How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man

by Mary McHugh, Adrienne Hartman (Illustrator)

The author of How Not to Become a Little Old Lady returns with a guide to recognizing the signs and symptoms of being a grumpy old guy!

A crotchety old man decided to wash his sweatshirt. He threw it in the washing machine and yelled to his wife, “What setting do I use?” His wife asked, “What does it say on the shirt?” He yelled back, “University of Texas.”

If this man sounds like someone you know, chances are he’s a crotchety old man! We all have a crotchety old man in our lives. Maybe he’s your father, your grandfather, your brother, your husband—or (though you'd never admit it) even you! Crotchety old men stand in the middle of the kitchen and say “Where’s the butter?” They buy cans of broken cashews because they’re cheaper. They yell at news anchors on television, and believe “You look OK” is a compliment. This lighthearted celebration of grumpy old men provides 250 hilarious truths about cranky, crusty old guys who would rather spend days trying to build something than read the instructions. Also included is charming and humorous art by Adrienne Hartman.

Genres: Humor

142 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 1, 2004

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.

Reviews

[Terry · Rating 1 out of 5]

The observations offered are extremely dated, tired, and humourless. Reads like it was written by a frustrated writer from 'The Honeymooners'.

[E.H. Nolan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh, this book is hilarious! Readers of any age will enjoy it, not just those on the brink of old age.

This pocketbook is full of adorable little cartoons, funny jokes, and stories. The first page consists of the words, “Crotchety Old Men…” The following pages include fragments to complete the sentence. If you have fond memories of your grandpa who was marginally or majorly inappropriate, you’ll howl with laughter. If your husband has turned into a grump in his old age, you’ll laugh even harder. And dads? If your dad fits the description of a crotchety old man, you’ll laugh the hardest.

So, since pretty much everyone in the world has known or does know a crotchety old man who. . .
“Think women were born to clean—like their mothers”
“Never learned to put a new roll of toilet paper on the rod” (My dad)
“Love to explain things you’ve known for years”
“Say ‘Whatever happened to Betty Grable? She had great legs.’ ” (My grandpa)
“Don’t see anything wrong with calling a woman ‘a broad’ ” (Me!)
. . . pretty much everyone will love this book. Go out and buy it, and get ready to pee your pants with laughter!

http://hottoastyrag.weebly.com/how-no...

[Dan Ray · Rating 1 out of 5]

A friend gave me this as a gag for my birthday.
It's very quick, and snippy. The jokes are so dated I had to check the publishing date. There's boomer-humour galore, so casual misogyny and racism. But since that's essentially the joke it fits.

It's a list of crotchety old man behaviours. Sometimes with cartoons.

[Sarah · Rating 1 out of 5]

A truly awful eBook. Out dated and poor formating.

Formatting is off for an eBook. Several pages don't work as the formatted font.

But on top of that its written for the old man to be an early baby boomer or even older. Reading this before buying for my Gen X husband and the references are just plain old and tired.

Not every book needs to be on KU. This one can go away.

[Regina Olson · Rating 1 out of 5]

belittles men

This book is a list of “facts” about older men, but it was sad to me. We as women do not need to belittle or speak disrespectfully of men to make ourselves feel more important.

[Koren · Rating 2 out of 5]

At one or two lines to a page, I'm not sure this should actually count as a book, but hey, if GR wants to count it, so be it. This was a Kindle Unlimited choice. Don't think I would actually buy it unless it was a gag gift.

[Karen Ng · Rating 2 out of 5]

I couldn't stop laughing. The author has a wicked sense of humor and keen observation. Off to read the women one now. These are a nice break from my recent heavy reads.

[Adam Bricker · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quick read with some funny one liners

[Cami · Rating 5 out of 5]

so funny

I laughed so hard at this book!! Deff would be a great gift or gag gift !! I recommend this to anyone who needs a good laugh!

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Yes, I know one crotchety old man! LOL.

[Jim · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is not funny; the jokes are old.

[James · Rating 3 out of 5]

None of the jokes were new.

[Don · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not even remotely funny. The book is just 140 pages of insults against the “stereotypical male” from the 1950s.

[Karl Rhynas · Rating 2 out of 5]

A few good ones but mostly not.

[Lisa · Rating 2 out of 5]

A total waste of time and money.

[Kathleen · Rating 3 out of 5]

A good gift for the over-the-hill old fart in your life! Maybe a little dated in its references, but the sentiment still applies.

[Jeff Putnam · Rating 3 out of 5]

Humorous