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How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby: Fully revised and updated
For almost forty years, How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby has been the standard reference for couples trying to increase their chances of having the son or daughter they hope for. In this new edition of their classic book, Dr. Shettles and David Rorvik provide authoritative scientific studies and compelling anecdotal evidence demonstrating that the Shettles method continues to produce results unmatched by any other method. Dozens of testimonials confirm its ease of use and rate of success.
How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby explains the simple, at-home, noninvasive Shettles method and presents detailed steps to take to conceive a child of a specific gender. The properly applied Shettles method gives couples a 75 percent or better chance of having a child of the desired sex. Some researchers have reported success rates of up to 90 percent!
How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby explains the simple, at-home, noninvasive Shettles method and presents detailed steps to take to conceive a child of a specific gender. The properly applied Shettles method gives couples a 75 percent or better chance of having a child of the desired sex. Some researchers have reported success rates of up to 90 percent!
256 pages, Paperback
First published October 10, 2006
195 people are currently reading
472 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews
June 20, 2018
Shettles' method came up recently on the interwebs, so I thought I'd post a review of this while I remember the title. I'm still suspicious about whether it actually works, but our success rate is 100% for a single baby. I proposed larger sample sizes for more rigorous testing. Unfortunately, Esteemed Spouse says no.
The book includes interesting , and apparently accurate information about ovulation and other fertility topics, so at the very least it is not entirely full of hokum.
All in all, "How To Choose the Sex of Your Baby" is more likely to be useful than the multiply-photocopied Chinese astrological chart someone slipped to us.
The book includes interesting , and apparently accurate information about ovulation and other fertility topics, so at the very least it is not entirely full of hokum.
All in all, "How To Choose the Sex of Your Baby" is more likely to be useful than the multiply-photocopied Chinese astrological chart someone slipped to us.
November 15, 2011
This book was fantastic because of the precise and well written information, just as much as for the method it describes. If you're thinking about getting pregnant, even if you're not interested in choosing the sex of your baby, I would recommend reading this book. There's nothing explicit or uncomfortable in the subject matter. Every topic is handled with clinical professionalism and scientific data, but the tone remains friendly and isn't heavy with scientific jargon.
That being said, most of the book is skimmable and not pertinent to how to conceive a girl or a boy. Dr. Shettles's chosen author spends a lot of time fluffing Dr. Shettles's ego. The reason I'm reading this book in the first place is because of the excellent testimonials of friends - three women who had boys after using this method.
I'm including my notes in this review - not everyone has time to read 200 pages. If you don't read the book, my notes will help you out, but don't blame me when you don't get the boy or girl you wanted. The best information is in the book, and the best way to use Dr. Shettles's method is by reading his book.
The Physiology of Sperm
The male sperm is lighter, faster, and round headed. It is also more fragile and subject to heat, toxins, and other risk factors. The female sperm is slower but hardier with a more oval head.
The Cervical Mucus Method for Detecting Ovulation
The CM is considered the best indicator of ovulation. Usually the day after or a few days after bleeding stops, CM is secreted. At the beginning of the cycle, CM is cloudier, thick, and less abundant. The CM gradually thins and becomes more transparent until its peak at ovulation. At this point it is thin, wet, elastic and abundant, resembling in appearance and consistency raw egg white. Then, CM abruptly changes back to its thick and cloudy form. This occurs either just before, during, or just after ovulation – no one is quite sure.
To sample your CM, usually you can wipe the outer portion of the vagina with a clean tissue after urinating. If you have CM, it will be evident on the tissue. If no CM is apparent, you can “probe” for it using clean hands. Put your right foot on a chair or stool and lean forward slightly to put your right elbow on your right knee. Gently press on your abdomen above the pubis with your left hand – this pushes the cervix forward, making it easier to reach. Using your middle and index finger, swab the cervix – it should feel a little like the tip of your nose. If there’s any CM, you should be able to retrieve it. Most people should not need to probe for CM, though.
Things that mess up your ability to read your CM: the Pill or any other type of birth control, contraceptive foams or jellies, and seminal fluid.
To sum up, watch for mucus starting on day 9. (Day 1 is the first day of bleeding.) Check for mucus after each urination. Don’t worry about the amount, just the color and consistency. Starting on day 10, use the “stretch test.” Put some CM between your thumb and forefinger and slowly separate. Make a note of how far the mucus stretches before breaking. The mucus probably only stretches an inch or so. CM will become wetter feeling and more stretchy as days pass. Typically by day 13 it should be like raw egg white – clear and very slippery. It is very elastic and stretches many inches without breaking. There may be a lot of secretions. It is probably the peak day, but keep collecting data. On day 14, CM is probably still clear and slippery. Peak symptoms persist commonly between one and two days and rarely only for a few hours. You should immediately be able to see in your CM when the peak time is over. It becomes thick and cloudy again. Ovulation has occurred or is occurring or is about to occur. A few days of cloudy mucus are followed by dry days until the cycle begins again.
Try to do 3 or more months of practice cycles until you feel confident. Keep a chart with the date, day of your cycle and observations – “B” for bleeding, “D” for dry, “M” for mucus, and “M-O” for ovulation, the “M” again for mucus after ovulation. Since you’ll be checking several times a day, note below your chart if the quality of the mucus changed during the day. This is most especially important if your mucus changes to its peak during the day or changes thick and cloudy after ovulation during the day.
