An Ugly World for Beautiful Boys

by Rob Costello

"An astonishing novel of discovery, heartache, and redemption. Costello writes unapologetically about surviving in a broken world against all odds. Truly unforgettable.” -Erin Entrada Kelly, two-time Newbery Medalist and National Book Award Finalist

Self-styled “beautiful boy” Toby Ryerson dreams in stardust but lives in the dirt. Haunted by the specter of his mom’s overdose, he itches for a life of fun and fabulosity far from the MAGA hats of his backwoods Adirondack town. The only problem: his older brother Jimmy’s plans to polish him into a spotless “Disney gay” with college, career, and husband. Toby knows that Jimmy didn’t sacrifice everything to raise him just so he can waste his life on men and partying like Mom did. But why can’t Jimmy see that he is their mother’s son?

When Toby outs the boy who broke his heart in a fit of rage, the web of lies he’s spun to manage Jimmy’s expectations quickly unravels. A brutal beating leads to a campaign of cyberbullying, culminating in even greater disaster.

Worse: Toby knows it’s all his own fault.

Enter Gabe, a sexy stranger from Mom’s past who seduces Toby with the keys to the Big Apple. But when Toby’s dreams of a fabulous life in the city quickly turn into a nightmare, will Jimmy's love be enough to save him, or will he end up just like Mom?

AN UGLY WORLD FOR BEAUTIFUL BOYS is a gritty and harrowing queer coming-of-age novel as well as a love story between two mismatched brothers coping with the burden of secrets and a legacy of shame.


“Rob Costello has crafted an exquisitely haunting, gorgeously-written portrait of survival and resilience with An Ugly World for Beautiful Boys. This story is necessary, especially for anyone who has ever felt alone or misunderstood. All too real, it is at once painful and gritty, yet brimming with hope and the profound power of love and understanding. Toby’s story will stay with you long after you’ve turned the last page.”

- Amber Smith, New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of The Way I Used to Be and The Way I Am Now


“Toby's coming-of-age trainwreck reads like the tensest of thrillers and hurts like your worst teenage memory. It's gorgeously written, ultimately healing, and absolutely unforgettable."

-Nancy Werlin, National Book Award Finalist for The Rules of Survival


"Gritty, lyrical, and refreshingly honest, Costello's debut novel pulses with realness, as raw and resilient as its oh-so-human protagonist. A triumph.”

-Nora Shalaway Carpenter, award-winning author of Fault Lines & The Edge of Anything


"If you’re looking for a raw, unfiltered journey into the heart of a difficult and complex queer experience, An Ugly World for Beautiful Boys is a must-read. Rob Costello has crafted an unflinching coming-of-age story that dives headfirst into the chaos of self-discovery, loss, and redemption through Toby Ryerson: an imperfect, impulsive young man who is trying to survive when everything falls apart. An unforgettable debut novel."

-Christopher Barzak, author of Stonewall Honor winning novel, Wonders of the Invisible World


"This novel shines in its exploration of the various ways masculinity manifests in the lives of young men, highlighting the damaging effects of toxic masculinity in every scenario. Costello has created multi-dimensional characters who are raw, imperfect, and utterly human. Readers will find themselves swept up in Toby’s joy, only to feel frustration when he makes mistakes… An Ugly World for Beautiful Boys is a deeply moving novel about finding self-acceptance and communal joy amidst life’s messiness."

-Samantha Hui, Independent Book Review

Genres: LGBT, Queer, Young Adult, Contemporary, Audiobook

376 pages, Paperback

First published April 1, 2025

About the author

Rob Costello (he/him) writes dark and contemporary fiction with a queer bent for and about young people. He’s the contributing editor of WE MOSTLY COME OUT AT NIGHT: 15 QUEER TALES OF MONSTERS, ANGELS & OTHER CREATURES, nominated for a 2024 Bram Stoker Award® and named a 2024 CYBILS Award Finalist as well as a Notable/Recommended/Best Book of 2024 by the New York Public Library, Ginger Nuts of Horror, PseudoPod, Reactor Magazine, and Locus Magazine. He’s also author of the dark fiction story collection THE DANCING BEARS: QUEER FABLES FOR THE END TIMES, named a finalist for The Whirling Prize. His stories have been nominated for the Pushcart Prize and have appeared in The Dark, The NoSleep Podcast, The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction, PseudoPod, Hunger Mountain, Cape Cod Review, and Narrative, among other publications.

