Death by Carbs

by Paige Nick

It's not a whodunit, it's a who-donut.

When someone kills diet guru Professor Tim Noakes, Detective Bennie September has more suspects than solutions.

There's the widow. With the Prof gone, she can sell her 'Noakes-Endorsed' Meal Plans without anyone raising an eyebrow.
Or was it the ex-publisher? Turning down Noakes's bestseller killed his career, so maybe he was returning the favour.
What about one of Noakes's jealous co-authors?
The CEO of SnackCorp has also been acting strangely - there's never been a worse time to head up a confectionery company.
And are all the fans really as loyal as they seem? Everyone knows how angry hungry people can get.
Plus the internet is full of trolls and haters, but would any of them have the guts to come out from behind their screens?

As the suspects' lives intertwine, and their motives become clearer, Detective September has his work cut out for him. He might just be able to figure out whodunit, if he can keep his hands off the next donut.

More twists and turns than a koeksister, this laugh-out-loud novel will have you spurting bulletproof coffee out your nose.

Genres: Fiction, South Africa

181 pages, Paperback

First published October 25, 2015

Reviews

[Haroon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Stayed up till early hours of the morning reading this gem...just couldn't put it down. Absolutely loved it! It is incredibly funny with twists and turns on every page. Fascinating insights into South Africa, fads, social media, games people play and the fickleness of fate...😊😎

[Sergio GRANDE · Rating 4 out of 5]

Can a murder story be funny?

Yep. This one is.

Funny, not because it deals with dieting people but because life in South Africa is often funny. Unless you're an outsider. Then life seems funny the other way -nothing to laugh at.

The author risks not connecting with a wider, global audience by employing Seffrican slang and mannerisms impossible for the uninitiated to understand. Silly thing because everyone knows that the Seffrican public is not into buying books. Especially not books by "local" authors (their demeaning expression, not mine. tsk...). The jury docks her half a point.

The author makes the brave choice of having her Seffrican characters speak in their own language, with their mannerisms and idiosyncrasies. Admirable. The jury awards her an extra point for authenticity.

Final score: 3¾

[Alison Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious who-dunnit by one of South Africa's best comic writers.Banting guru Dr Tim Noakes *(b.t.w. he's a real, live resident of Cape Town, even as I type) is murdered by a hitman - chaos ensues when the ambulance conveying the body to the mortuary is hijacked by two incompetent bad guys and the mayhem compounds with every page - jealous co-authors of a banting book; fervent Facebook fans;a back-sliding banting CEO; adultery; bribery; conspiracy - just another normal day in sunny South Africa, but elevated by the fact there's a laugh on every page. And well done, Paige: I'm dying (not lit! ) to read your next novel.
*P.S. When interviewed by the local press on how it felt to be the body in a murder mystery, Dr Noakes was a good sport, and laughed. "Give that man a Bell's" - South Africans will understand the joke; but I'm not sure it's allowed on the banting regime ...

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

An hilarious, and I mean laugh-out-loud funny, and authentically South African book, complete with all types of South African shenanigans. I read it in two sittings.

[Tiah]

Interview with the author:
http://shortstorydayafrica.org/news/t...

Quotes:
– The Professor had been a genius, and she would definitely light a candle in his honour tonight, regardless of whether honey was on the orange list or not. –

– Not a day went by that Trevor didn't wish he'd gone into bacon. People would always like bacon, wouldn't they? –

– People seemed to lose all manners and judgement once they had a monitor as a barrier between themselves and real life. –

– 'And once you've stopped bleeding, I need you to reorganise African Fiction. That section is a bit of a disaster.'

'It's going to take more than a bit of reorganising to fix African Fiction,' Frank mumbled. –

– Step away from the keyboard right now. Remember, we agreed, we do not respond to trolls on the internet... –

[Joe-Lin Kohn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thoroughly enjoyed every minute if this book! Paige cleverly took the classic "whodunnit" concept, and injected it with a uniquely Cape Townian flavour and added a carb-free dose of witty, tongue-in-cheek humour, keeping me on the edge of my seat. Highly recommend for someone looking for a lighthearted read. Paige, I really hope you are busy writing the sequel.

[Maire Fisher · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's incredibly hard to write successful comedy - real chuckle then laugh-out-loud material. Paige Nick has that light (not lite) touch. I've yet to meet someone who hasn't enjoyed Death by Carbs (and that includes my 88 yr old father!).

[Lorraine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Paige is such a riot! Nobody, that I know of, does satire like her.

This book had me in stiches from the first page till the last page. I am so glad that I picked it up after the emotional rollercoaster that was "Reflecting Rogue - Inside the mind of a feminist". I needed to regain some semblance of a balance. I needed to bring some normality back to my environment. Some feng shui back to my immediate surroundings. And Paige gave me just that.

Through "Death by carbs" I realised that my world could've been shitty but #Thol'ukuthiHey there are people whose lives are miserably carb'd up. (Notice the play on CARBOHYDRATES there👀👀👀👀) I realised that the lack of bread and pasta and potatoes will literally drive a person insane.