Be aware that CM patterns can change from month to month, especially in response to illness, stress, tension, diet, exercise, eating, etc. Some women have a few wet days followed by a few dry days and then more wet days again. Use common sense and pay attention to the quality of the CM if you fit in this category. For example, if it occurs both on day 9 and on day 16, day 16 is the more normal and thus more likely day of ovulation. Most women average 6 days from the start of CM to ovulation.
Basal Body Temperature Method
Estrogen keeps the body’s temperatures low, but after ovulation, progesterone causes a rise in temperature. Chart the date, day of your cycle, and temperature. Take your temperature as you wake while still in bed – do nothing else first. Keep hands off the thermometer and be still until it is done. BBT is also subject to changes from month to month and from changes in lifestyle or illness.
When charting your temperature, watch for the sudden upward temperature shift that remains until the end of your cycle. The temperature spike should be at least four-tenths of a degree. It is common for body temperature to dip a little just before the sudden rise in temperature. The sharp rise in temperature indicates that ovulation has occurred, is occurring, or is about to occur. Most think ovulation occurs at the small dip in temperature.
Ten to fifteen percent of women won’t see clear cut data. The temperature spike might be split across 2 or 3 days, so use other data to evaluate the BBT chart. For example, if your BBT rose over days 15, 16, and 17, and you have CM data for those days that showed clear stretchy CM on days 15 & 16 but cloudy on day 17, it probably occurred on day 16.
Ovulations Kits
It is still debated how far before ovulation luteinizing hormone surges, and it may vary greatly from person to person. The window of 12 to 44 hours that LH appears before ovulation is too wide to use LH for sex selection when used as the package directs. Dr. Shettles doesn’t encourage using this test because CM and BBT are better indicators and LH tests can be expensive.
If you’re going to use an ovulation kit, test twice a day. The best time to test is between 11 am and 3 pm. The second best time is between 5 pm and 10 pm. The worst time to test is between 5 am and 8 am. Dr. Shettles recommends testing as far apart as possible while staying within the two best time periods, like at noon and 10 pm. Test at the same time every day. This allows you to detect the surge as closely as possible to when it begins, not the morning after.
The test systems continue to detect LH for 2-3 days, ceasing only when progesterone kicks in. The best studies indicate ovulation occurs 30 hours after the onset of the LH surge. The LH surge begins in the blood several hours before it shows up the in the urine, so you can generally assume that ovulation will occur about 24 hours after the LH surge is first detected.
Even after the LH surge is detected, continue to test once or twice daily just to see how long the surge lasts. Correlate this data with your observations from the CM and BBT methods. If conflicting data arises when compared to the CM or BBT methods, always go with the CM while using common sense. You can always test another month. You can stop testing once the test says your surge is over.
Other Ovulation Indicators
About fifteen percent of women experience Mittelschmerz pain indicating ovulation.
Trying for a boy
TIMING is the single most important factor in sex selection. Everything else can be done according to Dr. Shettles's recommendations, but if your timing is off, your results probably will be too.
Time intercourse for the day of ovulation, and if possible, within 12 hours. Even if intercourse takes place several hours before ovulation happens, but with a day of it, the odds are in favor of the male producing sperm.
Wait 6 months after discontinuing the pill, a few months after removing an IUD, and do not use contraceptive foams or jellies. Only a condom should be used to prevent pregnancy while detecting ovulation.
Timing intercourse based on BBT: If a woman takes her temperature, recognizes the dip, and is fairly certain the sharp rise will happen the following morning, intercourse should be timed for that evening, before the rise in temperature. If a woman is unsure, but detects the sharp rise the following morning, intercourse should occur that morning the rise is detected. If you are confident about your dip, intercourse in the afternoon or evening would be better than waiting until the next morning. Your best chances for having a boy are in the 12 hours before ovulation occurs. But chances are still significant 24 hours before ovulation.
Don’t have sex any later than the morning of your temperature spike. Use CM to determine when ovulation has already occurred. When your CM returns to being thick and cloudy, it’s too late to conceive a boy. If you’ve been checking every few hours and notice this abrupt change, do not have intercourse.
When to have intercourse based on CM observations: Chart several cycles to see how long your peak symptoms last – probably a day and a half – and time intercourse as near as possible to the end of that peak period using the guidelines given earlier. Twelve hours before ovulation is ideal but anytime 24 hours before ovulation should increase chances for a boy.
Combining BBT and CM: For a woman with a consistent cycle, if you take your temperature and are fairly certain today is your dip and your CM just reached its peak and usually stays at the peak for a day and a half, wait for intercourse. The next morning, if you’ve had your expected rise in temperature but your CM is still great, have intercourse immediately.
For a woman with an irregular cycle, more guessing is required. Try to correlate temperature readings with CM observations regardless of what exact day in the cycle they occur on. When you’re CM is at its peak and your temperature is still low-ish, wait as long as you can without your mucus turning thick and cloudy. Before it turns, have intercourse. The example woman in the book had intercourse the night before her rise in temperature.
Using LH testing: If you test mid-day and have a negative result, but are positive in the evening, assume you will ovulate 24 hours after your positive test. Have intercourse sometime during the 12 hours before ovulation; mid-day would be best.
