Why Are You So Sad?: A Child's Book About Parental Depression

by Beth Andrews, Nicole Wong (Illustrator)

Parents don't feel bad on purpose. They don't want to feel bad, just like you don't want to feel bad when you are sick with a cold or the flu and have to stay in bed when you would rather be outside playing. It just happens sometimes.

When a parent has depression, children often feel sad and confused themselves. This interactive book can help Why Are You So Sad? contains a comprehensive and authoritative note to parents by therapists from the disciplines of clinical social work and clinical psychology.

Genres: Childrens, Mental Health, Picture Books

32 pages, Hardcover

First published July 1, 2002

About the author

Librarian note:
There is more than one author with this name

Reviews

[Michelle Nigro · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is best classified as a therapy and understanding book. I chose it because it was addressed to children who have a parent dealing with depression. The mother is battling a case of severe depression and the son is encouraged to understand it's not his fault. This book is best read as a one-on-one opportunity. There are many pages which ask children to draw certain things (pictures of their own feelings or things they have tried to do). There is also a page where the reader is asked to write a list of questions they have about depression. This book deals openly and honestly with many of the effects of depression, whether it be not eating or wanting to remain in bed and isolated, or needing to be hospitalized for the depression. The book creates and encourages empathy for the both the parent with the depression as well as the child searching for answers and understanding.
Many of the pictures are presented in a vignette fashion. The illustrations do not cover the entire page and the text is prominently featured on each page with a traditional font. This seemed a bit of a clinical presentation to me. While the illustrations are effective and child-centered, they felt a bit simplistic and archaic. Even the choice of wallpaper in the family's home seemed a bit contrived and old-fashioned for my personal taste.
At first, it bothered me that the MOTHER was the one with the depression. However, upon further research I found women are more likely to deal with depression than man. Many factors contribute to this, most prominently the female hormones and the onset of post-partum depression for many women. It is more likely in a child's home that it would be the mom with depression. I would have liked it if the story could have shown both sides so that the child who has a father with clinical depression would not feel "left out," by the book's choice of representation.
Additionally, I do think this book gives a good picture of depression so that the child who does not have this reality can gain better social awareness and empathy for the child who lives this story in his or her own life.

[Paige · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very kid appropriate explanation & useful tool for parents to understand how to navigate the conversation.

[Randie D. Camp, M.S. · Rating 3 out of 5]

An informative book to help children understand their own feelings about having a parent with depression. Andrews provides a definition of depression and offers suggestions for coping. The book places emphasizes that children are not at fault for the depression, that they can't fix it, and their depressed parent still loves them even if they feel sad, yell, or don't have energy to play.

The book contains pages for the child draw pictures about their thoughts and feelings. Their is also a note to parents in the back that offers more insight and discussion for sharing the book with your child. Overall, I think the book is a great way to talk to children about depression but parents should read the book first and decide what pages they feel comfortable discussing.

[Arin Brutlag · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book directly addresses the reader and explains the symptoms of depression, as well as the occurrences that surround it, using simplistic terminology. There are several places throughout the book that allow the reader to draw pictures about different aspects of their parent’s depression and their own feelings and actions. The book reassures children that they are not at fault and informs them that there is help to be found and that their parent can get better, even when it seems hopeless. 32 pages.

Resources: The book is organized as a workbook of sorts, but also includes a note to parents and caregivers with sections on how the book can help, how to help children cope with parental depression, and understanding risk for depression in children.