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Mom, I’m Gay - Loving Your LGBTQ Child Without Sacrificing Your Faith
“When our child told us they were attracted to the same sex, we were shocked. The usual questions flooded what would this mean for their life? Would they be safe? Would they ever have children? We truly had no idea what lay ahead. But here’s the realization that smacked we were now the ‘others.’ Over the three years following our child’s revelation, we met many Christian parents of gay kids, and realized we were not the only ones to see that the emperor had no clothes. I believe that God is shaking the church until what’s left is the God. There IS a way to love your LGBTQ child without sacrificing your faith. We can have more peace than we ever knew possible, and joy beyond our wildest dreams, as our children flourish in God’s inexhaustible love for them. I hope you will join me on this quest.” – Susan Cottrell
…
It’s finally here, the book so many of you have been asking for — with a special foreword by Justin Lee, author of Torn and Executive Director of The Gay Christian Network.
“Susan Cottrell offers us a book from a Christian parent’s perspective, in what will surely be an oasis in the desert for so many parents.” – Justin Lee, Author of Torn and Executive Director of The Gay Christian Network
“I often get asked by parents for resources that can address the struggles of raising LGBT sons and daughters without having to leave faith behind. Susan Cottrell’s book, Mom, I’m Gay, does just that. This is the kind of book that parents will love. No one should ever have to choose between who they are, whom they love and what they believe. Sadly, though, many parents feel caught between their faith and love for their LGBT child. Cottrell helps parents find a way to see their faith as a means of helping them to love better, including loving their children better, no matter their gender identity or sexual orientation. I am very grateful for this book.” – Sharon Groves, PhD, Director, Religion and Faith Program, The Human Rights Campaign
“Susan’s book captures the essence of what Christian parents struggle with when their child comes out. It challenges parents as they navigate the minefield of what they’ve heard in church and what think they understand from the Bible. What’s unique is this book doesn’t go the typical route of challenging verse-interpretation. The writing comes from Susan’s heart as a personal experience of her faith and love for God and her family. We will definitely be adding several copies to our PFLAG library and recommend it to Christian parents of LGBTQ children.” - Conal Charles, Co-President, PFLAG Atlanta
…
It’s finally here, the book so many of you have been asking for — with a special foreword by Justin Lee, author of Torn and Executive Director of The Gay Christian Network.
“Susan Cottrell offers us a book from a Christian parent’s perspective, in what will surely be an oasis in the desert for so many parents.” – Justin Lee, Author of Torn and Executive Director of The Gay Christian Network
“I often get asked by parents for resources that can address the struggles of raising LGBT sons and daughters without having to leave faith behind. Susan Cottrell’s book, Mom, I’m Gay, does just that. This is the kind of book that parents will love. No one should ever have to choose between who they are, whom they love and what they believe. Sadly, though, many parents feel caught between their faith and love for their LGBT child. Cottrell helps parents find a way to see their faith as a means of helping them to love better, including loving their children better, no matter their gender identity or sexual orientation. I am very grateful for this book.” – Sharon Groves, PhD, Director, Religion and Faith Program, The Human Rights Campaign
“Susan’s book captures the essence of what Christian parents struggle with when their child comes out. It challenges parents as they navigate the minefield of what they’ve heard in church and what think they understand from the Bible. What’s unique is this book doesn’t go the typical route of challenging verse-interpretation. The writing comes from Susan’s heart as a personal experience of her faith and love for God and her family. We will definitely be adding several copies to our PFLAG library and recommend it to Christian parents of LGBTQ children.” - Conal Charles, Co-President, PFLAG Atlanta
128 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 5, 2014
25 people are currently reading
175 people want to read
About the author
Susan Cottrell
13 books36 followersSUSAN COTTRELL is the prominent voice for faith parents of LGBTQI children through her nonprofit organization, FreedHearts.
Watch her TEDx talk here! https://youtu.be/rP01bH9Ljf4
Susan is an international speaker, writer, theologian, with a Master of Arts in Theological Studies. Human Rights Campaign (HRC) endorses FreedHearts as the premiere LGBTQ advocate for faith families.
Susan spent 20 years in the non-affirming Evangelical church, served as the Vice-President of PFLAG Austin, TX, and was featured on ABC's 20/20.
