Among the Walking Wounded: Soldiers, Survival, and PTSD

by John Conrad

A gripping account of PTSD, and a stark reminder that, for many, wars go on long after the last shot is fired.



In the shadows of army life is a world where friends become monsters, where kindness twists into assault, and where self-loathing and despair become constant companions. Whether you know it by old names like “soldier’s heart,” “shell shock,” or “combat fatigue,” post-traumatic stress disorder has left deep and silent wounds throughout history in the ranks of fighting forces.

Among the Walking Wounded tells one veteran’s experience of PTSD through an intimate personal account, as visceral as it is blunt. In a courageous story of descent and triumph, it tackles the stigma of PTSD head-on and brings an enduring message of struggle and hope for wounded Canadian veterans. This book is a must-read for anyone who cares about Canadian veterans and the dark war they face long after their combat service is ended.

Genres: Nonfiction, Military Fiction

234 pages, Kindle Edition

Published April 29, 2017

Reviews

[Brentman99 · Rating 5 out of 5]

While I was a serving Canadian Army Logistics officer, Colonel John Conrad and I only crossed paths a couple of times during our careers, but I had heard great things about him. Then after the 2006 tour that I didn't get to go on, he fell off the radar for reasons I never learned. Now I know why.

I did a 9 month tour in Afghanistan in 2009, but I was almost entirely KAF-bound and never lived through the horrors that John did. In retrospect, his recounting of his experiences makes me feel very proud of those I know who went outside the wire regularly, risking their lives and well being then and in the future every time they went out the gate.

Without a doubt this book is the most honest, most selfless and revealing work about the Canadian military that I have ever read. I saw many of these career politics (aka The Mafia) issues from the peripheral while serving and John has nailed them perfectly. I have also seen the toll PTSD has taken in some fellow soldiers or their significant others and know it is a living nightmare that just doesn't go away.

I wish I could say that John is wrong, that things have or will improve to treat those serving and retired alike suffering with PTSD, our walking wounded, but once again, he is spot on. I think and hope that by sharing his remarkably open and brutally honest story, John's book will help the Canadian Armed Forces and Veterans Affairs and take the first step to fixing the situation - by acknowledging that the problem exists and needs to be worked on now. Lives depend on it.

Thanks, John. I have no doubt that this book was one of the most difficult things anyone, especially someone with PTSD could do - to tell someone. It was an eye-opener. I'm proud that it was a fellow Loggie who wrote it.

[Care · Rating 4 out of 5]

A powerful and moving piece about life as a servicemember before and after a traumatizing tour.

John Conrad writes a part-memoir, part-interview collection style that details his personal struggle suffering from PTSD and the stories of others who are similarly affected. He discusses the dreams he has, the support (and lack thereof) he received from the military, from VA services, etc.

While fairly heavy on the technical side, more than necessary for a flowing story, the writing is powerful and unique. It provides valuable and meaningful insight into struggling with depression as a soldier, and makes one really think about how they treat servicemembers and their families. The preface is written by Conrad's wife, beautiful and unique - I wouldn't have minded more from her. This story is one that's often forgotten but that is so incredibly important. I highly recommend to all to read, although please note there is some mature material along the lines of violence and gore.

Thanks to the publisher for an ARC in exchange for a fair review!

[Harry · Rating 4 out of 5]

This courageous memoir reminds me that although there are universal givens in the experience of post-traumatic stress, there are also many individual differences. Overwhelming experience affects each of us uniquely and profoundly, in a multitude of disturbing manners. This is the tale of how the Canadian soldier John Conrad was affected by his wartime experiences, and how those experiences affected him physically, spiritually and emotionally, within his military career and then into his life beyond his tours in Cambodia, former Yugoslavia and - as this book highlights - Afghanistan.

A previous reviewer suggested the book is disjointed as narrative technique. My sense is the disjointedness is part of the truth, that there is perhaps no other way of putting the lived experience of PTSD into the writing. The structure of the book reflects the impact of overwhelming experiences and betrayals. The author struggles to live inside a mind haunted by fragmentation and the irruption of terrifying shards of traumatic emotion and memory as well as periods of numbing and turning inside himself.