Paige drew me into this web of a story from the first line. I found myself reading with saucer-large eyes for clues on who dun'it😲😲. I found myself leafing through the pages oblivious to the smells of burning potatoes. Served the family right. Now we shall Bant. Hilarious characters whose development grew more and more bizarre. The whole plot was a case of "What more could possibly go wrong?". This was a subtle slapstick at societal social pressures delivered in a believable manner. And the setting was so right. Only in Cape Town, hey???

"Shank you Tim Noakes, I am a lean meat and potatoes girl!"

4 phat stars, Paige🌟🌟🌟🌟!!

[Rosemary · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great fun!

[Alwill · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had so much fun reading this and I didn't want it to end! The novel has a bit of fun at the expense of the followers of the Banting diet and Tim Noakes, and will have you guessing who killed the Professor right up until the very end. I especially enjoyed getting into the heads of the characters, each with their own self-serving agendas and issues, each trying to put themselves ahead in the game, at any cost. However with the humour injected into every chapter things never become too serious and you're sure to have a good laugh.

A great read that I would highly recommend!

[Lood Du Plessis · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a fantastic light-hearted spoof novel! I read it on a 2 hour plane trip and it was fantastic. The book pokes fun not only at the banting/Noakes diet fad and the reactions to it, but also touches on a myriad of other truly South African issues. It is a great spoof in the form of a classical whodunnit with a cast of characters that will make you giggle out loud.

[Jayne Bauling · Rating 5 out of 5]

Clever, funny takeoff, literally laugh-out-loud. Assorted characters scramble either to cover their tracks following the death of Banting guru Professor Tim Noakes, or to profit from his demise. Personal favourites: two hugely entertaining hijackers, and the way the hilarious Banting for Life Facebook page brilliantly reflects so much that is typical of social media.

[Robyn · Rating 3 out of 5]

A spoof of a novel which aptly describes living in Cape Town especially with the Banting crowd. Funny, very readable and oh so very apt. Especially thought the 'Facebook page' couldn't have been done better! As for the conclusion of the novel, pretty pretty good. Go read it.

[Penny de Vries · Rating 3 out of 5]

a great fun read. Very amusing. i especially loved the Facebook personas and posts which were so apt

[Gerda Laubscher · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wonderful read, 4-star rating might be overstating it but 3 stars would understate it. Love all the themes and the satire included

[Warren Mcknight · Rating 5 out of 5]

Incredibly funny, humour flows through out each sentence, each page is funnier than the previous one. Not a very avid reader but this was finished in a total of 3 hours.

Brilliant author!!

[Mpume ngobese · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think Paige Nick was having fun when writing this book; it is hilarious.

[Roz · Rating 3 out of 5]

Banting is pretty big in South Africa, and Prof Tim Noakes has a lot to do with that. So in this book, Paige Nick has him murdered and we then see who all is likely to have done it. There are soo many people to choose from.

In a comedy of errors, where things go from bad to worse for the body (or not... I suppose it depends on your perspective), where people benefit from the death, where confessions fly, where... Agh, just read it if you're interested.

This is a light read with with some funny twists and events. There is some clever humour. But mostly, this is very South African. Loads of slang I didn't even understand.

[Riley Herbert-Henry · Rating 5 out of 5]

The thing about a Paige Nick novel is that you’re going to laugh out loud - a lot.

Death by Carbs is a hilariously twisted romp through South Africa’s Banting scene, where carbs are criminal and someone’s taken that way too literally. Paige Nick serves up a murder mystery so deliciously witty, you’ll laugh your way through every page, and maybe eye your bread basket a little differently.

With quirky characters, sharp dialogue, and a plot packed with surprises, this book is both satire and suspense done right. It’s clever, fast-paced, and totally addictive. You won’t put it down until the last crumb.

Warning: may cause uncontrollable snack cravings and spontaneous giggles.

[Karen Price · Rating 3 out of 5]

A whole lot of mischief. Great fun.

[Tamar · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wow! Loved this. Unsure if you'll enjoy it if not South African or at least visited Cape Town. Didn't expect the end. Easy, funny read

[Alison · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a fun, fast read. A real little comedy of errors where everyone is potentially a suspect and not a suspect at all. So many relatable South Africanisms in this book. Loved every second of it.

[PointyEars42 · Rating 3 out of 5]

Come on Netflix - this would make a great SA comedy movie.

[Sipho Lukhele · Rating 4 out of 5]

I almost gave up on this book, more specially of one character who kept lying about her receipts being endorsed by Prof. Noakes. This book is really enjoyable but felt like a lot of repetition. However, the twist at the end, which reminded me of another title I read this year, Two months by Gail Schimmel, was a work of genius. From this book, I was reminded by the importance of diet, especially the danger of carbohydrates and the false lives people portray on social media. I recommend this book as it is good, and a light read.