To review: Have intercourse during the 24 hour period between the temperature dip and the temperature rise. Use CM to pinpoint the exact time of intercourse, but do not rely on it if it occurs at odd times during your cycle. If you have more than one day of peak CM, the last day is probably your ovulation day. Do not have intercourse after the mucus becomes thick and cloudy, but try to be as close to this change as possible. Remember, if this was an exact science, everyone would be doing it. Collect as much data as possible to be as confident as you can.
Abstain from male ejaculation for at least four days to increase sperm count, longer if it can be done without spontaneous ejaculation. Except for the one time intercourse is done for the purpose of getting pregnant, use condoms.
A few instructions for the men: Men should avoid overheating their testes. Dr. Shettles cites people who drive in heated vehicles all day, hot baths, men who work in front of ovens or furnaces all day, etc. Tight fitting underwear is also bad. Even things like stress, sickness – like the flu, toxic chemicals, medication, drugs, etc. can lower sperm count and kill off the male sperm.
One drug is recommended for increasing sperm speed and likelihood of male progeny: caffeine. Dr. Shettles recommends drinking 3-4 cups of coffee 15-30 minutes before intercourse if trying for a boy. Other sources of caffeine would also work. Avoid caffeine at other times, however, because it can reduce total sperm count. I did some outside research and according to the Mayo clinic, a normal cup of coffee has about 100 mg of caffeine. Mountain Dew is the most caffeinated soft drink they list with about 50 mg caffeine per can (12 ounces). 5 hour energy has the most caffeine for energy drinks with 200 mg per 2 ounces. Excedrin and NoDoz also have caffeine, but you’d have to overdose on Excedrin to get enough. NoDoz has 200 mg caffeine.
The pH environment of the cervix
Most women secrete alkaline CM and have an alkaline environment receptive to sperm as ovulation approaches. Rarely, a woman has an overly acidic condition with highly acidic secretions most of the time. A woman with this condition would have other symptoms of too much acid like “acid stomach” or ulcers. Other symptoms might include CM that is always thick, cloudy, and not very stretchable and in poor supply. This may need a doctor’s advice to correct. If you think you are overly acidic or you have frequent vaginal infections, which produce or accompany acidic secretions, ask your doctor about using a baking soda douche.
The way the topic of douching is handled in the book gives the impression that this is one of the most criticized (or maybe even lawsuit worthy) part of the Shettles’s method. But he does manage to sneak the recipe in for a baking soda douche (in the Q&A chapter), after first citing the necessity of talking to your doctor. There is some data that douching can result in pelvic inflammatory disease, especially with frequent douching. Keep in mind that this practice carries some risk.
The best way to increase the alkalinity of the cervix is the female orgasm, either at the same time or preceding the male orgasm. Both the secretions and the orgasmic contractions help transport sperm into the cervix. Multiple orgasms that preceded male orgasm are better yet but not necessary. Female orgasm is helpful but not crucial.
Two more factors
Deep penetration by the man is best for depositing the sperm closest to the cervix where secretions are more favorable for male-producing sperm. Vaginal penetration from the rear is also recommended because this allows the sperm entry near the opening of the cervix and not on either side in the cul-de-sac or the posterior fornix.
To Have a Girl
It is harder to try to have a girl than to have a boy. Once you’ve figured out when you ovulate, you need to have intercourse as far away from ovulation as you can and still have the sperm survive. You could try as far out as four days before ovulation, but three days would probably work. If unsuccessful, try again or move intercourse closer to ovulation in 12 hour periods. If three days doesn’t work, try two and a half days before ovulation and so on.
Using CM when trying for a girl: Err on the side of caution, having intercourse 2 days before peak CM symptoms occur. Use patience and common sense, and eventually you may have to try having intercourse the day before peak symptoms happen.
Using BBT when trying for a girl: Again, err on the side of caution, and assume the last low temperature (the dip) is the probable time of ovulation. It probably isn’t actually until later, but schedule intercourse for three days prior to that anyway. After trying on that day two months, move in a day closer to ovulation.
If your cycle is irregular: If you really want a girl and your cycle is irregular, the only solution is to exercise patience. If the length of your cycle varies greatly month to month, you can try using 1 of 2 formulas.
The first formula is to take your earliest ovulation date from all your data and subtract 3 days to get the day of your cycle you should have intercourse on for a girl. The second formula is to take the length of your shortest cycle and subtract 17 days to get the day of your cycle you should have intercourse on to try for a girl.
This method may not work for several months, but if you have the time and don’t mind waiting for a girl, it should work. Try at least 2-3 months before inching closer to your potential ovulation. Move in by periods of 12 hours. For example, if trying on the evening of day 13 didn’t work for 3 months, try the morning of day 14 for another few months. Dr Shettles warns that condoms, and not any other form of birth control, should be used the entire time ovulation is possible.
Using Ovulation Kits when trying for a girl: Intercourse should stop at least the day before the LH surge is detected in the urine. Having sex even the day before would put a couple in the “boy zone.” Dr. Shettles recommends testing twice a day to detect the surge and understanding all the advice for conceiving a boy so those trying for a girl know what not to do. He further warns that if you’re pretty sure you’re in the safe zone, your LH surge hasn’t been detected, but you’re experiencing “peak” CM symptoms, you’re still at risk for conceiving a boy.
If at all possible, use CM, BBT, and LH surge data in concert to best determine when to conceive a girl. He does mention one more helpful study (that needs verification) that the LH surge is most likely to occur in the morning hours in the spring and summer and in the evening during fall and winter.
The sum up: Have sex with condoms during practice cycles and after your attempt to conceive a girl. When trying for a girl, have sex daily from the time bleeding ends until the cutoff day – four, three, or two days before ovulation. Abstain from sex completely until a few days after ovulation has passed because intercourse may stimulate female secretions that favor male sperm.
In the past, Dr. Shettles has recommended a douche that would help the womb be more acidic and favorable to female sperm. He no longer recommends these through his book, but directs you to consult with your physician. He states that the douches never harmed any woman using them, but he no longer recommends them as part of his method.
Intercourse Recommendations: Dr. Shettles says the “missionary position” makes it less likely the male sperm will be deposited near the cervix. Shallow penetration will deposit the sperm in the more acidic vaginal canal, favoring the female sperm. Finally, the woman should avoid orgasm, if possible, so the alkaline secretions that favor male sperm will not emitted, nor will the orgasmic muscle contractions that help propel the sperm towards the egg.
One last note – avoid caffeine. Studies of women who drink coffee suggests that it reduces fertility, even if drinking only one or two cups a day. Other studies indicate that caffeine can also lead to miscarriage. Smoking and alcohol can also reduce fertility in both men and women.
Q&A highlights
If you have very scanty cervical secretions, you can use over-the-counter cough syrup that contains only guaifenesin - absolutely no codeine. If trying for a boy, take it for the 3-4 days before intercourse.
2. It is more likely that women ovulate 14 days from the end of their cycle than 14 days from the beginning of their cycle. Keep this in mind when calculating your ovulation data.
That being said, most of the book is skimmable and not pertinent to how to conceive a girl or a boy. Dr. Shettles's chosen author spends a lot of time fluffing Dr. Shettles's ego. The reason I'm reading this book in the first place is because of the excellent testimonials of friends - three women who had boys after using this method.
I'm including my notes in this review - not everyone has time to read 200 pages. If you don't read the book, my notes will help you out, but don't blame me when you don't get the boy or girl you wanted. The best information is in the book, and the best way to use Dr. Shettles's method is by reading his book.
The Physiology of Sperm
The male sperm is lighter, faster, and round headed. It is also more fragile and subject to heat, toxins, and other risk factors. The female sperm is slower but hardier with a more oval head.
The Cervical Mucus Method for Detecting Ovulation
The CM is considered the best indicator of ovulation. Usually the day after or a few days after bleeding stops, CM is secreted. At the beginning of the cycle, CM is cloudier, thick, and less abundant. The CM gradually thins and becomes more transparent until its peak at ovulation. At this point it is thin, wet, elastic and abundant, resembling in appearance and consistency raw egg white. Then, CM abruptly changes back to its thick and cloudy form. This occurs either just before, during, or just after ovulation – no one is quite sure.
To sample your CM, usually you can wipe the outer portion of the vagina with a clean tissue after urinating. If you have CM, it will be evident on the tissue. If no CM is apparent, you can “probe” for it using clean hands. Put your right foot on a chair or stool and lean forward slightly to put your right elbow on your right knee. Gently press on your abdomen above the pubis with your left hand – this pushes the cervix forward, making it easier to reach. Using your middle and index finger, swab the cervix – it should feel a little like the tip of your nose. If there’s any CM, you should be able to retrieve it. Most people should not need to probe for CM, though.
Things that mess up your ability to read your CM: the Pill or any other type of birth control, contraceptive foams or jellies, and seminal fluid.
To sum up, watch for mucus starting on day 9. (Day 1 is the first day of bleeding.) Check for mucus after each urination. Don’t worry about the amount, just the color and consistency. Starting on day 10, use the “stretch test.” Put some CM between your thumb and forefinger and slowly separate. Make a note of how far the mucus stretches before breaking. The mucus probably only stretches an inch or so. CM will become wetter feeling and more stretchy as days pass. Typically by day 13 it should be like raw egg white – clear and very slippery. It is very elastic and stretches many inches without breaking. There may be a lot of secretions. It is probably the peak day, but keep collecting data. On day 14, CM is probably still clear and slippery. Peak symptoms persist commonly between one and two days and rarely only for a few hours. You should immediately be able to see in your CM when the peak time is over. It becomes thick and cloudy again. Ovulation has occurred or is occurring or is about to occur. A few days of cloudy mucus are followed by dry days until the cycle begins again.
Try to do 3 or more months of practice cycles until you feel confident. Keep a chart with the date, day of your cycle and observations – “B” for bleeding, “D” for dry, “M” for mucus, and “M-O” for ovulation, the “M” again for mucus after ovulation. Since you’ll be checking several times a day, note below your chart if the quality of the mucus changed during the day. This is most especially important if your mucus changes to its peak during the day or changes thick and cloudy after ovulation during the day.
Be aware that CM patterns can change from month to month, especially in response to illness, stress, tension, diet, exercise, eating, etc. Some women have a few wet days followed by a few dry days and then more wet days again. Use common sense and pay attention to the quality of the CM if you fit in this category. For example, if it occurs both on day 9 and on day 16, day 16 is the more normal and thus more likely day of ovulation. Most women average 6 days from the start of CM to ovulation.
Basal Body Temperature Method
Estrogen keeps the body’s temperatures low, but after ovulation, progesterone causes a rise in temperature. Chart the date, day of your cycle, and temperature. Take your temperature as you wake while still in bed – do nothing else first. Keep hands off the thermometer and be still until it is done. BBT is also subject to changes from month to month and from changes in lifestyle or illness.
