Some are born great, some attain greatness, some have it thrust upon them—and a rare few choose to achieve it by lugging a cello around on planes and trains, stoically suffering the taunts and insults of tone-deaf officialdom. Julian Lloyd Webber's musical odyssey is one of hilarious, nail-biting honesty for the layman and music buff alike, revealing several odd obsessions and hundreds of trade secrets that will leave you with the profound impression that in order to be a successful international cellist one must be able to combine a high degree of musical sensitivity with, as the author puts it, 'the hide of a fairly stocky rhinoceros'.