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Bedded Bliss: A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After
Bedded A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After takes a peek behind the closed doors of married and committed couples to find out what makes long-term lust last. Award-winning author and editor Kristina Wright curates a collection of sexy and powerful erotic fiction and memoir from some of the top authors in the genre, all of whom are in committed relationships ranging from five to over thirty years. Wright contributes her own thoughtful insights and advice gleaned from her twenty-two year marriage and successful career tapping into the erotic fantasies of readers. Bedded Bliss entertains, educates and encourages couples to remember the reasons they fell in love and lust--and reminds them of all the reasons to stay there, lustfully ever after!
256 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2013
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275 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
December 30, 2015
I wasn't sure what to make of this book the first time I saw it, but what the hell... I’ll read pretty much anything. I have to admit though, I’m very picky when it comes to erotica. There needs to be a strong story, some amazing character development, or a good reason for all the sex- I’m not one to just read scene after scene of sex acts just because. Well in Bedded Bliss, there’s a great reason for all the steam, and I am proud to say that I loved this book!
Bedded Bliss: A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After is part self-help and part erotica. It offers tips, techniques, and a collection of short stories written by seasoned authors of erotica, purposely combined as a reminder that it is possible to have a satisfying sex life at every stage of one’s marriage by integrating imagination, determination, and a good sense of humor. Desiring one another after most couples have started rolling their eyes at the prospect is not luck, it’s work, and this book tastefully and encouragingly incorporates some helpful suggestions.
In the “self-help” aspect of this book, the author/editor Kristina Wright offers her personal experiences as well as her own imagination to provide readers with ideas on how to maintain quantity, quality, and spice in a couple’s sexual relationship. And the “erotica” element in this book is well done by empathizing with a variety of common struggles, whether it’s the stress of being laid off from a job, the hesitation that comes along with poor body image, or the anxiety that might come before verbalizing fantasies to one’s partner for the first time. Throughout all the erotic fiction, the characters and scenarios remain realistic and reinforce a relationship's foundation through intimacy. The stories may be explicit, but the emotional piece is not missed.
I’m glad I read this book and would recommend it to others who want the most out of their sexual relationships, whether they feel they need the help or not. A change in perspective can make all the difference and the opportunity to learn from others always holds value. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got an idea or two to try...
My favorite quote:
“The only two people you have to please are your partner and yourself. So forget everyone else. Forget what your best friend told you. Forget about the studies and whether they appeared in Cosmopolitan or the New York Times or some archaic journal with a longer subtitle than the Cosmo article, and focus on sharing yourself. All of yourself with your partner.”
Bedded Bliss: A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After is part self-help and part erotica. It offers tips, techniques, and a collection of short stories written by seasoned authors of erotica, purposely combined as a reminder that it is possible to have a satisfying sex life at every stage of one’s marriage by integrating imagination, determination, and a good sense of humor. Desiring one another after most couples have started rolling their eyes at the prospect is not luck, it’s work, and this book tastefully and encouragingly incorporates some helpful suggestions.
In the “self-help” aspect of this book, the author/editor Kristina Wright offers her personal experiences as well as her own imagination to provide readers with ideas on how to maintain quantity, quality, and spice in a couple’s sexual relationship. And the “erotica” element in this book is well done by empathizing with a variety of common struggles, whether it’s the stress of being laid off from a job, the hesitation that comes along with poor body image, or the anxiety that might come before verbalizing fantasies to one’s partner for the first time. Throughout all the erotic fiction, the characters and scenarios remain realistic and reinforce a relationship's foundation through intimacy. The stories may be explicit, but the emotional piece is not missed.
I’m glad I read this book and would recommend it to others who want the most out of their sexual relationships, whether they feel they need the help or not. A change in perspective can make all the difference and the opportunity to learn from others always holds value. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got an idea or two to try...
My favorite quote:
“The only two people you have to please are your partner and yourself. So forget everyone else. Forget what your best friend told you. Forget about the studies and whether they appeared in Cosmopolitan or the New York Times or some archaic journal with a longer subtitle than the Cosmo article, and focus on sharing yourself. All of yourself with your partner.”