When charting your temperature, watch for the sudden upward temperature shift that remains until the end of your cycle. The temperature spike should be at least four-tenths of a degree. It is common for body temperature to dip a little just before the sudden rise in temperature. The sharp rise in temperature indicates that ovulation has occurred, is occurring, or is about to occur. Most think ovulation occurs at the small dip in temperature.
Ten to fifteen percent of women won’t see clear cut data. The temperature spike might be split across 2 or 3 days, so use other data to evaluate the BBT chart. For example, if your BBT rose over days 15, 16, and 17, and you have CM data for those days that showed clear stretchy CM on days 15 & 16 but cloudy on day 17, it probably occurred on day 16.
Ovulations Kits
It is still debated how far before ovulation luteinizing hormone surges, and it may vary greatly from person to person. The window of 12 to 44 hours that LH appears before ovulation is too wide to use LH for sex selection when used as the package directs. Dr. Shettles doesn’t encourage using this test because CM and BBT are better indicators and LH tests can be expensive.
If you’re going to use an ovulation kit, test twice a day. The best time to test is between 11 am and 3 pm. The second best time is between 5 pm and 10 pm. The worst time to test is between 5 am and 8 am. Dr. Shettles recommends testing as far apart as possible while staying within the two best time periods, like at noon and 10 pm. Test at the same time every day. This allows you to detect the surge as closely as possible to when it begins, not the morning after.
The test systems continue to detect LH for 2-3 days, ceasing only when progesterone kicks in. The best studies indicate ovulation occurs 30 hours after the onset of the LH surge. The LH surge begins in the blood several hours before it shows up the in the urine, so you can generally assume that ovulation will occur about 24 hours after the LH surge is first detected.
Even after the LH surge is detected, continue to test once or twice daily just to see how long the surge lasts. Correlate this data with your observations from the CM and BBT methods. If conflicting data arises when compared to the CM or BBT methods, always go with the CM while using common sense. You can always test another month. You can stop testing once the test says your surge is over.
Other Ovulation Indicators
About fifteen percent of women experience Mittelschmerz pain indicating ovulation.
Trying for a boy
TIMING is the single most important factor in sex selection. Everything else can be done according to Dr. Shettles's recommendations, but if your timing is off, your results probably will be too.
Time intercourse for the day of ovulation, and if possible, within 12 hours. Even if intercourse takes place several hours before ovulation happens, but with a day of it, the odds are in favor of the male producing sperm.
Wait 6 months after discontinuing the pill, a few months after removing an IUD, and do not use contraceptive foams or jellies. Only a condom should be used to prevent pregnancy while detecting ovulation.
Timing intercourse based on BBT: If a woman takes her temperature, recognizes the dip, and is fairly certain the sharp rise will happen the following morning, intercourse should be timed for that evening, before the rise in temperature. If a woman is unsure, but detects the sharp rise the following morning, intercourse should occur that morning the rise is detected. If you are confident about your dip, intercourse in the afternoon or evening would be better than waiting until the next morning. Your best chances for having a boy are in the 12 hours before ovulation occurs. But chances are still significant 24 hours before ovulation.
Don’t have sex any later than the morning of your temperature spike. Use CM to determine when ovulation has already occurred. When your CM returns to being thick and cloudy, it’s too late to conceive a boy. If you’ve been checking every few hours and notice this abrupt change, do not have intercourse.
When to have intercourse based on CM observations: Chart several cycles to see how long your peak symptoms last – probably a day and a half – and time intercourse as near as possible to the end of that peak period using the guidelines given earlier. Twelve hours before ovulation is ideal but anytime 24 hours before ovulation should increase chances for a boy.
Combining BBT and CM: For a woman with a consistent cycle, if you take your temperature and are fairly certain today is your dip and your CM just reached its peak and usually stays at the peak for a day and a half, wait for intercourse. The next morning, if you’ve had your expected rise in temperature but your CM is still great, have intercourse immediately.
For a woman with an irregular cycle, more guessing is required. Try to correlate temperature readings with CM observations regardless of what exact day in the cycle they occur on. When you’re CM is at its peak and your temperature is still low-ish, wait as long as you can without your mucus turning thick and cloudy. Before it turns, have intercourse. The example woman in the book had intercourse the night before her rise in temperature.
Using LH testing: If you test mid-day and have a negative result, but are positive in the evening, assume you will ovulate 24 hours after your positive test. Have intercourse sometime during the 12 hours before ovulation; mid-day would be best.
To review: Have intercourse during the 24 hour period between the temperature dip and the temperature rise. Use CM to pinpoint the exact time of intercourse, but do not rely on it if it occurs at odd times during your cycle. If you have more than one day of peak CM, the last day is probably your ovulation day. Do not have intercourse after the mucus becomes thick and cloudy, but try to be as close to this change as possible. Remember, if this was an exact science, everyone would be doing it. Collect as much data as possible to be as confident as you can.
Abstain from male ejaculation for at least four days to increase sperm count, longer if it can be done without spontaneous ejaculation. Except for the one time intercourse is done for the purpose of getting pregnant, use condoms.
A few instructions for the men: Men should avoid overheating their testes. Dr. Shettles cites people who drive in heated vehicles all day, hot baths, men who work in front of ovens or furnaces all day, etc. Tight fitting underwear is also bad. Even things like stress, sickness – like the flu, toxic chemicals, medication, drugs, etc. can lower sperm count and kill off the male sperm.
