Mid-Faith Crisis: Finding a Path Through Doubt, Disillusionment, and Dead Ends

by Catherine McNiel, Jason Hague

Navigating the Understanding the Crisis of Faith

Many of us embarked on our spiritual journeys filled with hope and certainty, only to find ourselves questioning the very foundation of our beliefs as life unfolded. The faith that once seemed unshakeable may falter in the face of broken trust, unanswered prayers, and the harsh realities of worldly suffering. But you're not alone—mid-faith crises are a shared human experience that can feel isolating yet are a crucial part of our spiritual journey.

In Mid-Faith Crisis, authors Catherine McNiel and Jason Hague provide a compassionate exploration of this challenging phase. With backgrounds in theology and personal narratives of their own spiritual upheavals, they guide readers through the complex landscape of doubt and disillusionment. Mid-Faith Crisis candidly addresses the often-unspoken realities of faith's evolution, offering solace and practical insights for navigating through turbulent waters.

Through storytelling and reflection, McNiel and Hague offer practices and disciplines that help reclaim what is genuine and discard what is not. They reassure us that the crisis of faith is not an endpoint but a transformative stage that can lead to a more sincere and robust belief system. If you're in the midst of a spiritual reevaluation, Mid-Faith Crisis will serve as a beacon of hope, reminding us that while the road may be rocky, the destination holds the promise of deeper faith and connection.

"Chaplain McNiel (Fearing Bravely) and pastor Hague (Aching Joy) deliver an approachable guide to tackling crises of faith. They trace how even strong religious identities can be dismantled by life challenges or new perspectives, resulting in a 'death of faith' that leaves believers feeling lost and isolated. Arguing that this uncomfortable stage can be a productive period in one’s spiritual journey, the authors unpack how readers can harness feelings of betrayal to seek new “heroes of faith”—often those quietly doing good away from the spotlight—and use their doubts to create a more honest, intimate relationship with God." – Publishers Weekly Review, February 2025

Genres: Christian, Nonfiction, Christian Living, Faith, Christianity, Christian Non Fiction

190 pages, Kindle Edition

Published June 3, 2025

Reviews

[Catherine McNiel · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best books I've ever written. 🙂

[Whitney Dziurawiec · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wish I had this book three years ago, but having it now is such a gentle validation. I'm a little speechless at how good it is. if you're a person of faith, you should read this. if you're in ministry, you NEED to read this. preferably the audiobook because the authors' voices are brimming with such grace, gentleness, and care I cannot imagine the written book being better. There isn't a trite word in the whole book and every truth is clearly hard-won by the authors. no spiritual word salads, no pithy Bible verses, so much care.

easily one of the best modern Christian spirituality books I've ever read.

[Maree Walker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jason and Catherine were both raised in very different churches, with very different experiences. One thing they had in common: both experienced a crisis of faith, and they share how that shaped them at the time, and through to now. They both had experiences that seemed to contradict what they learned about God, and living with faith, and neither was prepared for the struggles they would face.

The authors share vulnerably, and I particularly related to Catherine's story of church hurt. I'll let you read that story for yourself (no spoilers), but she did have a really difficult time returning to church afterwards. Rather than the usual rhetoric of, "but you should get back to church asap," I've become accustomed to, the authors express deep empathy for those who've experienced hurt at the hands of their church. They offer that a person should not feel obligated to return unless they are ready, which realistically may be not at all.

The book covers a broad range of struggles that could start a mid-faith crisis, several of which I've experienced myself; but it also opened my eyes to other ways people are led to question their faith, that I hadn't considered. Jason's struggle with faith while employed as a pastor for example, was not something I'd thought about, and highlights how nobody is immune to a faith crisis.

My favourite aspects of the book: the end of each chapter includes a practice, with questions for reflection, to consider how the topic of the chapter is relevant in our own lives and how it has affected our faith. The authors also recommend relevant books to read and songs to listen to. I particularly appreciated the grace and gentleness in which the authors handled the heavy subject matter; it was encouraging without even a whiff of spiritual bypassing. There is a regular acknowledgement that life is difficult and uncertain, but that uncertainty can eventually bring comfort if we allow ourselves to lean into it.

