This is one of those rare books I’ve read where I absolutely hated every bit of it. Found no redeeming qualities to speak of. I was hopeful about this book and giving this author a try, but by the end of this read I was damn near ready to pull my hair out.
So, here’s my warning. I am annoyed af and this is going to be a mean rant. I have NOTHING against the author, wish her all the best, but I have to get it off my chest because I have no one else to talk to it about and it’s eating at me. This is probably going to be obnoxiously long btw.
I don’t even know where to fucking start. Maybe with the fact that I don’t know which character I hated the most between Lola and Ben. Let’s start with a little list for each of them. Just a few basic things, as most of the problems I had with the book I’m going to get into separately.
Lola:
- She’d argue with a goddamn lamppost. Swear to god. 9.8/10 times that Ben said something to Lola, Lola had to argue her ass off. Just, stfu. PLEASE. I am TIRED of hearing you talk.
-
“I’m new Lola. I’m re-inventing myself.”
Into who? A woman, in this day and age, who doesn’t keep the fucking door locked literally ever-even though the fucking mob is after you for money-and kisses guys that were talking shit about you needing a man two seconds prior? Who has the survival skills of a fucking toothbrush? I’m making this into another paragraph later in the review just because this is one of the things that irritated me the most, but Lola was so stupid sometimes that I was screaming at my phone hoping she could hear me telling her what a dumbass she was. After just a short while, I couldn’t even feel bad about what she’d been through because she reminded me about everything she’d ever been through just about every chapter and it got old and her dumbassery really just took the front seat.
- Honestly, there’s not much else to her personality. The majority of the book was made up of her repetitive talk about re-inventing herself, while arguing and fighting back and forth with Ben.
Now on to Ben:
- I can not STAND a mmc or mfc who is an adult, who has the mindset of a child. Ben hated Lola simply because he thought she had everything handed to her due to her being the daughter of a mayor, and even though he was repeatedly told things about Lola that proved he didn’t know her story like he idiotically thought, he still judged her as being a girl with a silver-spoon in her mouth and someone who has never had to deal with real life struggles. So dumb. The only struggle he’s ever faced is building up his shop, but he had the support of his mom at least. AND he even had a family business going to be handed down to him. Sure, he would’ve had to struggle to bring it back to being profitable or whatever, but still.
- A quote directly from Ben:
“A pair of pretty eyes and a fat ass can get a woman anywhere with me.”
This is his thought after he breaks into-technecally, he just opens the back door to the bakery because it’s unlocked, but still-Lola’s new bakery that is next door to his tattoo shop/upstairs apartment and sees Lola for the first time. So, am I shocked that the rest of the book was full of him saying misogynistic shit? Not really. Still annoyed though.
-
“You’re mine.” “She’s mine.” “Mine.”
We get it. You said it two seconds ago, and you’ll probably say it in another two seconds, but I’m telling you - we heard you the first 17 times. Please, stop the caveman shit.
Them as a couple? Don’t understand it. I kid you not, the SAME arguments they were having at the beginning are the same stupid fucking arguments they were having with less than 10% of the book left.
It’s so repetitive. With the loud noise/music issues causing them to fight, him “breaking into” her place, her going to yell at him or him coming to fuss at her about her crappy music and unlocked doors - it was the same shit over and over the entire book just about.
Prime example of how idiotic Lola was: She gets cornered in her bakery and then threatened and sort of harmed by a guy from the mob that is hassling her for money that her dad owes, and Ben breaks it up, then he tells her she’s going to stay with him because of it. He’s pushy and annoying, but it was honestly the most sensible thing. Her staying by herself in a pretty unsecure apartment vs her staying with someone else? Pretty evident what she should do. But does she think about it logically? No. Like a child, she has to get mad at him and cause an argument. Oh, after telling Ben to kiss her and make her forget what just happened. Tf? Kissing him is the last thing you should be doing right now. How about you go buy a gun or something to protect yourself? Idiot. But yeah, they argue, and the argument is stupid, they both say dumb shit, but at the root of it is she doesn’t want to stay with him and would rather risk her life without staying with him or letting him stay with her. Like, I get it in a way, she shouldn’t have to depend on him to save her, but the girl isn’t doing anything to save herself. She’s basically got a death wish.
Then, after months of them messing around, and after Ben brought her to meet his family and everything, not to mention his non-stop “you’re mine. mine. mine. mine.” bullshit, she get’s almost kidnapped and ends up in the hospital, then after they leave the hospital she tries to go back upstairs to her apartment to stay by herself. Ben isn’t having it and she argues with him soooooo fucking long for no damn reasonnnnnn!! She causes about a 15 page argument where they just repeat themselves over and over. He’s trying to convince her he doesn’t hate her, saying he’s basically been obsessed with her since the beginning, blah blah, and all she can say is shit like,
“No. You hate me. You don’t even like me.”
