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Journey to Softness: In Search of Feel and Connection with the Horse

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Internationally acclaimed horse trainer Mark Rashid shares and analyzes the remarkable events, quiet moments, and humbling stumbling blocks that—looking back—he can identify as significant in his personal journey to finding “softness” with both horses and people. “Softness,” via what many in the horse world today might refer to as “feel,” begins, Rashid says, with one simple “It’s not about what we do that starts us on the path to softness, but rather, it’s what we don’t do.” Softness is having the sensitivity we need in order to feel when and if the horse tries to “give.”It is about develping the kind of awareness and feel it takes to know when we are working against our horses, rather than with them. In these forthright stories, readers get a glimpse of a life that has produced a man known for his ability to solve difficult problems with communication rather than force, as well as methods and techniques gleaned from decades of work with horses, horse people, and the “way of harmony” through the martial arts.

186 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 12, 2016

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235 people want to read

About the author

Mark Rashid

48 books129 followers
Mark Rashid (pronounced RASH-id) is an internationally acclaimed horse trainer known for his ability to understand the horse’s point of view and solve difficult problems with communication rather than force. He began working with horses at age ten, when he met the “old man,” who taught him to work with horses, not against them, and to listen to what the horse is trying to say. Mark’s clinics center on one-on-one work with horse and rider and are immensely popular with people around the world.

When Mark decided to study the martial art of aikido as a way to improve his horsemanship, he brought the same quiet determination to it that he exhibits in his work with horses. After years of practice, he has earned a second degree black belt in Yoshinkan aikido and now teaches the “way of harmony” in the local dojo.

Mark worked full time on ranches for many years gathering herds, managing stock, and training horses. When time permits, he still enjoys working on ranches near his home in Estes Park, Colorado.

Mark has been a guest on NPR’s The Horse Show and was featured on the Nature series on PBS. He is the author of nine books - Considering the Horse, A Good Horse is Never a Bad Color; Horses Never Lie; Life Lessons from a Ranch Horse; Horsemanship Through Life; Big Horses, Good Dogs, & Straight Fences; A Life With Horses; Whole Heart, Whole Horse; and his latest, a novel, Out of the Wild. He also has a solo music CD Song of the Prairie and enjoys singing and playing guitar with a local band The Elktones.

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5 stars
213 (68%)
4 stars
70 (22%)
3 stars
23 (7%)
2 stars
4 (1%)
1 star
1 (<1%)
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews
Profile Image for Manda Scott.
Author 26 books710 followers
May 22, 2018
Essential reading for being human

If you work with horses, this book is essential reading - actually, it’s essential living.

If you don’t work with horses, this book is essential reading - actually,it’s essential living.

I’ve just sent the link to all my senior shamanic students as a way (I hope) to help them understand the core of what we do.