PTSD is as much physical as mental or emotional. The brain changes, and this is conveyed well in the flow of the memoir, as John Conrad struggles to make sense of his experiences, sometimes at a loss and floundering while in brief moments finding glimpses of perspective.

The book is a reminder that the true saving grace in recovery from PTSD comes not just from policy and funded treatment but through the fundamental care, concern and support of others. There are moments in the book where the author is touched by something a fellow soldier says to him, such as the connection described with fellow trooper Master Corporal Andy Singh. Those were the times I was closest to tears while reading - knowing the power of this connection and how rare it is.

There are writers now talking about how PTSD is perpetuated by moral injury, by the failure of those entrusted with our care to fulfill their roles (in this case, for instance, failing to recognize the father of a fallen soldier or to anticipate ammunition needs of troops in combat). Jonathan Shay, an American military psychiatrist and writer, has been refining this idea since the Vietnam War, and his ideas are strongly reflected within the lines of Conrad's remembrances.

Conrad is right to hold Veteran's Affairs Canada accountable. Speaking as a member of the medical profession, he could not do wrong holding our medical system accountable as well - we are supposedly a country with universal health coverage, and yet the Canadian medical profession has been remiss in not training and supporting clinicians involved in the treatment of PTSD (perhaps due to the fact that pharmaceuticals are not primary or even secondary treatments for for this condition).

I thank John Conrad for his service and for sharing so deeply of himself and his experiences. May there be more peace and understanding in the world, as a result of his sacrifices, and the sacrifices of his fellow soldiers and family. May readers be inspired to reach out to PTSD sufferers, with kindness and concern and the willingness to act as witnesses.

[Shona · Rating 5 out of 5]

John Conrad's "Among the Walking Wounded" contains a universe of thought. It is a springboard to places of the mind, a look behind the veil of a Canadian soldier's experience of the Taliban summer of 2006, to coming home to civilian life and back to self. How many of us have sat with the silence of our beloved veterans of wars great and small, wishing there were a way to tap into their stories and experiences? Some way to reach inside the trauma, to crack it open to the light of day? John has given us this gift. By sharing his experience we may recognize ourselves or others and connect with the reality that very little but our own ego separates us from others and the truth of our life. For those lost in the labyrinth of the mind, the author offers a way out.. or at least a peek above the hedge to catch a glimpse of the bigger picture, and to offer reassurance that there is a way out. The transformation from walking wounded to wounded healer is not easily accomplished, yet John Conrad has done it well.

[Angie · Rating 3 out of 5]

A powerful read that breaks down and lays bare all that comes with the aftereffects of combat, deployment and PTSD. A few sections get a little more technical than necessary but the brutal honesty of Conrad's writing makes up for it.

[Erik · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent book that stands apart from other Afghanistan memoirs because of its frank, honest and accurate description of one man’s painful descent into the world of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. I served with Colonel John Conrad in Afghanistan and his convoy was recovered to my camp in the wake of the 22 July 2006 suicide attack that killed Corporals Francisco Gomez and Patrick Warren. I am not a doctor, but I know what shock looks like and it was clear to me (and the warrant officers who were serving with me) that Colonel Conrad was deeply affected by the attack.

The book is extremely well-written and provides vivid descriptions of conditions in Kandahar and the challenges he faced when he returned to Canada. Colonel Conrad presents a unique perspective as he went on to serve with the Reserves. He provides a first-hand account of the challenges he experienced when he tried to care for Reserve Force soldiers and their families who were also deeply affected by their service in Afghanistan. The touching foreword, written by his wife Mabel, also presents a poignant picture of the high cost borne by families.

Colonel Conrad provides a clear and compelling account of the mechanical indifference of an Army that was not prepared to deal with the casualties who returned from Afghanistan and the deep institutional biases that made it difficult for him to acknowledge his problem and seek help. The book is particularly insightful because it recognizes how Colonel Conrad’s personal decisions and behaviour contributed to his social isolation and made it more difficult for others to assist him. If a well-connected senior officer had so much trouble dealing with his injury, how much more difficult is it for soldiers and their families? The book also challenges the myth that solders afflicted by PTSD can’t continue to make significant contributions, either in uniform or when they transition into civilian careers.