Her books “Mom, I’m Gay”—Loving Your LGBTQ Child and Strengthening Your Faith, True Colors—Celebrating the Truth and Beauty of the Real You, and Radically Included—49 Verses that Will Change Your Love and Change Your Life have been endorsed by HRC, PFLAG, Q Christian Network and many others.
She and her husband Rob have been married for 36 years, have five children, two of whom are in the LGBTQI community, and live near Seattle, Washington.
“Susan has this fierce, loving, don’t mess with me, Mom vibe.”—Rev Ashley Harness, Auburn Seminary
“What impresses me about Susan is that she’s not someone who argues and strongarms people into seeing things her way. She’s someone who listens and cares for others really well. Her presence challenges Christians who reject our friends in the LGBTQ community to understand the love of God.” - Michael Hidalgo, Lead Pastor, Denver Community Church
Watch her TEDx talk here! https://youtu.be/rP01bH9Ljf4
Susan is an international speaker, writer, theologian, with a Master of Arts in Theological Studies. Human Rights Campaign (HRC) endorses FreedHearts as the premiere LGBTQ advocate for faith families.
Susan spent 20 years in the non-affirming Evangelical church, served as the Vice-President of PFLAG Austin, TX, and was featured on ABC's 20/20.
Her books “Mom, I’m Gay”—Loving Your LGBTQ Child and Strengthening Your Faith, True Colors—Celebrating the Truth and Beauty of the Real You, and Radically Included—49 Verses that Will Change Your Love and Change Your Life have been endorsed by HRC, PFLAG, Q Christian Network and many others.
She and her husband Rob have been married for 36 years, have five children, two of whom are in the LGBTQI community, and live near Seattle, Washington.
“Susan has this fierce, loving, don’t mess with me, Mom vibe.”—Rev Ashley Harness, Auburn Seminary
“What impresses me about Susan is that she’s not someone who argues and strongarms people into seeing things her way. She’s someone who listens and cares for others really well. Her presence challenges Christians who reject our friends in the LGBTQ community to understand the love of God.” - Michael Hidalgo, Lead Pastor, Denver Community Church
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
December 6, 2016
It's been some time since my brother came out as a gay man. That decision some fifteen years in the past opened my eyes to realities I had previously ignored. What was once an academic discussion, became personal. As a family we embraced my brother. What I have learned over the years is that such revelations not only affect the person coming out, but the family as well. Not every family is equally equipped to deal with this reality. That's one reason why LGBT children often find it difficult to come out to family, especially parents. You don't want to risk being rejected by those closest to you.
As we moved toward Open and Affirming status at the congregation I serve as pastor, we invited David Gushee to come to the church and speak on the issue of reaching out and embracing LGBT persons. Among those who came to the sessions was a group of moms from a local megachurch. They found themselves in a difficult place. They were moms of gay and lesbian children, but their church was less than welcoming. This put them in a difficult position, for they loved their children and wanted their children to love Jesus as they knew Jesus loved them. Unfortunately the church seemed to be an impediment. On the Saturday of that two-day experience, I discerned a calling -- that was to create a ministry, a sort of Christian PFLAG that would allow for a conversation about faith and sexuality, a safe place for conversation and for support. David confirmed that wherever he spoke, he had conversations with moms and dads who felt alone and unsupported by their faith communities.
What I was looking for was a resource to help move forward. Ironically this resource sat on my stack of review books for several months. There have been a number of great books dealing with faith and sexual orientation that have emerged over the past several years. I've read many of them, including Justin Lee's Torn: Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays-vs.-Christians Debate and David Gushee's Changing Our Mind: A call from America's leading evangelical ethics scholar for full acceptance of LGBT Christians in the Church. So this one sat. When I finally picked up I realized that an answer to my fervent prayers had been with me for some time.
Susan Cottrell is the mother of two lesbian daughters. She is also the founder of FreedHearts, a ministry for LGBTQ individuals. She's active with PFLAG. She comes out of an evangelical background, having been actively involved in local church life. She understands the disconnect between the stances of her faith community and the reality of her family. As Justin Lee notes in his foreword to the book, this isn't a book about the politics of sexual orientation or debates about the Bible (there are two brief chapters covering the so-called clobber passages). Rather, as Justin notes, "this is a book about how you can respond as a parent or loved one-- knowing what you can change and what you can't and recognizing the ways your own response has the power to mend a damaged relationship or push your child away forever" (p. xii).