It’s magical. But it’s what humanity is for - finding connection with the world around us. What horses give us is such an inspiring reflection of our own inner world, so we can make our inner changes and see-feel the evidence. Buy it. Read it. Make it happen. It’s who we can be. - and need to be if we’re to change the story of our reality.
Profile Image for Steffi.
27 reviews
September 29, 2024
Eye opener
This will change everything
Not only for horse people
This is meant to be read by every human
Profile Image for Amber.
980 reviews15 followers
December 28, 2021
I love reading Mark's books. He has a special talent for not only painting a picture in our heads, but also teaching us a lesson in the same stroke. Being a horseman is some kind of super power, and Mark is here trying to unlock that power for each and every one of us average citizens. In this book, he discusses softness, feel, and connection. And it's way more than just pressure in the rider's hands and legs. Softness comes from within. He describes it as more of a spiritual balance. Whenever you are highly aware of what you are thinking and feeling and how it is impacting your own body and your horse. It's incredibly intuitive and he gives us plenty of examples how softness in ourselves can affect our horses in a large way. I can't wait to try some things with my mare to see if I can catch onto this softness. Five out of five stars!
Profile Image for Natalie Ho.
9 reviews2 followers
October 16, 2017
I really enjoyed this book but I have to say that among the few books by Mark Rashid that I have read, this one was harder for me to understand and left me pondering a lot about what it is he means quite a lot of times.
This might have to do with the fact that I don't work with horses on a daily basis and nor have I ever owned my own horse, but understanding the "softness" and the "connection" that was described in this book was a little difficult for me.
However, it was still a very thoughtful and enjoyable read. It leaves me just wanting to be able to interact with horses even more in the future and become very mindful and aware that softness is not just when we are with horses, but it is a way of life.
2 reviews
September 27, 2022
This was a very good book. In the beginning, I thought that the book would only be about the experiences that the author had with horses, but once I got deeper into the book I found that he had included experiences from every part of his life. If it was from his early years or more recently he always found a way to make a connection with softness. Rashid chose certain people that have come in and out of his life to share some of their experiences. After each chapter, I enjoyed seeing what each person had to say about the experiences that they had with Rashid and the things that they learned. This book was structured in a way that helped to keep me interested and further enjoy it. Reading this book was a very memorable experience.
Profile Image for fruitbatwoman.
343 reviews16 followers
August 16, 2018
While the books by Mark Rashid are rarely on the practical side, but rather offer insights into the correct mindset and ideas for horsemanship, this one went even one step further and into an almost spiritual area. The focus is on softness and feel, something every horseperson strifes towards, and Mark Rashid's point is that in order to achieve both during horse riding, we have to first achieve them in our daily lives as well. I liked the point and the stories he shared, as usual, as they gave me a lot of food for thought how to handle the horses in my life. However, I did not enjoy the stories of other people as much, and found them needless fillers to an otherwise great book.
Profile Image for Amanda.
734 reviews8 followers
January 19, 2018
I wish there was a 4.5 star option. Rashid delivers poignant lessons in small, easy to digest bites. Softness isn’t an easy thing to describe but he does a really good job. He comes at it from different directions so that if you don’t understand one metaphor chances are you’ll get the next one or the one after that.
1 review
January 18, 2022
Real horsemanship

Mark Rashid by this book teaches us all in order to be a good rider, you need to be a good horseman.
I am not a horse trainer but this book has helped me to understand my horse better, more so feeling my own cues. I have become much softer not only in my hand and aids but myself. I am noticing much softer communication with my my horse.

Great book
Profile Image for nlagirl2AW.
21 reviews1 follower
June 20, 2019
This is a good read on horsemanship

I have heard many horseman talk about feelings and softness, but I think Mark explains it where the common horseman can understand it. Good job Mark.
Profile Image for Kelsie Donaldson.
261 reviews25 followers
February 19, 2021
Another great book by Mark! I really liked the little stories he used to demonstrate his points, and it was interesting to consider the connection between riding and martial arts. I do think this book went a little too abstract at times, so it falls just behind Horses Never Lie in my rating.
2 reviews
January 19, 2024
feel

I wrote an article on Feel, but found Mark added another dimension to the concept. His message has helped me enormously with my own horse. I love what he writes, and also the personal thoughts of the other contributing writers in the book. It is a book for everyone.
16 reviews4 followers
May 8, 2018
Working towards Softness

Love the readability and the stories. Working on the soft feel. Sometimes it’s there and sometimes it’s nowhere to be found.
Profile Image for Donna Kinsey.
2 reviews
November 29, 2019
Very enjoyable read and a nice reinforcement of my own personal journey to more and more peace and feel in my horsemanship. I look forward to reading his other books as well.
Profile Image for Andres Navas Gomez.
16 reviews
July 21, 2020
Romantic Horsemanship

Contains some good ideas, easy to read. Gets boring in some story descriptions.
Not a book for people looking to improve their riding techniques or skills.
Profile Image for Porterhorse.
128 reviews
March 19, 2021
Well-written in an accessible style, information applicable "right now". Lots to reread to gain a deeper knowledge.
Profile Image for Loni.
335 reviews2 followers
May 18, 2021
Fabulous advice. Rashid is an "anti-gimmick" horseman who believes in listening, observing, and dealing with soft and patient interactions with our horses.
9 reviews1 follower
January 22, 2022
Simply amazing read! This is the type of book you will read more than once. Absolutely loved it ❤️
Profile Image for Jeannine Winkel.
32 reviews2 followers
March 21, 2017
Another amazing book by my favourite "horse guru" and one that I believe every horse person should read. I love how he just keeps telling stories from his own live with (and without) horses and leaves it to the reader to take their lesson home from that. His style makes it a pleasure to read.
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews

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