Read
January 8, 2014Bedded Bliss: A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After is a very ambitious book. Editor Kristina Wright combines memoir (stories of her own long-term marriage), erotic fiction written by herself and others, and self help, and does so over a very broad range of situations. The book is addressed to married couples, and Wright includes chapters aimed at people who are struggling with young children, people dealing with the way sex changes with age, people interested in trying out kink or polyamory, people facing financial stress, and much more.
The ground Bedded Bliss covers makes for an interesting read—and attests to the ground that a married couple can cover over the course of a long sex life. Wright pulls off a difficult balancing act: she brings up many, many possible directions for married couples to go while at the same time affirming the value of too-often-maligned vanilla sex. The book is gentle but exciting, far-reaching and open-minded without making the reader feel as if spicing up the sex life requires a fat bank account and the flexibility of a member of Cirque du Soleil.
It's a very intimate book, and this is the thing I liked best about it. Wright and her contributors all open up about their own sex lives, and that makes the erotic fiction she includes feel all the more intimate in turn. Many contributors have more than one story in the collection, and I liked the effect—it made me feel as if I knew them better to see them presenting couples from several angles. In many cases, the stories seem more autobiographical than fictional. The writers often use first-person POV, along with the names of their actual spouses. In other cases, they use consistent characters over several stories, such as Jeremy Edwards' Mel and Lawrence or Heidi Champa's Duncan and Lena.
I also appreciated the inclusion of male writers in this book—they didn't make up fifty percent, but there were a higher proportion of them than in many collections of erotica that I've read. Considering the goals and subject matter of this book, I think it's important to have that perspective.
Some of the strengths of Bedded Bliss, however, can also become liabilities. Its wide subject matter can seem like a lack of focus at times. The material was all hot and interesting, but I couldn't always keep track of the through line. The book's chapters generally follow a format: a short essay from Wright, some exercises a couple could try, and erotic fiction related to the essay. As I read, however, the chapters ran together, and I wasn't always sure what was being demonstrated. In some cases I couldn't clearly see the distinction between one chapter and another. The last chapter in particular threw me. It contained many more erotic stories than the others and came off as a catch-all, a place to put the miscellany that hadn't fit well elsewhere.
This phenomenon was made more problematic because I read the Kindle edition of this book. The navigation and table of contents in the electronic version left much to be desired, and I often wished for the physical book instead. It would have helped me to be able to flip back and forth easily. This is the sort of book that made me want to make connections—to read stories in a different order than the one they're presented in, to skip around, to scan and explore. It particularly annoyed me that the Kindle Edition's table of contents did not list the erotic fiction titles and authors.
I have mixed feelings about how Bedded Bliss handled the reality of non-heterosexual married couples. There was one story by Evan Mora, a woman in a long-term lesbian relationship. I was glad to see it, but it was included in that random chapter at the end, so I'm not sure most non-heterosexual readers would get far enough to know it's there. The book could be read by a non-heterosexual couple, I suppose, but until I reached Mora's story, it had screamed heterosexual to me. Considering the inclusion of Mora's story, I wished there had been a paragraph or two in the introduction that made a point of welcoming LGBTQ readers to the table, and (in for a penny, in for a pound) a greater commitment to telling the stories of married couples outside the heteronormative spectrum. As it was, Mora's story struck me as too little, too late.
Another interesting but mixed feature of Bedded Bliss is that it's pretty clear it's aimed at couples who are currently happy or at least have a very strong foundation. For a reader who feels generally positive toward his or her spouse, the language of the book will likely feel affirming and encouraging. For a reader who's having deeper problems, this same language may be incredibly off-putting.
For example, Wright says, "If the idea of sharing your deepest, darkest sexual fantasies with your spouse sends you running into the closet, consider this: you got married because, in addition to being the love of your life and sexy as hell, this is the person you trust most in the world. Right?"
I've been married twice, so I read that passage with two sets of eyes. The current me can answer yes to that question (I am happily married this time, so far). In my previous marriage, however, that question would have filled me with helpless frustration.
I think it's good for a book like this to exist, one that tries to help marriages long before they're broken, or to help people build on something that's already good. Bedded Bliss does acknowledge in places, however, that there are limits to this approach and some relationships may not work out.