Among The Walking Wounded is worth reading because it presents a clear, accurate picture of how PTSD and the pressures of wartime military service can affect soldiers and their families. The book should be mandatory reading for anyone working with soldiers afflicted by PTSD, moral injury, and other forms of operational stress injury. It is also highly recommended for anyone providing casualty support and/or transition services.

[Pal Mann · Rating 4 out of 5]

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a mental illness. It often involves exposure to trauma from single events that involve death or the threat of death or serious injury. PTSD may also be linked to ongoing emotional trauma… Canadian Mental Health Association

This CMHA definition of PTSD is simple, sterile, clean…with it PTSD appears to be a simple wound, a laceration that could be treated with antiseptic, sutured, bandaged, and which over time would heal almost back to the way it was, perhaps with only a scar to remind of the damage survived.

If only it was that straightforward.

But, as one reads Colonel John Conrad’s explicit account of his ongoing battle with his demons of Afghanistan, it becomes clear there is never a complete healing. The injury to the brain, to the ego, to the sense of self-worth remains – stitched, scabbed, perhaps covered – but never fully healed. And disjointed smells, sounds, people, words, sights, can evoke emotions that rip apart the sutures holding together the reasons for carrying on.

I have known John Conrad for many, many years. We bonded together as young men, my shoulder buttressing his as we scrummed together on the rugby pitch at military college. I remember all of us sharing clandestine beers in the barracks, as we snickered at his dry, self-deprecating humour. He was a curious mix of farm boy naivety and cynical worldliness…piercing insights covered with an “aw shucks” veneer. He was a tiger on the pitch – a young man’s blend of fearlessness and recklessness – ready to do anything that was needed to contribute to the team’s goal. He was among the 10-15 people that were a large part of my formative years, the young adults who taught me how to take care of others.

And then we moved along our own paths. As is common in military careers, our paths crossed briefly for short bursts, but there were large periods of separation.

The silence was broken by news of his near death due to heart attack; and as the links with mutual friends awoke, there were whispered references to the “challenges” he was facing. It was news to me – shocking news. John was a bull, a soldier’s soldier. Heart attack? Challenges? What? How could it be?

But most of us know, it can happen to anyone.

And as you read his raw account of his journey with the ghosts of his past, those that have not been touched by PTSD get a glimpse of the incessant, eroding nature of this mental illness. It is like rust eating at metal – solid, dependable structures can become weakened and unpredictable.

A solid, caring leader who could read his soldiers – knowing when they weren’t functioning on all cylinders, I know Colonel John would do anything he could to support his soldiers. But, even with all his leadership skills, his story talks to many are unable to recognize the corrosion eating at their psyche and how to counter the effects it has on them, their families, their colleagues, and their careers.

Even John did not recognize what was grinding down his solid, dependable, rationale self into what he labels as his “doppelgänger”.

In the Army, military leaders know there is a hierarchy of priorities – “mission, machine, men, me”. Lives yield to achieving the mission if needed; soldiers’ rest gives way to maintenance as required; and the troops under your command are always, always taken care of before any effort is expended on taking care of yourself.

Hard decisions are made using these basic principles and though the part of you that is the leader understands this, the part of you that is a parent or a sibling or a child or a friend, suffers a tremendous blow as each of your decisions creates hardship for your soldiers, or heaven forbid – death.

And as these decisions accumulate, as your decisions deeply affect the sons and daughters of Canada entrusted to your care – holes form in your mental armour.

Colonel John’s book is an emotional voyage through this period of rusting out and of rebounding and of rusting out again. It provides voice to the array of negative emotions – rage, impotence, futility, emptiness, confusion – that consume those with PTSD. It speaks of the destructive coping mechanisms, of the disruptive actions, of the harsh reactions that are the ooze from this wound.