One drug is recommended for increasing sperm speed and likelihood of male progeny: caffeine. Dr. Shettles recommends drinking 3-4 cups of coffee 15-30 minutes before intercourse if trying for a boy. Other sources of caffeine would also work. Avoid caffeine at other times, however, because it can reduce total sperm count. I did some outside research and according to the Mayo clinic, a normal cup of coffee has about 100 mg of caffeine. Mountain Dew is the most caffeinated soft drink they list with about 50 mg caffeine per can (12 ounces). 5 hour energy has the most caffeine for energy drinks with 200 mg per 2 ounces. Excedrin and NoDoz also have caffeine, but you’d have to overdose on Excedrin to get enough. NoDoz has 200 mg caffeine.
The pH environment of the cervix
Most women secrete alkaline CM and have an alkaline environment receptive to sperm as ovulation approaches. Rarely, a woman has an overly acidic condition with highly acidic secretions most of the time. A woman with this condition would have other symptoms of too much acid like “acid stomach” or ulcers. Other symptoms might include CM that is always thick, cloudy, and not very stretchable and in poor supply. This may need a doctor’s advice to correct. If you think you are overly acidic or you have frequent vaginal infections, which produce or accompany acidic secretions, ask your doctor about using a baking soda douche.
The way the topic of douching is handled in the book gives the impression that this is one of the most criticized (or maybe even lawsuit worthy) part of the Shettles’s method. But he does manage to sneak the recipe in for a baking soda douche (in the Q&A chapter), after first citing the necessity of talking to your doctor. There is some data that douching can result in pelvic inflammatory disease, especially with frequent douching. Keep in mind that this practice carries some risk.
The best way to increase the alkalinity of the cervix is the female orgasm, either at the same time or preceding the male orgasm. Both the secretions and the orgasmic contractions help transport sperm into the cervix. Multiple orgasms that preceded male orgasm are better yet but not necessary. Female orgasm is helpful but not crucial.
Two more factors
Deep penetration by the man is best for depositing the sperm closest to the cervix where secretions are more favorable for male-producing sperm. Vaginal penetration from the rear is also recommended because this allows the sperm entry near the opening of the cervix and not on either side in the cul-de-sac or the posterior fornix.
To Have a Girl
It is harder to try to have a girl than to have a boy. Once you’ve figured out when you ovulate, you need to have intercourse as far away from ovulation as you can and still have the sperm survive. You could try as far out as four days before ovulation, but three days would probably work. If unsuccessful, try again or move intercourse closer to ovulation in 12 hour periods. If three days doesn’t work, try two and a half days before ovulation and so on.
Using CM when trying for a girl: Err on the side of caution, having intercourse 2 days before peak CM symptoms occur. Use patience and common sense, and eventually you may have to try having intercourse the day before peak symptoms happen.
Using BBT when trying for a girl: Again, err on the side of caution, and assume the last low temperature (the dip) is the probable time of ovulation. It probably isn’t actually until later, but schedule intercourse for three days prior to that anyway. After trying on that day two months, move in a day closer to ovulation.
If your cycle is irregular: If you really want a girl and your cycle is irregular, the only solution is to exercise patience. If the length of your cycle varies greatly month to month, you can try using 1 of 2 formulas.
The first formula is to take your earliest ovulation date from all your data and subtract 3 days to get the day of your cycle you should have intercourse on for a girl. The second formula is to take the length of your shortest cycle and subtract 17 days to get the day of your cycle you should have intercourse on to try for a girl.
This method may not work for several months, but if you have the time and don’t mind waiting for a girl, it should work. Try at least 2-3 months before inching closer to your potential ovulation. Move in by periods of 12 hours. For example, if trying on the evening of day 13 didn’t work for 3 months, try the morning of day 14 for another few months. Dr Shettles warns that condoms, and not any other form of birth control, should be used the entire time ovulation is possible.
Using Ovulation Kits when trying for a girl: Intercourse should stop at least the day before the LH surge is detected in the urine. Having sex even the day before would put a couple in the “boy zone.” Dr. Shettles recommends testing twice a day to detect the surge and understanding all the advice for conceiving a boy so those trying for a girl know what not to do. He further warns that if you’re pretty sure you’re in the safe zone, your LH surge hasn’t been detected, but you’re experiencing “peak” CM symptoms, you’re still at risk for conceiving a boy.
If at all possible, use CM, BBT, and LH surge data in concert to best determine when to conceive a girl. He does mention one more helpful study (that needs verification) that the LH surge is most likely to occur in the morning hours in the spring and summer and in the evening during fall and winter.
The sum up: Have sex with condoms during practice cycles and after your attempt to conceive a girl. When trying for a girl, have sex daily from the time bleeding ends until the cutoff day – four, three, or two days before ovulation. Abstain from sex completely until a few days after ovulation has passed because intercourse may stimulate female secretions that favor male sperm.
In the past, Dr. Shettles has recommended a douche that would help the womb be more acidic and favorable to female sperm. He no longer recommends these through his book, but directs you to consult with your physician. He states that the douches never harmed any woman using them, but he no longer recommends them as part of his method.