Final note: make sure you read the epilogue.

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rarely have I encountered such vulnerable, honest, and powerful truth-telling in a book about faith. Written with the tenderest care, shepherding all of us who have found ourselves in the wilderness of a faith that lacks easy answers or reeling from the pain of a church that failed to meet expectations, this book is a must read. Whether you are newly exploring faith or have followed the way of Jesus for years, I guarantee this book has words of wisdom or healing for you or someone you know.

[Andrea Holme · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mid-Faith Crisis is the long-awaited, much-needed talk with a friend over coffee about the real doubts and questions Christians face. Catherine and Jason invite you into their own moments of pain and crisis, and sit with you as you look at your own. And they deliver hope in each chapter. Not shiny false promises, but gritty HOPE - pointing back to the First Love as the source of goodness that follows us even as we question how good He is.

[Jonathan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was so good. It helped with questions I had and questions I didn’t know I had and left me feeling much more hopeful—and grace-caught—than when I started. This book meets you where you actually are, not where you pretend to be on Sunday mornings.

[Hannah Comerford · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been in the "deconstruction" place for a while, but I found this book to be a true comfort in a way I haven't really seen before. The authors reminded me that this is a normal part of spiritual growth, not an abnormality that you get through after one bad experience. They didn't force you to make a decision about your spiritual life one way or the other, instead acknowledging that you might end up in a different place than they did. They addressed prayer and the painful realities of finding a new understanding of it during a crisis. They made me feel seen.

I highly recommend this book not just for those going through a mid-faith crisis, but also for ministers and others in the church to know how to better sit with others as they go through this season. Because if people are going to grow in their faith, they're going to have to face a mid-faith crisis.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book spoke to me right where I am, in the height of a mid-faith crisis.
It affirmed my hurts, made me cry in the best ways, and gave me hope that things won't always be this way.
The only part of this book with which I patently disagree is the progressive Christianity inserted into the dialogue, and I do not accept this at all.
However, I am not throwing out the baby with the bath water. The rest of the book was very helpful and insightful, and I made lots of highlights.

[Ali Batir · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you have ever felt like you've hit a wall in your faith journey, been whiplashed by doubt, or felt lost in a sea of dissolution, then this book is a salve for your wounds. I've read a lot of books on deconstruction, church hurt, etc but Mid-Faith Crisis is the one I would recommend out of them all. It's not in your face. Its not angry. It isn't pushing some sort of vendetta. It's honest and it's raw but on top of that: it's hopeful. 5 stars from this deconstructioner.

[Crystal · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was looking for a book about crises in faith, to learn more about why faith falters. I borrowed this book from my public library. It took a long time to read it because it gave me so much to think about. However, it's written in a way that draws the reader in and engages you, mind and spirit. Each chapter ends with thought-provoking questions, a short list of songs to listen to, and a short list of other books for further reading. I loved this book so much that as soon as I finished it, I ordered a copy to own so I can refer to it again and again. It helped me to understand more why faith ebbs and flows, to realize that even giants in the faith had questions and doubts, and it gave me hope that those I love whose faith is currently shaky at best will not ultimately be lost - that questions can be a way for faith to ultimately grow.

[Elizabeth Riendeau · Rating 5 out of 5]

I just love this book. What a gift to the soul.

[Nicole Rickert · Rating 5 out of 5]

Required reading for everyone who follows Jesus.

Gentle, intentional, and practical, McNiel and Hague invite us in to their stories of disillusionment and doubt to create a safe and gentle space to wrestle with questions and experience grace as we make our way through the dark seasons of life and faith.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ve been in the church my whole life. I’ve held ministry roles as a youth leader, started a ministry for adults in their 20s-30s, led small groups for couples who were parenting school age kids, and now I pastor a congregation. In this book, Catherine and Jason do a beautiful job outlining the natural progression of faith development and one I’ve observed as I’ve done ministry among many ages and stages over the years.

Their goal is to specifically examine the Mid-Faith Crisis. Maybe you’re in this space now? Maybe you love someone who is in this space?

Catherine and Jason serve as friendly guides helping to name and normalize this experience. They also offer hope of what can happen on the other side if we navigate this crisis well. Questions are welcomed. Doubts are treated with gentleness and respect. Wounds are tended with care.

[Trey Meadows · Rating 5 out of 5]

Probably the best book I’ll read in 2025.

[Cara Meredith · Rating 4 out of 5]

A nice co-author mashup that tackles a topic the church needs to be talking about more.

[Charmaine · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book to be gentle and helpful. It gives the reader permission to have doubts - without worrying that doubts will kill faith altogether. There is much mystery to the Christian faith. Not every question can be answered - especially the "why" questions. This book helps the reader learn to live with the mystery and be ok with just a mustard seed of faith. We can trust God to keep us in the palm of His hand and never leave or forsake us - even in our low-faith seasons.

[Paul Nunn · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is excellent, timely, and important. So many of us have been wrestling with disorientation or disappointment in our faith and asking questions like, do I still believe this? Why did the lights go out? Or even, what’s wrong with the Christians? This book helps reassure us that we’re not alone in the asking, and we’re not crazy. There are no cheap answers offered here, just honest reflection and hard won insight.

[April Yamasaki · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mid-Faith Crisis is deeply personal as the authors trace their respective stories of faith and struggle. It respectfully shares the experience of others confronting doubt, church harm, fallen heroes, and struggles with prayers that seem to go nowhere, with relentless suffering, with the collapse of long-held beliefs and feelings that fade. And most of all, their book points us beyond crisis to a deeper faith, by redefining faith, reimagining safe community, seeking spiritual companionship, and more.

[Jeanne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Feeling alone in your doubts and questions? Book includes excellent resources and questions to navigate this journey. Reform your faith and transform your life.

[Ashley McNeese]

So good ❤️

[Bob · Rating 4 out of 5]

Summary: When the foundations of one’s faith are shaken, it appears an endpoint, but may be a transforming experience.

You are the daughter of a pastor in a small town. Church was a wonderful place until it wasn’t, when dad was dismissed from his position and the family had to leave town on two week’s notice. Or you entered pastoral ministry after appearing on a national Christian television show and “stole the show.” But real life has been hard. A child with health difficulties, a bout with depression, and the untimely deaths of two friends. Combine that with disillusionment with the state of the church in your country. How does one write sermons when you are no longer sure of the things you are writing?

Those, in short, are the stories of the two authors of this book. Church hurt, disillusionment, existential doubt. While there are many paths, a number named in this book, to mid-faith crisis, the authors of this book write as fellow travelers. The question is, what does one do when the faith, once so central, no longer seems to address the challenges in one’s life? Or what does one do when that faith is a source of emotional pain, associated with hurtful experiences?

The authors begin by talking about stages of faith, that faith may grow and change as we do. The four they identify are inherited faith, confident faith, mid-faith crisis, and conscious faith. The latter emerges out of mid-faith crises, and usually at mid-life or later. It’s marked by a sense of coming home, finding peace, living with mystery and complexity.

But how does one move through the darkness of mid-faith crisis? Is it possible to emerge from this, not with a lost faith but a deeper one? Part Two of this book, “The Crisis” addresses the different forms of crises people most commonly experience. They address doubt, moving from intellectual uncertainty to relational trust and faithfulness. They address church hurt and stress the importance of naming the harms. But then the decision is one of courage, to trust even a few with these hurts, even if this doesn’t happen in a formal church structure. They explore when our heroes fall, betraying trust; when prayers fall silent; overwhelming suffering; the collapse of belief; the fading of feelings.

There are no glib answers. Often the question is moving from what one thought faith and the Christian life was like, beyond the tingles and the good feelings, to waiting, to trusting in the absence of feeling, to hanging on because the alternative is the abyss. The authors conclude with inviting us to exchange greatness for goodness. The crisis of faith really challenges our false conceptions of a great life, great church, great leaders, great experiences with God. Conscious faith is one without the illusions, where we recognize God’s quiet, hidden presence in a messed up world, and learn to walk in imperfect love, wandering steps and slow, in communities of flawed people like us slowly changing into the likeness of Jesus.