It is a first person account – letting you experience the personal hell that is Colonel John’s journey to the depth of this other being, the Doppelgänger. But, other than his wife Martha’s honest foreword providing her perspective on both her hesitations about this book and of those who do not understand the family challenges of supporting a soldier overseas and upon return, there is little that tells the story from the third person. We experience Colonel John’s spiral through a deliberately twisting and jumpy narrative - indicative of the thousand of thoughts routing through his brain - but we rarely understand how his actions are interpreted by those he did not trust with his secrets.

In the denouement of this book, John provides a short description of how he may have misread the intentions and well wishes of those who were looking out for him – instead, feelings of persecution - a symptom of PTSD - may have blinded him to the help that my have been available. But, that is a different discussion for another time.

This book is very well written – Colonel John has a gift for conveying detail through simple but incisive language. The book is not long and it could be consumed quickly, if not for the visceral emotions it evokes. I was absorbed in his story but found that I could not cope with another chapter; perhaps because this was my friend, or perhaps because it awoke some of the fears and apprehensions I experienced during my service. Nevertheless, I knew once I started, that I had to finish it.

Perhaps this is a strange characterization, but this is a wonderful book about a horrible subject. While there are many others, this one has a personal connection for me. But while this is Colonel John’s story about Afghanistan, the lead in this story could be a nurse, a police officer, a firefighter, a paramedic, a member of the clergy – anyone who has to respond to the broken pieces of people’s bodies or hopes.

Staying away from the arguments surrounding the adequacy or inadequacy of our leaders’ response to the PTSD epidemic, this book is a soul-bearing narrative of one man’s battle with PTSD. And just as he led the way fearlessly on the rugby battlefield thirty years ago, Colonel John leads the way into this psychological battlefield not only with the hope that writing this story will help him heal, but that it will also help his Forces’ teammates who are suffering the same way, heal.

[Glenn Kerr · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have rarely seen this level of honesty. Conrad lets his wife write the foreword, and it isn't pretty. But, it couldn't be any other way - her distaste for the book making, gives the reader a glimpse of the vitality-crushing symptoms of PTSD, a disease that even scars those closest to the sufferer.

It has taking me a long time to write this review, knowing I can not do the book justice. I went to university with these men and women who now suffer from PTSD, and even though I never spent any time with Conrad, reading his account of what so many soldiers endure, leaves me angry. I am disgusted at how our society and political power abandons those who put their life on the line for us.

Conrad writes in such an authentic manner, you feel like you're living it yourself. After a third of the way into the book, I realized that I was walking around a stressed wreck, and it was because I was letting the reality of his account take hold of me. I know what it is like to hold your head high, puff your chest out and walk through the alpha male dominated Canadian military, acting as if nothing affects you, and denying any effects of mental stress. "Be a man" is an understatement of the military ethos. The only thing real men are allowed to succumb to and maintain their dignity is mortal wounds, and even then, it's got to be a nasty wound.

Why, despite the centuries of knowledge of PTSD under various names, do we not see the true devastating nature of this infliction, and give this threat to national security it's proper antidote? The answer, I believe, is simple: those who make the policies, have never been affected. We have never measured the loss, mistakenly attributing attrition to soldiers just loosing interest or integrity.

Conrad's account will get you as close as you can get, without having direct contact with PTSD. Many times I had to put the book down and stop reading. I had become agitated, angry, sad. The problems around me became trivial in the presence of Conrad's story. It took me a month to finish "Amoung the Walking Wounded", simply because my anger spilled over into my personal relationships and I needed to give this book many rests along the way.

Another reviewer commented about Conrad's style of embedding the psychological disease in his prose, by randomly inserting thoughts of rage, anger and severe self judgement, finding this style distracting. Exactly. You think you had problems reading this and found it disjointed? Try living it. Your annoyance at his literary technique, is the result of his intent to help you understand the uncontrollable nature of PTSD. He's pointing at the disease, and you're looking at the end of his finger.

Will this be the book that changes policy? Perhaps Roméo Dalliere's, "Waiting for First Light: My Ongoing Battle with PTSD" might accomplish that. But Dalliere is a man very much removed from the common soldier. Dalliere reads like a man lost of humanity in his addiction to service, and is unrelatable to us mere mortals. Conrad is a man with whom we can relate. He fears for his life when he should. He seeks balance between work and family. He is very much like you and I, although probably 10 times more dedicated to service. He is a solider and a good man, and then with in the space of minutes, his life is permanently altered in a way nobody can see. Not even him.

I suspect that if you don't have PTSD, you'll never truly understand it. It's an insult to pretend that one can come even close to understanding, but at least you can come that far by the time you're finished "Among the Walking Wounded: Soldiers, Survival, and PTSD"

[Julie Ferguson · Rating 4 out of 5]

In Among The Walking Wounded, author John Conrad bares his soul. It is both his story and that of others who suffered and still suffer from PTSD. Conrad was a senior officer in the Canadian Army in Afganistan early on in the mission.
The book reads in a disjointed manner, which I consider to be a deliberate tactic on the part of the author to show the reader what the condition feels like. We follow Conrad through his rotation and aftermath; we see him initially believing all is well; then we feel his struggle to behave normally and leave good impressions; later we see everything fall apart. Eventually we sit beside him as he reluctantly gets help. By this time he's lost his army career and is now in the reserves. (BTW reservists get abandoned the moment their Class C contracts end, so readers need to give that some thought too.)
The story is distressing and brutally honest.
This book should be required reading for all in the military, all politicians, and all civil servants especially those in DVA.
Strongly written and heartbreaking. Highly recommended.

[Brent · Rating 5 out of 5]

It takes great courage to speak so openly about PTSD; I commend Colonel Conrad for doing so in this brutally honest memoir.

[Jeff · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Soldier words have the hard edges of coins and they fall into place like exact change."

So writes John Conrad in Among the Walking Wounded: Soldiers, Survival, and PTSD a book about his experiences with post-traumatic stress disorder and how it adversely affected his life and those closest to him. That he narrates his own story is crucial to the book's relevance. Bookstore shelves are stocked full with second-hand accounts of psychological war wounds usually written by psychologists, journalists, or military historians. All reference material. This book is a personal and candid insider's view of what it's like for soldiers returning from "areas of conflict" (ie. war zones) and the difficulties they often face reintegrating back into the "real world."

Conrad's post-deployment experiences are unfortunately all too universal. As a returning soldier you can be consumed with unreasonable amounts of irritability, edginess, and impatience, often avoiding contact with friends, family, and co-workers. You're sometimes completely consumed by worry when there's no good reason to be. This worry is most intense in public places, particularly in crowds especially if the surroundings are unfamiliar to you. It can be difficult to shake the feeling that you're not safe and that something bad is about to happen to you or a loved one which leads to an unreasonable amount of hyper vigilance on your part, always perceiving a threat that isn't there. In times of extreme stress it feels as if someone else has stepped into your body and caused you to lash out at strangers and even family over trivial matters. Eventually you can't help but feel that it's best to just avoid leaving your house altogether except for when you absolutely need to. Worst of all, you will probably think that you're the only one feeling these feelings and that it's best to just keep them to yourself.

Not all of the above applies to Conrad's described experience but there is some common ground. This book is an effective wake-up call for any soldier or veteran experiencing any kind of post-deployment anxiety issues. You're in good company and even Commanding Officers experience them.

Conrad also uses this book as a forum to take the Canadian government to task for its failure to properly take care of injured veterans. He freely disperses some of that "exact change" alluded to in the Raymond Chandler-esque passage quoted at the top of this review towards Veterans Affairs Canada whom he accuses of blatantly "slowing down the flow of support to veterans" by throwing up red tape in order to "wait out the old, broken soldiers." The top brass of Canada's military aren't spared of Conrad's vitriol either. He calls them out for putting procedure over function, always prioritizing the superficial needs of the organization over the welfare of the troops themselves. Too often senior officers, even when retired, will continue to tow the company line, so to speak, and refuse to speak out against this flawed system.