Intercourse Recommendations: Dr. Shettles says the “missionary position” makes it less likely the male sperm will be deposited near the cervix. Shallow penetration will deposit the sperm in the more acidic vaginal canal, favoring the female sperm. Finally, the woman should avoid orgasm, if possible, so the alkaline secretions that favor male sperm will not emitted, nor will the orgasmic muscle contractions that help propel the sperm towards the egg.
One last note – avoid caffeine. Studies of women who drink coffee suggests that it reduces fertility, even if drinking only one or two cups a day. Other studies indicate that caffeine can also lead to miscarriage. Smoking and alcohol can also reduce fertility in both men and women.
Q&A highlights
If you have very scanty cervical secretions, you can use over-the-counter cough syrup that contains only guaifenesin - absolutely no codeine. If trying for a boy, take it for the 3-4 days before intercourse.
2. It is more likely that women ovulate 14 days from the end of their cycle than 14 days from the beginning of their cycle. Keep this in mind when calculating your ovulation data.
June 11, 2008
This book was awesome! After 3 boys & so many boys in my husband's family that it's borderline ridiculous, I am expecting a GIRL!!! I totally credit this book. I read the whole thing & followed the directions it gave, fully ready for either girl or boy, as long as I could say I tried on my last baby. It worked! What can I say? I totally believe that science is flexible. Sometimes the things our bodies do are just as important as what they can do in a lab, & this book was the perfect blend of those things. I loved it. It was easy to follow & the things it said to do took a while, but worked. I recommend reading it at least 3 to 4 months before you plan on starting to try for a baby because you have to do some homework with your body before you can try, but it worked for me, so it's worth it.
June 24, 2015
I read this whole book from cover to cover. That being said, I thought a lot of it was a waste of my time. The author kept saying why his method was better than the other methods out there for sex-selection. Hello, if I'm reading your book than I've already picked it over the other books out there.
Also, he described the method at least 10 times in various forms (and I already understood male sperm are faster, girl sperm live longer, etc). I definitely understand his ideas (after how much he drilled them in) and I agree that they will probably increase your chances of having the gender you prefer.
But after reading it I realized that I don't want a girl that desperately. Tracking my temperature and other things for 3-6 months is not worth it to me. I obviously would like a girl after 3 boys, but I wouldn't mind having another boy.
*Update: We did get a girl after our 3 sons. Yay! :) **
Also, he described the method at least 10 times in various forms (and I already understood male sperm are faster, girl sperm live longer, etc). I definitely understand his ideas (after how much he drilled them in) and I agree that they will probably increase your chances of having the gender you prefer.
But after reading it I realized that I don't want a girl that desperately. Tracking my temperature and other things for 3-6 months is not worth it to me. I obviously would like a girl after 3 boys, but I wouldn't mind having another boy.
*Update: We did get a girl after our 3 sons. Yay! :) **
December 18, 2025
Didn’t work for me.🤣
June 11, 2017
This book is about using natural methods to help "choose" the sex of your baby, with a 75-80+ percent success rate. The method was developed by Dr. Landrum Shettles, a biologist and one of the creators of in vitro fertilization, who made many other significant contributions to the areas of reproductive science and fertility in his time.
How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby is well organized, and the method very well explained. As with most nonfiction books these days, this one includes a long segment at the beginning telling the reader why one should follow the Shettles sex selection method as opposed to any of the others out there. Later follows a chapter directly debunking the other existing methods. While at first I rolled my eyes with a "here we go" long sigh, I actually found all of these sections very interesting and informative. This was a can't-put-it-down book, if you can believe it. And now I can't stop talking about it to anyone who will listen. Hah!
How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby is well organized, and the method very well explained. As with most nonfiction books these days, this one includes a long segment at the beginning telling the reader why one should follow the Shettles sex selection method as opposed to any of the others out there. Later follows a chapter directly debunking the other existing methods. While at first I rolled my eyes with a "here we go" long sigh, I actually found all of these sections very interesting and informative. This was a can't-put-it-down book, if you can believe it. And now I can't stop talking about it to anyone who will listen. Hah!
September 18, 2017
I'm not sure if I'm going to use the method or not, because as many reviews said... it takes too long. But this book gave me enough information to increase my odds, and all the information was backed up by scientific data.
It is a bit repetitive but this means you'll definitely get the method by only reading the book once.
The only reason I gave it 4 stars and not 5 is because it needs an update ... I'm using a device called OvaCue to track my ovulation that didn't exist when this book was written. I would love to know what Dr. Shettles has to say about it.
It is a bit repetitive but this means you'll definitely get the method by only reading the book once.
The only reason I gave it 4 stars and not 5 is because it needs an update ... I'm using a device called OvaCue to track my ovulation that didn't exist when this book was written. I would love to know what Dr. Shettles has to say about it.
February 27, 2020
Nice
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 6, 2021
Worked for us. Also read "Taking Charge Of Your Fertility" if you want to be confident in tracking your cycles.
March 19, 2025
It worked for us -- coincidence? science? you decide
September 6, 2017
This book could be much better written than it is. Shorter. More concise. I don't need to know the whole history,guys. Seriously. And the defensiveness was a turn off. I take it Dr. Shettles hasn't received enough respect and validation for his excellent work or something.
The writer also tries to be funny and in places and it actually incorrect--drinking the blood of animals wont kill you. The Masai tribe in Africa drinks fresh blood every day and is quite healthy. Scottish peoples and Korean peoples thrived on blood sausage. Also, the tribe that used to use alligator pee or something as a birth control method was shown to actually have something there. It may not be a big-pharma pushed man-created molecule, but it did have the right hormones in it to prevent fertility. There have always been stupid ideas, but just because the idea is old doesn't mean it's stupid.