In the end, I think Bedded Bliss may not have matched the heights of its ambition, but the result is still a book that will be very sexy and valuable to many people. This book fills an important niche that's rarely served (the only similar book I can think of is Alison Tyler's Never Have the Same Sex Twice). Wright and her contributors are wise about marriage, encouraging and realistic, rich with experience to share. They offer some necessary pushback against media-driven images of who gets to have good sex and what good sex is. They demonstrate how each couple must define for themselves what it means to have a sexually satisfying relationship. That's important, and I'm glad to have read this book.
Disclosures: This post is part of the official blog tour for Bedded Bliss. I write for Cleis Press, and have been edited by Kristina Wright. However, I purchased my own copy of Bedded Bliss, and the opinions I've expressed are my own.
The ground Bedded Bliss covers makes for an interesting read—and attests to the ground that a married couple can cover over the course of a long sex life. Wright pulls off a difficult balancing act: she brings up many, many possible directions for married couples to go while at the same time affirming the value of too-often-maligned vanilla sex. The book is gentle but exciting, far-reaching and open-minded without making the reader feel as if spicing up the sex life requires a fat bank account and the flexibility of a member of Cirque du Soleil.
It's a very intimate book, and this is the thing I liked best about it. Wright and her contributors all open up about their own sex lives, and that makes the erotic fiction she includes feel all the more intimate in turn. Many contributors have more than one story in the collection, and I liked the effect—it made me feel as if I knew them better to see them presenting couples from several angles. In many cases, the stories seem more autobiographical than fictional. The writers often use first-person POV, along with the names of their actual spouses. In other cases, they use consistent characters over several stories, such as Jeremy Edwards' Mel and Lawrence or Heidi Champa's Duncan and Lena.
I also appreciated the inclusion of male writers in this book—they didn't make up fifty percent, but there were a higher proportion of them than in many collections of erotica that I've read. Considering the goals and subject matter of this book, I think it's important to have that perspective.
Some of the strengths of Bedded Bliss, however, can also become liabilities. Its wide subject matter can seem like a lack of focus at times. The material was all hot and interesting, but I couldn't always keep track of the through line. The book's chapters generally follow a format: a short essay from Wright, some exercises a couple could try, and erotic fiction related to the essay. As I read, however, the chapters ran together, and I wasn't always sure what was being demonstrated. In some cases I couldn't clearly see the distinction between one chapter and another. The last chapter in particular threw me. It contained many more erotic stories than the others and came off as a catch-all, a place to put the miscellany that hadn't fit well elsewhere.
This phenomenon was made more problematic because I read the Kindle edition of this book. The navigation and table of contents in the electronic version left much to be desired, and I often wished for the physical book instead. It would have helped me to be able to flip back and forth easily. This is the sort of book that made me want to make connections—to read stories in a different order than the one they're presented in, to skip around, to scan and explore. It particularly annoyed me that the Kindle Edition's table of contents did not list the erotic fiction titles and authors.
I have mixed feelings about how Bedded Bliss handled the reality of non-heterosexual married couples. There was one story by Evan Mora, a woman in a long-term lesbian relationship. I was glad to see it, but it was included in that random chapter at the end, so I'm not sure most non-heterosexual readers would get far enough to know it's there. The book could be read by a non-heterosexual couple, I suppose, but until I reached Mora's story, it had screamed heterosexual to me. Considering the inclusion of Mora's story, I wished there had been a paragraph or two in the introduction that made a point of welcoming LGBTQ readers to the table, and (in for a penny, in for a pound) a greater commitment to telling the stories of married couples outside the heteronormative spectrum. As it was, Mora's story struck me as too little, too late.
Another interesting but mixed feature of Bedded Bliss is that it's pretty clear it's aimed at couples who are currently happy or at least have a very strong foundation. For a reader who feels generally positive toward his or her spouse, the language of the book will likely feel affirming and encouraging. For a reader who's having deeper problems, this same language may be incredibly off-putting.