"Mom, I'm Gay" is written by a mom to other parents, offering them some words of support and guidance. She understands that the Christian community can be a stumbling block for parents and children. She writes this to strengthen family bonds and hopefully spiritual ones as well. The book emerges out of her own life and conversations with parents and children.
The book is comprised of thirty-six brief chapters, none more than four pages in length. The chapters are arranged into four sections. Part one focuses on "Coping with the Shock." The chapters in this section take note of the reality that for most parents, having an LGBTQ child wasn't what they expected. So, let's be honest with our feelings, but not stopping there. In Part two she deals with "Understanding Your Child's Experience." There are two helpful chapters in this section dealing with "what not to say." This is important because our words can destroy relationships, even if we don't mean to do so. Part Three invites us to "Respond in Love." Chapters here include "Embrace Your Child," "Don't Shame Your Child," and "Let Go of Your Plans." The theme of these chapters, and the others in the section is one of unconditional love. Such is the love we would expect of a parent, though we know such is not always the case. My brother was fortunate, as was Cheryl's cousin, my cousin whose family is Jehovah's Witness wasn't so fortunate. Jeff has been excluded from his family, but he and my brother have formed a strong family bond. Unfortunately, faith has been lost in the process.
In Part Four, Susan Cottrell deals with matters of faith. The section is titled "Working It Out With God." It is in this section that she deals with how we approach matters of faith. One chapter is titled: "You Don't Have to Protect God." She reminds us that God can handle things, so instead of trying to protect God from the challenge of the LGBTQ person, we can turn to God for comfort and strength. As she notes in another chapter, God can handle things.
Finally, in Part Five, she speaks of "Finding a Community of Support." In these chapters she speaks clearly of the importance of finding communities that will support and sustain. She's been part of the faith community long enough to know that the church is often not that safe place. You may have to find a new faith community. You may also have to turn to organization like PFLAG, which is secular in nature, but can be very helpful in sustaining one's relationships with one's children and family members. Fortunately, there are growing numbers of Open and Affirming Congregations. Unfortunately, these often go undiscovered because LGBTQ persons and their families have been so hurt by their faith communities that they are unable to seek out such communities.
My hope and prayer is that this book, which is in a second edition, can serve as a catalyst for families and for churches. The book is set up in such a way that it can be used by a support group to wrestle with questions and concerns. What is valuable here is that the process needn't be undertaken in anger. I especially think that this book and perhaps ministries that will grow from it (and I'm just now discovering how the FreedHearts organization could be of help to fulfillment of the vision laid on my heart for ministry to families of LGBTQ persons.
Whether or not you are a parent of an LGBTQ child, I believe this book will be enlightening, and faith affirming. May the healing begin.
As we moved toward Open and Affirming status at the congregation I serve as pastor, we invited David Gushee to come to the church and speak on the issue of reaching out and embracing LGBT persons. Among those who came to the sessions was a group of moms from a local megachurch. They found themselves in a difficult place. They were moms of gay and lesbian children, but their church was less than welcoming. This put them in a difficult position, for they loved their children and wanted their children to love Jesus as they knew Jesus loved them. Unfortunately the church seemed to be an impediment. On the Saturday of that two-day experience, I discerned a calling -- that was to create a ministry, a sort of Christian PFLAG that would allow for a conversation about faith and sexuality, a safe place for conversation and for support. David confirmed that wherever he spoke, he had conversations with moms and dads who felt alone and unsupported by their faith communities.
What I was looking for was a resource to help move forward. Ironically this resource sat on my stack of review books for several months. There have been a number of great books dealing with faith and sexual orientation that have emerged over the past several years. I've read many of them, including Justin Lee's Torn: Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays-vs.-Christians Debate and David Gushee's Changing Our Mind: A call from America's leading evangelical ethics scholar for full acceptance of LGBT Christians in the Church. So this one sat. When I finally picked up I realized that an answer to my fervent prayers had been with me for some time.
Susan Cottrell is the mother of two lesbian daughters. She is also the founder of FreedHearts, a ministry for LGBTQ individuals. She's active with PFLAG. She comes out of an evangelical background, having been actively involved in local church life. She understands the disconnect between the stances of her faith community and the reality of her family. As Justin Lee notes in his foreword to the book, this isn't a book about the politics of sexual orientation or debates about the Bible (there are two brief chapters covering the so-called clobber passages). Rather, as Justin notes, "this is a book about how you can respond as a parent or loved one-- knowing what you can change and what you can't and recognizing the ways your own response has the power to mend a damaged relationship or push your child away forever" (p. xii).
"Mom, I'm Gay" is written by a mom to other parents, offering them some words of support and guidance. She understands that the Christian community can be a stumbling block for parents and children. She writes this to strengthen family bonds and hopefully spiritual ones as well. The book emerges out of her own life and conversations with parents and children.
The book is comprised of thirty-six brief chapters, none more than four pages in length. The chapters are arranged into four sections. Part one focuses on "Coping with the Shock." The chapters in this section take note of the reality that for most parents, having an LGBTQ child wasn't what they expected. So, let's be honest with our feelings, but not stopping there. In Part two she deals with "Understanding Your Child's Experience." There are two helpful chapters in this section dealing with "what not to say." This is important because our words can destroy relationships, even if we don't mean to do so. Part Three invites us to "Respond in Love." Chapters here include "Embrace Your Child," "Don't Shame Your Child," and "Let Go of Your Plans." The theme of these chapters, and the others in the section is one of unconditional love. Such is the love we would expect of a parent, though we know such is not always the case. My brother was fortunate, as was Cheryl's cousin, my cousin whose family is Jehovah's Witness wasn't so fortunate. Jeff has been excluded from his family, but he and my brother have formed a strong family bond. Unfortunately, faith has been lost in the process.
In Part Four, Susan Cottrell deals with matters of faith. The section is titled "Working It Out With God." It is in this section that she deals with how we approach matters of faith. One chapter is titled: "You Don't Have to Protect God." She reminds us that God can handle things, so instead of trying to protect God from the challenge of the LGBTQ person, we can turn to God for comfort and strength. As she notes in another chapter, God can handle things.
Finally, in Part Five, she speaks of "Finding a Community of Support." In these chapters she speaks clearly of the importance of finding communities that will support and sustain. She's been part of the faith community long enough to know that the church is often not that safe place. You may have to find a new faith community. You may also have to turn to organization like PFLAG, which is secular in nature, but can be very helpful in sustaining one's relationships with one's children and family members. Fortunately, there are growing numbers of Open and Affirming Congregations. Unfortunately, these often go undiscovered because LGBTQ persons and their families have been so hurt by their faith communities that they are unable to seek out such communities.
My hope and prayer is that this book, which is in a second edition, can serve as a catalyst for families and for churches. The book is set up in such a way that it can be used by a support group to wrestle with questions and concerns. What is valuable here is that the process needn't be undertaken in anger. I especially think that this book and perhaps ministries that will grow from it (and I'm just now discovering how the FreedHearts organization could be of help to fulfillment of the vision laid on my heart for ministry to families of LGBTQ persons.
Whether or not you are a parent of an LGBTQ child, I believe this book will be enlightening, and faith affirming. May the healing begin.
March 13, 2017
I got a free ecopy of this book from Net Galley in exchange for an honest review of the book.
I ask to review this book not because I have a child who is gay, but I have children who have gay friends. In fact last Thanksgiving she my daughter brought home a young man from hr college who says he is trans-gendered. He was welcome into our home with no problem whatsoever. A far cry from the father who told him not to come home for Thanksgiving.
I was hoping that I could understand the right and wrong things to say. The author does address that, but the politics in it is fairly overwhelming. For about the first quarter of the book she spouts the belief that God made your child that way. If you do not think that God did this then you are basically told how unloving you are. While she does not use the words, she basically is talking about the gay gene theory. It has not been proven either way, but she speaks as if it is the only truth. For a person who preaches that we should not judge, she judges you flat out if you disagree with her.
As a Christian, I also do not care for her bashing the church as a whole. She basically says that there is no church that will affirm your gay child. She late in the book talks about a select few that would be accepting and recommends a web site that you should go to. One of her problems here is she talks about people who have religion and not relationship. The church I go to (one of the megachurches she puts down with not names mentioned) when I told the pastor of the church that my daughter would be bringing a trans-gendered person to church said, great, we will love them like we love everyone else. You see, we preach a love for all in our church. A sin is a sin, and there sin is no worse than mine or yours. What matters is your relationship with God.
I can not recommend this book at all as long as the political baggage is attached to it. If she could have stuck to the ins and outs of loving a child who was gay I would have given it 5 stars. Since she got political about things I could only give it three. I also recommend that the author not judge others, just like she talks about in the book.
I ask to review this book not because I have a child who is gay, but I have children who have gay friends. In fact last Thanksgiving she my daughter brought home a young man from hr college who says he is trans-gendered. He was welcome into our home with no problem whatsoever. A far cry from the father who told him not to come home for Thanksgiving.
I was hoping that I could understand the right and wrong things to say. The author does address that, but the politics in it is fairly overwhelming. For about the first quarter of the book she spouts the belief that God made your child that way. If you do not think that God did this then you are basically told how unloving you are. While she does not use the words, she basically is talking about the gay gene theory. It has not been proven either way, but she speaks as if it is the only truth. For a person who preaches that we should not judge, she judges you flat out if you disagree with her.
As a Christian, I also do not care for her bashing the church as a whole. She basically says that there is no church that will affirm your gay child. She late in the book talks about a select few that would be accepting and recommends a web site that you should go to. One of her problems here is she talks about people who have religion and not relationship. The church I go to (one of the megachurches she puts down with not names mentioned) when I told the pastor of the church that my daughter would be bringing a trans-gendered person to church said, great, we will love them like we love everyone else. You see, we preach a love for all in our church. A sin is a sin, and there sin is no worse than mine or yours. What matters is your relationship with God.
I can not recommend this book at all as long as the political baggage is attached to it. If she could have stuck to the ins and outs of loving a child who was gay I would have given it 5 stars. Since she got political about things I could only give it three. I also recommend that the author not judge others, just like she talks about in the book.
September 26, 2021
What I liked about this book the most is that it wasn't based on the bible. Christians being asked to look at an alternative view.
I by no means suggest that this book answers everything and by reading it you're doubts will disappear.
The main issue I see regarding this book is that the people who need to read it won't. That there is the issue I have.
Being gay doesn't give you two heads nor is it catching.
It was well written but I doubt the target group will read it more likely to ignore it.
I by no means suggest that this book answers everything and by reading it you're doubts will disappear.
The main issue I see regarding this book is that the people who need to read it won't. That there is the issue I have.
Being gay doesn't give you two heads nor is it catching.
It was well written but I doubt the target group will read it more likely to ignore it.
August 3, 2016
I believe every Christian should read this book, especially if they do not have a LGBTQ person I their family or circle of friends.
The book reads more like a devotional, I just really love this book, it really brought me closer to God!!
Just read it!!!
The book reads more like a devotional, I just really love this book, it really brought me closer to God!!
Just read it!!!
August 18, 2016
One of the only books in a long time that I sat down and read at a single sitting. The author beautifully expresses the practical application of Christian love. While this book is largely aimed at families coming to terms with a member of the family "coming out," the principles could apply to many other situations. The chapters are short and easily digested and could easily be used as a devotional book for a month (there are 36 chapters), but it will be hard to read only one chapter a day. The prose is light and without jargon, so it can be handed to a parishioner with confidence. This will be a "go-to" book for future pastoral care.
October 8, 2024
Giving it five stars because this book definitely isn't relevant to a good chunk of people, but if this book IS relevant to you for whatever reason, then yeah, this is a good book for you.
Cried every few pages, TBH. Also as much as I hate to recall my own evangelical PK backstory, I must admit that yeah, this is definitely the kind of on-point theology that would piss off Christians that don't actually like reading the Bible. 🤪 Reminds me of things I used to point out as a kid in sunday school that would get me shushed or make the adults uncomfortable lmao. There were a couple points in there about baseline theology that had even little old me raising my eyebrows, but you know what--go off, queen. You suffered through seminary, you do with that training what you will.