Finally, I think the Whelan method research is more convincing, which offers the opposite advice of this book.
The writer also tries to be funny and in places and it actually incorrect--drinking the blood of animals wont kill you. The Masai tribe in Africa drinks fresh blood every day and is quite healthy. Scottish peoples and Korean peoples thrived on blood sausage. Also, the tribe that used to use alligator pee or something as a birth control method was shown to actually have something there. It may not be a big-pharma pushed man-created molecule, but it did have the right hormones in it to prevent fertility. There have always been stupid ideas, but just because the idea is old doesn't mean it's stupid.
Finally, I think the Whelan method research is more convincing, which offers the opposite advice of this book.
January 4, 2011
I love my boys. No question about it. And if someday I am blessed with another boy, then I will be full of joy. That being said, there is A LOT of testosterone in my house. I wouldn't mind balancing the scales a bit. I struggled with how many stars to give this book. It is so darn repetitive that it probably only deserves 3 stars. However the information seems solid and with an 80% success rate over the last umpteen years it gave me hope. And since hope is such a wonderful thing, I gave 4 stars. If I happen to have a little girl in roughly a year and a half from now, then I'll change it to 5 stars! (FYI for those interested, start reading this well in advance because you have months of homework ahead of you before you actually try to conceive.)
November 12, 2007
I just finished this book (thank again, Jennie!) and I thought there were some really interesting things. I only gave it a "four stars" because, 1) I haven't actually tried it yet so I don't know if it will work for me, and 2) because I thought there was way to much info trying to "convice" me when I was already sold. I understand the need for the convincing of skeptics, but I wish it said something like, "If you already believe it will work, skip to chapter 6." I believe it works since my sister tried it and got her girl. It was a good read for me to use to prep for when we go for our next baby (girl) sometime next year! I'll keep you posted!
August 9, 2008
Ok.. so we got this book in anticipation of the last child we decided to have. We were hoping for a boy this time.. and did everything EXACTLY as the book instructs. We DID get pregnant the first time that we tried this method.. and we ended up with another daughter!! It has some interesting thoughts and insights into how our reproduction process happens, however it did not do as advertized. That being said.... I am SO GLAD that it didn't work. I wouldn't be albe to live without my little Nacho who was born 7/9/07!!!
September 29, 2015
I read this a couple years ago but held my review for when I could, ahem, try it out and see if it worked. Based on our exhaustive study of n=1, it doesn't. But, as he points out, it has only a 75% success rate for girls, which is essentially just cutting the original 50% chance of a boy in half, right? Also, he makes it clear this is not a method for people who can't bear to not get their pick (triple negatives, yay!). So I felt adequately forewarned. We were just meant to have three little musketeers, and I'm really digging the name Santiago lately, so....
September 21, 2012
very interesting book? It answered some questions I had in mine! I did plan for my first daughter but not the second that was my husband doing he want it baby he was so sure it was a boy !yeah right the day of the sonogram came and he still bet me is was going to be a boy !when we ask the lady what it was she tall us it was a girl ,my husband start it to cry and I was laughing at him he lost his bet with me ha!it been 9 years now ,and we want to try for the boy naturally ,we'll see what happens !any recommendations are welcome
May 24, 2007
This is definitely an intriguing concept, to be taken with a grain of salt. However I was hoping for even more scientific evidence. Although they have some studies to back the method, much of the information is anecdotal. I have not yet tried this method myself but would definitely consider in the future and would be happy with either outcome.
March 14, 2010
Look for a review in Issue 14 of The Birth Project magazine. Lots of clear explanations for understanding just how conception occurs. Great information on attempting to determine your ovulation date. As for the gender-determination techniques, everything is dependent on you knowing exactly when you are going to ovulate, and therefore relies on a significant amount of guesswork.
July 25, 2010
Will have to see if it works to give it a higher score, but easy to understand and logical. As an OB nurse I can see how all the theory in this book makes sense and as the book points out there is no sure fire way to have a boy or girl naturally, but I do see how the information in this book could tip the scales. Really I thought I might try it just for fun, so we will see!
April 21, 2009
I thought this book was really good. It is very helpful in explaining menstrual cycles and the whole bit. A worthwhile read for anyone interested in getting pregnant in the future, regardless of whether you are trying for a specific gender or not.
July 25, 2009
If anyone really wants to try for a certain sex they should look at this book. It's pretty science based. I don't care enough to go through all the work, but maybe if I still have all boys a few years down the road, I'll follow the instructions exactly.
January 15, 2015
As someone who doesn't have female reproductive organs I found this book very educational. I recommend everyone (males and females) of ages 15 and up to read this book whether you plan on having kids or not.
October 11, 2007
Put this one into the "can't hurt, might help" category. That being said, we did get the girl we wanted... but hey, it's a 50/50 shot.
February 11, 2009
This theory of "sex selection" really seems to make sense to me. We'll see if it works - give me... 11 or more months to let you know!
December 5, 2009
We bought the version of this book available in the summer of 1988. How do I know that? Zak. And we proved it again with Kat. No joke.
November 19, 2016
want to read
April 24, 2008
We'll see if it works in the future. Most of the book was just bragging.
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