I appreciate the honesty of the authors throughout. We see how they are still on the way. For example, they offer no quick fixes to church hurt. Catherine still struggles with safety and acceptance in the church. But she still chooses community. She trusts friends with her struggle. Furthermore, the authors treat mid-faith crisis as a developmental step, not an aberration. They point to a faith for the second half of life, the opportunity to grow deeper rather than drop out.

_______________________

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received a complimentary copy of this book from the publisher for review.

[Kristi Rice · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am so grateful for this book! It is beautiful, helpful, refreshing. I appreciate that the authors share vulnerably from their own lives with many personal examples of crises that caused questions and disillusionment. They burst the myth that it is wrong or unusual to go through a crisis of faith. Reading it feels like a good helpful talk with a good friend, and actually gives hope that even though those crises don’t go away, there is hope to carry on while also being honest and real.

The first section of the book gives some helpful frameworks for typical stages of our lives and how we inherit or develop our faith. I appreciated the frameworks, even though each person has a unique story and may experience the stages in a different order or way. Then the book moves to those crises in life that can shake or destroy the faith that we found comfort in. I was so grateful to see the honest and personal example of the painful experiences, cognitive dissonance, or failures of leaders and heroes that can send us into a tailspin and cause us to question what we were so certain of before. I especially appreciated the concept that FAITH is different from CERTAINTY, and that mature faith in God recognizes that there is some ambiguity and mystery to our faith, and that we might not always have the answers. But that does not mean that we have lost our faith entirely.

One added thing I liked about the book was the practical action steps and the suggested songs to listen to and additional reading at the end of each chapter. A nice touch – you can have a soundtrack to fit the topics in the book!

[Quist · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked up this book several weeks ago on the new books shelf at Knox College Library at the University of Toronto. I frequent the display and in this case, thought this book would be worth reading, given the topic, length and publisher. For a decade or more I've been surrounded by people in the GenX category who have jettisoned their faith or have radically deconstructed it with out much reformation. More to the point, of late this observation has come very close to home in terms of my church family and friends.

The book covers most of the usual topics, starting with the premise of the two ideas of:

a. How did your faith journey start?
b. How's it going now?

The opening chapters were not that well written, yet did serve as a good introduction to the idea that a mid-life faith crisis is in fact a common phase given the experience of many both now and going back through the history of the church.

Things went in a ho-hum way until I read the chapter addressing prayer. Along the common line of questioning: When we pray why does it seem as if God/no one is listening? This chapter alone is worth the price of the book. From a pastoral perspective, it's the best short essay I've ever read addressing this problem when it comes to prayer. Specifically that the teaching we receive from the church is way off when it comes to the experience of the sincere and intentional believer.

In answering the questions which surround doubt and uncertainty, I think the authors bring out broadly speaking a new posture to deal with this difficult and common experience in the life of most Xians.

I recommend the read.

[Tim · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mid-faith crisis is all about Christians who go though a crisis or series of trials and as a result backslide or even completely lose their faith in God. But eventually God brings them back to faith. In this book the two authors describe in detail their own crisis of faith. in the first part of the book. Then chapter after chapter they tackle various issues that cause us to lose our faith and how to recover from each of them including: Church damage, fallen heroes, silent prayers, suffering, failed beliefs, and when feelings fade. Each of these topics was concluded with a way out or a way forward and resources to consult. The book concluded with a sort of "resurrection" to a new faith.
It was a deeper read than I expected and what made it powerful was the various stories from the authors. I felt like the final part could have been more developed more which was basically a short chapter. But possibly this was because each previous chapter revealed how the authors came out of the crisis.
Also, I felt like it was assumed that EVERYONE has to go through this kind of disaster in their life. A lot of people do, but that is not always true. They don't say that, but it seemed to be under the surface.
I loved the Epilogue in which Jason shares a final wonderful testimony.