All the references to Christians and their homophobic beliefs and related bullshit made me sick to my stomach per usual, and for that I am extremely grateful the book is over, but--yeah, anyways. This is definitely a book worth giving to the very hateful Christian homophobe in your life. If they're worth their salt and actually committed to the faith they claim to be, no doubt they'll be pissed off because this book is designed to make them think about their own belief systems and behavior .... but again, if they're worth anything they will make use of this book anyhow. Those who toss this book aside are definitely of the kind that are not worth your time or energy. (At baseline this book just points out the sacrilege of trying to play G-d and decide what the rules for everything are AND then be a horrible jackass about your own opinions--the bar we're trying to cross here as far as decent humane behavior and morals goes is SUPER duper low.)
Cried every few pages, TBH. Also as much as I hate to recall my own evangelical PK backstory, I must admit that yeah, this is definitely the kind of on-point theology that would piss off Christians that don't actually like reading the Bible. 🤪 Reminds me of things I used to point out as a kid in sunday school that would get me shushed or make the adults uncomfortable lmao. There were a couple points in there about baseline theology that had even little old me raising my eyebrows, but you know what--go off, queen. You suffered through seminary, you do with that training what you will.
All the references to Christians and their homophobic beliefs and related bullshit made me sick to my stomach per usual, and for that I am extremely grateful the book is over, but--yeah, anyways. This is definitely a book worth giving to the very hateful Christian homophobe in your life. If they're worth their salt and actually committed to the faith they claim to be, no doubt they'll be pissed off because this book is designed to make them think about their own belief systems and behavior .... but again, if they're worth anything they will make use of this book anyhow. Those who toss this book aside are definitely of the kind that are not worth your time or energy. (At baseline this book just points out the sacrilege of trying to play G-d and decide what the rules for everything are AND then be a horrible jackass about your own opinions--the bar we're trying to cross here as far as decent humane behavior and morals goes is SUPER duper low.)
August 27, 2017
Susan Cottrell visited our church and gave an encouraging talk to our welcoming and affirming congregation. Reading her book was interesting -- especially the foreword written by someone else. It struck me how something I take so for granted - welcoming our gay brothers and sisters with open arms -- remains controversial for so many church-going folks. In the spirit of the book, I'm going to be thankful for my church, my community and pray that others will get with the program sooner rather than later.
January 15, 2024
I would have loved for my parents to respond with half the love this book encourages people to. If you’re a parent struggling with accepting a queer child, this is a good place to start.
I wish it broke down the verses more. I spent years untangling the “sin” out of my same sex attraction. To summarize the biggest tools used against homosexuality in a single chapter is a little disheartening.
Overall, I’d still recommend, but you might have to do more digging when it comes to dismantling such deep rooted beliefs.
June 5, 2021
This was really good and I appreciated a lot of the takes it brought to the conversation. It’s certainly much better than some of the other Christian books that focus on how to adjust to having a gay child. Nothing about praying the gay away in this book.
I proofread this for my mom and I will buy her her own copy. She doesn’t know I’m buying it for her so we’ll see how it goes 😬
I proofread this for my mom and I will buy her her own copy. She doesn’t know I’m buying it for her so we’ll see how it goes 😬
July 4, 2019
A very good introduction to how to handle things when your child first come out. Short, practical chapter encouraging parents to give unconditional love first and always. She deals with scriptural issues for evangelical parents later in the book. The focus is unconditional love. I highly recommend.
October 23, 2020
I was looking for a book for students in my school’s Gay Straight Alliance to recommend to their parents, and this was a good start. It is straightforward and presents a clear case for love and acceptance, regardless of Biblical interpretation.
August 16, 2020
Felt like she was attacking and had baseless claims
March 14, 2022
opened my eyes
I was amazed at how blind I was in my previous views. I took on the views of the church…and it’s been a weight lifted off to realize the church may be wrong. God is love and love always comes first!
I was amazed at how blind I was in my previous views. I took on the views of the church…and it’s been a weight lifted off to realize the church may be wrong. God is love and love always comes first!
August 5, 2016
This was a nice book, t was written with a great intention. The message itself is really good but, sadly, the people who could be more benefit from it, the ones that are harming their beloved ones, are the ones who won’t give it a chance. For the ones who are willing to try to see things from a different point of view, this book can be great tool in this journey.
The book is divided in five sections that help the reader to how to cope with the shock, understanding your child’s experience, how to respond, how to work things out with God and finding support.