AN UGLY WORLD FOR BEAUTIFUL BOYS is his debut novel.

An alumnus of Millay Arts, he holds an MFA in Writing from the Vermont College of Fine Arts and has served on the faculty of the Highlights Foundation since 2014. He is co-founder (with Lesa Cline-Ransome, Jo Knowles, and Jennifer Richard Jacobson) of the R(ev)ise and Shine! writing community, and he lives in upstate NY with his husband and their four-legged overlords.

Learn more at: www.cloudbusterpress.com & www.revise-and-shine.com.

Reviews

[Erin Entrada Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautiful, incredible book. Raw, authentic. A story of survival that will break your heart and mend it again. Bravo.

[Jill Ann · Rating 5 out of 5]

In Rob Costello’s AN UGLY WORLD FOR BEAUTIFUL BOYS, Toby–seventeen and beautiful in coral camisole and lime green nail polish–is unapologetically himself. Longing to escape his trailer park in Shelter Valley, his classmate’ beatings, and his older brother’s expectations, Toby dreams of a dazzling celebration of queer identity on a New York City club scene filled with electric wigs, neon makeup, and sky-high heels.

For anyone who’s longed to leap feet first into their dreams, whose mistakes might leave you stranded and stripped of innocence, for anyone who’s willing to learn the hard way that the flipside of a dream can be a brutal place populated by monsters, and for those of us who need to discover love looks different than we imagined, you’ll be aching for Toby to hang onto his beautiful curiosity about stories held in locked-up hearts, including his own.

[Rachel Yeaman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rob Costello has written a stunning book for a dark, dark time.
Toby wears his queerness proudly, longing to leave his sheltered town and straitlaced older brother, Jimmy, for the freewheeling world of EDM clubs and gender-fluid divas. But when a fling with his childhood friend, Dylan, ends in catastrophe, Tony finds himself ricocheting between Jimmy and the intriguing stranger, Gabe, while grappling with the haunting memory of his own mom’s death. Costello deftly explores the nuances of queerness, addiction, family, home, and grief without resorting to simple answers or tropes. The result is a noisy, complex, and, yes, beautiful clash of characters who’re forced to navigate a world that isn’t big or brave enough to hold them.

[Kae · Rating 5 out of 5]

Devastatingly raw, and truly a wonderful piece of writing. I understand this haunting type of story may not be for everyone, but I feel so attached to these characters and Toby feels like someone I could know in real life. I think it really captured the feelings of being a young queer person trying to figure out your place in the world, in your communities, family, chosen family, etc.. I highly recommend it.

[Christine Shestak · Rating 5 out of 5]

A powerful, multi-layered saga of one teen's journey from being alone, unloved, and misunderstood to self-acceptance and forgiveness.
The words on the page, introduce us to Toby, a teenage boy, dealing with the reality of living with a brother who has acted as his parent since their mother died. Add a layer dealing with the heartbreak of seeking his true identity as a gay teen in a community of violent homophobes, and a brother who, on the surface acts as if he's accepted Toby, but aims all his efforts at making him into a Disney Gay. Add another layer of not having anyone he trusts enough to share feelings, thoughts, or dreams. Add another layer of grief for his mother, and another of mourning the loss of his first love, and another of anger, resentment, and misunderstanding, and another of unrecognized, unresolved trauma. Frame it within an unfiltered, gritty voice, absolutely beautiful prose ("still blonde curls that resemble yellow baling wire") and hang on until Toby finally understands that "forgiveness is a river, endless, without a destination" and that" you can't throw away the people you love, no matter how much they hurt you, because they'll always be a part of you."

[S Maxfield · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was lucky enough to receive an ARC of this book, and I devoured it a day. Rob Costello perfectly captures that stifling feeling of growing up in an isolated place where the atmosphere is a pressure-cooker of rigid norms, and the price of authenticity is often to become a target. Costello deftly reveals that no one escapes the damage this environment brings. No matter how "normal" they might seem, everyone is hurting and hiding in one way or another. And, there are no easy answers. Even the allure of an escape to the big city comes with strings, consequences, and pain. In this context, Toby's resilience is even more remarkable. Yet, he’s not a saint or a symbol—or even the “Disney Gay” he thinks his brother wants him to be. He’s a messy, human, beautiful boy who deserves love—not in spite of himself—but because of exactly who he is. Unfortunately, stories like this one are needed now more than ever. Fortunately, Costello has written an unflinching, brutally generous book that makes no equivocations: no matter how messy, no matter how queer, no matter the depths of our shame, each of us is worthy of love.

[Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Toby Ryerson lives with his brother Jimmy in the Catskills of NY. Toby is a young, flamboyant, gay man. To say he sticks out in his small town is an understatement. Between trying to live his own life, and dealing with the history of his deceased mother, Toby is having a hard time. and it just gets worse. This is a great story that faces hard truths and tough situations head on. It can be an ugly world, and it can destroy you if you let it. This story takes an unvarnished look at families, histories, fears, dreams, desires, and the darker side that exists in us all. In spite of tragedies, can we find a glimmer of light?

[Shanelle Boluyt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautiful book, gorgeous writing

This author should teach a masterclass in describing setting - every place felt beautiful, gritty, ugly, real.

This is likely one of the most envelope-pushing YA books on the market. It’s also incredibly necessary. This book is real, raw, gritty, ugly… yet somehow beautiful, hopeful, and bursting with love. The characters are complicated, difficult, and real. This book made me feel things. Highly recommended.

[Jennifer Jacobson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rob Costello’s An Ugly World for Beautiful Boys is perfectly nuanced, a masterful excavation of trauma, identity, and the fragile, indomitable human heart. The characters are messy and flawed—so real you feel like you’ve known them for years—and yet they take only a nanosecond to love. (I adore Toby!) From the very first pages, Costello pulls you in not just with voice, but with a deep emotional intelligence that radiates through every scene.

In an ugly world, this is a stunningly beautiful book.

[Cody Horner · Rating 4 out of 5]

FIRST 50 PAGES: Starting to Pick Up
-Starting to relate to the main character.

MID-WAY: I'm Enjoying It!
-Connecting with the main character with my own past experiences.

ENDING: Great Ending!
-Great depiction of growing up gay in a small town and wanting to get out. And the things you will do to do it.

[Shabby -BookBistroBlog · Rating 5 out of 5]

This powerful story gate crashed my soul, a runaway train of emotions so profound, I'm still reeling. Almost nostalgic of our pimply adolescence, awkward resistance, it was too truthful and close to home to be breezed through. I took my time savoring every word, trying to decipher every sentiment so freely strewn about the story's landscape

“Simon Willow says our stories are the most precious things we own. They’re all we have and all we leave behind us. We are our stories. They are our superpower, our only power, and I’ve felt powerless for way too long.”

Heartbreaking & Heartwarming story of flawed characters, packing a powerful message of social scarring, then healing by unconditional love. this is easily “THE BEST ” book I've read this year. What surprised me the most was how the roles of some characters changed as the story progressed. Toby receives support from his least expected quarters, while some bared truth jolt him to his core.
I hurt with his pain, I cried his tears, I felt his torture, but nothing prepared me for Jimmy. I couldn't put this book down AT ALL. Read till 11 pm last night and now everywhere I go, my eyes will be searching for all the Tobys and Dylans to give a message- This Too Shall Pass
Rob writes with purity and perfection, his Toby almost aglow from within, beautiful soul too busy chasing a fantasy, he almost glides over the muck beneath his feet. He is instantly affable and adorable.

“The rules were fucked up for beautiful boys”

Reading a book about a demographic completely detached from your personal existence, gives you a 4th dimensional perspective you never knew existed before. But struggling existential crisis in any shape or form, by any age group, or anywhere in the world, carries the same tone of acute anguish & despair, compelling my reader heart to reach in the pages and just hug Toby Reyrson. A small person with large dreams, completely blinding his eyesight with grandeur of Ravisha Mann and her kingdom of New York.

“Manntasia was just a taste, a distant glimpse of sky from the bottom of the deep, black well that was my life in Shelter Valley. Our shithole town was too small to contain me forever, and so was my brother. I’d find a way to climb out and reach the sunlight someday. I refused to fall back into darkness here.”

Invisible shackles of poverty, socio-economic segregation and classism pile on top of his colourful soul of a butterfly, desperate to spread his wings to fly in his world, where his love crush on his friend Dylan is reciprocated. Ever since his mother passed away, his untethered life is drifting aimlessly. Though his ever supportive brother Jimmy, neighbour Rozella are encouraging him to step on the path of salvation through education.
But all he wants is to be loved in his own skin.

“Put my head down, disappear into the closet, mute the volume on being me. I’d watched Dylan melt into the background often enough to learn the technique. You just needed to crumple your true self into a ball and shove it in your pocket until the coast was clear and you could smooth yourself out again.”

It's easier dreamt than materialized in backward town full of dogmas and blocked brains, red-capped with virtual bigotry, homophobia and xenophobia.
In short, his fate is sealed. Unless an angel Gabriel is sent to bring him from shadows to light.
Illusiory Gabe Fournier wears that mask and drags him to greener pastures.
But then the elevator starts to descend...and how!!
First of all, I need to mention something here. Toby is indeed the central character and story is told in his POV, but Jimmy is the one controlling the narrative, from chapter one.
He NEVER assumes control, But always IN control of his life and Toby's. And to a point Gabe's too!!
The tragic backdrop of his mother's death when he was a child, his comprehension scope being too small to make sense of it, makes him lash out at the world like a typical teen without understanding the circumstances surrounding it. But he IS 17, so justifiable in his tantrum of stalking “Marsh Trail. A holy trinity of Sodom, Gomorrah and San Francisco” .
A case study in Oppositional Defiant Disorder & Self Abasement.
But he is just a child!! And that's why I bawled my eyes out at his torment chapter and chapter again.
Ah!! His physical abuse and verbal degradation had me curled up to bear his hits.

“ Rolling with blatant homophobia has become as much a part of my daily routine as lamenting the sorry state of dental hygiene in Kayoga County.”

Rob writes this in-depth account of David-Ian child fighting Goliath of the world, in every small town, trailer park, podunk place that progress forgot. Any boy who wears silk camisoles and makeup and dreams of bedazzled Utopia just within the reach of his dream-filled fingertips, every Toby and Dylan anywhere is who we need to reach and accept. This book is more of a lesson for adults who need to get out of their comfort zones and see/read/learn to see every colour, creed and orientation with open eyes.
Although the setting is somewhat hopelessly dismal, Toby's sunshine personality keeps the story tone light and frothy. The best part was his sensibility amidst it all. He is supremely intelligent so nowhere was the plot cheesy. Just unfortunate, but never unrelatable or unbelievable. We need more beautiful souls like Toby & Tiago, I DEFINITELY need a Jimmy in MY life, who NEVER EVER gave up on Toby.

“I may be damaged goods, but I'm here”

Oh My Lanta!! The tears are flowing freely, heart is full and there's a huge smile on my face at the end. If this is his debut novel, I'm completely in awe of this prolific writers ability to move me so. I now have an author who I can look forward to reading and that has made my year!
“5 Glorious stars for Walking Billboard For a Good Time”
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[Louis (audiobookfanatic) · Rating 5 out of 5]

An Ugly World for Beautiful Boys is a gritty, unapologetically honest queer coming-of-age novel. The story follows Toby, a flamboyant 17-year-old in backwoods Shelter Valley, who lives under the shadow of his mother’s promiscuous legacy and death by overdose and the weight of his brother Jimmy’s expectations. When he outs an ex and faces a brutal assault, he is rescued by an older man from his mother’s past, Gabe. Soon they form a bond, and he elopes to NYC with Gabe, where the world is much uglier than he envisioned.

The story is beautifully written, with raw, fresh prose brimming with emotional intensity. The story is told from the POV of protagonist Toby, who narrates his experiences with a stubborn tenacity that is equally infuriating, refreshing, and captivating. In many instances, he speaks directly to his dead mother and confides in her as if she’s listening and can offer him comfort and guidance—this makes the narrative even more compelling and powerful, especially given his mother’s sordid past and the shameful legacy she left Toby with. The interesting chapter titles reflect the situation or setting Toby finds himself in and are just as poetic as the thematic prose itself.

The characters are all flawed and multi-dimensional in this story. Toby is an unapologetically messy protagonist that readers will root for despite his brash, impulsive nature, which often leads him into trouble. Having lived with a shameful family legacy from his dead mother’s sexual promiscuity and drug overdose, he’s decided that he really has nothing left to lose and expresses himself authentically with no regrets. His mother’s horrific last moments have still scarred him, but being so young at the time, he doesn’t remember much about her or what she was like and wants answers. His tumultuous relationship with his brother, who has very different visions for Toby’s future, is a central focus of the narrative. Both brothers are broken in different ways, but there is an underlying love between them that transcends their differences and all their trauma and shame. Toby’s heated love affair with an older man, Gabe, has red flags written all over it from the get-go, and the grueling experiences later on that force him to accept that love is much different than he imagined are thought-provoking and engrossing!

The story has many powerful messages, including unexpectedly losing one’s innocence and accepting the brutal reality of the world. This is not a story for the faint of heart, but it’s one that will resonate with anyone who’s learned the difficult lessons of making unhealthy, impulsive choices that led to far-reaching consequences. Costello also cleverly explores the nuances of being queer, the dangers of untreated depression and addiction, family conflict, and long-buried grief—all through the multi-layered narrative.

The backwoods small-town setting is the perfect backdrop for the story—the judgment and gossip take us back to more backward times, but it’s also a stark reminder that these places still exist today—and being your authentic self in such places often makes you a target. This makes the allure of escape to big cities commonplace for queer youth, but it often comes with extreme challenges and a different form of isolation.

Overall, An Ugly World for Beautiful Boys is a gripping story delving into the complexities of family trauma, identity, grief, and accepting everything that can’t be controlled. In our current “ugly world,” stories like this one are more important than ever. Toby’s and his brother’s arcs show us that no matter how ugly someone’s circumstances and desperate they become, there’s always hope, and everyone is worthy of love. If you’re looking for your next powerful coming-of-age tale with profound messages and raw, relatable characters, then grab a copy of the book ASAP! You’ll find yourself unable to put this one down and desperate to find peace and resolution for the characters!

Narrator Performance (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️.5)

The audiobook of An Ugly World For Beautiful Boys is an emotionally intense listen narrated by talented actor and narrator Myles Dabbs. Dabbs brings protagonist Toby vividly to life with an unapologetic defiance that is gripping and comes across as very authentic. Dabbs provides very distinct character voices that are easy to distinguish and match each character’s attitude and age.

The dialogue scenes between Toby and Gabe are infused with a seductive energy that makes their chemistry palpable. When Gabe’s true colors are revealed, Gabbs shifts his performance of the characters, and the result is even more compelling—raw and uncomfortable-sounding dialogue that is convincing and compelling.

The narration is well paced, and the sequences where Toby speaks to his dead mother are particularly captivating and emotionally charged, causing listeners to empathize with Toby. Overall, Dabbs’ performance becomes more powerful and engrossing as the story unfolds, and for this reason it’s a great idea to pair a physical copy of the book with the audiobook for a fully immersive experience!

[John Payton · Rating 2 out of 5]

One might think that this sort of book is not my cup of tea ... and one would be right. Not because I'm straight and CIS, but because I've reached an age where I find much more in common with the adults in a book, than with the teenagers. I found Toby just plain annoying, and remarkably unaware considering how often he self-reflects in the narrative. Found myself thinking, "listen to your elders, you little punk!" way too often.

The overall plot is very similar to older stories about young women being seduced into the sleazy culture of the Big City - the author has merely changed the gender of the protagonist.

That being said, I was impressed with Dabb's narration. He differentiates very well between character voices and attitudes (with the possible exception of the sleazy older guys in the nightclub; they seemed to blend together -- perhaps on purpose). I had some minor questions about pacing, and look forward to speaking with Myles about his process and techniques.

Overall, I didn't hate it, I'm just aged out of the target audience.

[Allyson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic read with a fully realized protagonist and incredible sense of place. Toby's voice reminds me of Holden Caufield, Adam Farmer (Cormier's I Am the Cheese), and even Sal Paradise (Kerouac's On the Road). His voice will stay with me for a long time. Costello weaves a powerful web of local color, sounds, and spaces that feel foreign and familiar all at once. I've seen the swimming hole. I've been to the Dollar Tree--felt that gravel beneath my sneakers and stared at the shattered glass in the parking lot. I've never stood in Toby's shoes but they feel familiar all the same.

I stayed up way too late reading because I had to make sure Toby found some sort of peace and resolution.

[Darrell Grizzle · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a queer coming-of-age novel that reads like a crime thriller. It's gritty and tough and the main character, a gay teenager who longs to break free of his rural community, is sometimes hard to root for. But it's a page-turner and well worth reading. I became a fan of Rob Costello when I read his short story “Whatever Happened to the Boy Who Fell Into the Lake?” in The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction (July/August 2021). This new novel is just as beautiful and painful to read as that story was. I look forward to seeing more novels and stories from this very talented writer.

[Heather Lee · Rating 5 out of 5]

A poignant and authentic look at self-styled "beautiful boy," Toby, as he maneuvers a world that seems hell-bent on stifling his beauty. Each character feels achingly real and the darkness of the world around them presses down on the reader through the pages. Toby is so self-aware and yet, so naïve that your heart breaks for him even as you scream at his choices. His survival and redemption almost become your own. Language, setting, pacing, voice- all masterfully crafted.

[Jonathan Kastin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is for the messy queers, the ones who make mistakes and don't fit into the safe boxes others want them to fit into. It's for the kids who get taken advantage of and abused by the adults who should protect them, but still manage to find their way out of the dark woods and into a better story of their own making.

[Dan Clay · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a remarkable, powerful, original, necessary book. I don't even know where to begin! I admire so deeply how complex and three-dimensional all of the characters are. I understand all of them, and their motivations only get more nuanced and true-to-life as the story progresses. I was profoundly moved by the relationship between the brothers, how it progressed over the course of the novel, and Toby has one of the most moving, authentic "coming of age" narratives I've ever read.

The writing is awe-inspiring! My book is dog-eared and underlined to the hilt, profound quotes and perfect scene-setting abound, and I'll share one of my favorite lines: "Some people convince themselves they're too broken to be fixed." Tragically true, and this is a book full of people figuring out how they can all help fix each other, and even realizing there's less to "fix" than they at first assumed.

What a reading experience! I'll cherish it forever.

[Marty Webb · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars rounded down. There were no surprised in this book but the line about being strung out on benedryl and to find ppl still having Percocet in 2016 made this feel I was reading a cautionary afterschool special, rather than something that was real.

[Ema · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is crazy and so so so dark. Raw and real. I have so many feelings.