Su Legado

by James C. Dobson

Vivimos en una cultura que trata de destruir la fe embrionaria de nuestros hijos y guiarlos a una ideología políticamente correcta, a sistemas de creencias ateas, y a tanta inmoralidad que habría conmocionado a las generaciones anteriores. A esto es que se enfrentan los padres cristianos de hoy en día, y muchos de ellos están aterrorizados de ello. Vivimos en tiempos realmente peligrosos. Pero la buena noticia es que hay una manera en la cual usted puede salir victorioso de esta batalla por los corazones, mentes y almas de nuestros preciosos hijos. Sea cual sea la etapa en la que se encuentre como padre o abuelo, usted puede dejar un legado espiritual que equipará a sus hijos y nietos con un patrimonio de fe inquebrantable. SU LEGADO le ofrece las respuestas presentándole: La historia personal del Dr. Dobson de su propio legado espiritual; Las estrategias para la formación espiritual de los niños; La ayuda para padres de hijos pródigos; La esperanza de alcanzar a los padres que no han sido salvos; Los principios para desarrollar una relación de amor con sus hijos; Los testimonios de padres que lo han hecho bien; Las historias que puede contarles a sus hijos y dejarles su legado; Los pasos que puede tomar para llevar a su hijo a Cristo ¿Cómo le puede enseñar a sus hijos lo que más importa? Es siendo intencional sobre su formación espiritual. SU LEGADO le ayudará a hacer que esa sea la prioridad central de su familia.

Genres: Christian, Parenting, Nonfiction

255 pages, Paperback

First published September 1, 2014

About the author

A licensed psychologist and marriage, family, and child counselor, Dr. James Dobson was a clinical member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. For 14 years Dr. Dobson was an associate clinical professor of pediatrics at the University of Southern California School of Medicine, and he served for 17 years on the attending staff of Children's Hospital Los Angeles in the Division of Child Development and Medical Genetics. He earned a Ph.D. from the University of Southern California (1967) in the field of child development.

He was the author of more than 50 books, including The New Dare to Discipline, The New Strong-Willed Child, When God Doesn't Make Sense, Night Light: A Devotional for Couples, Bringing Up Boys, and the New York Times bestseller Bringing Up Girls .

Heavily involved in influencing governmental policies related to the family, Dr. Dobson was appointed by President Ronald Reagan to the National Advisory Commission to the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention. He also served on the Attorney General's Advisory Board on Missing and Exploited Children, the Department of Health and Human Services' Panel on Teen Pregnancy Prevention, and the Commission on Child and Family Welfare. He was elected in 2008 to the National Radio Hall of Fame, and in 2009 received the Ronald Reagan Lifetime Achievement Award.

Reviews

[Glenita50 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Every parent and grandparent should read this book,regardless what age their kids are.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love James Dobson books. This one doesn't disappoint. Loved reading about his family and the importance of raising your kids to want to be followers of Jesus! He says it's the most important thing as a parent---I couldn't agree more.

[Sharon Richardson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Have you thought about the most important legacy you will leave your children and grandchildren? You should read this book by James Dobson. He has a wonderful gift of writing and story telling that helps to guide us in laying the foundation of faith in those we love.

[Courtney Lyman · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great reminder that we are in a spiritual battle and we need to actively pass on our Christian heritage to our children.

[Bonita Jewel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Terrific and life-challenging book on the importance of living in such a way that our children will receive the greatest legacy possible. Definitely recommend it for parents with children of any age.

[Donnelly · Rating 1 out of 5]

First of all, I want to put out here that I'm never going to agree with Dobson on most any matter. I am what he would call a prodigal -- and a Catholic prodigal, to boot. I was raised vaguely Catholic, with a religious maternal side and an agnostic paternal side. When Dobson talks about preaching the faith and bring the light of God into someone's life, I'm simply never going to agree with them.

That said, I can still appreciate religion. As previously stated, my mother's side is Catholic. My grandmother still works at her local church, and I would consider myself a lapsed Catholic. I can understand the concept of faith, I simply do not believe.

Now, this book. Okay. This book is....bad. I imagine it didn't go through much of an editing process, since even with my breakneck reading speed, I noticed several typos throughout the book that could have easily been caught, especially since it's not a particularly long read. The writing style is very familial, in a way that doesn't feel earned, especially not to someone who's never read any of his other books. He writes like he knows the reader personally, and seems to make a lot of assumptions about them.

As is unfortunately expected, the entire book is seeped in a very conservative worldview. I believe that it's entirely possible for a Christian, or indeed someone of any faith, to hold liberal or even truly leftist ideologies, but this book showcases the nastier side of the Christian Right, while still painting itself as almost saccharinely sweet. Chapter Four devolves numerous times into only vaguely-related tangents on the immorality of abortion as a sign of the 'degeneration' of the modern culture, at one point bringing up the unfortunately racist legacy of Planned Parenthood as if it is representative of all of the pro-choice movement. I wonder how Dobson would respond to similar accusations about the past and still ongoing racism of various denominations and specific churches, such as the abhorrently loud Westboro Baptists. (He also manages to throw a dig at Catholics for being on 'the right side' for once in their anti-abortion stance. Again, the Catholic side of my family remains firmly pro-choice.)

There is also a throughline of women being constantly subservient to their husbands. I was surprised to read on page two that Dobson's great-grandmother never referred to her husband by his given name, 'of course,' as if I as the reader am supposed to naturally understand that a wife will not refer to her husband by his *legal name.* His mother is portrayed as somehow betraying the faith by not wanting to marry a preacher, and she is only 'given credit' when she '[gives] her heart to the Lord and stands beside her husband in Christ.' I do not believe that faith is explicitly sexist, but many practitioners do seem to be.

It's also remarkably...not quite pretentious, but very overly dramatic, bringing religion into just about everything. Again, for an explicitly Christian work, I shouldn't be surprised, but when Dobson talks about a grave plot for his great-grandfather being 'holy ground' or an assurance that his line will always be religious as a 'prophecy', I am reminded that we are from two incredibly different spheres.

The chapters up until now were mainly biographical, which is why I have relatively little to say about them. From now on, I will be reviewing chapter by chapter.

There is an entire chapter devoted to 'apologetics for kids,' and I must admit that such a phrase is why I bought the book in the first place. I wanted to see how Dobson would justify essentially indoctrinating his children into faith the same way he claims that society is indoctrinating them out of it, and...there's nothing. Really, there's no real justification as to why you need to raise your children to be Christians outside of a vague conceptualisation that they might turn out 'wrong' if they don't. A child does not need to be 'trained' in faith, they need to be taken care of and loved. If you're a Christian and you raise your children to be Christians, that's fine, but you need to understand two things. One, they are their own people, not extensions of you. Two, they rely on you for unconditional love and support.

For an example of how to do this poorly, I will point to Chapter Eight. A large portion of Chapter Eight deals with the story of Zach Windsor, the child of two Christians who went off to college and engaged in 'unsavoury' activities. As an outsider, I can obviously not diagnose Zach, but from the text given, he seemed to be struggling with substance abuse, and likely depression as well. When I went to college, I was on my own for the first time in my life, and I became suicidal. I didn't do the work that was assigned to me, and fell into an Internet addiction since it was the only thing that brought me joy. While my parents didn't handle the situation perfectly, they understood that I was seventeen/eighteen and still had a lot of growing up to do. When I declined to return to school at the end of the year, my mother welcomed me home with open arms and gave me a place to live as long as I wanted. She helped me find a therapist that would work with me to improve my situation, and made sure I stayed on the medication meant to ease my anxiety.

The Windsor family did not do that. When they found out that Zach was doing drugs and breaking house rules, the mother threatened to kick Zach out of the house. When he broke curfew, she followed through on that threat.

This is child abuse. I won't mince words here, this is a *horrible* way to treat your child. Zach was clearly suffering greatly from issues that his parents refused to address, and he needed serious help. Personally, I would recommend sending him to a rehab clinic, which would help him detox and enforce rules on him that he would be unable to break. There are even specifically Christian clinics like this if they wanted to continue teaching him faith, especially since he only seemed to fall out of faith once he was on his own and, shocker, didn't have his parents forcing it on him.

But no. They kicked him out of the house, let him back on Christmas Eve, and when he missed curfew again, refused to let him back in on Christmas Day because he didn't want to obey house rules. Quoting from the book,

I said, "Zachariah, are you ready to obey the rules of this house?"
He said, "No, I just came to see what you got me for Christmas." And I said, "Nothing, God bless you." And I shut the door. That was the hardest thing I've ever experienced in my life.

I won't downplay the emotional rollercoaster that it must be for your child to go through a breakdown like this. It sucks. My mom had to go through it with me, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. However, the parents seem to have little to no empathy for what their child is going through.

Say you're Zach. You went to college for a few months and didn't know how to act outside of your very insulated little bubble. (This is somewhat common among religious groups -- the reason colleges are often considered liberal hotbeds is because they're the first place a lot of these kids will be exposed to new ideas, and big shock, sometimes they realise that what they were taught is actually pretty damaging!) You meet new people, and they give you drugs and alcohol. You just met these people and want to make friends, so you say yes. You drop out because you're doing awful and your parents refuse to let this go on your permanent record. They then kick you out of the house because leaving the campus didn't magically get rid of your addiction, let you back in a month later, then kick you out *again* because you, an *eighteen year old,* didn't want to obey house rules. The house rules, by the way, are never mentioned. We are not privy to how easy they might be to follow. Given this situation, it's reasonable to say Zach was probably in emotional turmoil. He had no idea what to do or where to go, so it's little surprise that he comes back after a week. After all, he was *homeless,* and the family went so far as to change the locks on their doors so he couldn't get into the house.

Once he returns, he works himself to exhaustion until his parents find the National Outdoor Leadership School, which purports itself to learn survival skills and offers college credit. Zach did not prepare for the trip, which was admittedly a mistake on his part, but it didn't seem like he wanted to go in the first place. He didn't prepare, and he didn't seem enthused. This culminated in an incident where he had a longboarding accident and called his father for assistance. His father, not taking it seriously, redirected him to talk to his mother, who came and apparently could see the bones in Zachariah's arms. The doctors absolutely did not recommend that Zach go on the trip, as it could exacerbate the wound, and an infection could lead to Zach losing his arm. His patents forced him to go anyway.

Let me be clear: this was incredibly dangerous. That Zach is still alive is almost a miracle, since he was unprepared in every way for this trip. Early on, the kids didn't know how to put up their tent in freezing rain, and the leader didn't help because it was apparently a 'teachable moment.' In the morning, Zach accidentally reopened his wound, and instead of trying to get help, the leader injecte incredibly hot water in every day and rebandged the wound. Zach could have lost his arm on this trip, and the book refers to it as 'tough love' instead of what it is: sanctioned abuse.

After this is a book about how to 'save' people older than you. It's not great. Dobson views not being Christian as a moral failing that must be 'fixed,' and he falls into the incredibly common trap of believing that only conversion, even on the deathbed, can save someone's soul. I must ask, if a soul lives a moral life and does good, why are they required to believe in the Christian God? Would any God do? What of the moral Jews, Muslims, Hindus, and atheists? What of the immoral Christians, the embezzlers and the murderers and the rapists? Dobson seems entirely unwilling to even entertain the idea that Christians can be immoral, seemingly falling victim to the No True Scotsman fallacy. It's not good look, and to be perfectly honest, the performative faith of many mainline Christians is one of the reasons I distance myself from the faith these days.

Chapter Ten starts...by advocating for censorship? Most of this chapter is relatively solid, since it essentially advocates for building a good relationship with your children and not yelling at them, but Dobson seems to believe that the culture is at war with.....something, and that teenagers can just get drugs if they ask for them nicely. Perhaps I was just a very isolated child, but I was never able to procure drugs from anyone other than my licensed physician, and even then I was only given very barebones anti-anxiety medication. I don't know where I would go if I wanted to do crack cocaine -- hell, weed is legal in my state and I don't even know where to get that! This chapter also casually includes a reference to spanking in a positive light, and spanking is, in fact, also child abuse. Children are too young to understand why you are hitting them, and even if they do understand, negative reinforcement does not work. Motivation by fear will seriously mess someone up. Also, a minor point, but they refer to Hillary Clinton at one point as the former First Lady, and not, as would be more accurate at the time this book was published, as Secretary of State. This is tied to a common thread in the book of devaluing women's accomplishments.

Literally the first page of the next chapter is another point in this favour. It's focused on a National Day of Prayer event in Washington, D.C., which Dobson is quick to inform us only men were present for. He speaks of two men and their speeches, and tells us the names of their wives -- Kathy and Hazel. Kathy is not afforded the dignity of her full name. Again, this is rather small, but it persists throughout the book. The rest of this chapter is mainly about the personal lives of two higher-profile men, but of course the second one is ever so casually homophobic. Craig Dance had a high-ranking position at a company that ran buses with ads on them, and they struck a deal with CBS for ad space. When CBS revealed their 2012 fall lineup of shows, Dance was scandalised to find out that there was a show -- Partners -- about two gay men in it.

Alright.

I'm queer. I wasn't going to bring it up in this review because there's no real reason for you all to know it, but if the book is going to bring up The Gays™, I need to make my credentials queer. I am nonbinary and have a complicated relationship with my sexuality, but this is not the reason I broke with the church. My religious grandmother is one of my greatest allies, and it's fully possible to have a queer relationship with God. There is no reason to oppose the airing of a show that seemed to have been mediocre at best -- Partners seems to have just been a boilerplate sitcom, for which the only thing going for it was the fact that it had queer characters in it. Queer folks are absolutely starved for representation, and the fact that Dance was scandalised about a show in which one of the two male leads was gay (because yeah, the leads weren't even dating! One of them was straight with a fiancée!) comes off as almost a parody of Christian homophobia to me.

It's also a frustrating truth that these kinds of people don't seem to believe that the USA is a secular nation, built from the ground of for freedom of religion. There is no state religion in the USA. Legal marriage should not be barred from queer people on the basis of religion. Dance wants to actively promote 'prayer for America,' and by the rest of my review, I shouldn't have to explain why I find that distasteful.

Chapter Twelve is all about indoctrination, and im not using that word lightly. Dobson liberally uses it in this chapter, and even speaks negatively about withholding indoctrination. Most of this chapter is just excerpts from a previous book of his. If he didn't quote his previous books this book would be at least twenty pages shorter.

I'm running out of steam to review this by now. Luckily, there are only twenty pages to go. Dobson seems to be against the idea of women inheriting money, since it will make their husbands depressed because their wives won't rely on them anymore. As someone who never intends to marry, I am somewhat appalled by this statement, essentially since it seems to be advocating for financial abuse. I would like to hope that most men are better than this, but hey, what do I know. I don't have wife that I 'enjoy the dependence of' what the hell does that mean. This chapter also claims that Scripture doesn't condemn those with significant wealth. I will admit that I am at a disadvantage, since I have yet to find a translation of the Bible that doesn't bore me almost as much as the Lattimore translation of the Iliad, but I seem to recall Jesus saying something long the lines of 'it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.' That sounds suspiciously like condemnation to me.

After this final chapter are the appendices. I am not going to subject myself to any more of this book than I have to. What I will do, however, is subject my mother to my now heavily-annotated copy of the book, which I got for three dollars at my place of work. I still think I was overcharged for it.

[Robert Sutherland · Rating 3 out of 5]

Dobson calls this book the capstone of his ministry. Whether it was in Bringing Up Boys (or Girls) or The Strong Willed Child, he has pointed to the salvation of your children as a parent's greatest responsibility.
With a quarter of the book devoted to his own amazing legacy, Dobson then briefly reviews several stages of parenting as well as dealing with one's own unbelieving parents. These chapters read like flyovers and don't get detailed... those are fleshed out in other of his books.
While the coverage is cursory, it does emphasize the importance and power of prayer in parenting. That's my biggest takeaway from the book.
The problem is that almost no one comes from a legacy like his... with four generations of god-following ancestors like Dobson. Many are the recipients of terrible legacies, perhaps multiple generations of alcoholism, physical or sexual abuse, broken marriages, or materialism.
If that is the case, it is up to you to be the first in the line to begin a godly legacy going forward.
The book was a good reminder of what is really important in life and beyond. It inspires us to intentionally cultivate an eternal perspective in our parenting.I

[Malin Friess · Rating 2 out of 5]

Dobson argues that "Your Legacy" is the most important book he has ever written, because there is nothing more meaningful than passing your faith on to your children.

Dobson touches on many different issues from reaching prodigal children (kick them out of the house if they are using drugs), reaching parents who are unbelievers, and stories of parents that got it right.

2 stars for this book. A disproportionate number of chapters were devoted to Dobson's own personal legacy. Futhermore, Dobson needs to be careful to differentiate between sharing your faith with your children and mandating your children to have faith (The latter can backfire). I did enjoy the stories of how parents firmly dealt with prodigal children. Dobson also encourages parents to pray with and read the Gospels with their children.

[Ray Branch · Rating 3 out of 5]

The premise of Dr. James Dobson's book, Your Legacy: The Greatest Gift, can be summed up in the Bible, “A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children”. Dr. Dobson speaks of the importance of leaving a legacy for our children and generations to come. The first five chapters review the family history of Dr. Dobson going back to 1862 when his great-grandfather, George Washington McCluskey was born. Dr. Dobson then speaks to how his own life has been affected by the previous generations and how it has helped him to determine to leave a lasting legacy as well. These chapters set the tone for the remainder of the book as Dr. Dobson explains the importance of leaving a godly legacy as well as the pitfalls to avoid in doing so. This is a great book and different from many of Dobson's other books. It is a book that will challenge you and is highly recommended.

[Kelly · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received an advance copy of this book from a Goodreads giveaway. I enjoyed the chapters giving Dobson's family history. They show what leaving a legacy looks like and what we should hope to do. The picture section was also an interesting look into the author's family and life. The rest of the book gave an overview of what leaving a legacy might entail and many good tips pointing to Dobson's other books for a more detailed look at specifics.

[Eric · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dr. Dobson is the foremost family expert of the past 50 years. This book is not so much a How To book but a collection of stories that should encourage and support committing a family to the Lord's care and how to have a purpose in parenting beyond the current moment. It's an easy read and not a doctrinal work. Should be used as a supplement to other faith based practices that should be in place in a Christian home.

[Meagan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed the book, and I appreciate that it caused me to think more about how to share my faith with my son in a more intentional way. I wish, though, that the book gave more practical ideas (such as those in the book's appendix) rather than focusing quite so much on Dobson's family.

[Michelle Welch · Rating 5 out of 5]

An outstanding reminder that we need to create lasting memories for those that come after us. What we do effects every generation that follows our lives. We need to start today living so that our grandchildren will benefit from what we leave behind.

[Lisa · Rating 2 out of 5]

I can imagine Dr. Dobson's publisher or literary agent saying to him, "You should write a book about legacy, that is a popular theme now. Tell stories and basically the same things you have written in all your other books."

I appreciated that he clarified that "Raise up a child in the way he should go and he will not depart from it" does not this is a promise and all children raised in a Christian home will choose to follow Christ.

He tells many stories about the rebellious child although "rebellion" only involves drugs, alcohol, running away from home etc. He does not talk about adult children who live morally and like they believe in the book of Proverbs but deny that Christ is the only way to God and have become atheist, agnostics, some militant, some tolerant.

[Allison Pickett · Rating 2 out of 5]

Dr. Dobson spends more time reminding us of the importance of leaving a strong spiritual legacy for our kids than he does offering tips and suggestions. Overall, I found two chapters to be helpful and the rest to be ok. I've read books on this subject that I prefer to this one but I'm always thankful for anything that reminds me that my kids watch my every move and to be praying non-stop for my family.

[Gerson Vázquez · Rating 5 out of 5]

Un gran recordatorio sobre el verdadero valor del legado que podemos dejar a nuestros hijos y generaciones futuras. Lo más importante no son los bienes materiales que podamos acumular sino la certeza que volveremos a estar reunidos como familia en la eternidad junto a nuestro Señor y Salvador Jesucristo.

[Sharon Maerten-Moore · Rating 3 out of 5]

James C. Dobson is much more conservative than me and I disagree with some of his fundamental beliefs. But I like to listen to and read things outside my norms. He did make some good points about raising children and there were some interesting family stories.

[James Wilson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Every Christian parent needs to read this book! This book shared the history of the Dobson family and laid out a plan for bringing up your children in the faith. This book stressed the importance of beginning early and shared tips on how to make it happen.

[Katie Godfrey · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was expecting more practical application, but still a good book

[Gary Cain · Rating 5 out of 5]

No matter where you are in life, your integrity determines your legacy.

A must read.

[Tony Harris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great advice from arguably the world's best on families.

[Cindy aka "The Book Fairy" · Rating 5 out of 5]

This one is so profound and stiring to realize how important it is to instill christian values and pray for our kids; eternity matters!!I wept many times during reading as I moved greatly++

[Dostalik]

Don’t you want to remembered? Dr Dobson is such an encourager. He shows us how in a grand way!

[Kevin Bozgoz · Rating 5 out of 5]

I will continue to come back to this book. Must read.

[Cesar · Rating 3 out of 5]

Books gives good examples of what leaving a legacy is all about. I didn’t learn anything new and at times writing when off topic. Overall, good book for a new believer.

[Renae Hall · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's a solid book for every parent wanting to share Jesus with their children.

[Bob Mendelsohn · Rating 3 out of 5]

Dobson's most recent book is a compilation of many of his other books. I'm not sure that anything is really new in this one, but I particularly liked the grace-filled chapter on adult children who don't believe like we do. It was almost generous and comforting. The constant reminder to parents that we have to lead our children and grandchildren to believe in Jesus as Saviour is a bit of a harangue at times.

I did enjoy the family memories he shared from across the generations and the chapters from his daughter and adopted son.

[Erin · Rating 2 out of 5]

Much more of an autobiography about his legacy than about building a legacy in your own family. The first section in the appendix fit the description of the book better.