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book has some wonderful encouragement and hope for Christians in a faith crisis. It’s so reassuring to see doubt and struggle treated as a normal part of the Christian walk - even after reaching adulthood and/or spiritual maturity - rather than a sign of weakness. It’s even more reassuring to hear that it can end in a closer relationship with God. I appreciated the authors’ vulnerability in sharing their stories.

There are a few claims in the book that struck me as not quite Biblical. Granted, one of my struggles is that my life experience doesn’t always match up with what the Bible says, though I wish it did (e.g., unanswered prayers for suffering family members and friends), but I’ve experienced enough of God to know that Christianity must be true and that I want to trust the Bible.

This book doesn’t provide easy answers, but it provides solidarity and hope. For that, I am very thankful. This book is going to stay with me a long time. I give it 4.5 stars rounded up to 5.

Thank you to NetGalley and InterVarsity Press for the free eARC. I post this review with my honest opinions.

[Christy Suerth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mid-Faith Crisis is a profoundly moving book for anyone struggling with the pain inflicted by the very institution meant to help and to heal – the church. If you've ever felt hurt by the church, like I have been, this book is for you.

Catherine McNiel and her co-author, Jason Hague, guided me through healing from dark seasons of disappointment:

- Pastor misconduct (a terrible season we endured at my last home church in Chicagoland).
- Church leadership failures (another season of pain at another church home).
- Church disconnection from real-world issues (my current church home is being silent when we need to hear the truth in this time of division, confusion, and pain).

McNiel and Hague share powerful and personal stories, insightful reflections, and practical activities to help you:

- Process pain and disillusionment.
- Reconnect with the God who was, is and always will be Good.
- Find healing and hope.

I highly recommend Mid-Faith Crisis to anyone experiencing this dark season. Don't let human errors distract you from the perfect love of God.

[Marissa Burt · Rating 5 out of 5]

This timely and refreshing book invites Christians to see things like disillusionment and doubt as natural, and even inevitable, elements of faith formation.

With candor and vulnerability, Catherine McNiel and Jason Hague share their own encounters with doubt, "church hurt," betrayal, moral injury, and other threads that will be familiar to Christians, particularly those deconstructing or struggling to hold onto faith. These touchpoints help reframe difficult faith moments as opportunities for curiosity. McNiel's and Hague's pastoral sensibilities keep their authorial voice respectful and expansive, positioning themselves as fellow companions and allowing readers their spiritual agency. Each chapter ends with questions to explore, suggested playlists (a nice feature!), and further recommended reading.

This is a must-read for people in pastoral ministry—both to shape their understanding and to have on hand as a recommendation.

[Dave · Rating 5 out of 5]

Asking key questions about your faith can come at any time in one's journey. For McNiel, the questions started as a tween when a church treated her family horribly. Hague was later when key figures in his religious circle showed just how far their words and their actions differed. Both were honest about their new normal that has developed.

The book includes resources for listening and reading to help people to interact with their loss, placing them in a path for growth. A section for spiritual practices is included as well.

The book is one that I have waited to see since reading the Advance Reader Copy. The title would make for a great starting place for people to rebuild from wherever they are in their path. It is one that I will keep on the shelf for years to come.

[Prasanta Verma · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a book I've needed for years as I've wrestled with my own journey. The authors offer us a glimpse into their own stories and journeys and speak freely about their own questions and doubts. They offer us a framework for understanding the stages this journey takes by naming four different phases of the process and the characteristics of each phase. (I also appreciated the word "demolition" in the epilogue-an apt descriptor!) I appreciate the naming of the betrayals many of us have experienced and the times of wilderness. I will be recommending this to friends who are walking similar journeys.

[Amber Riggs · Rating 5 out of 5]

Despite being common, crises of faith carry a stigma. Mid-Faith Crisis aims to cut through the fear, confusion, and disorientation of such a crisis. Catherine and Jason point to a way forward and demonstrate how crises of faith often result in a deepened faith instead of a shallower one. I appreciate their candidness regarding their own journeys with Jesus.

This is a valuable resource both for people who are experiencing a crisis of faith and for the people journeying alongside them.