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Modern Ranch Living

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The weather is hotter than hell in Tucson, Arizona, and weird things are afoot in the crumbling desert community of Rancho Sin Vacas. Sixteen-year-old Kendra hones her muscles and grapples with bad grammar, occasionally worrying about her brother, Thomas, who spends all day watching wrestling on TV. Their neighbour Merv is stuck in a rut, still living at home at thirty and looking after his troubled mother. When the strung-out teenager from over the road, Kendra's sometime-boyfriend, goes missing it affects them all in different and surprising ways. And although Kendra is apparently unconcerned, claiming that he's just run away, she can't shake the feeling that something strange is in the air this summer.

304 pages, Paperback

First published September 8, 2004

159 people want to read

About the author

Mark Jude Poirier

10 books18 followers
American novelist and short-story writer.

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5 stars
57 (25%)
4 stars
86 (38%)
3 stars
59 (26%)
2 stars
18 (8%)
1 star
3 (1%)
Displaying 1 - 25 of 25 reviews
Profile Image for Ron.
761 reviews145 followers
April 8, 2012
Modern ranch living, as portrayed in this novel, takes place in an ageing gated community on the outskirts of Tucson, where the Code of the West has been replaced by a carping, adolescent irritability. Empty and desolate lives in the air conditioned, pool-in-the-backyard suburbs is not exactly a new theme to literature, and Poirier's effort to give them a postmodern twist labors manfully to rise above the conventions of the genre. Larry McMurtry's endorsement on the back cover notwithstanding, the dark humor of the book is not especially original or funny. The day-per-chapter structure slows down the narrative to a pace that often seems plodding, while the exchange of insults among characters who are quick to find fault with each other becomes repetitive and occasionally tiresome.

The central characters, a sixteen-year-old teenager obsessed with body image, health foods, and a punishing exercise regimen, and a thirty-year-old college drop out living at home with his emotionally unstable mother while managing a water park, remain sympathetic and exhibit an embattled kind of integrity in a world of "losers" and "jerks," and they are eventually rewarded for their uncompromised truth to themselves. The single plot strand that holds the narrative together (the disappearance of a boy from the neighborhood) yields not a very plausible resolution, and for the novel's leisurely pace, it raises questions that it never answers - like, what is the meaning of the purloined collection of athletic gear under the porch?

Recommended for readers whose youthful memories of the suburbs are similarly jaundiced. Just about everybody gets their licks from high school counselors to rude drivers, college creative writers, junkies of all kinds (fast food, meth, magic markers), high achievers who end up in corporate cubicles, and people who don't know which way is west.
Profile Image for Ashley.
57 reviews1 follower
June 13, 2010
A Tucson setting. Just started this read, the featured characters are not apparently yet acquainted, but it seems that they must be intended to merge some time soon. One is a high school girl with a fondness of weightlifting, a sort-of bully with a lot of self-discipline. The other is a 30 year old lifeguard at a waterpark, who still lives at home with his mother, who suffers from insomnia. He feels inferior and stuck. H seems to have a complex about being an underachiever in life.
Profile Image for Admiral.
14 reviews
June 2, 2012
Really enjoyed this. Slice of life tale set in Arizona one summer. Plussing as which, this guy can write.
Profile Image for Tony.
1,731 reviews99 followers
January 7, 2019
Poirier's latest book returns to the Tuscon setting of his excellent previous novel, Goats, to meander through a long, hot summer in the lives of two somewhat strange neighbors in a suburban gated community. Kendra Lumm is a fitness-obsessed teenager, spending hours every day running, swimming, weightlifting, and eating right. Aside from her body, her main concerns are her genius/nerd older brother, her anger management therapy sessions, her strange (and hilarious) verbal syntax, and the mysterious disappearance of the boy down the street who kinda-sorta-not really used to be her boyfriend. Also down the street lives Merv Hunter, a 30 year old water park manager who shares his insomniac mother's home. He's the only one of his prep school friends who never went on to college, and although he's very good at his job and likes it, feels the stigma of never having left home and gone on to bigger and better things.

Over the course of the summer, both will meet new people, learn things about themselves, and ultimately grow and mature. There's not much of a plot, per se, rather the book drifts along like the summer, as the reader gets drawn into Kendra and Merv's routine. Hovering the background, and occasionally stepping forward, is the plotline revolving around the the missing boy. A renown huffer of magic markers, he'd last been seen hanging out with some seedy, BMX-riding tweakers (methamphetamine addicts) who also happen to hang out around Merv's water park. However, for the most part, the book just meanders through the summer. Kendra grudgingly goes to her therapy sessions, attends a summer class where she makes a good friend, ponders her brother's sexual orientation, and heaps scorn upon his loser girlfriend. Merv attends to the daily routine at the park (including helping out a rich wheelchair-bound patron who has a debilitating muscular disease), and worries about his mother. A trip up to Phoenix to hang out with his old high school buddies (now pudgy cubicle-bound ex-dot commers) leads to a woman entering his life, and the possibility of a new relationship.

There a great deal to enjoy here, from little details about Kendra (for example, like other fitness compulsives, her first evaluation of a person is based of muscle definition and tone), to the way the desert heat comes alive. Characters are constantly in and out of pools, flipping air-conditioning on, and always in search of something to drink. The supporting cast is universally vivid, from the water park's ex-jock security squad, to Kendra's ex-punk parents turned vintage toy seller and golf pro. Interestingly, virtually every adult in the book has some kind of character flaw or problem, and there's a distinctly satirical aspect to anyone who has lots of book learning (examples include a poetry professor, and Harvard Business School grad, and Kendra's therapist). It's all part of Poirier has a skeptical take on traditional authority figures as well as the utility of dominant mass cultural trends and mores. The book's humor is a little hard to convey properly, one hesitates to use the word "quirky", because that implies a shallowness that the book is far beyond. Yes, there are some over-the-top strange events in the book, and yes, the protagonists are a little strange--but mostly Poirier's people are very human, and the way they act and react to the world around them is very real. Another strong work from one of the most talented young writers around.
Profile Image for Lynne.
2 reviews
January 7, 2020
Very well written portrayal of one summer in Tucson. A bit of mystery mixed in with everyday events which amount to overall character growth. The main characters are likable despite their flaws.
Profile Image for Jen Hill.
1 review
March 20, 2020
The characters move this book along because there isn't much plot to speak of... the disappearance of Petey is the one thread that keeps the reader going until the characters begin to shine with all their grease and all their flaws. These are real people in real situations, doing what we typically do. I went in with no expectations and quite enjoyed this book and its characters.
150 reviews4 followers
October 27, 2024
The only other book by Poirier I read was Goats. Which defines quirky. But great and compelling.
This Modern Ranch Living novel is better, IMHO, and its characters are beautifully rendered. Warm and delicately raunchy.
Profile Image for Els Devrieze.
80 reviews1 follower
May 15, 2021
A weird story, but really great... took me some time to get into it, but I’m really glad I kept going
Profile Image for Christina.
257 reviews2 followers
March 25, 2023
I would have given this book a 4 but the ending was a bit weird. I loved the eccentric characters and dialogue and how the author made the Tucson suburb come to life.
Profile Image for Chimene Bateman.
672 reviews5 followers
December 26, 2023
A distinctive, original and very funny story set in Arizona. Memorable characters, especially the teenage Kendra, bodybuilder and poet despite herself. A pleasure to read.

Profile Image for Jo.
86 reviews
February 4, 2024
Tucson hasn’t changed much in the last 20 years except more traffic, more tweekers, and more heat.
Profile Image for Alex.
34 reviews2 followers
July 26, 2013
I am a bit surprised at the number of glowing reviews that this book has picked up. Perhaps it is because I bought it with no real idea what it was about, and, having a different cover (featuring some vintage Americana style faces and text in the style of a 1950's advert) I guess I must of expected something different, I think, to be honest, I expected something decidedly more funny. The book certainly looked, and from the back cover, sounded, funny. The problem of course was that I just didn't think it really was. A surreal sort of book on the misfits of society, and focusing an awful lot on a frankly nondescript water park, I felt the book never really got to get going. Yes, things did happen, it just didn't feel like they ever happened fast enough, nor were they big enough to be important. Kendra, the main character, was not someone I particularly identified with, and I always had the issue with imagining her somewhat along the lines of a girl I knew from childhood, who I disliked- Though I am sure it was not the authors intention, I felt she came across as 'thuggy'.

Perhaps most irritatingly of all, her poor grammar, and tendency to say 'Plussing as which' was something that I picked up for a few weeks after finishing the book- something that definitely did not impress me at all.
Profile Image for Charles Briggs.
4 reviews
May 15, 2013
As an inhabitant of a damp English county I was astounded that anyone could live or would want to live in the furnace that is Tucson in the summer. It is little wonder that the books inhabitants all seem so listless and dysfunctional the heat must drain even the most driven of people.
I found the characters fascinating and well written, they really held me in which was good because the story while effective was really just a diary of the every day lives and events around the disappearance of a wasted youth. Although end had a nice twist.
Well worth a read
Profile Image for Melanie Ullrich.
177 reviews10 followers
September 12, 2014
I have read countless books about the beautiful landscape of the southwest and the noble people that have mastered living amongst that rugged terrain. This book is the total opposite. I was once again blown away by Poirier's ability to bring out the rawness and banality of living in a bustling city in the middle of a desert. His characters are huffers, buff chicks with bad attitudes, and lovable losers all living their messed up lives which are perfectly complemented by scorching heat, monsoon season and wildfires.
Profile Image for Sara.
64 reviews1 follower
September 26, 2007
So far - so good. The main character (Kendra) is alittle out of my realm but she's warming up to me. I loved that Kendra's brother Thomas shouted out to the bouncer guy that Kendra's number spelled: TURFBAG. When Kendra and Crystal pour urince into a guys car - that brought me back to something my friends and I would've probably done back in high school.

I leave this book at a 4, because the author never did clear up the jock strap collection underneath the porch.
Profile Image for Emily.
4 reviews
September 7, 2007
Having meet most of the Poirier Tucson clan and hearing their childhood stories, as well as a huge fan of underground Tucson, Mark's novel is very entertaining and insightful and a joy to read. Modern Ranch Living has very dark parts and well developed characters, as does Mark's other novels and I enjoy his writing style.
Profile Image for Adrienne.
238 reviews34 followers
November 30, 2007
One of the main characters in this book bugged me.. specifically, the way she talked. It was brought up in the book, but was never really resolved or explained - it just seemed to be there to give the author something else to write about. I mainly read it because it took place in the desert.. and I have a small obsession with the desert.
Profile Image for pea..
363 reviews43 followers
August 23, 2010
sadly, when i read the title i instantly tied it to the magazine "atomic living"... that was a mistake.
i am still wavering back and forth it i liked it...if it was good. i would read the other works by Poirier but not paying full price.
Profile Image for Jason.
288 reviews3 followers
April 25, 2015
The first 200 pages or so were outstanding. What happened after that? The rest of the book is thrown together in a very unsatisfying manner. It seems like the author had no idea how to finish the plot lines.
Profile Image for Martin.
2 reviews
July 9, 2011
I picked it up because cover were saying that it is evergy comic novel which really is I laugh each page few times
Profile Image for Rebecca Cook.
86 reviews8 followers
May 4, 2016
Strange but engaging tale set in Tucson. I liked it quite a bit, but most of my book group voted thumbs down because it was too "weird."
Profile Image for Oryx.
1,150 reviews
February 15, 2025
It was fine and easy but I lost interest tbh. Plussing as which, I didn’t want to pick it up which speaks volumes.

Had high hopes but turned out to be just another book on the shelf.

Alas.

3.6997
Displaying 1 - 25 of 25 reviews

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