authors include Letitia Baldridge, Andy Rooney and Jamie Lee Curtis.

An entertaining read with short chapters, perfect for the bus, subway or a coffee break.

[Gayle · Rating 3 out of 5]

Sounds like an etiquette book, doesn't it? But it's really a compilation of essays published in Town & Country magazine's Social Graces column. So Charles Osgood discusses the virtues of winning and losing gracefully. David Brown shares insights into the etiquette of a spendthrift living with a tightwad (spouse Helen Gurley Brown). Hugh Downs reveals the joys of great-grandchildren. And Peggy Noonan talks about post-9/11 attitude shifts.

Some are more interesting than others, but I suspect the interest shifts with the reader. The writing is good, the topics fresh, friendly, and within the scope of normal existence, meaning there are no discussions about seating charts when you're entertaining both the French ambassador AND the Sultan of Brunei.

I probably won't read it again, but I enjoyed reading it once. If modern manners are your thing, enjoy.

[Susanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

45 articles contributed from various authors in regard to the subject of social manners. Interesting yet a little redundant at times.