If you're interested in first-hand, qualified opinions on the state of Canada's military today, the war in Afghanistan, or if any of what I wrote in my second paragraph resonates with you, you will enjoy this book. Remember, it's not strictly a "military book." Anyone who has had difficulty moving on from a particularly trying time in their lives will find value in Conrad's account of his experience.

[Candice Baillie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book and how open these soldiers are about their struggles I recommend this book for anyone who has family member who is struggling or if you are a soldier suffering great read.

[Stephanie Pieck · Rating 4 out of 5]

Many novels and nonfiction books give accurate and moving depictions of PTSD from a physical perspective. Or they touch on the way the disorder affects a person's mind and emotions.
"Among the Walking Wounded" places readers deep inside the mind and emotions of the author, and for this insight alone, this book should be mandatory reading for anyone with an interest in how we can help soldiers returning to civilian life.
In the past, the military and the men and women who served in it or alongside it had a much larger role in our culture. Today, however, a majority of the civilian population have no meaningful connection to the military. Most people couldn't name the places where our troops are deployed, and even if they could, even fewer could explain why they were there, how long they had been there, or what their main tasks were during deployment.
"War" used to be clearly defined, too. It was armies going onto a battlefield and pounding each other until one of the armies went home--or both decided to call it a draw.
Military personnel today still must maintain a constant vigilance and guard against potential attacks. But there is no clear "other side". Many engagements occur seemingly without warning. Even if someone notices something amiss, it is often too late. IED's, use of "suicide bombers" to deliver an IED, snipers hidden in urban landscapes ...
Even with regular patrols and rotation schedules, there are long stretches of boredom. Trying to combat this boredom while simultaneously trying to maintain readiness and alertness for potential battles is perhaps the most difficult aspect of the "new" warfare our troops are engaged in.
When military personnel come home, debriefings are certainly done. But how does someone who has spent the last months--or years--scanning every inch of the road they're driving on for IED's smoothly transition back to a world where people chuck stuff out car windows all the time without a second thought?
That's only one example. Entering buildings can pose another perceived threat. So can being in large crowds, small spaces, ...
The author, John Conrad, was deployed as part of the Logistics Branch of the Canadian Army to Afghanistan in 2006. Stationed in Kandahar, he was responsible for maintaining the supplies for a group of fighting men and women. During his tour, he had to deal with an unforeseen shortage of ammunition and a double suicide attack on one of the convoys he was part of.
Conrad has given readers unprecedented access to thoughts and emotions. An unflinchingly honest book, it is painful to read, just as it must have been painful to write. Many times during the book, I found myself wishing that someone had noticed how much Conrad was struggling after he came home, or that he had allowed himself to ask for help.
Still, Conrad explains why he chose not to ask. His depiction of the tangle of mistrust, anger, depression, anxiety, denial, self-destructive behavior, self-medication, guilt, exhaustion, apathy, grief, hopelessness, helplessness, impulsiveness, and sense of worthlessness are revelatory. PTSD doesn't just affect the person who has it. Family, friends, and colleagues all bear the burden. On top of that, there is still a stigma that characterizes soldiers who suffer from mental health problems. So it's no wonder that they are afraid to speak up or get found out.
Even as progress has been made, the depth of misunderstanding is heart-breaking. As we approach Remembrance Day and the centennial of the ending of World War I, this book has important things to say to all of us, military and civilian alike.
Conrad isn't the smoothest writer. However, he speaks the truth of his own experience, which undoubtedly mirrors the experiences of thousands of others. Please, read this book, think about it, and share it. A soldier's life may depend on it.

[Ashley · Rating 4 out of 5]

An incredibly powerful and important book. I work for DND and I think it's vitally important for civilian staff to understand the challenges faced by the soldiers we work with. I appreciate the glimpse into a world I'm adjacent to yet will never really be a part of. Several parts of this book made me feel so angry on Col Conrad's behalf and I think there are some glaring flaws in our government that betray our soldiers.

[☘Tara Sheehan☘ · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was glad Colonel John Conrad included a list of terms and abbreviations at the very beginning of his book because it really helped provide a more thorough understanding of the story he was trying to tell. The Foreword by his wife is incredibly moving and provides a unique insight into military life as well as the story that needs to be told and remembered so that soldiers from all walks of life and countries can receive the honor they deserve.

This is not just a non-fiction textbook on military life to read with a passing fancy. It’s a love letter to all of those who love humanity so much they willingly sacrifice their lives – and mental health – for us. Conrad writes with a passion and beauty that can only come from someone who took that oath to protect millions of people.

The personal accounts of what we ask men and women in uniform to do is heartbreaking and the fact that they wake up every day choosing to uphold our safety no matter where that promise takes them is uplifting. Conrad doesn’t just provide stories, he shows you the faces of the millions who form an unbreakable wall between our way of life and danger.

He describes not just the people but also military events, the explosions, the blood that haunt their nightmares so we may sleep peacefully. Not only do they put their physical lives on the line but they also give up their mental ones; risking the possibility they may never again hold the phrase “sweet dreams” to be true because for them the war did not end when they got on the plane ride back home.

This is a book that MUST be read and absorbed because the cost our society pays is nothing compared to what our soldiers have been forced to give up. We owe them, all of them whether they are in your country or in an allies. Conrad’s focus is on Canada’s soldiers in this book but the lessons are true across global lines. PTSD does not discriminate against culture, race, gender or political boundaries.

Conrad’s writing will evoke anger, tears and pride from anyone who gives him a chance to tell his story.

When you are done reading this, go thank a soldier. You’re alive and have the life you do because of them.

[Len · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received my copy via a Goodreads giveaway.

This book is transparent and raw - very dense with detail. The author is quite tough on Veteran affairs Canada, re: how they treat him after his tour of Afghanistan.

[Nancy · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was selected for me to read by our local library. I am disabled, and I know military people who've been very trapped in the traumas they participated in or lived in troubles when a loved one has been a"peacekeeper" or a soldier. This was not an easy book for me to read. It was not intended to become a bestseller. It is the story of a single man's difficulties in Afghanistan. His words are neither gentle , nor pretty, nor anything but direct and informative. This was a very educational read for me, despite my unfamiliarity with the terminology of our military organization here in Canada, or around the world.
If you can make time to read it, you will develop an insightful appreciation for the plight of good-hearted men who wish to serve their country. You will become less capable of blind judgment.

[Scott Clancy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having served alongside the author I know of the extreme professionalism combined with deep personal compassion that he led and served with. This is an important work to help all of us understand the personal trauma, family trauma, and emotions surrounding military service, and especially combat operations.

[T. Fowler · Rating 3 out of 5]

An enlightening, very honest account of the effect the Afghan mission had on a senior officer. It must have taken courage to reveal the struggle he had, to admit that he suffered emotional injury from Afghanistan, how he avoided confronting it, and how he finally dealt with it.

[Ron Johnston · Rating 5 out of 5]

Among the Walking Wounded…

Thanks John – first for your service for all of us Canadians and the people of Afghanistan… Secondly Thanks for your Brutal Honesty and Unvarnished Truths found within Among the Walking Wounded, Scarce Heard Amid the Guns, and What the Thunder Said…

The latest – Among the Walking Wounded rips open many festering wounds… Brilliant descriptions and graphic details leave you in Suspense from the very beginning… Following is a description of the Kandahar Airfield… Choking dust of Antique Shit and Sweet Smell of Fresh Sewage – a Curious Cocktail…

At another point Conrad talks of an embarrassing faux pas of his… he felt “like a Checkers player suddenly realizing he has been sitting at a Chess Set”…

On describing his first Remembrance Ceremony after returning from Afghanistan in his own home town of Orono – “the Ceremony had little to do with remembering rather it was all about local Politicians and the upcoming Election…” This is far too TRUE EVERYWHERE today in TODAY’s Politically Correct Environment… I know that I plan to get this into the hands of a few Politicians… I only hope that it can help the desperate situation apparent in Veteran Affairs Canada and the Lack of Support for OUR WALKING WOUNDED…

Well Done John – Old Friend…
Ron Johnston

[Madelaine Shaw-Wong · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. So powerful. Gives great insight to what life is like for soldiers when they return from duty.