Benilde Little, the beloved bestselling author of Good Hair and The Itch, is a writer whose works are touchstones for legions of people because they reach deeply into readers' lives. Her new novel will do that again. Acting Out is the probing, poignant, and ultimately uplifting story of a woman caught between the life she thought she was supposed to lead and the dreams she gave up long ago. Ina West grew up independent and solitary, raised by an artistic, unavailable mother and a reliable, loving father. As a twenty-something photographer, Ina landed in Manhattan's bohemian art scene after college, at the same time that she started dating the devoted, hardworking Jay Robinson. When her mother's mental state began to deteriorate, her closest cousin became dangerously ill, and her free artist's lifestyle put her in some vulnerable situations, Ina found comfort in Jay's trajectory into the safe, privileged world of the African-American upper middle class. Forsaking her independence and creativity for the joys of family life and material wealth, she married Jay, had three children, and moved to the suburbs; gradually, Ina gave herself completely to motherhood and the upkeep of their increasingly luxurious lifestyle. And they had it the SUV, the lavish home, the expensive but casual wardrobe. Then one day, after twelve years, Jay comes home from work and announces that he's leaving. Amid her shock, grief, and fear, a single clear truth though still physically present, Ina herself had checked out of the marriage long ago. As she struggles with single motherhood, reduced financial stability, and the emotional roller coaster of her breakup, Ina undertakes a journey of self-discovery with no sure destination. She moves to a smaller house, rekindles an old love, and takes up photography again. The old adventuresome, independent Ina begins to resurface, tempered by a self-knowledge borne of she has learned how to look unflinchingly into her past and to determine what she wants for her future. Little delves into some of the most private and difficult questions people face. This moving, ambitious, and accomplished novel explores the fallout -- and the healing -- that can occur when the African-American dream crumbles, and when a woman is torn between divergent lifestyle choices. Ina's story of loss and courageous self-revelation will resonate for any woman who has struggled with finding her path in life.
After I closed this book I scrolled through some other reviews and was saddened to find that other people didn't look at Acting Out with the pure, aching love that I do. This is a book that reminds me why I love to read in the first place. Benilde Little is a talented writer, turning paragraphs into pure prose. It's a character study, above all. A flawed character, albeit.
I think, perhaps, that my view of this book is shaped by my view of marriage overall. I've seen plenty of marriages within my family and the one thing that I've understood from all of them is that it's hard. The fantasy dream of a nice husband and a happily-ever-after faded away as I started to see these lifetime commitments as what they were: two people trying to create something based on an impossible ideal of true love. Whatever that meant. I got scared for a minute reading this book when the protagonist pondered over how you could never marry your real, true love. Luckily, I was comforted by the end.
I've watched my mother all my life and she's allowed me to peek into the deeper sentiments of womanhood and motherhood. To me, this book is incredibly authentic. It's beautiful and ugly and real. Just like life.
I pray to God that when I am older I can take the lessons from the people around me and books like these and fall in love but never, ever forget what makes me me. To all people, but especially black girls, read more books by black authors, particularly black women. There's a level of honesty in them that is hard to find. One of my favorites.
I have owned this book for a couple years, but just pulled it out and read it a couple of months ago. I'm glad I waited to read it, because I think I appreciated it more now than I would have then.
Ok, I just wanted to get through this one. I like a story and I like a story that seems to have some direction. This book just seemed all over the place. A woman, once an aspiring photographer marries a man going places. They build a perfect life together. An immaculate, beautifully designed home, and three children. She's a stay at home mom, busy with her book club, mom and tot playgroups, shopping, and attending dinner parties.
Her world is turned upside by an event that makes her reassess what she really wants out of life. She flashes back to different times in her past where she may have settled for something less than what she really wanted. Whether it was what her mother thought best for her, or her husband. Remembering when she was "different" and was ok with being different. It seems like a coming out of a mid-life crisis type of book. Kept you a few steps away from saying: "This book is depressing." I wouldn't recommend anyone run to the bookstore to get this one. After awhile I was just reading to say I finished.
I've read most of Benilde's books and this was the least favorite, although I stayed engaged and completed it. I did have an opportunity to see Benilde at a book signing after reading the book and walked away with a better understanding of the book and an appreciation of where the inspiration came from. It's a different pace and energy than her other stories.
I read this book after buying the Hardcover on the sale rack for $5.00 or less at B&N. It was good. I read her novel Good Hair, years ago. The story of Ina and her marriage is realistic fiction. I give it a 3 or 4 out of 5.
This book is a great character study. Women in their late 20s/early 30s who are at a point of self-discovery will relate. I read this over and over again.
