Once They Hear My Name: Korean Adoptees and Their Journeys Toward Identity

by Ellen Lee, Marilyn Lammert, Mary Anne Hess

A testament to the more than 100,000 Korean adoptees who have come to the United States since the 1950s, this collection of oral histories features the stories of nine Korean Americans who were adopted as children and the struggles they’ve shared as foreigners in their native lands. From their early confrontations with racism and xenophobia to their later-in-life trips back to Korea to find their roots (with mixed results), these narratives illustrate the wide variety of ways in which all adoptive parents and adoptees—not just those from Korea—must struggle with issues of identity, alienation, and family.

Genres: Adoption, Nonfiction

200 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2008

Reviews

[Betsy McGee · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a Korean adoptee this should have spoken volumes to me. However, it was more a collection of interesting personal narratives rather than a ground-breaking thesis on issues of international adoption and/or identity. But overall, I thought it was enjoyable...it was particularly nice to feel like "I'm not the only one" to doubt where ethnicity and identity meet.

[Allison Doyle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I began reading this as part of my research for a novel I'm currently writing, but it's definitely hit home for me and expanded into something I probably should have read a long time ago... though it was only published a couple years ago. I agree with some other reviewers that there are some pretty "depressing" stories in here, but only looked at from a certain light. I wish I had been able to read this when I was a teenager who, like many who submitted stories in here (and I met one of the submitters a long time ago) was struggling with being an adopted Korean in a majority conservative, white, Midwestern setting.

I'm thinking about recommending this book to my mother to read, but I think she might take that recommendation the wrong way. I definitely think this book (and perhaps others like it) should be read by adoptive parents or people thinking of adopting, because one of the issues I struggled with growing up as the youngest child in an otherwise biologically-connected family in a majority white environment was that sometimes I felt like when I talked about the racism I experienced or the feelings I had, I was told that I was imagining things, or everyone assumed it wasn't as bad as I was saying because no one else in my family had ever experienced that type of discrimination or stereotyping.

Anyway, it was an emotional book, I would definitely recommend it to other adoptees or adoptive parents, but with a warning that it by NO MEANS is what everyone experiences, however I found a connection with something in every single one of the stories, and that was nice in itself. Writing-wise it also expanded my knowledge of adoptee stories (I have gone to culture camps and back to Korea as well), which will be helpful in writing. And I do agree with another reviewer... in the end these were all positive essays in my mind because everyone found a way to identify and come to terms with their adoption and identities. Which is a process I'm still going through so it's nice to know that others have succeeded :)

[Kim · Rating 3 out of 5]

Intersting book. Came as a recommendation from a friend. Weird to see pieces of your life in everyones' stories. All the stories are different yet they definitely share common threads. Frustraions are evident, anger is palpable, and the feeling of being lost is most prevalent. But, regardless of the difficult journeys some of the book contributors take, in the end it's about (in the words of one of the book contributors) accepting those things that cannot be changed and being grateful to just be you. Great book for anyone who is adopted, has adopted or looking to adopt.

[Allison · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book includes nine first-person narratives given by Korean adoptees to the United States from the 1950s - 1980s. All of the adoptees were adults when they gave their interviews. As an adoptive parent of a Korean-American child, the insight given by these adults is incredibly valuable. The focus of the book is on identity formation and role international adoption played (or didn't play) in that process for these people.

[Maureen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is not meant to be a feel good book on adoption, but rather it is a realistic look written by adoptees. I appreciate the honesty and openness of each story. It is a powerful look at racism and how far adoption has come since the 1950s.
While I felt sad for some of the adoptees, I believe that adoption is a story of loss and in even the most perfect situation there is sadness. We cannot expect every story to have a happy ending because we are about to adopt or have adopted.

[Heidi · Rating 3 out of 5]

A friend of mine recomended this book to me since she too is adopting from S. Korea. The book is interesting...all personal stories of S. Korean adoptees who are now adults. BUT...I found the book totally depressing. Every adoptee's story was more depressing than the last. I guess I learned some good things, but really...couldn't they find at least one uplifiting story for us?

[Dina · Rating 3 out of 5]

The book contains a number of summaries of taped interviews of adoptees from Korea between ages in the 20s to the 60s. It was fascinating to read about how little the adopted families were vetted in the earlier years. Most were stories about the adult adoptees searching and often finding their biological parents.

[Kimberly Pavlovsky · Rating 5 out of 5]

A family friend and co- worker to my mom was one of the nine interviewees.
It is really enlightening, a quick read and easy to see yourself in if you are an adoptee.
All nine stories varied greatly but had similar threads that held the whole book together.

[Melanie Nielson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed the honesty, and learned a lot. However, it was negative and depressing.