My Melancholic Diary

by Iva Kenaz

Fourteen-year-old Lisa is obsessed with a hero from a medieval novel she’s been reading, honourable guard Tertius. Eventually, Tertius starts to manifest in Lisa's life and she befriends him. The two melancholic souls begin helping each other with their romantic dilemmas. Lisa finds herself drawn to her scoundrelly classmate and Tertius longs to reunite with the love of his life despite the depressingly written destiny. Besides losing herself in fiction, Lisa also wishes to reconcile with her father, an erratic painter whose crazy mind always finds something out-of-ordinary to focus on.

The story is about creating your own reality, re-writing what you dislike about your past and start writing a brighter future.

Genres: Young Adult

167 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 3, 2014

About the author

Iva Kenaz is an award-winning author, publisher, and speaker whose books are significantly influenced by metaphysics and nature magic. She studied Screenwriting at the Prague Film Academy and holds an MA in Creative Writing. She's also an avid researcher of ancient wisdom and teachings, especially those of the magic symbols, sacred geometry, runes. She also writes about her visits to parallel worlds and dimensions, particularly the elven or fairy realms and the afterlife.

Iva's many visionary books include The Witch Within, The Goddess Within, The Merkaba Mystery, Alchemist Awakening: An Alchemical Journey Through the Zodiac, Manifested, Francois Villon, Runes: Magical Codes of Nature, Tree Magic, Sacred Geometry and Magical Symbols, Sacred Geometry Symbols, and many more.

For more information please visit her website: www.ivakenaz.com

Reviews

[Veronica ⭐️ · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lisa, a shy reserved fourteen year old girl, has come to live with her estranged father while she finishes her last year at school before moving to America to live with her mother.
Lisa finds school boring and her mind often wanders to her favourite novel and more so the character of Tertius, a medieval knight. Tertius appears to Lisa in a spirit sense and tells her he is not happy with the story at all. “The author wrote me all wrong,” he says. They form a strong bond and help each other with their relationship problems so each may have the life they wished for.
What happens to a character after a book ends? Do they live in some character limbo or go on creating their own adventures?

”If you feel like you don’t like how your story goes, just write it differently. You have the tools, the courage, the power………you have it all! ~ Tertius

The story is told through Lisa’s diary entries; therefore we are privy to her inner thoughts and insecurities. She thinks she likes Elijah, a boy in her class, but she is not sure. Did he look at her? Was he being nice to her? Lisa is always worried what others will think of her so she turns away from any interaction preferring to spend time dreaming of fictitious heroes.

I loved the character of Lisa’s father a self proclaimed genius, a temperamental artist and doomsayer. He was very eccentric and had little time for people, denouncing them all as idiots and degenerates. Lisa speaks of her dad with such warmth and affection, even in his most difficult moments, you can’t help but feel endeared to him. I enjoyed the way their relationship grew.

”If someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to, it doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.”

I recommend this book to young and old, it truly is an endearing story.

I absolutely loved this story. Thank you Iva for my copy to read and review.

[Kshitij · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was one of the books I can’t write anything negative about because I was completely smitten by the beautiful writing, perfect editing and a thoughtful plot.
After reading the premise,I had a feeling that I'd like it. My melancholic diary is a well constructed story of 14 year old, Lisa who is confused of her desires as most teenagers her age. Lisa is shy, sensitive and witty but she usually struggles to get over general gloominess. The author has really nailed the character. Lisa’s action and behaviour were apposite to her age. Her interaction with the fictional hero Tertius was also believable. It was so nice to see how she weaved a story to help him out.
Overall this is the book you wish you can read time and again because it’s so emotional – in a positive way. I loved the dreamy nature of teenager and her wish to find the perfect love. Not all dreams can be true, but dreaming gives you solace and satisfaction and an idea of what you want at first place; no matter what the situation is. Read this diary and you’d left wanting more of it. The best thing about the book is that it is touched by innocence and never looked pretentious. I wish the author the best and hope she keeps writing such stories...

[J. Schlenker · Rating 5 out of 5]

At first, I wasn't sure if this was my type of book, mainly because it is a teenage story, but it was much more than that with a deeper message. The more I got into it, it clearly was my kind of book. Lisa's parents are divorced, and she is spending a year with her father, an artist, and the parent she clearly needs to work out her issues with. She is reading a novel, a fairy tale, about a princess in a tower and a somewhat reluctant prince who keeps coming to her or manifesting as a real person. They use each other as springboards to discuss their own insecurities. Of course, a girl of fourteen would have plenty of insecurities, but we all have them, even a handsome, charming prince. She writes all of this out in her journal, her trials, and tribulations with her father, her crush on a boy named Elijah at her school, meeting a new guy, an older guy, among other things, while trying to finish the story of the prince. In doing so, she is writing her own story.