In Acting Out by Benilde Little, Ina, the mother of three, acts out when her husband Jay tells her he is leaving for a younger woman. She leaves the house, kids and her life behind for a few days to decide on her next plan of action.Thankfully, her neighbor and family support her during her hiatus.. When she returns, she eventually rediscovers her love for photography and makes her way as a freer, more self-sufficient person. This roundabout journey takes the reader through parts of the east coast as Ina reminisces about her days at Howard University in D.C. She often revisits the area while being based in Pomona, New York. An interesting read!
IQ "Being crushed was not an option for me, I thought, but didn't say. It was the thing that was different between black and white women: she always had someone, and something to fall back on, a husband and if not him, a father, a brother and so on. It was part of the background, the entitlement of a white woman in a culture where that means something. I am a Black American woman and we don't come with those kinds of backgrounds." 219
The theme mentioned in the quote selected to open this review would have made this book far more interesting to read if it had been further explored. Instead it was almost a passing thought. In keeping with tradition, Paige the neighbor, is kept far away from Ina and the reader, we just know that she goes above and beyond to help Ina but not why or the state of her own marriage. While Ina's quote resonated in this case it was a ridiculous thing for her to say when she happily relied on Paige's staff to look after her kids and then had an extremely helpful father. Furthermore she had the means to have hired a nanny when the kids were growing up so the fact that she hadn't and then bemoans how she has no time to herself once that option is off the table is something I found ludicrous. I know you don't always read books to make friends but Ina was an incredibly frustrating character. I understand not writing someone off if they only cheat once, I truly do but her other option was barely even explored.
I did find the complexities and secrets of marriage deftly touched upon. Obviously marriage requires maintenance and work but the author does a good job of explaining how people can truly grow apart or what happens when you marry someone knowing they're holding a part of themselves back. I was proud of Ina of course for surviving the marriage midlife crisis and I'm sure the nervousness we feel when we're starting over or trying something new i something most readers can relate to sans marriage. My other favorite quote came from Ina's new boss; "If you don't have passion in your work, you'll become a drama junkie, creating dramas of nothing. It's why people gossip, shop, have love affairs, no passion in their lives, no work" (Marina, 226). I found that to be an intriguing idea and something to keep in mind. I've read many good things about Benilde Little so I'm eager to try another one of her novels in the hopes that it will resonant/at least entertain more than this one did, though Acting Out was still decent.
Ina, the female lead character, is a hypocrite. The story starts with her husband leaving her for another woman which turns her world upside down and she begins to analyze her, as she puts it, "wearing someone else's clothes to fit into the Christmas card family perfect image" mentality. She was written as the victim/survivor/heroine but never addressed the fact she had an affair before her husband did because she was bored and looking for something. I guess hers was okay because she didn't leave her family and choose him. Well he was married too so...yeah. I liked the fact that she decided to pick up art again. Even though her husband had been suggesting for years that she pursue her passion again. Knowing the tasks of homemaking and shuttling kids would be too mundane. Ina was self-centered and scattered; simply Acting Out in the ways of a toddler.
I enjoy Benilde Little's books and I really liked this one. I could definitely relate to the main character, Ina. The only things that I didn't like were the ending, and the fact that she didn't wind up with Kevin. Things were left up in the air. Sure, she had built a life with, and had children with Jay. Sometimes you wind up with people who don't share your ideals. But that aside, I almost didn't want it to end.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
I didn't enjoy this book at all. I gave it a 3 because I'm otherwise a huge fan of Benilde Little.
The main character wasn't likeable and I'm not 100% sure that she reaches the resolution she needed. A lot of her issues just get swept under the rug and I'm not trying to read that.
Maybe in real life people live like this, but Acting Out is a black chick lit book. There needed to be a more definitive ending lol.
This book was just OK. At first I liked it but then the main character started to bug me. Maybe it was because she didn't have good values about her marriage. But she eventually "found" herself instead of trying to to hide behind money and a nice car and her kids and her husband. She cheats on him and he cheats on her. Not a very good foundation for a marriage if you ask me.
Loved it, but then again, I always enjoy Mrs. Little's writing. I've read all of her titles and wouldn't rate any of them less than a four out of five. This one really spoke to me - as a woman who is actively seeking to enhance self and achieve some of my own personal goals. The main character is utterly human and easy to relate to.
ok... first of all I cannot remember the last time I made myself stay up until 4 in the morning to finish a novel...:) I began reading it early evening and felt the characters calling to me... Ina is in a little bit of all of us... it really pierced the heart of some things that I could not articulate but have and still feel... this book was a great reminder to stay present...
This book has a time and place. It is recommended for women going through a tough place in either their personal or professional lives. It is a book to give you the courage and faith to move forward despite any and all challenges presented. But definitely above all, the message is to never lose sight of yourself and your dreams. A little corny but there are moments I really enjoyed.
Good story of a woman who did what she thought society expected of her and lost herself in the process. When her marriage falls apart, she is forced to reflect and redefine her life. The plot line jumps around a bit too much, but overall a good read.