For example, Wright says, "If the idea of sharing your deepest, darkest sexual fantasies with your spouse sends you running into the closet, consider this: you got married because, in addition to being the love of your life and sexy as hell, this is the person you trust most in the world. Right?"
I've been married twice, so I read that passage with two sets of eyes. The current me can answer yes to that question (I am happily married this time, so far). In my previous marriage, however, that question would have filled me with helpless frustration.
I think it's good for a book like this to exist, one that tries to help marriages long before they're broken, or to help people build on something that's already good. Bedded Bliss does acknowledge in places, however, that there are limits to this approach and some relationships may not work out.
In the end, I think Bedded Bliss may not have matched the heights of its ambition, but the result is still a book that will be very sexy and valuable to many people. This book fills an important niche that's rarely served (the only similar book I can think of is Alison Tyler's Never Have the Same Sex Twice). Wright and her contributors are wise about marriage, encouraging and realistic, rich with experience to share. They offer some necessary pushback against media-driven images of who gets to have good sex and what good sex is. They demonstrate how each couple must define for themselves what it means to have a sexually satisfying relationship. That's important, and I'm glad to have read this book.
Disclosures: This post is part of the official blog tour for Bedded Bliss. I write for Cleis Press, and have been edited by Kristina Wright. However, I purchased my own copy of Bedded Bliss, and the opinions I've expressed are my own.
October 21, 2023
I registered this book at BookCrossing.com! BCID: 311-17032363
http://bookcrossing.com/journal/17032363/
Update:
I revisited this book and read the rest of the stories.
Original review:
I won a copy of "Bedded Bliss: A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After" edited by Kristina Wright in a non-Goodreads giveaway. This book is a self-help and sexuality book that uses memoir and erotica to offer relationship advice. I'm not a big fan of erotica in general because most of the erotica I've read is corny and unrealistic. I doubt I would have bought or read this book if I hadn't won a free copy.
However, I found this book very relatable and accessible to couples in any stage of a relationship and adults of all ages. The chapters and stories are short and easy to read. Each chapter addresses true struggles that real relationships are likely to face at some point. Some of these relationship changes include financial hardship, sharing fantasies, using sex toys, exploring kink and fetishes, and intimacy and sex after children. At the end of each chapter, there is a short list of practical suggestions for increasing intimacy and spontaneity. The stories are much more realistic than erotica like "Fifty Shades of Grey." (I honestly read all three books in that trilogy, but by the third book, I wanted to finish the trilogy mainly to prove to myself that I could follow through.)
Overall, I'm glad I read "Bedded Bliss: A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After." I picked my way through the stories and chose to read at least one from each chapter. Some of my favorites are "The Weight of Things" by Kristina Wright about female body image issues and "Upcycling" by Kate Dominic and "The Next Best Thing" by Heidi Champa, which are both about enduring financial hardship. I'm not likely to read this book again or go back and read the stories I skipped the first time, but it's not full of the movie sex I typically find in most erotica.
http://bookcrossing.com/journal/17032363/
Update:
I revisited this book and read the rest of the stories.
Original review:
I won a copy of "Bedded Bliss: A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After" edited by Kristina Wright in a non-Goodreads giveaway. This book is a self-help and sexuality book that uses memoir and erotica to offer relationship advice. I'm not a big fan of erotica in general because most of the erotica I've read is corny and unrealistic. I doubt I would have bought or read this book if I hadn't won a free copy.
However, I found this book very relatable and accessible to couples in any stage of a relationship and adults of all ages. The chapters and stories are short and easy to read. Each chapter addresses true struggles that real relationships are likely to face at some point. Some of these relationship changes include financial hardship, sharing fantasies, using sex toys, exploring kink and fetishes, and intimacy and sex after children. At the end of each chapter, there is a short list of practical suggestions for increasing intimacy and spontaneity. The stories are much more realistic than erotica like "Fifty Shades of Grey." (I honestly read all three books in that trilogy, but by the third book, I wanted to finish the trilogy mainly to prove to myself that I could follow through.)