In summation, Lisa has clearly grown as in the story she starts out as a fourteen-year-old and turns fifteen. Her thoughts are about the metaphysical aspects of life. The title Manifested takes on more meaning as the story progresses. Can we write our own life? Can the characters of authors be so developed that they take on a life of their own? I definitely think yes to both questions.

I believed it all, even the prince coming to life, except for the father making enough money to live on as an artist. That is only because I am an artist. But, maybe this book will teach me how to rewrite that part of my life.

[A.S. Johnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

For those who know my reviews, I don't give out 5 stars to every book I read! With that said, this novel is worthy of all 5 stars!
Nicely written, great pace, and a truly enjoyable story. A story within a story to be exact and a colorfully told one at that. Excellent YA/Teen novel that will spark your interest from the first chapter and keep you hooked until the very end. You will learn the meaning of Melancholic by the end of this book... and at times want to shake Lisa and tell her to grow up and have a spine, but within the pages of another story Lisa finds the strength and courage needed to live her life in the here and now.
I highly recommended to everyone who enjoys a well written novel, interesting characters, and a story that everyone of us can relate to that is masterfully interwoven with a plot that develops and blossoms. Great weekend/holiday read for all ages, very teen appropriate.
~A.S. Johnson, author

[Darlene · Rating 5 out of 5]

I want to thank my GoodReads friend, A.S. Johnson for recommending this treasure to me. She was right, I did love it!

Once I got the recommendation I found that I could get it through Kindle Unlimited so I set about getting it right away. I already had tons of books ahead of it on my 'currently reading shelf', but I got around to it finally. So glad I did!

Where was this book when I was growing up? Oh, yeah, the author probably wasn't born yet. What a great way to learn how fanciful a diary could be! When I was a young teen I had one of those diaries that had a little lock on it. Why I needed a lock always made me laugh. I rarely wrote anything in it beyond "I breathed in and out today."

That a person in grade school chose to stay the last year of grade school with her eccentric father in the countryside near Prague in the Czech Republic so that she and he could iron out their differences, shows the maturity of the main character, Lisa, who is 14 nearly 15. But the book is full of mature themes but not in a preachy way. I think there is so much depth in this book that anyone of any age would find something to glean from it.

Lisa, the diary writer, the main character, of course, has a romantic heart and the adolescent inadequate self-esteem. Not too different from most people her age, but when you are that age, you don't realize that. In fact, I wonder how many people outgrow that?

So seeing Lisa's musings of her life and loves didn't feel far from most people I know. Except for the fictional character that becomes alive for her. At first, that is shocking in such a mature girl, but as you watch the rest of her life you see that this ghost from another book guides her as much as she guides him. It is the one relationship that is working for her. What a grand idea! We should all have our own fictional hero/heroine who can speak to us while we write out the character's destiny. Oh, yeah, we who write do just that! That is if we are writing daily. Gulp. We should be writing daily. Note to self...

Anyway, I highly recommend this book to everyone. I think even males will like it.

[K.M. · Rating 5 out of 5]

My Melancholic Diary is a charming story that vividly threads together a young girl’s relationship with her father, her school crush, and a character from her favorite book. Fourteen-year-old Lisa, is shy, insecure, and struggling to forgive her father, a painter who is mercurial, obsessive, and borderline narscisstic, for his erratic behaviors and four-year absence from her life after his divorce from her mother.

Much like myself at her age, Lisa is a devoted reader and hopeless romantic. She is especially fixated on a medieval story about a guard named Tertius who falls in love with a princess destined to wed someone else. At the same time, Lisa has a hard time putting a name to the feelings she begins to feel for her classmate Elijah, a former nemesis that has begun to show interest in her.

In the midst of trying maneuver her way through these very real relationships, Tertius shows up in her room one day as sad and lost in love as she is since his princess sailed away with another. The two romantics form a friendship and try to help one another with their relationship problems.

There’s so much more to this story, but I don’t want to give anything away. Just know that I thoroughly fell in love with both the fanciful and real elements that were woven so expertly together. The young girl in me connected with Lisa, as I recalled my insecure, bookish tendencies. And although I have no idea what it’s like to have a neurotic, obsessive painter for a father, he was my favorite character, uttering my favorite quote of the entire book: “Never stand under the chandeliers, girls! One never knows when they fall. Let it fall on the degenerates not you.”

All of Kenaz’s characters were well-developed, but the father stood out to me as this vivid, very flawed man. And yet, as the story wore on and the father-daughter relationship developed, it was evident how much he truly loved his daughter.

Delightfully quirky and at times poignant, My Melancholic Diary was a true pleasure.

[Dana Burkey · Rating 4 out of 5]

The characters in this book were so well developed and easy to get to know. I feel like I had a clear image of who everyone was, even the first time I heard about them. I liked the believable action of Lisa and Hanna, and although crazy, Lisa's dad was a great and strong character that provided a great contrast to the other characters.
Some of the language felt a little too mature for the age of the character, but I think it kind of works since she is in Europe. Her language skills might be more advanced due to her culture.
All in all this was a really fun book. I don't know that I have ever read anything quite like it before!
I received this book free from the author.

[E.M. Cooper · Rating 5 out of 5]

'My Melancholy Diary' is a beautifully written story that felt dreamlike and was like nothing I’ve read before.

Lisa is reading her diary written 16 years earlier when she was fourteen and living with her father in the countryside near Prague. The story focuses on her last remaining months of elementary school before she leaves him to live with her mother in New York. Iva Kenaz captures the emotional reflections of an intelligent and sensitive girl, who is facing change and uncertainty. Lisa is wrestling with shyness, her parent’s separation, and a growing attraction to boys. She is caught up in her inner world, over-analysing people and her life. Her best friend, Hannah believes she’s a ‘depression addict and a masochist’.

The book is character rather than plot-driven, encompassing the philosophy and psychology of destiny, love and the meaning of life. At times, Lisa worries she is going mad as she struggles with her place and future in the world. Her confusion and inner turmoil lead her to daydream about Tertius, a 15th century fictional character from the pages of a book she has read. He is an idealised man, who becomes quite real in her mind. When he materialises and they talk and counsel each other, you wonder if the novel has crossed over to the fantasy genre.

Iva Kenaz’s writing style is lyrical and lovely. She builds her characters with clever and often humorous observations. Lisa’s eccentric father is particularly well-developed. The novel’s atmosphere is wistful and melancholy but finishes on a satisfying and uplifting note that lingers long after you reach the end.

[Deidre Huesmann · Rating 5 out of 5]

My Melancholic Diary is positively enchanting. I made notes on GoodReads whilst I read, and I couldn't help but notice how similarly styled this is to old V.C. Andrews works. Only instead of incest, abuse, and rape, we're reading about young love, the power of fantasy, and how your average girl deals with day-to-day life.

Lisa is obsessed with a character from a book named Tertius. He's dashing and handsome, and in love with a princess Lisa initially dismisses as haughty and arrogant. But as she reads more of the princess's story, Lisa appears to gain some empathy for her. One of the best things about this book is the way that she and Tertius find a way for their planes to cross and they speak of love and life.

The conversations are flowing, the characters are believable, and in particular Lisa's dad is quite the character; ranting, raving, obsessed with the end of the world and stroking his own ego. If I'm honest, he was the most vivid character of them all and in a strange way almost as relatable as Lisa. While it does seem like he outshines the main character, Lisa's calmer behavior balances his out perfectly. It's always a fascinating read.

The story could have used a little tightening with wording, but overall it's smooth, flowing, and downright magical in its simplicity. An absolute must-read; I devoured it in just a few sittings, and I have a small baby at home! That's how captivating this book is.

A+, and I hope to read more from this author.

[Katrina · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the second book by Iva Kenaz, and is a beautifully written, atmospheric coming-of-age tale. In a literary world populated with tales of 'special ones' who discover they are unique, gifted, and destined for great things, it is refreshing to read about one that most of us can relate to. Lisa is a normal teenager with normal self awareness and low self esteem, awkwardly trying to maintain a relationship with her slightly manic father after her parents' divorce, and coping with being an outsider at school and an upcoming move. It isn't any wonder that she has retreated into the world of books, in particular, one.

What I liked most was the question presented regarding creation and our freedom and ability to choose. Lisa finds herself in the extraordinary position of being able to interact with Tertius, the protagonist of the novel, as she is able to help him alter his fate which the author had left incomplete. For most authors, our characters do tend to come to life, at least in our heads, but it is nice to think what it would be like if they actually were alive in some other dimension---what their thoughts would be on the story we have forced upon them and what they could change if they had the power to do so.

Highly recommended

[Heidi Skarie · Rating 5 out of 5]

My Melancholic Diary is a heart-opening coming of age story about Lisa, a fourteen-year-old girl, who finds it easier to live in books than in real life. She is living with her eccentric, artist father for a year. She hasn’t seen him after her parent’s divorce four years ago. She longs for her father’s love and is struggling to fit in at school.

Lisa loves one of her books and relates to the main characters who is a guard and hopelessly in love with the princess he guards. He doesn’t have the courage to tell her how she feels. One day the guard appears to Lisa in an ethereal form. They start talking and soon become friends. With the guard Lisa can talk about her feelings. They share much in common because both of them feel that they have no control over their lives. But both of them want to be the hero of their life, the writers of their own story.

This book shows the inner turmoil and thoughts of a shy, depressed teenage girl. I recommend this book especially for teenage girls. It would give helpful insights into what a teenager might be going through for parents and teachers.

[Jim Murdoch · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a story of a teenage girl finding love and most of all finding herself. The author actually tells her own story which makes it very personal and impactful. The love she seeks involves her estranged and eccentric yet loving Dad, an unlikely boy at school and of course the fictional character Tertius.

The author draws from later experience and knowledge as we read the teenager's diary of her inner struggles and outer insecurities. This book could be a treasure for young teens, and anyone else of course, as they see their own fears and apprehensions expressed. I like how Iva has continually built in and built up the idea of being the creators of our own realities. Tertius certainly helped, wherever he may be.

If you have ever, or perhaps still do, spoken to an imaginary character maybe from a book you have read then I am sure you will understand how Tertius becomes a wise advisor in her times of need.

The book is well written and will certainly challenge the way you view your own reality.

[Antonin Bouda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was very excited to hear that Iva Kenaz published her new novel! And having read it, I can honestly tell I was once again pleasantly surprised. It's different from her debut novel, different settings and themes but in some ways it's similar. It's about a girl growing up and getting over her fears.

I read the book in one breath. There were so many questions set up at the beginning that it made me want to know how Lisa, the main character, resolves them.

It's a girl's story, however, I believe it's interesting and most enriching to look into a girl's mind for us men sometimes. I love the authors style and her poetic writing. I think this book is not only for teenagers, it's for everybody. Who doesn't like to remember the time of growing up? The emotions are so much more intensified when we're so young and everything seems more dramatic and serious.

[Ivanaaxman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved reading this book! It’s so nicely written and the main character Lisa, though melancholic and dreamy, is also quite witty. And her fictional friend Tertius is so sweet! I enjoyed their relationship and how his story reflects hers. Overall, the novel is romantic and philosophical, however, the father character also brings comedy. What touched me most is how Lisa deals with her insecurities and fears and how much she wants to establish inner peace with her father. She certainly is a very well drawn character, very believable. I empathized with her as I was going through similar problems when I was her age. Simply lovely!

[Alice Coburn · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was such a delightful read. It soothed my heart. I loved the relationship between Lisa and Tertius, their likewise struggles and the friendship they shared! I also enjoyed the Dad and the classmate, Elijah, as they were really interesting characters. Particularly the the Dad, he is really something! His persona and the crazy ideas and dialogues made me laugh many times. I couldn't stop reading, I fell in love instantly. It stroke something within me and stays with me until now. I will definitely read this more than once.

[Eric Kaptein · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed reading this beautifully written novel.
Iva Kenaz has indeed such a way with words! And following the main character, Lisa, on her journey I could not help but empathize with her.

Reading this amazing book brought back many long forgotten memories of my youth and it certainly brought up emotions...Iva certainly understands it how to touch someone on a deeper level.

I highly recommend this book for anyone!

[Winter Sophia Rose · Rating 5 out of 5]

Witty, Sweet, Touching & Funny! A Beautiful Read!

[M.S · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was a melancholic but also surprisingly funny story. I like honest books and this one was one of those that capture the reader's heart. I was touched by it.

[Jola · Rating 5 out of 5]

A lovely story. Lisa is very interesting character and I loved reading about her experiences. Iva Kenaz is truly talented writer with great imagination.

[Karla Stojakova · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this book so much!

[Mark · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this story and related to the characters. I found that the story was interesting to read about. I related to Lisa as she was so into her book and the character Tertius had similar life problems to her. Both of them were able to relate to each other and lean on each other for help. I thought that the author did a great job with this book and it was well-written. Highly recommend it!

[Magnus · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sensitively written novel with beautiful humour and deep insights.