This is at like 90%. 90! My god, the amount of times I cussed them both out while reading this repetitive and dumb as shit argument that spanned 15-ish pages was unreal. I was so over it. Scratch that, I was over it like 70% ago. I should've DNF'ed it and I have no clue why I didn't. I digress.
At this point my ranting is going to be random, and pretty much already was, because I’m just jotting down random things coming to mind in no particular order…
Hattie? Probably the only likable character.
Oh, the mob aspect. Wtf was that? That was so dumb. All of it. I don’t even want to get into it, other than asking why? Why does every book nowadays have to include a random mob/mafia tie into it? And it was done so poorly in this book. Laughable, really.
The dad? Wish he would’ve been offed. Annoying af. Hated him. And the fact that he spent the whole book being an absolute greedy, slimy motherfucker, using Lola’s mom’s death as a way to guilt Lola into paying his debts, and nothing happened to him? Like, the book ends shortly after Lola nearly got kidnapped/killed, and Ben yells at her dad some and then her dad leaves the hospital and the last that is mentioned about her father is during Lola’s inner monologue not long after all that where she says,
“I finally had my come to Jesus talk with dad and Lilah and how his shit will no longer be my responsibility, how it’s also not Lilah’s."
How is that the end of that? How does that wrap up 15+ years of all the guilt-tripping and treating Lola like trash, and the gambling? How is this time different? He’s not listened to her saying the exact same shit in the past, has repeatedly guilted her by using her mom’s death by saying,
“She would want you to help me.”
or whatever it was he said, but he just suddenly is cured of his assholeness and just, like, quits gambling? Nah. That makes no sense whatsoever. And how is he still the mayor? The fact that he was never outted for all the crooked shit he did/was doing and he just wasn’t mentioned again baffled me. I honestly thought he’d be killed or prisoned. Don’t get it.
I don’t understand how Lola survived 30 years against everything including the freaking mob, but the second she moves next to Ben she has to be saved 20 times. Major eye roll.
The daddy thing? Kinda odd. Not daddy kink in general, just the way it was gone about in the book. Didn’t seem right. Like, it was basically just Ben calling himself Daddy a bunch lol. Idk, it just didn’t seem to flow with the character dynamic so it just came across as try hard I guess. Just a personal take. I, for one, enjoy reading books with this kink, but something about the way it was portrayed with these characters made me wish it wasn’t a thing in this book. Maybe the author’s first time trying to incorporate it into her writing? Honestly unsure since this is the first book I’ve read by them I think. Who knows.
“Sweet girl,” or “My girl,”
was kinda cutesy the first time…maybe even the second. But the 47th time? Over it. Between Ben calling her that and
“Mine.”
every damn sentence, I was sooooo over it. Yet, somehow, Lola hears this a million times but she’ll just randomly get shocked he calls her these things as if she hasn’t heard it 15 hundred times already. At this point I’m wondering if the author has amnesia or Lola does, because there’s so much in this book that is repetitive and sometimes completely contradicting to something said just a few pages ago. For example, she texts her dad and doesn’t get a response, but then she says that he responded around midnight, then later she says she never heard back from him, so I was lost sometimes thinking I’m mixing shit up.
Anyways, back to Ben, he was way over the top with the
“I am man. I must protect my woman.”
thing. And the switch from him not being able to stand Lola to
“she’s mine and has been since the beginning”
was so out of the blue. The relationship building was absolute shit in this book. Made no sense, like most other things.
Something else I don’t understand? Ben’s constant breaking into Lola’s bakery/apartment isn’t seen by her as him being psycho? The only thing I could think of during these moments was about a DV situation, and how having a man break down my door when I didn't want them to come in would scare the absolute shit out of me. He literally breaks her door down at one point to get to her and she is cool with it in the end because he was just worried about her. I could understand if he wasn’t hearing from her and was geniniuely worried she was like laying in there dying, but she was talking to him through the door basically just being an annoying brat about not wanting to stay with him. Breaking the door down was a bit much.
And possibly the most laughable bit is at the end where Lola confronts Ben’s dad about their family business and how Ben’s dad should be supportive of Ben and shouldn’t give him a hard time about not wanting to go into the family business, and gives this long speech and at the end Ben’s dad is basically like,
“You know what? You’re right.”
Even though his wife has been telling him the same shit for years. Seriously? It just took a random girl you’ve met twice to convince you to not be an asshole? Riiiight. But, the same thing basically happened between Ben and Lola’s dad. Don’t understand. Logic on zero.
Okay, I think that’s enough. I’m tired of ranting now and ready to put this book behind me. Save yourself the time of reading this if you don't want to read 400 pages of the same arguments and the same things happening over and over until the end.