It help the parents to see how things said or think by them or by members of the community might be hurtful. I think one of the strongest parts of the book is the one that try to put the reader into the child’s experience. It’s very helpful to try to think how the other person might feel and the book makes a nice try on it.
It also take some of the most common arguments that some people from the church have against LGBTQ persons, and gives it a different meaning. It doesn’t try to dismiss people’s faith, but to help to see how some belief are against of the truthful meaning of a loving God.
The book tries to help to understand, to remain close to your love ones and to put prejudice and what others might think aside. I think it is a great book, but the results from it is in the hands of the reader and how much effort is willing to make.
I’m ending this review with a nice quote from the book that I think it’s the essence of it “Ïf you’re worried about what God will think of you, just cling mightily to the first and foremost command to love, love with all your heart, and let God reveal and heal the rest”
*Book provided by NetGalley.
The book is divided in five sections that help the reader to how to cope with the shock, understanding your child’s experience, how to respond, how to work things out with God and finding support.
It help the parents to see how things said or think by them or by members of the community might be hurtful. I think one of the strongest parts of the book is the one that try to put the reader into the child’s experience. It’s very helpful to try to think how the other person might feel and the book makes a nice try on it.
It also take some of the most common arguments that some people from the church have against LGBTQ persons, and gives it a different meaning. It doesn’t try to dismiss people’s faith, but to help to see how some belief are against of the truthful meaning of a loving God.
The book tries to help to understand, to remain close to your love ones and to put prejudice and what others might think aside. I think it is a great book, but the results from it is in the hands of the reader and how much effort is willing to make.
I’m ending this review with a nice quote from the book that I think it’s the essence of it “Ïf you’re worried about what God will think of you, just cling mightily to the first and foremost command to love, love with all your heart, and let God reveal and heal the rest”
*Book provided by NetGalley.
August 19, 2016
This book does a wonderful job of addressing the fears and concerns of a parent, especially a Christian parent, when learning their child identifies as LGBTQ and gives advice on how to be the loving, affirming, supportive parent that God wants us to be. The author discusses the traditional Christian viewpoint towards LGBTQ individuals and the verses used to condemn LGBTQ individuals and how these attitudes are not Christlike and the verses misunderstood. At the end of each chapter, the author includes questions for the reader to think about regarding the chapter topic. Each chapter starts with comments from someone who has faced the challenge of learning a child is LGBTQ or has been that child revealing his or her authentic self. There is also an appendix with letters and personal stories. However, I would have liked more personal stories, especially about the difficulties of having to reconsider one's beliefs and find acceptance. This book is a good resource for those wanting to know how to better show love and acceptance for their child and for children trying to help their parents be more accepting and understanding of the child's authentic self.
I received a copy of the ebook via NetGalley in exchange for a review.
I received a copy of the ebook via NetGalley in exchange for a review.
September 8, 2016
I received this book from Goodreads First Reads in exchange for an honest review....
This is a book that the world needs!! When the acceptance for homosexuality is at it's peak, it often leads Christian families wondering around in doubt and despair when their child steps forward with this bombshell. What do you do? This book answers that questions and helps parents learn that they don't have to give their faith and child an ultimatum. Well written and well put together, this author gives what every struggling Christian family might need.
This is a book that the world needs!! When the acceptance for homosexuality is at it's peak, it often leads Christian families wondering around in doubt and despair when their child steps forward with this bombshell. What do you do? This book answers that questions and helps parents learn that they don't have to give their faith and child an ultimatum. Well written and well put together, this author gives what every struggling Christian family might need.
July 12, 2014
This book offers insight into what to say/do (and what NOT to say/do) when a loved one's "coming out" intersects with your beliefs.
If you're looking for Biblical discussion, it's not here.
People first.
If you're looking for Biblical discussion, it's not here.
People first.
April 10, 2017
This book...this writer...this person...this Mom...I can not recommend this book more, for those with gay kids in the Christian community. Whether you are not accepting of your child (I fervently pray this changes for you) or are fully embracing this gift of a gay (LGBTQ+) kiddo -- this book will help you. It will help you navigate this sometimes cruel world, which sadly includes the church (way to often), the "clobber verses" some are want to employ in their argument (condemnation) against those in the LGBTQ+ community and what unconditional (Jesus!) love really means. And Susan made this an easy read -- just a few hours to learn a lifetime of love. Thank you Susan!
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