Overall, I'm glad I read "Bedded Bliss: A Couple's Guide to Lust Ever After." I picked my way through the stories and chose to read at least one from each chapter. Some of my favorites are "The Weight of Things" by Kristina Wright about female body image issues and "Upcycling" by Kate Dominic and "The Next Best Thing" by Heidi Champa, which are both about enduring financial hardship. I'm not likely to read this book again or go back and read the stories I skipped the first time, but it's not full of the movie sex I typically find in most erotica.
November 27, 2013
Fun edutainment (education + entertainment = edutainment) and sex read. Anyone with half a brain and a willingness to embrace experimentation won't need the offered "advice" of this anthology, but it's a fun reminder nevertheless. If you're looking for sweet, old-fashioned, bordering-on-sappy romance with some heat, you should get this book. I enjoyed all but a few of them (chalk it up to personal preferences), and it's always a pleasure to read work from some of my favorite erotica authors (e.g., Kristina Wright, Jeremy Edwards, Sommer Marsden, Donna George Storey and Heidi Champa).
Bedded, more so than a lot of erotica anthologies, deserves to be purchased for its altruistic aim alone - factor in the hot writing on these pages, and you've got a winner worth purchasing.
(This review originally appeared on the Reading & Writing By Pub Light site.)
Bedded, more so than a lot of erotica anthologies, deserves to be purchased for its altruistic aim alone - factor in the hot writing on these pages, and you've got a winner worth purchasing.
(This review originally appeared on the Reading & Writing By Pub Light site.)
May 7, 2014
A beautifully written collection of stories that also in some cases read like sweet memories, friendly encouragement, and passionate fantasies. Kristina Wright has gathered a book of fiction and essays that speak of the passion and heat and commemorate the best of the physical bonds and intimacy that grow between long-time lovers.
The pieces run the gamut from playful to bittersweet; all delight in the pleasures that come from knowing your partner intimately, in the best of ways. Some stories will elicit smiles; others may bring tears. Nearly all will rev motors even as they acknowledge the realities of a long-term relationship and its downs and ups.
Part inspiration, part self-help guide, this is the perfect book to enjoy as a bedtime story. What would make the read even better is sharing this with your own long-time lover and exploring your own bedded bliss!
The pieces run the gamut from playful to bittersweet; all delight in the pleasures that come from knowing your partner intimately, in the best of ways. Some stories will elicit smiles; others may bring tears. Nearly all will rev motors even as they acknowledge the realities of a long-term relationship and its downs and ups.
Part inspiration, part self-help guide, this is the perfect book to enjoy as a bedtime story. What would make the read even better is sharing this with your own long-time lover and exploring your own bedded bliss!
October 25, 2016
Trigger Warnings: Mixed relationships, graphic sex.
This book was not what I was expecting. I picked it up hoping to find a good self-help book for a friend in a tough situation in her marriage, but wanted to read it first. (I never recommend a book I haven't read.) I clearly didn't read the synopsis and just went with the title because what I ended up with was a sexy, lusty book filled with sweet and steamy stories about long-term relationships and the ups and downs and joys of passion. I admit I was looking for more self-help and less sex. I don't usually enjoy erotic books, because it seems so silly and forced and the sex is so fake. But these stories felt real. Like real people having real intimate moments. It was actually pretty beautiful. And it may or may not have sparked some moments with my own husband. ;-)
This book was not what I was expecting. I picked it up hoping to find a good self-help book for a friend in a tough situation in her marriage, but wanted to read it first. (I never recommend a book I haven't read.) I clearly didn't read the synopsis and just went with the title because what I ended up with was a sexy, lusty book filled with sweet and steamy stories about long-term relationships and the ups and downs and joys of passion. I admit I was looking for more self-help and less sex. I don't usually enjoy erotic books, because it seems so silly and forced and the sex is so fake. But these stories felt real. Like real people having real intimate moments. It was actually pretty beautiful. And it may or may not have sparked some moments with my own husband. ;-)
January 26, 2014
The advice is a good reminder for most couples but I found myself skipping most of the stories. It's sexy and the couples are real but I think that's part of what makes their stories, dare I say, boring. Its real sex, with real couples most of whom are having some sort of issue w/ sex and what they did about it.
June 30, 2014
Great advice for building a sexally satisfying long term relationship. Not boring or overly involved, just easy and fun to read!
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews